my friend Bob Chapman when he was younger he he he he was having a crisis of faith and so he went to his priest and he says um I I uh I don't think I believe in I don't think I believe in God and His priest said good thing God still believes in you people come along at different times like you can't force someone to have a conversion or you can't force somebody to believe if we we don't know what their story is we don't know that maybe they've worked for horrible people in the past maybe they've come from companies that had terrible cultures maybe they've been twice Once Bitten Twice Shy like maybe they're coming with their guard up like I don't know what their experiences I don't know what their story is so just because we are well-intentioned and we're all like chipper chipper and studying leadership that we expect that they come in in the first three weeks of their employment how come you're not all in everybody else here is all in like you got to meet people where they are some people jump right in head first and they're really excited when they come into a new culture um and some people are slower just let them come at their own pace but you just keep doing the right thing and most importantly you got to be consistent right you can't just do it once or twice you got to do it all the time and it's the little things that add up more than the big things so I always think the balance of intensity versus consistency so intensity is something like this you've come in for three days it's an intense time it's intense education you're on this this is and anything intense is easily measured um and and and captured in time right but consistency is the little stuff that is innocuous and doesn't seem to do anything like saying good morning you know in the hallway well that does nothing if you do it once but what if you do it every day you know like how long you know when did your wife fall in love with you like I don't know like it wasn't because you remembered her birthday or border her flowers and Valentine's Day those are intensity it's the little things you did like when you went to get a drink from the fridge and you just brought one back for her or the game was on and said honey can I talk to you and you hit pause on the game and you said sure what's on your mind right like little things like that that in in a vacuum do nothing but when they add up people fall in love and it's the same in leadership it's the little things it's the brushing your teeth not going to the dentist you have to go to the dentist twice a year that's intensity but if that's all you do your teeth full out so you can't just rely on the big rahas the big leadership things the big coaching things very important you got to brush your teeth for 2 minutes in the morning and 2 minutes in the evening every every single day and it only works if you keep doing it and that's what leadership is it's the boring mundane daily little things and some of it is so easy some of it is so easy right let let me show you one of the easiest things you can do can I borrow someone's phone can is phone I can borrow yeah thanks I'm G to show you something I'll show you a little thing right so here I am I'm sitting in my office and you walk into my office uh and while I'm sitting here just now now right do you feel I'm not I'm not making a phone call it's not buzzing it's not beeping I'm just holding it do you feel like you're the most important thing to me right now no right there's a deep-seated psychological reaction to the device I'm not doing anything so we show up to a meeting and we put the phone on the table and by the way putting the phone face down is not more polite right how do you think it makes people feel makes you makes them feel that they're not the most important thing right now if somebody walks into your office and it's just on the desk how do you think it makes people feel employees or patients uh or worse when somebody looks away and you're on it for 30 seconds how do you think it makes people feel right put the phone away when there's another person that you want them to feel like they matter it's so easy put it in a back pocket put it on a shelf put it on a drawer eye contact thank you very much can you catch well done so eye contact right uh facing your body towards somebody hey can I talk to you sure what's on your mind right little little things like I said these things in a vacuum do nothing but if you do them over and over and over again I can tell you how powerful they are a marine once told me he says his test for being a leader is if you ask somebody how they're doing you actually care about the answer how are you uh it's been a hard day okay cool well I'll check you after lunch right no how are you not doing so good what's what's going on right these are skills they're very easy to learn they're very easy to practice but you got to do them and over the course of time sometimes quicker for some people sometimes slower for others you will build an environment you will build a culture where people feel seen feel heard feel like their matter and you will watch them give you their Blood Sweat and Tears to help your business grow that's how it works