Therapy Talks with Dr. Ken Bono

Introduction

• Hosted by Haley with guest Dr. Ken Bono
• Discussion on Dr. Bono's book and concept of "probing pride"
• Focus on working with individuals suffering from shame

Dr. Ken Bono's Journey

• Personal experience with shame discovered through therapy
• Realized lack of understanding of trauma in early 2000s
• Further training in diverse therapeutic approaches focusing on trauma

Understanding Shame and Pride

• Shame vs. Pride: Basic human emotions related to valuation and devaluation
• Shame as Emotion: Acute, comes and goes
• Traumatic Shame State: Chronic, intransitive, person feels fundamentally inadequate
• Pride: Can be healthy (accomplishment) or maladaptive (arrogance)

Relational Trauma

• Developed by Alan Shore, involves brain-mind-body connections
• Occurs in relationships, often due to a failure to regulate (abuse, neglect)
• Subtle Neglect: Absence of basic emotional support can lead to shame

Shame in Therapy

• Hidden, often unrecognized by individuals
• Shows up as feelings of inadequacy, worthlessness
• Naming shame can provide relief, starts healing process

Probing Pride

• Delight in one's own being and others'
• Moves beyond achieving pride to valuing one's self and others

Therapeutic Approaches

• Integrative approach using various modalities
• Importance of naming and working with body-based therapies
• Sensory motor psychotherapy: Focuses on body to complete adaptive actions

Suggested Readings and Resources

• Dr. Bono's book discusses shame, pride, and trauma in depth
• Offers insights into therapies and client examples

Conclusion

• Importance of understanding shame in relational trauma
• Therapy can be transformative with the right approach
• For further exploration, Dr. Bono's resources are available online