you know how when the barber gives you a terrible haircut you got to wait a couple weeks before you can regain all of your dignity and confidence yeah that was me except tomorrow was Monday and I had to pull up to school with the worst haircut that I had ever gotten in my life on the day that I went to school not only did people call me a cancer patient I had found out that I failed my Chinese test and that the teacher had played the voice recording in front of the entire class yes it was a voice recording IES test okay this isn't like some tragic backstory but I remember going home going through my usual routine where I'd usually play video games after school just chill Chase dopamine to be honest and scroll and sleep late and not be disciplined in anything that I would do and I remember going home that day looking myself in the mirror and telling myself for the first time I looked myself in the eyes when I said this I said I hate you I absolutely hate you and from that day forward I remember immediately I just head downstairs went into the sauna and I stayed in there for as long as I could I did not set a timer I did not have music or anyone else just me burning alive in the sauna because I actually wanted to endure something for once I wanted to endure pain instead of just chasing quick dopamine every single day scrolling on Instagram for hours a day I wanted to prove to myself that I was actually in control from that day forward I made a promise to myself that things would change that things would be different that no longer would I just Chase quick Pleasures easy dopamine but I would actually invest in myself so that future me could have something to thank current me for I made a habit tracker started meditating cold showers journaling I did everything on the list right I did everything that you could possibly think of and before I knew it my life began to change before my eyes not only did my life and the people around me start to notice a difference but I started to respect myself for the first time I started to be confident in myself for the first time the way that I walked changed the way that I sat in chairs changed everything about me changed and I began to cut away from who I used to be until one day it just all snapped back I was back to eating junk food sleeping late all my old bad habits that I had worked so hard to just try and quit try and quit try and quit this isn't me anymore this isn't me anymore like no matter how much I denied it it was happening I was going back to who I used to be and I couldn't understand why it was just happening and I was like all this hard work I don't deserve this this isn't me this is who I used to be why why am I turning back to who I used to be and it would frustrate me for so long and I just felt like no matter how hard I tried I couldn't stay disciplined and now I finally figured out why it's because I lacked not only a sense of self a level of self but also a level of my my circle you see I had a purpose I had a purpose for why I wanted to improve myself it's cuz I hated myself and I was done with my Shenanigans right but my level of self my who I saw myself as my identity it didn't align with what I was trying to become keyword is trying to become not only that but my circle the people that I surrounded myself with the music that I listen to the content that I consumed none of it aligned with who I was trying to become and so of course I would eventually snap back because because not only did I see myself as someone who was trying to be on self-improvement but the people around me weren't even trying to improve themselves either Not only was I like internally something was wrong but externally my environment it was dragging me down so what did I have to do well you brush your teeth twice a day I hope so at least and you do that because it is a standard of hygiene that you keep for yourself this standard of hygiene is a part of your identity I know like it's kind of a silly analogy but it's a part of who you are right and you will not breach or go below this standard because it goes against who you are you have a higher standard than that in the same way with self-improvement when we fail to stick to our meditation schedule or stick to our cold showers right when we get out of bed it's because our identity doesn't align with that we see ourselves as someone trying to be on self-improvement rather than someone who is already on that self-improvement rather than someone who's already there and you could say oh yeah but I just started and I haven't worked that hard for it like I'm still a beginner but what you don't realize is if you neglect that then you will stay in the same place forever because you haven't changed your identity you've only change your habits internal State equals external reality and you're trying so hard to change your external reality like I was I was trying to change my life my external reality I wasn't changing my internal State I was trying to change my habits my actions but if you want to change yourself or change the world for that matter you have to change what's in here first and what's around you I had to drop a couple friends because they just weren't serving me I had to listen to songs with lyrics that would actually serve me people who would actually push me think of a circle right you're in the middle of the circle the circle's going to mold you it's going to shape you but it's also your limits you can't grow beyond your circle unless you grow your circle as well so not only do you have to transform yourself but you also have to transform your circle and you have to have a clear purpose of why you're doing what you do so if there's one thing that I could say to my past self it's that there are only three things that you need to do in order to take your life to the next level I know that there are so many things and so many videos that you can watch online with a million different habits and schedules and morning routines to be on but there are only three things that you need number one it's self your level of self self resect self-esteem self trust self-confidence you build this through traditional self-improvement but number two which is a deeper layer and it's going to help you with yourself it's your circle once again your circle isn't just the people you spend your time around although that is extremely important important it's the music you listen to the content you consume like videos like this the books you read and this shapes yourself whether you realize it or not and so if you really want to maximize your levels of self you need to maximize your levels of your circle to elevate your life elevate your circle and it will naturally bring you up your level of self is capped at the level of your circle and finally your purpose I had a purpose for why I was working so hard right I hated myself and I didn't want to hate myself any longer and so I worked so hard because of that dissatisfaction so self Circle and purpose these are the only three things that you need screw the morning routine if you don't have these three things you're you're cooked and so don't overthink it okay there are so many millions of videos that could tell you all these different solutions to all the pain that you're having but just give these three things a try and that's all you really need if I could just focus on myself who I surrounded myself with and why I'm doing what I'm doing that's all it takes that is all it takes and I hope that you can just take my word for it and trust me because I've been through so much frustration just to get to this point so while everyone is struggling with doing their habits and getting consistent on self-improvement you're actually going to be an intelligent person and understand that hey it's not a habit or discipline problem it's an identity problem because when I solve my identity problem and I change who I fundamentally am everything else is going to follow everything else is going to align to who I see myself as it's going to feel right it's going to feel feel like the last piece of the puzzle that you've always been missing so self Circle and purpose are the three pillars of what I call self-mastery and self-mastery is essentially just the next level of self-improvement because there's just so much detail and foundation on top of the normal self-improvement that we go through to FastTrack your initial self-improvement journey and so 90% of people aren't even aware of this they're just stuck trying to make their bed every day and get in the damn cold shower but they don't understand that it's an identity problem it's a circle problem and that there's so much more that goes into it than just doing the hard work when you don't feel like it when it's aligned with who you are it's going to be fundamental that you do all these habits that you actually take control of your life because it's who you are if you'd like to work with me to FastTrack your self-improvement progress and get on self-mastery I'm opening for a limited time spots for onetoone mentorship with me personal calls give you my full attention all my resources to you I've been working so hard on this I've put 10 hours into this just yesterday and to be able to give this to Someone Like You who is in a position like me back then and save you all the time and frustration that would just mean the world to me and so if you're interested in working with me getting on calls with me then click the first link in the description I'm so excited to bring this to you I've been working so much on this because I know just how purposeful this will be and how much pain this could take away from you because I've been through this if you don't want to work with me that's fine everything that I say in this video still apply it still use it still take it and and apply it to your own life because I don't want to have people that just keep spiraling in this Loop of I need to make my bed but I'm just trying to be on self-improvement guys like no change your identity when you change who you are everything else aligns with it your internal State affects and equals your external reality do not neglect that the friends that you spend your time with you're the average of The Five People You spend the most time with do not neglect that and on top of that understand why you do what you do why do you work so hard who are you trying to become you owe to me you owe to you you owe it to the universe to become that person click the first link in the description if you want to work with me and subscribe it's a win-win for both of us as always get after it [Music]