Transcript for:
Strategies Men Use to Manipulate Women into Chasing Them

have you ever found yourself chasing after a man like a complete idiot isn't it crazy how with just a little manipulation he has turned you into the man you're asking him on dates you're letting him walk on your jacket so his little bitty feet don't get wet while you're still wearing the jacket it's time you end this depressing cycle okay which means you must first understand the strategy being used on you so here are the six steps that men use to bait you into chasing them and how you can avoid them forever welcome to the Players Club if you're participating and paying attention to me and everyone else in the live stream I want you to say here are present so I know you're here you're present and you're paying good amazing attention okay we got sh here of course uh we got uh Molina in the YouTube chat we got Enlighten a over in the YouTube chat Enlighten a says congrats on 7K thank you so much she's talking about 7K on YouTube uh 7K subscribers uh we got CA over in the YouTube chat uh Anitra we got uh vennie over in the Tik Tok chat Michelle Scotty uh magdalina Mia uh I'm sure we got lots of other people who are going to be here and present throughout the live stream all right let's get started guys on this beautiful Friday so number one this is going to be a great topic today uh number one we have selection okay now I'm going to tell you from a man's perspective when we want to figure out the girls we can actually bait into chasing us there is a selection process obviously not all women are created equal and treated equal and for there it will only be a specific type of woman this will work on so if you feel like you've ever experienced it in your life before that's because you're one of the women it works on okay now when I say selection what I mean by that is as men even if we're emotionally stunted we still understand that there are certain things we can do and get away with with with certain people and certain things with certain people we would never even try or attempt to get away with why because we know that we have to approach different relationships with different people differently okay and so the selection process is understanding what can I get away with this person and how much can I get away with okay what am I allowed to do what am I allowed to not do what am I allow uh what will she accept what will she not accept now when we're talking about baiting you specifically into chasing us the men we are looking for a woman who is in desperate need for attention and validation okay you've heard those words from me before if you've been participating in the live stream that's because those are the biggest things holding you back if you didn't already know all right we are looking for when we want to bait you into chasing us we're looking for the fact that you will have a desperate need for validation and attention right or some sort of insecurity that is leaving a void in you that you would be seeking that externally or really appreciate that externally from someone else I.E a man right and so you're probably thinking how do men realize this how do they know that I'm desperate for validation and desperate for attention how can they feel this when men are so emotionally stunted there's no way they'll know this they will know this trust me it's actually not hard to sense when we meet you go out on a date with you or even just meet you in person in general it's not hard to sense the women who are desperate for validation and attention it will actually remember we talk about spirituality we talk about energy and all that good stuff on here on the show it will actually be oozing through your pores okay like a nasty sweat like a musty smell it will be oozing through your pores that you are desperate for validation and attention Okay because when you go out on these dates men will be able to realize that love bombing works on you that you're easily manipulated uh by compliments and nice words right words are a great way to manipulate you because they get your emotions all fired up and overwhelmed and then you get all discombobulated and you can't think straight right the selection process is the process of understanding are you one of those women I can manipulate right specifically are you one of those women who are desperate for attention and validation from me or any man in general that if I come along and I make you feel like I'm feeling a void that you've been having now all of a sudden I can control you because I am feeling those voids okay it's understanding that if I want uh if I'm trying to access mind control in some way in some ways in some senses right I have to approach the people who are already in a place within themselves that mind control would even be possible a woman who is too secure this won't work on I can't bait her into chasing me right because there's a lot of things I have to utilize as it relates to anxiety I we're going to talk about fear in a little bit right there's a lot of things I have to utilize to my advantage to be able to manipulate her right remember I always tell you guys the number one way people will manipulate you but specifically the men will manipulate you is through your emotions regardless of the men being emotionally stunted or not they still understand how to manipulate and get what they want from you and over time as they grow and develop they realize the best way to get what they want from you is to manipulate your emotions get you over stimulated in some places and under stimulated in others as it relates to your emotions make your emotions feel like an uncontrollable waterfall that then you begin responding and reacting just based on how you feel without any logic or thinking tied to what it is you're actually doing okay so the first step is the identification of who you are if you are even the right candidate to be someone that I can bait into chasing after me you want to know why because it serves me if I get you as a man chasing after me and I get you in a Perpetual cycle of chasing after me and I can hold that right I get access to you free access to you whenever I want whenever I want I said whenever whenever twice wherever I want however I want for however long that I wanted and in return this is the best part in return I get to give you absolutely nothing nothing you get in return for all of your hard work and all of your chasing in fact all that you do give to me in the process of you chasing after me and Desiring me and doing all this great amazing stuff for me and courting me like a man would right in the process of you doing all of that I actually take everything that you've given me and I take the confidence that you give me by chasing after me and I take that and I go and give that to another girl who is not desperate for my attention and validation who doesn't even look my way that I actually have to court and be interesting to and put my best foot forward and do all of that amazing stuff that you wanted from me I go and give that to another girl who hasn't even been paying me no mind okay and this is actually what's happening I told you if men want access to something as they grow from boys into men they want access to more Squirtle they have desires we've talked about this before right they're going to figure out techniques in order to get access to whatever it is they want as quickly easy and pain and efficiently as they possibly can and so over time this isn't necessarily something they grow up with they learn the techniques to get access to this Squirtle as quickly easy and efficiently as they possibly can can so as they develop these techniques they begin to understand that these techniques work best on a particular type of woman who is lacking that void of attention and validation that has that anxious personality that we can utilize sorry we can manipulate all of those different emotions in order to get the result that we are seeking is that make sense to you guys so far right so naturally the next logical question becomes how can I stop myself from being one of those anxious uh anxiety-ridden uh validation seeking attention seeking woman that needs that from a man that he can then manipulate me through that funnel my answer to you in order to be able to do that you first must begin finding yourself I know that sounds so philosophical and lame and stupid and dumb but what I actually mean by finding yourself I'm going to try and give you real information you need to figure out who you are and what you stand for and what you find fulfilling okay when I say you need to figure out who you are I mean you need to figure out like really who are you as a person okay I don't think some of you really understand what that means okay it's not just enough to live and exist you have to actually be thriving and in order to be thriving you can't just be doing the bare minimum in life just kind of floating through life not knowing where it is you're going you as a woman also need direction so you need to know what it is your goals are you need to know what it is you're striving for you need to know what it is you're working towards and I'm talking more than just I want to have a boyfriend okay the way you find that out you actually have to go out and do things and test things to figure out what you're passionate about to figure out what you enjoy doing to figure out how you enjoy spending your time in the process of you going out and trying things and doing things you will eventually come to a realization of oh this was what I was meant to be doing this is how I fit into the world this is what my time is meant to be focused towards okay I know you're thinking but I just want to get him to text me back in 30 seconds I don't care about a passion I don't care about a hobby my passion and my hobby is getting guys to like me I just want him to like me I don't care about anything else I'll abandon everything else I'll throw away everything else if he just likes me look look the reality of it is that mindset is what puts you here in the first place when all you can think about is I just want him to like me I just want him to text me back that's all I care about I don't want any other information other than how he can text me back quicker and how I can get him to like me the truth of the matter is he will never like you when all of your focus and time and attention is being put towards how can I get him to like me how can I get him to text me why cuz like I said that mindset is like a musty body odor it seeps through your pores and follows you everywhere you go it's disgusting and the men can sense it on you I'm being so serious right now right the men can sense that musty scent of desperation and looking for attention and validation on you especially when you're thinking I just want him to like I just want him to I just want him to see me I just want I just want I just want but the boys but the boys but the boys but the boys and boy crazy right the men don't see you and think oh I want to love that girl who's so desperate for love no they actually see you and think wow I can definitely take advantage of that girl who's desperate for love right because the girls they actually respect and the girls that they actually want and they actually chase after are not desperate for their love and attention actually they could care less about their love and attention which is why they go out and try to uh be seen right and they start chasing after those women do you understand what I'm saying I know for some of you you're like oh but it why does it matter so much I I just I just care about him so much and I just I just want this to work so badly and I I just I just want him to like me so badly cuz I like him as much and why can't he like me the same [Music] way you have to understand whether you're whether the partner you're with or you're spending time with is is a secure person or an anxious you have to understand what that does to people that desperation actually repels people it's very very repulsive it's like body odor okay and I told you when we're selecting the type of women that we're going to get to chase because th this think about this if I can get you to chase me like I said it all only works out in my good and I get to have you around forever while I stall and wait for my actual woman to come around until I actually can get access to her so it benefits me to actually go out and find the women who I can get to chase me the problem is as you continue having that mindset of oh I just want the men to like me I just want them all to text me I don't care about anything else I don't want to figure out my passions or Hobbies I don't want to try anything except trying to see more boys right as you continue feeling like that the men continue to treat you like that and you continue to be even more and more desperate for validation and attention from those boys when your actual energy should have been spent figuring out what you enjoy what you like and what makes you feel fulfilled and I listen look in my eyes this is the part where you have to pay attention if you've been half asleep look in my eyes right now as soon as you begin investing in yourself and your mind goes away from what about the boys what about the boys when that finally disappears from your mind I guarantee you that is the same moment those men will be lining up to try to get access to you why because it will be oozing through you that you are secure and not desperate for their attention or validation and what happens to the men they go cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs and they begin chasing after you right because you're setting up the situation properly so working on that is actually going out and trying things to figure out what it is you enjoy it doesn't have to be the biggest thing in the world just try something small just go to a place you've never been before one time then go to another place you've never been before one time and just keep trying things until something clicks you will never know what it is you find fulfilling and have enjoyment out of and what your passion is if you don't go out and try things and there's so many things for you to try I promise you just because you're a woman that doesn't mean you can't have passions or Hobbies outside of just wanting to be someone's girlfriend or wife I I promise you it's not a it's not a crime I can assure you that okay it's okay for you to have passions and hobbies outside of just wanting to sit around and be someone's girlfriend I can I can assure you that's okay okay now I know some of you want super ex like you know direct examples of what exactly should I do how exactly should I do it okay now if you want to do that and you want to figure out what to I give you guys such easy steps it's hard to mess this up and I've said this to you guys before very simple some of you are on Tik Tok right now watching me some of you are on YouTube I'm sure most of you have access Tik Tok if need be head over to Tik Tok all you have to do is type in in the Tik Tok search bar things to do in my city wherever you live so if you live in Chicago things to do in Chicago if you live in Toronto thanks to do in Toronto thanks to do in LA thanks to do in Miami thanks to do in London thanks to do in Manchester thanks to do Nigeria things to do in I don't know New York wherever you are and you type that in to the search bar and you will see a bunch of amazing content creators that will make content for the sole purpose of showing you things that you can do in that particular City if you live in a small town just do it for whatever the biggest largest city is that's closest to you okay and then you can lit you don't even have to do any research all you have to do is scroll through all of the thousands of videos that exist there and pick one that you find interesting and go there okay grab a girlfriend if you want and go there if you really want to do it solo you can do it solo as well and just continue trying things until you figure out what you enjoy after you figure out what you enjoy right there will be a process of you actually focusing your time and attention onto something else other than just boys all the time and that's good because you'll begin fulfilling yourself and you'll begin growing your own confidence within yourself that it's not all predicated on what a man thinks of you okay I'm a man telling you your whole sense of self-worth and value shouldn't be based on what the men think of you because the moment you start thinking like that that's when they actually think less of you all the girls that walk around with the attitude that they don't give a damn what the men think those are the men who are sorry those are the women who are getting all the attention all of the women who are sitting down like sad sad little mouses like do you like me please can you like me please please I would I would appreciate it so much if you would like me they're like oh my God you're disgusting Get Your Filthy fingers off of me okay that's how they think of you okay so we want you to fill your validation voids right and Desperation voids that you're not constantly seeking that from the men that you're going out with okay am I making sense to you guys so far or you guys confused still I know when it comes to examples or when when when I'm like okay you should do it like this you guys are like how should I do it tell me exactly how to do it I don't know how to do it if you don't give me a direct example I don't know how to live my life I don't know what to wear in the morning if you don't tell me what to wear you got to tell me exactly what to do okay Nana says the pikm yes they would be called pikm I I believe um Shir refers to them as Pik mishas okay nobody likes a Pik Misha I know Shir says it all the time if you guys listen to Shir on YouTube um but I'll tell you as a man nobody likes a Pik Misha literally nobody I'm telling you this as a man the only Pik mishas that get attention they're getting attention for the purpose of being used they're not getting attention for the purpose of actually being wied okay I'll be the first one to tell you Pik mishas only get attention because we realize how we can take advantage of the Pik mishas okay it's not really about the fact that we enjoy Pik Misha so don't don't don't be confused by that I know sometimes that can be confusing uh because sometimes you might think oh well you know the Pik mishes get attention so if I do it then I should get it no no no that's not the same type of attention and it's not happening for the same reason okay I want to make sure that we're all on the on the same page all right so um uh di says we need to be confident in ourselves 100% I agree okay 100% I agree so we have the selection was number one number two we have attention now after we have selected The Woman based on the mindset that we know to be the easiest to manipulate after we have selected the woman now it's time to focus on giving her the attention in the right way that will trigger the emotion we're trying to and the feeling we're trying to elicit from her that will then we'll be able to manipulate her through okay so if we know that we are with a woman who is desperate for validation and attention we're going to begin now implementing this attention and validation in very vast large quantities that make it very overwhelming for someone who's been starved of validation and attention this is where the love bombing comes in okay it's like AKA love bombing right because I know if you've been void of attention and validation and that's what you're seeking desperately from any man that you're in a relationship with or any man that you like or or likes you now I know if I give give you a whole lot of that at once you'll get all discombobulated because you won't be able to think straight all you'll be able to think about is how amazing it feels to get all this love and attention at once from a man and you'll be in this dream ro oh my God say it again how much do you how how big is my dump truck say it one more time oh my God how small is my waist say it one more time oh my gosh how how volumtious do you think by yies are say it one more time oh my and you're just like it's just like a it's like a drug right every every time like every time he compliments you as even as he's going over I want to make you my wife girl yo girl I I want you to have my kids girl yo the way you walk around you a goddess on this Earth girl yo I this I met you when when I met you was love at first sight girl love at first psychro love at first psychro I just L my eyes on that huge dumpy and it was love at first psych girl yo me and you we need to run off together we should get married tomorrow you want to get married in a church tomorrow yo can buy your dress right now girl we don't we just need the papers we don't need the family we don't need nothing we going to run away to and it goes on and on and on and on and you're just like oh my God you're like you're you're literally having a a a squirtle G gasm okay like you're going crazy over here it's like the mental gasm right and you're going crazy here because he just keeps hitting you with all of this attention all of this validation and all you can think about is the how amazing it feels you're just in Wonderland right there's a reason for that because once we've identified that you're one of those girls and we know that we can Hammer you with that I'm talking the the emotional Hammer not the physical Hammer right the emotional Hammer right it will easily get your emotions heightened and overwhelmed where your emotions become like a waterfall and you can't think or see straight because all you can do is feel this rush and over stimulation of emotion that oh my God finally my validation from a man oh my God finally my attention from a boy oh my god listen to all the beautiful things he's telling me meanwhile you won't be actually thinking about the fact that what he's telling you doesn't even make logical sense okay right like when these men are telling you that oh when he first laid his eyes on you he knew that he loved you and wanted to make you the mother of his children as soon as he laid his eyes on you you'll be so overwhelmed with how nice it is to hear that from a man that you won't stop to think that actually doesn't make any real logical sense because if we're talking about you basing your knowledge of my character on why you would want me to be your wife and why you would want me to be the mother of your children then you would have no understanding of what my character is just by seeing me in a room just by watching my dump truck walk around in my tight pants and then you'll start to think to yourself well there's no way it can actually be about my character why you want to wife me it literally can only be my volumptuous yies or my ginormous dump truck that is making you feel like you want me to be your wife right but you're not thinking about the logic all you're thinking about is how amazing the words sound and how amazing you feel when he's telling you those things okay as say he says or my money maybe in some maybe it's the money as well okay right all you can think about is how you feel and how amazing it feels to be getting that attention that you're easily distracted by everything else and every and and any other um logic that would naturally be associated with what he was saying to you I always give you guys the example I've given this example before if let's say you were walking down the street on the sidewalk and a guy came up to you and he was like oh my God girl you got the most prettiest succulent uh amazing beautiful feet girl your toes they're so suckable I could just kiss them right now I wish I could just put whipped cream on your toenails eat every crevice of your toenails I bet you your your toe jam tastes like real Jam girl I can't believe how much I want to suck on them toes of yours and you're hearing him say this and then you look down at your feet and you're like bro I'm wearing shoes I'm wearing shoes how can you see my feet you like it's great that you think my feet would be suckable and amazing but it doesn't make any logical sense you literally can't see my feet so you wouldn't be able to determine all this describing your doing of my feet and how amazing and succulent they are that's great but there's no way of you even being being able to determine that you can't see them right and it's the same thing for these men who love bombing you with the love at first sight with the oh I met you we went on two dates and now I know I want to date you we went on we went on three dates and now I know I I want to be everything together we want on this and now I know how I I just want us to spend the rest of our lives together no no no no no no this is part of the strategy okay and we're going to get to it you're going to see how it all unfolds and how it all works together because it's so hard when you're hearing this to realize because this is the craziest part this is the craziest part when they're saying this to you you're going to feel like they're the ones in heavy pursuit of you and you're the one being chased after like like like crazy right you're going to feel like oh my God this man is chasing after me insanely look at how much he's complimenting me look at how much he's he's he's he's saying to me look how amazing the words he's saying look how much he's talking about he wants me to be his wife and all this stuff he wants to commit to me oh my God this guy's chasing after me crazy I'm in my feminine he's in his masculine oh my God he's doing the most chasing that is the that is actually the the craziest part of the trick and the Finesse is that right at the beginning when it's all working how you think it's supposed to work right it's going to feel like he's the one chasing after you but what he's really doing is setting you up to keep your guard down that you won't realize when the bait and switch happens okay Andrea says and they say they love you after 2 weeks 100% you guys see as I'm talking about this you guys are starting to replay in your minds the situations that you've been through that are exactly like what I'm discussing now you understand what I'm saying and you know the types of things you'll start to be more aware of the types of things that the men will say to you and what they'll do to you or with you when they're trying to icit these specific overwhelming emotions at the very beginning that you'll easily become blinded to what's actually happening underneath the surface okay right remember yes was it yesterday or two days ago where we talked about um was yesterday we talked about enchanting a man right the same way you can become Enchanted by a man if you allow yourself to fall into the Trap of the love bombing and the over stimulation of the senses when he starts telling you all this great amazing stuff in the first two weeks with no intention of actually executing any of it that he's talking about okay because at the beginning it's really going to be a lot of words not a lot of actions and not a lot of things for you to actually observe as facts but the words feel so nice because you have nothing else to go off of that if you're easily confused and manipulated you'll you'll easily fall into the Trap of believing in everything that he's saying that by the time the bait and the switch comes all right or by the time he takes from you what he was looking for which for the most part is Squirtle you'll be sitting back confused like oh my god I didn't even realize how did this even happen okay and I don't want that for you right uh nikesha West sent uh $5 in the Super Chat and YouTube thank you so much nikesha I really appreciate you by the way I wanted to shout out Miss St Louis Miss St Louis for the past couple days has been gifting on Tik Tok as well I think she's been like top gifter on Tik Tok so miss St Louis I really appreciate you for gifting on Tik Tok as well I see your donations and nikisha of course thank you so much for the $5 Super Chat on YouTube okay love you all for the gifts so attention number two okay so first we had the selection then we have the attention so that we can now set you up for the bait and switch cuz now you're so overwhelmed by emotion because of all this attention you're receiving for when you thought you would never receive this type of attention from a man now it's time for the bait and switch that oh feels so good right when done right because you'll never see it coming this way okay so this is where the bait and switch comes in after the selection and after the attention I now begin the hot and cold treatment so I'm sure when you hear me say you're probably traumatized okay hot and cold treatment is great for us in this scenario for many reasons when I now know I want to flip the script on you and I know that you're easily manipulated by through your emotions your emotions become a vehicle and that I can use to pull strings and elicit whatever response from you I want so if I know that you're desperate for attention and validation and I know that giving a lot of that attention and validation to you will get you to be overwhelmed and overjoyed and over the moon now when I take that away from you what am I doing I'm giving you anxiety I'm giving you sadness I'm giving you confusion right I'm taking you on each of these extremes okay because remember the emotions are the ways I'm going to control you that's how you become a puppet to me so if I want to control you through your emotions it's not just about making you feel positive emotions all the time and I told you guys about this with the Enchantment of a man right that was just in the reverse so for for us when we want to debate you into chasing us it's not just about you feeling the Overjoyed uh emotions of oh my God now you want to be with me oh my God now you want to make me your wife oh my God now you want me to have your children right it's also about making you feel the anxiety and the desperation desperation of feeling like I no longer am interested in you why because you begin questioning yourself as if you've done something wrong to elicit that response from me when in actuality that was my plan the entire time okay let me break that down a little bit more right so as I pull away from you let's say let's say we're in a relationship right and let's say on the second day I'm telling you how much I want to make you my wife I know for sure we're going to be in this long relationship I know for sure we're going to last forever I know for sure I want to make you the mother of my children and I tell you all this amazing stuff about your character that I wouldn't actually know because I don't actually know you that well but I just project onto you this amazing character you're so nice you're so generous you're so kind you're so sweet you'd be such a great mother and I don't actually know you but I'm just saying it and you're just you're just taking it in you're taking it in you're taking it in and then after about let's say 3 weeks of that that right all of a sudden I start pulling back on that right when I say pulling back on that I mean pulling back on the intensity of oh you're the most amazing woman ever I want you to be my wife I want us to go here we got to go on a trip to Greece we got to go on a trip here I want to take you here I want to take you around the world I want right and it starts to become less and less now I'm texting you less now I'm calling you less even when we do speak I'm not really as engaged right I just seem very uninterested I seem very detached right and that coldness right especially the coldness not just in itself but the coldness in contrast with how hot it was at the very beginning now your alarm Bells go off okay now you've went from feeling the extreme overjoy happiness positive emotions over here when I was love bombing you and now you're feeling all of these negative bad emotions because sadness because of how I'm taking it away from you you begin to question yourself right you begin to question yourself and say did I do something did I say something did I uh am I uninteresting did I become boring let me know in the chat how many of you have ever been in a situation where a guy has used a hot and cold treatment on you and then you begin to begin to question yourself and wondering if you did something wrong oh me right let me know if that's ever happened to you where you've been in a in a in a situationship or a relationship where after he does his hot and cold thing now all of a sudden you're questioning yourself and thinking of all the possible things you might have done that would have made him uninterested in you let me know if you've ever been in that situation uh I see uh CI says it happened to me uh arst says yes uh uh Molina says yep me and light a says yep in the YouTube chat nikesha says it constantly happens I see a lot of people on the Tik Tok chat saying yes um Ever After says yes Diana raised her hand uh sassy says I did sh says yes okay Brie says uh uh but what's scarier is I didn't know and I asked him if I had done something wrong that's crazy uh uh Kina says this is definitely happened to me bana says yes okay Angie says it's happening now wow that's crazy okay uh de Deno Deno Deno says almost in all my relationships okay and the the crazy part about that is after right we give you that hot and cold treatment and You Begin questioning yourself now we it becomes a hands-off process see all of the work of the baiting you into chasing him was at the very beginning where he had to select you and then give you just the right amount of tension through the voids that you had to perfectly fit the needs that you had but now that he pulls back all he has to do is let this simmer right you're like it's like you're on the stove he just got to let it simmer let it sit let you continue pondering on what it was that you did what it was that you said how it is that you acted let you begin to question everything about your relationship question everything about your the person that you are question if you're even worthy of his love question if you're even worthy of his time and attention right because logically you'll begin thinking the only way he could go from being super interested in me to being not interested in me at all is if I did something that offended him that repulsed him that repelled him and so because that that's the natural logic train that you would follow any human being would follow you now start looking at yourself and you know going back on yourself and looking okay what did I do on this day you're you're now analyzing every single bit of behavior what did I do on this day what did I say on that day how did I text him did I call him did I did I text twice oh maybe I didn't text enough maybe I didn't call enough maybe on the dates I wasn't interesting enough maybe on the maybe on the dates I didn't talk enough and maybe I was just sitting back and then and then he realized how boring I was maybe I don't dress nice enough maybe my dump truck is not as big as the other girl's dump truck and now he realizes my dump truck is is not is not a really nice dump truck and now and now he's interested in other girls dump trucks Oh my God I don't have the volumptuous yies like everyone else has then you start looking in the mirror you're like oh my God my yitties are so much smaller than every other girls yies he doesn't like my yies that's why he's uninterested in me and maybe if I had bigger yies he would be more and you're going inane you're spiraling okay and that's the that's the crazy part this this part of the process is hands off he doesn't have to do anything because the less he says the more you can be in your own head and this is the key element okay this is why I want you guys to be paying attention this is the key element to how the script eventually gets flipped right because as you begin thinking all of this oh my God I did this and I I did that wrong and I did this wrong and why would I do that and why would I say that and you're now overanalyzing every single little bit of your own behavior without him saying anything or addressing anything right now the the next logical step after you analyze your own behavior until uh you know until you're blue in the face right after you analyze every single little bit of your behavior you now begin thinking of what it is you need to be doing in order to get back the version of him that was super interested in you okay this is the key pay very close attention you begin to have an internal mind switch from saying to yourself oh I am doing this right sorry I I am here being courted by him he wants me he's chasing after me he likes me after he pulls away from you and you begin thinking to yourself what did I do wrong what did I say how did I act what does he not like about me why is why is he uninterested in me now you begin thinking what must I do in order to get him reinter interested in me as he once was interested in me now you're cooked you're literally cooked you're finished okay because now you begin embodying the mindset of someone who is trying to actively seek the approval of the man you're dating okay so you're dating a man but you're constantly thinking about how you can get more of his approval and satisfaction and validation that he will be more happier with you that he will eventually be as interested in you and go back to chasing you as he once did because part of this process of being cold is you're going to feel like he's not chasing you anymore and the problem is when you're super desperate for that attention and validation that's really going to Sting the fact that he would pull away from you and stop chasing you and the fact that that stings you want him back in the position that felt the most comforting to you which was him Chasing You overwhelming you with a whole bunch of Love bombing that's where you're the most happy and now that you don't have that and that's the only thing that your life is centered around and that's the only way you'll have self-worth or self value now your world has come crashing down and so you desperately want to regain that Dynamic but instead of doing things for yourself that will help him uh be more interested in you or make yourself more desirable you end up doing more things for him and pushing forward towards him to try and alleviate your pain of that distance and that coldness that you're feeling from him okay this is the very pivotal switch that happens that leads to you eventually chasing oh so sad eventually chasing the man okay it's the very simple bait and switch so after we get through the selection and figure out that you're the desperate in need of validation woman we then get to the attention right then we got to the hot and the cold and that's where we had the gigantic mindset shift in you now we're set now that we have you in the right mindset that we want to this is where the breadcrumbing comes in okay how many of you know I know some of you are super smart smart how many of you know what breadcrumbing means answer me in the chat if you know what breadcrumbing means I want to see how many of us already are aware of this okay I want to see who knows right Banna says she she knows okay Sharon says the bare minimum Miley says me tell me what do you guys think it means uh queen says giving a little and taking it away uh C bernardette says I don't know it's great we're going to discuss it so now you'll learn something new uh Jenny says unfortunately yes uh goodness hell says uh giving a little attention when they when they want to uh Rick says little bits in the YouTube chat Special K says uh being a victim too many times and light a says verely giving you the time of day uh artist also says yes and cie says she knows what breadcrumbing is as well okay I'm glad you guys know and I see some people that don't know and that aren't aware it's okay we're all going to learn together Molina says a form of manipulation giving us just enough to be hooked okay some of you are very smart Okay so bread crumbing it's a great process for if you want to manipulate someone whether you're a man or a woman breadcrumbing is a very efficient process in this specific scenario if a man understands now that you are desperate for the attention and validation and how you begin to become anxious when you don't receive that this is now a great place because now you're in the mindset where you're trying to prove to me any you can that you will get that same level of intensity and passion from me that you felt at the very beginning of our relationship so now what I do is I basically right I basically tote the line between giving you just enough attention and validation that you still feel like it could be a possibility to that that we have the relationship you are imagining we would have at the very beginning but I never give you enough where it actually feels like you're getting the same amount of focus and and attention that you once got from me when I was love bombing you at the very beginning right there's a specific reason for this breadcrumbing right because you're constantly going to be in limbo between feeling like you finally did it just enough to get him back interested in you but not enough where you actually feel like you've really done it and you just constantly feel like you're in a relationship but you're super unsatisfied but you can't really pinpoint why you're unsatisfied you just know that you want to continue chasing after the satisfaction or the Fulfillment the problem is with breadcrumbing that fulfillment never comes and it's never supposed to come because if I'm baiting you to chase after me it's never going to come because if it never comes you'll continue pushing forward trying to force it to come this is where you start to actually pursue the man okay this is where the flip happens because now that you've already adopted the mindset that I need to do things in order for me to get you back into the place where you once were love bombing me being so apprecia of me giving me all these compliments even though they didn't make logical sense but at the time they just felt good you just want so badly for a relationship to resemble that that you once felt at the very beginning that now you're you're willing to do absolutely anything now you're the one pushing forward and and doing the most oh now I'm calling him now I'm now I'm the one asking him on hey are you are you are you busy today uh uh if you're not busy today then are you busy the next day when can we go on a date I it's been like a month since we went on a date I know you're so busy and you can't you don't have time for any maybe I could just stop by your house and I'll and I'll cook and I'll cook you some food you know I'll stop by your house I'll cook you some food you can use my Squirtle and and then I know you have to go to bed soon so so maybe I'll just cook you some food and then you can use my Squirtle directly after you cook I cook the food and then I'll just go home after and then like maybe we could just spend like a little bit of time together like if we could just cuddle for 5 minutes no 2 minutes no 30 second I'll okay I'll cuddle you while you while I make the food okay yeah just that's enough for me I'll tell yeah do you think you like me as much as you used to like me do you like me still like do you love me still or is is is it different now or do you think like it's a little bit different now right and he's sitting back like oh yeah this is great this is great this is great and you're spiraling like you're in front of him you're like Silly Putty you're spiraling going insane and he's sitting back he's saying nothing right because he understands that the less he says the more you'll spiral and the more you spiral the further you'll push to try to gain his attention and validate you'll be like this please can you can you see me can you look at me please I don't I feel like you're not I feel like you're seeing right through me I feel like I'm invisible and you're actually looking at the girl's dump truck that's that's standing right behind me can you see me or no just can you tell me if you see me or no do you love me or no is it is it different now right and you're just you're just cycling just cycling and you feel like you're just not getting enough and and the crazy part about it this is that this is how the bread crumbing comes in cuz as you're chasing cuzz now you're in Chase mode okay now you're in Chase mode as you're chasing he'll begin to allow you to chase him this is as weird as it sounds right he'll begin to allow you to chase him but he'll actually make himself kind of hard to get okay so you're going to be chasing him but he's never going to give you the validation of making you even feel like you've actually got him back to the place where he once was so you're constantly going to feel unsatisfied you're going to be like this analogy I've given before you're going to be like the rabbit chasing the carrot right he's going to dangle that carrot a validation and attention in front of you right and you're going to be so you're going to be oh my God I just if I could just taste just a tip of the carrot I would love it so much and you're going to go like this oh it's I just had a little bit it was like a little taste and I just I felt so good and I if I could just reach and and stretch and do the most and whatever I can do to just get a little taste of the carrot and oh it's gone again and it's when it was so close I felt like I had it that time I just I would do any oh it's right and it's always out of your grasp it's never firmly in your grasp and when I say firmly in your grasp in the analogy his validation and attention the love bombing the feeling that you once had at the very beginning of the relationship that you're trying to chase after and recreate it never quite feels like that and it never quite feels that that satisfactory and fulfilling because you're constantly feeling like he is not as interested in you as he once was he doesn't care about your relationship or you as he once did he doesn't find you as attractive or desirable as he once did when in reality all of that was actually manufactured desire manufactured attention manufactured validation that he could lay it on thick at the very beginning even though it didn't make any sense sense to be laying it on that thick at the very beginning but you weren't thinking about that because all you were focused on was being overwhelmed and Overjoyed with all of these amazing words and phrases and feelings that you were feeling and so because you weren't worried about how or if that made logical sense now you find yourself in a position trying to chase after a feeling that was manufactured in the first place and so you will never find your happy place you will never find your fulfillment you will never find the same satisfaction that you once did when he was manufacturing all of those feelings right that you would become over emotional about the relationship and distracted on what's actually happening okay Rosie said we need AI boyfriends for validation that's funny okay are you guys following along with me so far right right uh uh strawberry strawberry Bud says why do all men act the same cuz they're all the same well you like I said before as the boys mature they realize the specific techniques that they can use in order to get a squirtle as easy and efficiently as possible so the reason you feel like a lot of the men are acting the same is because they're using the same techniques because they realize that these techniques work they don't work on every girl but the type of girls that they do work on they work 100% of the time which is why I know for some of you you guys like to ask me I see some of my I read every comment so I see some people they comment yeah that's great but you should start teaching the man how to act you should teach the man how to be gentlemen you should teach the man how to be respectful you should teach the man how to do the right thing you should teach the man how to date you should teach the men this teach the men that tell the men this cuz the men are effing up the men are idiots the men are the worst the men are doing all the things that are bad in the in the dating world in the relationship World make sure you fix the men that's all you need to worry about don't you woring about telling us what to do with the girls tell the men what to do tell the men tell the men how to be act right let me let me let me let you in on a little secret those of you that feel that way okay let me let you in on a little secret I could sit here till I'm blue in the face telling men how they should act and treat women yeah guys look at me I'm wearing all white I'm a I'm a handsome black man you should treat women with respect you want to know why because that's the right thing to do and in this world where everything is sunshines and rainbows we always do the thing to respect all others we try our best to respect people's boundaries and treat them the way we want to be treated because in this world of kindness and happiness and joy where we all Frolic in flower booms that's how everyone deserves to be treated and so when you go out and you see your women make sure you take your time with them make sure you don't manipulate them make sure you don't use their emotions against them make sure you don't try to extract anything they wouldn't want to give you just go out and treat everyone with kindness and respect because the black man wearing all white said so right I could say that and then you want to know what's going to happen directly after that they're going to say cool story bro um I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing because why would I do more work to get the same result that I've been getting from these girls when all I have to actually do is sell them a dream that they already want to believe in get access to their Squirtle and then I can move on to the next girl why would I treat all of them with respect because a black man on the screen says I should makes no sense I'll be behind all the other men who don't do that and manipulate these women they're going to be sleep sleeping with all the men that I want to sorry they're going to be sleeping with all the men they're going to be sleeping with all the women that I want to be sleeping with meanwhile I'm the loser sitting around treating the women with respect and kindness waiting my turn and then all the other guys who don't do that get to run through all the no no no I'm not doing that that's a waste of my time okay and they're they're all just going to revert back to doing what they were going to do in the first place because it's not about treating you with respect or I don't want to burst your bubble men don't treat you with respect and kindness because you're so amazing that they want to treat you with respect and kindness they treat you with respect because they fear losing you and they're kind to you because they understand if they don't approach you the right way they will not have access to you in the first place okay so a lot of those actions are not are based on fear right that's fine but I want you to understand these men aren't going to change their approach simply because it's the right thing to do they actually need a real reason to change their approach and the only way they would change their approach is if they realized that the techniques they were using were less efficient and didn't work as well which is why I think it's a better use of my time to spend time talking to you guys you women about the things that are happening that you may have not realized in your relationship and the strategy IES that are being used that you can actively take that knowledge and work with that and understand what's happening that you don't continue to face those same situations because the guys are going to continue trying the techniques and continue utilizing them as long as they work okay so me telling them not to use the technique doesn't make it any less effective if you don't understand what the technique is in the first place and aren't able to have the knowledge to fight against that do you understand what I'm saying here do you understand why we're here do you understand why we're listening to this and we're learning and we're having a discussion here okay cuz I know for some people they get all distracted by tell the men to do this tell the men to do that tell the men to act better tell the and then they don't hear anything that I'm saying because all they want to focus on is how the men are doing wrong yes the men do wrong okay that's not that's not shouldn't be news to you you're not looking to be in a relationship with every man you're only looking for the man you're looking for so let's figure out how you can filter out all the men who you're not looking for by understanding more of these strategies and techniques that are being used on you and then also coming up with some strategies and techniques for yourself that you can use to get your desired result okay I always talk to you guys about having a destination in mind that way you don't get distracted by putting your attention and focus on where your destination isn't okay I I see so like like for example you know uh uh people be like oh why can't the guys on dating apps be respectful and not just want to utilize me for my Squirtle let's be for real okay the guys that are getting on dating apps aren't there to make their life harder if they're getting on a dating app they're not trying to make it harder to meet some a girl and get access to her they're actually trying to make it easier so rather than focusing on what it's so bad that the men go on dating apps and they just want things quick and easy how about you realize that the men want it quick and easy on the dating apps and you actually remove yourself from being in the places where the men who are looking for quick and easy are that way you can focus your time and attention on the men who aren't looking for quick and easy notice every time I talk to you guys about the bad men or the red flag men I'm I'm a red flag man so don't think I'm like a good green flag man okay but notice every time I talk to you guys about the bad men I'm never saying to you that good quality men don't exist in this world that's not what this is about it's about helping you understand the the how the bad men exist why they exist and what they're doing and why you can't get rid of them or avoid them okay that's what we're here to discuss and that's what I want you to better understand okay right uh Missing Lou says some women need to live in reality I think you know for some of us it serves as a it's a bit of a distraction right because rather than having to look inward it it can be it can be very um what's the word I'm looking for it can be very upsetting to feel like you're in situation especially when it comes to your relationships it can be very upsetting to realize that you actually played a role in your own bad relationships in terms of allowing people to treat you poorly sticking around why they treat you poorly and then also not looking out for the signs of people who are attempting to manipulate you or use you it can feel very very bad when someone points finger at you and says actually you're part of the reason for where you ended up in your own life actually your majority of the reason cuz people can only treat you bad if you allow them to people get very upset by that and they want to cast the blame on other people instead of thinking okay I know I messed up how can I do better now cuz that's what will give your desired result okay uh Rosie says I feel like I play myself I we all do okay but that is the first step to stop to actually having better relationships realizing that you have been playing yourself you've been stringing yourself along okay because that's what some of us have been doing for some of you that this resonates with you it's because you found yourself in this situation before right um and so when we talk about selection we talk about attention talk about hot and cold I talked to you guys about the breadcrumbing now comes in the fear all right fear is tough okay I told you guys this whole process of getting you to chase the man is all about the emotions because you're an emotional being and the more I can manipulate your emotions I can elicit specific responses out of you fear is a great emotion to utilize to manipulate you and in this specific scenario getting you to chase me as a man fear is the basis of what we will be operating under in order to get you chasing I'm talking about chasing heavy I'm talking about desperate now I'm not talking about just the light you know when are we going to go on a date I'm talking like now you're the one calling you're the one initiating every conversation you're the one double text you're getting literally nothing in return and you're doing everything reaching out all the time saying things all the time trying justifying everything that he's doing all the time right and you're doing all of this all the time okay why because I understand if I want you to chase me I want you to be in fear that you will not have me this is part of the hot and cold this is part of the breadcrumbing right I breadcrumb you and I pull back from you understanding that you will be in fear if you don't have me or you completely lose me why because think about it think about the contrast think about the contrast to what it felt like at the very beginning of the relationship when I was so into you when I liked you so much when I wanted you so badly right and think about how how horrible that would feel especially if you've given yourself to me in this time span in me love bombing you giving you all this overwhelming feeling giving you all these good happiness all this Joy overjoy all these emotions right how good you felt at the beginning and then you gave yourself to me in the span of you feeling all this amazing feelings all all these amazing emotions right you gave yourself to me it just mean give my squir give your Squirtle to me right and now that you've given me your Squirtle and you're starting to feel me pull back now the fear is starting to set in the fear that I'm pulling back but not just because I'm uninterested in you I'm pulling back because I don't even want to be with you anymore right the distance begins to grow and grow and grow to the point where now you're in fear that I might actually walk away from you or I might actually want another girl instead of you so it's not just about trying to regain the same amount of attention and validation I was giving you at the beginning now it's about trying to regain me in general okay you start embodying the psyche of someone who's like lost their ex and is trying to get their ex back even though you're still in a situationship or relationship with this guy right now you're on 100% offensive because you're in fear now it's not just about getting him to be interested in you again now you're scared oh my God I'm I think I just wasted a body if he leaves me or walks away I've completely wasted my a body I've completely wasted 3 months 6 months 7 months a year of my life I've wasted all this energy on him I've given myself to him I've tried to do everything I possibly could for him and he never and he never saw me he never he never appreciated me I try I tried to do this I tried to do that I cooked for him I said this for him I did this for him I took him here I let him borrow my car I did all the things I could possibly do that he would want to be with me still and he would show me that same attention and validation now he now it's not even that he just doesn't want me now it's like he wants to leave me and he's pushing me away right he's denying even my own advances to push forward towards him he's telling me he doesn't want to hang out anymore he's telling me he doesn't want to spend time anymore he's telling me he doesn't want to do anything together anymore or cuddle anymore or or do whatever anymore and so you stoop even lower because now you're now you're on like you're in emergency mode you're like I'll do anything to keep you so literally now you're you're begging him this is so sad and this will act this will be tragic to listen back to knowing some of you have actually been through this now you begin doing things like offering him versions of you and your relationship that give you nothing just for the sake of you having the tiniest hope of keeping him so you'll begin doing things like okay well we can just be friends with benefits if you want and you know you can do whatever you you want and it's like you know like you know like you know we can still hang out whenever you feel like you know you want to hang out and we'll just be like casual friends with benefits and you know like I'll just be around and and and like you know like you know we'll we'll like do our thing together and and stuff like that but I won't bother you and I won't I I won't like you know we don't have to be exclusive or anything knowing yourself that you're not going to be with anyone else knowing yourself that you're not going interested in anyone else knowing yourself that you're not about to sleep with anyone else but you're in so much fear that he's going to walk away from you that now you're literally like please take advantage of me use me however you want to use me just as long as you use me I will be okay with that little amount of validation because I feel like if that's the only version of validation and attention I can get from you is just by you using me every now and again and I got to live with that I will live with that I'm I'm I'm so like this is what's actually happening okay when you find yourself in a situation where you've gone from being in a relationship with a guy to now you're offering that guy friends with benefits right as an option for him to downgrade if you're allowing a man to downgrade you from like girlfriend status into something lower and he still has access to you after he downgrades you you've lost you've lost you've lost in ways I can't even put into words you've lost and you are lost okay after a man downgrades you from girlfriend status he should never have access to you again if you stick around after you've been downgraded the amount of respect he'll have for you is this big is this big okay it'll be nothing do not put yourself in a position where you are in so much fear now because of this desperation for the validation and the attention that now you're literally willing to give yourself away for nothing while he takes advantage of you and you continue to chase after him and his approval this is such a vicious the reason I'm talking to you guys about this is because this is such a vicious cycle I don't even think you realize once you get here right once you're down here in this fear level this is close to impossible to pull yourself out of because now you're chasing after something that's never going to come you're chasing after someone who doesn't even see you or is interested in you you're trying to Manu aure a relationship that is never going to happen and so it becomes extremely difficult to pull yourself out at this point I'll just be real with you okay because everything in your soul and in your being will be trying to justify why you should continue staying longer because as you continue investing more and more and more you continue finding it harder to walk away because of all the investment you've continuously put forward into the relationship okay and I'm telling you this cuz I I I'm telling you this as a man because I've done this okay I'm not sitting here to tell you I'm oh guys I'm wearing all white and I'm such an amazing awesome man and you should only look for I'm telling you this because I've utilized this on women and I have friends plenty of guy friends who sub consciously they might not be able to articulate it like me but utilize this on women okay it will be very hard for you to pull yourself out of this when you're in the hole this deep this is why like I said earlier it's vitally important that you take care of your validation and attention needs give yourself your own validation and attention that you don't have these void voids that end up being filled by men because when the men are filling those voids for you now they get to pull the strings and control what you feel your own selfworth is okay think of it like that if you have the void of the validation and attention monster in you that you feel like the only way to fulfill that is through the man's validation and attention just remember that that man will now be in control of what you think of yourself okay and if I'm in control of what you think of yourself I control you so inherently it's like giving control of yourself to a stranger cuz these people you're dating are strangers okay you don't know them right you only get to know them over time so effectively you're giving control over yourself your body your mind your soul your spirit to a stranger that gets to do with that power that control whatever it is he pleases if he wants to use you and squeeze the life out of you until you're dry and uh just useless he will do that it's up to his discretion how he wants to utilize you if he has complete control over you if you do not want to be giving control over yourself to strangers you need to be investing in yourself number one and you also need to be fulfilling your own personal desires your giving your self-confidence doing things for yourself figuring out what you care about figuring out what you enjoy figuring out who you are that no one can decrease your selfworth by taking away their attention or validation okay I'm telling you this because I know it really happens right I'm not just telling you this because uh uh uh you know I think it's the right thing to say like I I've actually experienced this from the opposite perspective okay so once you have the selection and you have the attention and the hot and cold then you get to the breadcrumbing you get to the fear now it's time for princess treatment princess treatment right because as long as he can continue you keeping this cycle ongoing and keeping you with the balance of fear that he's going to leave right he's probably got you in a situation where you're good with the friends with benefits thing or you're okay with him doing whatever he wants to do you don't really address it you don't really stand up for yourself you don't really set boundaries he knows he can do whatever he wants to do and this is where it's full-blown princess treatment at this point because now he gets to say you know what it it's not good enough for me to just utilize you what else you got you you got a car I can use I can drive you got money give me money give me money you got money I know Sky I remember Sky situation she had a situation where she gave not not not to out sky but Sky had a situation where she gave a guy $1,000 the last day that he saw her okay it's okay we all make mistakes right it'll be like you you got money give me money right buy me this buy me that take me here let me borrow your car can I use your place I want to throw a party at your place I'll just bring a couple of friends and they bring a girl I've actually seen this happen where um a guy is using a girl and she's so deep like she's she's so she can't pull herself out she's so deep that the guy actually this wasn't me by the way I'm being honest like I've seen a friend do this she was so deep in that the guy actually asked her to use her place to throw a party he threw the party there at her place and then he slept with the girl in the bathroom not slept obviously like you know he took got some pineapples in the bathroom of her place at the party he threw at her place this is real okay like this is real right and this really happens right because they they want to up the antee on the princess treatment after a while it becomes boring to just use you after a while it becomes boring to just you know have easy access to you it's not enough they want full-blown princess treatment they want you to be in Chase mode to the point where bro you you a full-on man that's why my uh my uh my uh my thumbnail on YouTube is you the man cuz you literally now you're the man you might as well go to the gym take testosterone and build you up a six-pack a a muscle pack just just get big cuz you're the man now you giving him all types of Prin princess treatment you got him borrowing your car you giving them money you you buying them gifts you taking them on vacation you doing all type type of that make me sad man you doing all type of stuff that you have no business doing for a man that you just started dating or that's not even your boyfriend you understand what I'm saying not that you should never do anything nice for a man but you damn sure don't need to be doing nice nothing nice for no strangers no strange men that you don't really know that have no commitment to you I'll like just be for real be so for real okay uh mabula says I would buy grocery like you know what I mean it's like when you look back on you think to yourself why was I doing that for someone who wasn't even showing me the same commitment or care or appreciation right buying groceries sending him money uh giving him money doing things for him doing chores for like going out of your way for someone who's literally telling you the best I can do for you is friends with benefits take it or leave it I'll take it I guess I have no other option and then you're you're sitting there what what more can I do for you master I'll cook I'll clean I'll do anything do you want me to give you money what else you need I'll crawl on my hands and knees what what else you want me to do I'll scrub your toilet okay I'll scrub your toilet and you're getting nothing in return literally nothing in return it'd be different if that man was was at least you know spending money on you or something like that you're getting nothing in return no respect right uh you probably barely even getting uh you're barely even getting schlong at that point right it's literally it's literally at that point just turns into Princess treatment and the ego boost of understanding that he has control over you that's where you you you've you've transitioned into the I don't know you're in outer space at that point where he's just receiving princess treatment and the ego boost from being able to manipulate and control you because the the princess treatment is great and the control is the ego boost that he needs that at a certain point he becomes bored with even utilizing your Squirtle he just likes to remind himself how much control he has Over You by periodically coming back and stepping back in and just being like oh what's up I'm back again time for me to use you and you can't say nothing about it because you're too desperate to stand up for yourself and every time you say okay he feels better about himself cuz he goes back and he says yeah yeah I'm the man yeah yeah you you you wouldn't you wouldn't you wouldn't stand up for yourself even you couldn't even try you couldn't even try the way I be laying down this long on you girl give me that princess treatment girl Fe me Fe me my grapes girl Fe me my gra give me the green ones give me the green ones make sure make sure you clean them off before you give them to me and what do you mean with that fan girl while you at it yeah yeah the way I be hitting you with that schlong got you sprung huh I'm telling you I'm telling you this how this how this how the men be thinking of you when you be when you be giving them all that right when you in full-blown Chase mode that's how they be thinking of you that's how they be thinking of you that's no cap that's no cap sad to tell you but at least now that you understand the technique and at least now that you understand what's happening you can understand how to work on that and avoid that okay we want to avoid that happening to you if it's happening to you we don't want that to happen to you ever again and so what are we going to do we're going to start going out for ourselves doing things that we enjoy for ourselves not just because we want to be around boys go places you like figure out what you are passionate about figure out what you care about start spending time doing that care about more things about yourself than you do about being available to boys right and you'll begin to grow your confidence in yourself and it doesn't have to be huge it could be going to a museum maybe you enjoy art it could be you get a canvas and you start painting stuff that you enjoy doing right it could be I don't know maybe you're a race girl you love cars you go to a car show or you go to a racetrack whatever it may be that you find interesting maybe you love hiking you love nature you start going on hikes right and eventually there's people that love running I seen the other day people in Toronto were posting uh a 5K run Club where it's like a whole bunch of people they just go on a run Club thing together and they all run this Trail together and stuff like like there's there is so many amazing things for you to do out in this world that is not just sitting on your couch and scrolling through dating apps I I can Cross My Heart Hope To Die I promise you to the I promise you to the heavens there is so many amazing things for you to do in your life that is not just sitting around swiping through dating apps and I promise you the more you step out of your house the more your confidence will increase the more your selfworth will increase the more your security in who you are as a person will increase and be solid and unshakable that no one can come around and give you attention and then take it away and use it as a way to manipulate you you'll just be like bro first of all you're coming over here love bombing me I'm not hearing none of that because none of what you're saying is realistic or logical you're just saying words that don't mean anything I'm not moved by that and then in the process of you not being moved when you see them uh you know trying to maneuver oh but you know I love you so much so so doesn't that mean that I should get access to your Squirtle no because you don't love me so much because you don't know me so I'm not giving you Squirtle and actually the fact that you're trying to manipulate me and giving you Squirtle because of how much you love me lets me know that you're not here for the right reasons and you'll become so much more smarter and capable of walking away from relationships or situationships before you even end up giving yourself to the person and you'll walk away with so much more self-respect you're happy I'm happy we're all happy okay now do you guys have any questions about what we just talked about uh I feel like you know my ex Sky says his tactics but he's a felon he can't go to Canada ELO that's uh actually that's crazy actually that's crazy I can't believe you dated a guy like that but we all make mistakes uh like that a trash dude his character for him to know what he's doing uh but want to F the girl up it's an ego thing it's an ego thing remember right if I can control you and I know I can control you and I can continue controlling you and you can't do anything about it that's that's an ego boost right Shar said that's why we demand money and bills uh paid because men are just a waste of our time hey you said it not me right Diana says you're awesome for educating us I appreciate it thank you very much I I try to give some knowledge on my own experiences okay right uh where where are the morals uh are we just raising Men wrong I I kind of talked about this before right I mean obviously it would be amazing if we could teach a whole bunch of men to respect and appreciate women but at the end of the day there's no amount of words I could use that will convince men that they should respect or appreciate women if the techniques that they've been using to get easy access to women continue working they'll just continue using those techniques so it's actually a better use of time if I I help the women understand what the techniques are that they don't get tricked by them because then those men who are not respecting or not approaching it the right way they'll have nowhere to go they'll have no women to to use you understand and then after a while they'll be forced to come and approach things with respect if they have no women to use do you understand how that works right uh hot mellow says uh the trust I have in you is insane I mean that's fine that's fine you can have trust in me right I think I think for some of you and let me know in the chat because I know that some of you have been listening to me for quite some time now I let me know has some of the advice have any of you been able to actually Implement any of the advice that we discuss and actually see it work for you how I said it would work or have you guys just been listening and been like I'm not actually going to try and utilize any of this or maybe even just been listening and been like I tried it but it didn't work okay maybe I'm just full of BS I don't know I might be I'm just a I'm just a human being okay uh Marcy says yes I I see Sky says 100 uh an says I followed you for months and it does work Georgia says 100 right Mia Jones says 100 right um brown sugar says I can see more clearly okay Brie says not dating at the moment though good good maybe you need to take a break uh I haven't taken the advice but be you become wiser okay okay Molly says can you answer me please what was your question I might have missed it um I'm uh Kina says I'm I'm I'm all over it using it now good s says I want to take my time and learn from you before I do the next step well by the time you make the next step you'll be so far ahead you'll you'll be like an expert okay which I'm glad for okay DD is a new follower so you got a lot to catch up on we've been here for a while having having great conversations for like months now you got so much to catch up so much amazing stuff to catch up on so make sure you head to my YouTube okay um we're I'll answer a few more of your questions and before we hop into the Discord because obviously today's Friday um and and we have lots of questions to get to in the Discord so before we hop into the Discord please make sure that you're uh if you want me to answer your question make sure you go into the link in my bio on Tik Tok if you're on Tik Tok and answer ask your question or you if you're on YouTube I pinned it right at the top of the chat the link to the Discord and you can go ask your question there cuz we're going to hop in there in a bit and answer these questions lives okay uh watermelon says where do these guys learn these techniques it's it's a it's it's a it's a learn technique over a period of time right so as time goes on guys learn okay I want access to Squirtle I also want access to Squirtle very easily and quickly and efficiently so it's just kind of a trial and error thing and they they gain an understanding of how they should speak and treat women in order to see the result that they want to see do you understand what I'm saying so and and also you have to keep in mind these men also have other men in their lives who are older wiser or have been through other situations so it's a combination of the and error and them also learning from what the other guys do trying it for themselves and then they figure out okay so if I sell her a dream I act like Prince Charming I say these particular things I love bum I can get what I want and then in their experience of actually getting what they want quickly they realize okay this is the technique that I stick with and whenever they want access to a woman they just use that same technique you understand what I mean right Molly said I'm in the situation now uh I don't know what uh to do I don't want to leave Molly your situation sounds like a perfect situation for the Discord so please go over into the Discord it's in the link in my bio on Tik Tok write out your entire situation because that's a that will be a I'll be able to give you a much more detailed answer there's no way you'd be able to get give me uh a detailed understanding of your situation to in this uh in in one sentence right so go on the Discord where you can type out paragraphs of your whole situation and I'll answer it in detail on the show okay uh manipulation gets the draws it's true it's true that's why this is called The Players Club that you can understand how to play the games that you want to play and um get to the places that you want to get to and for those of you who are scared of manipulation or think it's a bad thing or think it shouldn't have any place in our life or our world I'll be the first one to tell you that whether or not you believe in manipulation whether you think it's good or bad it will be existing since you before you and it will be existing much after you and you will be getting manipulated whether you realize it or not okay so if you choose not to take part in it if you choose not to acknowledge it if you choose not to utilize it fair enough but I guarantee you people will be manipulating you to get what they want out of you and you'll have no idea okay uh Sophie says do men genuinely love women as much as women love men uh yeah I think so I don't think that there's I don't think that there's anything you have to understand the fact that men will use and take advantage of some women has nothing to do with the fact that they can't love women it just has everything to do with the fact that if they want to fulfill a desire of getting access to Squirtle and they know that you'll give that to them without the commitment or um the effort or the consistency then they'll take it it's like it's like coming across someone on the street who is literally saying someone walk up to me and take my $1,000 out of my hand free of charge you understand what I'm saying saying eventually they just say oh well if you're not forcing me to do anything and work anything for this ,000 sure I'll just take it out of your hand for for for free it's $1,000 I can use $1,000 right so it's the same concept they just think to themselves I mean if you're not going to make me work for Squirtle make me have any commitment for it I'll just take advantage of you and take advantage of that right I know it sounds Grim but it's still like that's guys I'm sorry I'm not going to be the person to tell you that the world is actually sunshines and rainbows and we all Frolic in flower booms and hold hands and sing Kum I just can't sit here and talk to you about the world in that way as if that's where we actually live because it sounds good when you're hearing it right on a screen but when you go out into your real life you won't be able to utilize any of the information that we talk about because that's not the world we live in we don't live in a Utopia so me talking about how things should be doesn't actually help you deal with the real world that you live that's why a lot of what I say might sound harsh but at the end of the day that harshness is what's actually going to help you uh maneuver in the real world not in makeb believe land where all men treat women with respect like let's be so for real okay right um doing this he wants to CH he wants me to chase him and if I chase him it makes him uh run away exactly exactly right right uh that's what I I love the Lost uh we can't sit and lie to ourselves I 100% agree that's what I love the most you meant say I 100% agree right the less we lie to ourselves the more we take accountability for our own actions and figure out how we can change our situation that's how you change your situation that's why this is called The Players Club it's not just about playing games or anything like that what it's really about is playing life and getting out of life what you desire out of life you understand what I'm saying right being a player right requires you to have active participation where you're taking control of your destination rather than sitting back and saying I'm just going to allow life to happen to me woe is me where all my relationships end up tragic and sad and everyone leaves me in the dust we're not going to come here and you know talk to each other about how tragic and sad we are okay right uh Molly says sir when you going to answer me on Discord I just want to know the time and and thanks Molly keep in mind there are lots of other people people who are sitting in front of you in the Discord I know for you and your own personal situation you feel like it's the most important thing in the world but just keep in mind there's a cue so even though you asked your question on Discord there might be some people before you that get their qu that need also their question to be answered okay if you're here participating with us for multiple days right we we're here every weekday you'll definitely see your question answered but if you're only looking for your question to just be answered and then then you're never going to participate in the chat ever again then this probably isn't the place for you okay uh Yolanda says uh in the YouTube chat how to stay in in Elegance in an elegant way goodbye to such a man when we are tired of the breadcrumbs you don't have to you don't you don't owe him anything right you don't you don't owe him anything right you don't owe owe these guys any like I think sometimes you guys are so worried about like a man who doesn't treat you well trying to like properly tell him that you're over him when really that's all that's only the ego boost that you're talking like you only want the the ego hit of being able to say yeah I'm done with you forever I'm walking away from this when in reality like you don't even need to say anything you can actually just walk away if you don't feel like someone's treating you how they need to treat you just walk away and then if they ask you why you walked away you can choose whether you're not you want to tell them but like you don't need to explain to people why you walked away because they mistreated you they like these guys also aren't idiots like they can they know if they're mistreating you okay Melissa says how to do the inverse and hook the man is it by making him invest money okay this is the thing I'll say about the investing money thing and I've seen this come up a lot of times cuz I know a lot of you like to compare me to Shira him investing money in you is great and I love the stuff that Shir says I agree with most of it however I think that if you become hyperfocused I'm someone I always like to live life in a balance I think too much an an extreme of anything is not good if you become hyperfocused on him investing his money into you as a form of validation that you're in the right relationship or that he actually cares about you you will find yourself in a place where men can easily manipulate you by throwing money at you and you'll feel like you're having a real connection or growing a real relationship with someone who just has disposable income okay like I just want you guys to keep that in mind because remember the same things you're thinking about the guys also remember IAL about develop techniques the guys also grow an understanding of what you want and then their approach adjusts based on what they know you your desires are so remember I always talk to you guys about okay the guys sell you a dream because they know you've been watching your Disney Princess movies and you want to be like the Disney Princess so what do they present themselves as they present themselves as Prince Charming but now now that the culture is Shifting where the women are more concerned with oh does he have a lot of money does he drive a nice car can he take me to noou can you spend $11,000 on the date the men just say oh oh okay I see now you don't want Prince Charming that's not what you're looking for you're looking for a rich man to spend money on you that's your version of validation so they abandon selling you a dream and they just realize okay I'll just get a whole bunch of disposable income and now I take her on a nice fancy date she's convinced that we we have a real relationship cuz I spent $300 on the date she's taking Snaps telling her friends I get to utilize her in the first night second night second date whatever right and then I throw her to the Wayside and go get the next girl and all I had to do was throw some disposable income at her knowing that that would convince her that now she's validated now we have a relationship now this is what she's been looking for right this is why I say the techniques the men the men's techniques are chasing after your desires okay so they know they want access to you and your Squirtle they're just going to develop the techniques that make it easiest for them to do that so as your focus becomes more on money so does the men's Focus they just think I'll get rich I'll have disposable income I'll throw it at her cool I get access to her the same way it just cost me a little bit extra money right that's why that's that's why I always advise you guys to be very cautious of living on any extreme especially the extreme of I want him to invest money I want him to invest money and I want invest money invest money where's your money where's your money and that's all you're thinking about because then you stop focusing on anything else and then the guys realize huh you only care about investing money sure I'll play along with your game I'll invest money when in reality I'm just investing in that Squirtle and once I get it I'll be gone anyways so there'll be no more investing after that so what's the minimum spend for Squirtle basically that's what they start saying what's the minimum you know like how at the at at the club you have the minimum spend to get a table for for for for for bottle service right they'll start thinking to them what's the minimum spend here for Squirtle cuz I just want the absolute minimum spend and then after that I'm dipping so let me know you want me to invest money what's the minimum spend here let's get let's get to it the minim $300 date done minimum spend I got Squirtle all right get the hell out of here and you you're traumatized either way traumatized either way okay rayell said at least you got something out of it see my only problem when people say that right not single you out requel my only problem when people say that is so do you actually think that your mind body and soul is only worth a few hundred or a Chanel bag I hate to be that person that makes it super deeper than it actually needs to be but like that's really me like do you actually think that in return for the trauma of giving your mind body and soul to someone who just utilized you and threw you away that getting a bag or some money in return is actually a worthy match or some sort of even transaction even like even a comparable transaction you understand what I'm saying like I just I I don't like the idea of not single you out requell but I just don't like the idea idea of feeling like it's Justified somehow or it's any better because you ended up with something as if that would ever equate to Your Mind Body Soul and Spirit I'm a very spiritual person so I don't take that lightly you understand what I'm saying but that that's just me that's just me so I don't I don't that that that mindset that that bothers me you know right uh BB J says Shar doesn't encourage women to give their bodies just get the bag I I mean I mean to each his own that but I I still the reason I say be cautious with that is because even in the process of you getting the bag sometimes you get if you're too focused on it you get lost in it right and you that's the only thing you're thinking of and when you get to an extreme place you're only thinking of one thing your vision becomes so tunneled you can't see anything else that's where you leave blind spots to be manipulated by people okay just keep that in mind I'm not saying that she was wrong because I can't sit here and say oh I know everything about relationships guys do everything that I say no nobody else knows the answer to guys I'm just a single human being I could be absolutely wrong in everything I say I just think just be mindful just just something just something to think about okay let's hop into the Discord it's Discord time it's Discord time it's Discord time it's Friday and it's Discord time it's Discord time it's Discord it's Discord time it's Discord time time we're hopping into the Discord it's Discord time it's Discord time oh my God okay let's hop into the Discord here uh all right we got I told you guys we got tons of questions today uh okay uh Jonah let's start off with Jonah we got Jonah here number one in the Discord so Jonah says or I say joa joha not Jonah joha don't want to fall in love yet before advice okay interesting uh I have been on a six month I have been on six dates with a guy he schedules dates frequently but rarely communicates on text during the week not necessarily a bad thing he's he's using it as a scheduling tool as it should be used last time we saw each other I told him I like when a guy shows me interest and texts me or calls why why okay I know we we haven't finished this but side note guys I always tell you guys this is very bad do not encourage guys to text or call you more the only thing you need to be encouraging him to do more is plan more in-person dates with you you're not going to be in a relationship with the best texter or caller because now his Focus will be on being a great texter or caller that does not serve you okay keep him in a place where he feels rewarded right for taking you out and and scheduling dates with you that is what really matters so I know we haven't finished this yet but you're doing this backwards joha by encouraging I know that you want him to contact you 24/7 this also stops him from being able to miss you right and continue Desiring and anticipating the next time he will go on a date with you okay so this whole stuff about text you and call you more don't get off of that don't be worried about that keep him encouraged to take you out on more dates that's what you should be encouraging him to do so last time we saw each other uh I told him I like when a guy shows interest um and texts or calls me he started doing it this week but I feel it's forced I never initiate but I try welcoming when he texts I don't think he has told me what he is looking for I'm looking for a committed relationship how do I ask him without sounding desperate I want to set a standard so he knows that I'm not looking just looking for a hookup no pineapples has happened yet good good good good I also uh he told me he's been divorced for 2 years but his Facebook profile says he's married um that's really dependent on you know um how old he is and how often he uses Facebook some people don't really check that so I wouldn't read super deep into that um how do I make sure he is divorced and not just separated that's good that's good you're now you're asking questions that's good I I really like him and don't want to mess it up how do I enchant him I feel intimidated he is super intelligent what mindset uh uh should I have so he is not turned off by my lack of intelligence compared to his I try as to ask as many questions and listen to him but I have heard that if they talk a lot they will only see you as a friend uh but they want someone to listen to No No so if you talk less listen more and listen well he will actually like you more and he'll be able to project onto you any amazing qualities that he wants to project onto you um as it relates to this first half like I like I told you guys before do not do not encourage men to text and call you more right I'm not saying they you shouldn't encourage them to contact you but you don't want to get them in in the habit of focusing their attention on trying to be present with you over text and phone call because the men get easily tricked by this too it's not just you the men get easily tricked into feeling like they're spending time with you and talking to you over text and call and they become complacent and satisfied with the amount of access they have to you that they don't feel it's necessary to pursue going on real in-person dates anymore right it kills that hunger and desire to see you in person when they constantly have access to you over the phone you want to keep him starved of you over the phone that he will constantly be hungry for the next time he can see you in person that's how you get all these inperson dates that's how because at the like like I said guys you're not on dating apps to text people guys I'm I'm going to back out here look at me you are not trying to make pen pals with men stop this foolishness okay this is not your pen pal right a lot of you guys are falling into this pen pal trap cuz you just want someone easy and Casual to text absolute waste of your time stop doing that it's it's hurting your relationships and it's hurting your ability to grow real relationships okay stop doing that pen pal stuff right and stop encouraging men to be your pen pal all right this I know uh joha has her heart in the right place obviously she's asked questions cuz she wants her advice but this type of stuff is encouraging men to be your pen pal instead of doing what he was already think about this he was already doing what you needed him to do he was scheduling dates frequently that's all you need you don't need him to text you and call you a Bunch it doesn't matter he texts you and calls you when it's relevant to scheduling the next in-person date that's all you need because that's how you're going to grow a real relationship when you're actually with each other for 10 years and you're living together that's when you can call and text because you need to communicate throughout the day this stuff at the very beginning of the day you don't need that to better understand none of what he says to you over a call or text is going to actually grow your relationship or better help you understand him okay and at the end of the day you'll have a much better time preparing yourself for all the questions and how amazing the in-person conversation can be when you don't spend all this low quality time in between that texting and calling right I don't know if any of you guys have experienced this but if you text and call someone too much by the time you get in person sometimes you feel like you don't really have anything to talk about because everything you needed to talk about you talked about over the phone or over text and so you feel like uh well what's the point of me bringing this up or talking about this there's nothing really for us to catch up on and a lot of times the process of catching up with someone on what they've been doing what they've been up to can lead to more conversation and can take you to very interesting places and all of that stuff will make him feel like wow this is such a stimula stimulating conversation wow you're so interesting you're the one saying joa that you want to come across as more intelligent and so that he'll be more interested in you and never get bored with you well one of the ways is by making yourself scarce over the text that by the time he sees you you guys have so much to talk about so much to share so much of your life so much to to ask so much this and that by the time you every time you guys finish up a date he always feels like damn that that was 4 hours that just flew by and I don't even feel like we got to talk about anything there's so so much I want to talk about and that what that's what leads to every date for him feeling like he didn't fully get you as much as he wanted to get you right he leaves the date unsatisfied with how much he was able to see you and so does that do it triggers him to say okay I need to see her more I spent 4 hours with her that wasn't enough I need to see her again so the first thing he's doing when he gets home is he say please yo when are you free again we got to see each other yo next NE can you make it okay can we make it three days we just had a four I know it was a 4-Hour but come on man you don't let's go out somewhere we could go to a pic right and he's just feing feing that's what you want them you want them hungry right let him be in his masculine let him be hungry for for for you like just just keep it that desire like don't don't kill that desire for him by just a Snapchat 24/7 you're Snapchat in the side of your face you're Snapchatting your cat you know what I mean texting him all the time hey what you doing what's up oh what are you doing I'm eating eating what are you eating I'm taking a shower oh how long was your shower nice shower I'm going to the the gym oh send you some memes haha that was funny LOL like right all of that all of that stuff it just makes him sit back and go yeah she's cool she's chill right he doesn't feel that he starts to associate you with all the feelings he feels when he's in contact with you so when it's all this text Snapchat all the stuff that doesn't really mean anything he just starts to associate with you with it's just part of the day nothing really super amazing nothing really super bad it's just there just exists right you do not want him associating you with those feelings all right very bad okay I know I went on a Rand about that but that stuff gets me angry okay angry so my advice to you would be to let go of the text let go of the calling and keep him encouraged to see you in person do not even bother asking him to do more calling or text don't even address it actually go back on your word and say you actually really appreciate how much he does go out of his way to plan dates with you I want you to kill whatever you just did in terms of encouraging him to call and text you more I want you to destroy that by telling him how much you actually appreciate it instead that he'll take you out and and schedule dates with you that way he knows you do not expect that from him in the future you just expect him to continue doing what he's been doing okay uh eternal love says says advice on moving on okay Eternal Love's question is I'm 20 female you just made the cut I'm a 20 female I don't uh like to talk about my life as if I'm a victim but lately my life has been tough I used to be in a relationship with a guy who is also 20 he was my first boyfriend we met when we were 15 uh he was my emotional support during our relationship my mother was diagnosed with cancer so sorry to hear that but my boyfriend uh made me feel like I had a normal life my dad got a new job so uh we had to move to the US I was very sad about leaving my boyfriend but we promised we would remain together four months went by uh with long distance he was busy more often and rarely called me one day I told him how I felt and asked if I if he could call me more he got defensive and said that I could also call him and it didn't make sense that he had to call me always excuse me all of this conversation was on text oh God uh he turned everything around and made me feel guilty I said that if he couldn't resolve if if he couldn't resolve things we couldn't be together anymore he said I would never think about breaking up with you for a situation like this um his behavior wasn't something I could accept so we broke up uh and he never seemed to know why later I asked if I could call him uh but then he said he had an event with his friends and he had he said he only had 30 minutes to talk but preferred not to because he didn't want to be sad at the event I felt he didn't prioritize me so I blocked him um weren't you guys broken up uh his behavior so we broke up so we broke up why why were you expecting him to prioritize you when you broke up with him uh uh then my mom suggested that I should unblock him and tell him that we were breaking up for good so I did and occasions like my birthday he would reach out just to wish me a happy uh birthday one week after my mother passed well sorry um I was very vulnerable and reached out to him and thanked them thanked him for being there for me in the past he said he was happy to help me but didn't know if it was the best decision because he still had a lot of feelings for me okay uh I know that I should see uh seek seek therapy uh but I can't afford that I know there is people with more experience that could give me advice on how to move on okay that's actually a great question uh eternal love I think that in your situation I don't think that you're a bad person for reaching out back to him for someone who was actually really there for you during a really tough time and I understand why you did that you know in a time when you were vulnerable and things like that um but you also have to part of maturing is realizing that not every relationship is going to be forever and that's fine um it's painful that realization but it's the reality and you know having him there to help you through the situation while that is something that you definitely can appreciate and remember for the rest of your life that doesn't necessarily mean that your romantic relationship has to work out simply because he was there for you and for a lot of people including myself but for a lot of people you know long distance just doesn't work and I talk to you guys about this obviously I talk to you guys more about long distance as it relates to just being a pen pal but when you've known someone and you go from being in a no distance relationship with them to a long distance it can be very painful and if both parties aren't really truly invested in really making it work not just like okay we'll see how we feel throughout this long distance it's it's got to be like okay you're moving let's figure out the next time I'm going to see you in person like we've got to literally be you've got to be so Hands-On with the scheduling of the next time you guys are going to see each other because then it becomes a very weird limbo where each of you just kind of feel like okay we're doing long distance but for how long and you kind of just feel like like where is this meant to go are we just going to be long distance forever and those questions start to create doubt in both of your minds and if that's not addressed properly by understanding no we're still in a relationship and we're still going to spend time together actually the next time we're going to see each other is this date at this time what happens is if you don't have that anticipation to be able to build or look forward to it just starts to go downhill as each day passes right because each individual starts thinking to thems well I'm not really seeing my person yeah I get to talk to them on the phone or text but what is there to look forward to and as there begins to as each person begins to feel like there's less and less to look forward to each individual day the luster and excitement of the relationship and the other person slowly Fades after a while unfortunately and it's only something you can really know once you've experienced it um which is why I can talk about it in detail so eternal love my advice to you would be to accept the fact that you guys had a relationship he was there for you but that doesn't necessarily mean you have to continue having a relationship simply because he was there for you and it's okay if the distance that was created through you moving ended up hurting the relationship and it's just not something that's going to work out unless there's a there's a way that you can actually see him in person regularly like when I say regularly I just mean like you know like act like in some realistic fashion and you're 20 so you don't really have that much control over where you live and you know um maybe you don't have the funds to be able to be taking trips there and him taking trips to you and so you might like you might just be in a place where the best thing for you to do is the is accept uh your reality for what it is and be okay with that it's not it's not the end I know when you're 20 years old it feels like the end of the world but it's not okay just let each day pass and as each day passes each day will become slightly easier and to the point where you'll realize that was an experience but you know eventually my life goes on okay uh Holly said wow we have so many uh this was Len leaks I think this was a reply from Len leaks yeah that was a reply keys I also believe is a reply yep Keys is a reply um you guys still with me on in the Tik Tok chat I just want to make sure you guys are still with me okay uh Keys was also a rep this was a response uh yes we did this one a while ago um baby bliss this was a response sorry guys I'm just going through cuz some of them pop up back onto the feed even if they're just someone's response from an old one yeah these are some of these are old so I just want to clear them out and make sure everyone gets a chance to get their question answered he's so busy we did hers as well Blossom okay this is a new one oh I see it says new discord's so smart it says new whenever it's new uh on and off uh and sudden foreign longdistance relationship okay the wow okay this should be interesting buckle up guys buckle up uh Blossom says Hi We are in our mid 20s and have known each other since the end of high school back when we started dating and had it going for 5 months uh then back when we started dating and had it going on for 5 months then we ended things because uh when we were separated after a few days he started dating a classmate he went out with and told his was his friend am I missing something back when we start he had going for 5 months okay we separated after so after a few days he started dating his his classmate okay okay um that same summer he split with her and we didn't talk all summer we both started to go to different colleges and time went on and after about 9 months I decided to uh ask how he was single all the time he replied to me uh and since then we were on and off for like 3 years then we broke it off because he was talking to other girls and all our interactions felt like a situationship and I really didn't enjoy that then for two more more years he went working uh abroad uh last year he returned from work abroad and continued to study also texted other girls but after a a half a year of him being back I woke up to a text uh from him asking how I'm doing and after some talk he asked me out what that's so Random I agree you agreed I agreed thinking he grew up and on the meeting day he said that he won't be able to come oh like asking you out as in asking you like just out on a date I thought you meant asking him to be his girlfriend I was like what uh and I also had other plans few days later wished him happy holidays just to have no response after the holidays found out he just got into a longdistance relationship with a girl from a game he plays what do you mean from a game he plays like he's a sports player uh and she lives in a whole different country across the world they met after uh holidays in January and he paid for an Airbnb to meet her in the how would you have all this information he paid for an Airbnb to meet her in another country for a week and have pine where would you get this information from okay uh then she made and posted a couple Tik toks in that A&B and then he came back put their Couple pick in in his profile picture added her to friends and families and socials and sends and post with uh her with flowers every month also she asked you just want to torture yourself huh you're watching all this um also already has tickets bought to go to her uh country to spend with July with her how do you have this information Blossom how would you get the receive you are doing some expert level FBI stuff which this is not a good use of your time and energy um but still checks up on me back when he didn't respond to my text and saw he was pursuing her I deleted my text and made some hints for him to know that I also can switch up quick would appreciate your opin my opinion Blossom Blossom Blossom I don't want to be mean to you you need to get over this and get over yourself what I mean by get over yourself not trying to be mean but this man does not want you like I I don't like like he doesn't want to make you his girlfriend okay like he he's he's not going to treat you how he treated the other girl and actually it's kind of sad how like the like this like all of this information this this entire paragraph here like this is actually really sad like this is really tragic like the fact that you would even have any of this information means you've been doing research on research on research on Research this is not healthy for you like like your think about this like you've invested this much time and energy into someone else's life when all of this time and energy you've been spending uh invested into what he's doing and what she's receiving from him could have been spent on yourself okay I guarantee you this girl that he flew across the country for and got an Airbnb for she probably doesn't even know your name you know why because her man probably never speaks of you imagine that your invested in the whole life of a woman who has no idea who you are but you know where she's been you know what she looks like you know what her name is you know you know the last time she saw her man you know how many flowers she got you know what their F like you know you this is insane this is insane you know what her future plans are for the tickets he bought to go to her country in July okay like that's not healthy okay this isn't even stuff like this is gone on on on like Joe of of from the TV show you levels like you're you don't just know what they're doing currently you know what they're about to do in the next couple of months like you need to pull your you need to get a grip Blossom this is not to diss you you need to get a grip because you're losing it the deeper you go down this Rabbit Hole of being invested in what he's got going on he clearly doesn't really care for you or want anything to do with you cool you guys had a little fling you know early on high school days you got you had a little situationship for the 3 years clearly he didn't take it as seriously as he takes this girl in his new relationship so I think your best bet is to just accept the fact that you weren't the girl that was going to inspire that treatment from him and actually figure out what it was that you might have done or said that made that so because I doubt it's that you were an unattractive girl cuz he messed with you for 3 years so there probably was some things about your approach that I don't know you okay I may be wrong but there might be some things about your approach that could lead you to getting a man to chase you instead of getting him to go to another girl and give him everything that you seem to be wanting okay this type of stuff doesn't happen by accident this is where I tell you guys I'm not saying this to offend you but this type of stuff doesn't happen by accident if it's not that she's such a better more attractive woman than you then girls some girls getting this chasing princess treatment versus some girls not getting this is actually a function of your approach okay and what this tells me is that if you're doing this much stalking of what they're doing you're you're probably leaning closer into the world of I really need your attention and validation which is why you end up doing this and it for some of us listen trust me I get it I've have lots of friends I've heard people talk about this before as well I think you're in a Perpetual cycle of you almost enjoy the pain of let me know guys if you if this makes no sense or if if it makes sense I I think Blossom you're in a little bit of a cycle where you almost enjoy the pain of going there and seeing him do that with her and kind of almost like putting yourself in pain about this situation almost like as a way to degrade yourself right because for you to know that he's doing this with this other girl and then continue to like pry and like you have so many different things details about things that he's done with her and for like you're talking about he buys her flowers every month that means you're checking up on what they're doing consistently to see like like like that is not healthy and that that that's that you're just you're just putting yourself in constant pain to the point where it almost sounds like you're doing it on purpose that you will be hurt and feel worse about yourself right and I don't want that for you and I think the best thing for you to do is to block him him and her on everything that you're not tempted to look at any of their stuff anymore because it doesn't serve you what's they're they're think about this they're happy in their relationship and you're sitting here hurting about a man who doesn't think of you and a girl who has no idea who you are that is that is absolute lunacy okay and you can't be like that forever you will be in so much pain and you'll never be able to build any real relationships with anyone else when you're sitting here gawking and being sad over a guy who doesn't even think of you like that's so sad Blossom okay don't do this to yourself block them on everything and do not look back please okay that was blossoms uh next we have Miss St Louis oh miss St Louis's been in the been in the Tik Tok chat wow she transitioned into the Discord she's got a question okay Miss I hope Miss St Louis still here um Miss St Louis says uh so I've been putting the the phone down like you advised and not been so available and been hearing from him less uh because of it not sure if this is a good or a bad thing what do you think he was giving me penp pal energy now I don't know what it's giving okay I'll tell you miss St Louis I hope you're still here miss St Louis I'll tell you exactly what that is okay and and this is the this is the painful realization that a lot of you will come to if you take my advice like Miss St Louis did okay the realization that some of you are going to have is that after you begin contacting him less and being less available to him on the phone you'll come to the realization that the only reason you guys were in constant communication was actually because you were the one doing the pursuing okay what I mean by that is once you stopped reaching out you guys stopped having conversation because he never was actually reaching out to him to you right it was really more of a function of how much you were pursuing him that the moment you let your foot off the gas he actually had no interest in pursuing you in the first place and so he showed that by not contacting you as much back or in general right and this is why it's such a great strategy because it entices the men who are already actually genuinely interested in you to take a step forward and then the men who actually didn't have that genuine interest in you they end up I don't even want to say taking a step back you end up just actually seeing the trees for what it is right and realizing that he never had any intention of really pursuing you or chasing you or being with you which just shows you that he wasn't really ever interested in you and so miss St Louis in your specific situation if you stop reaching out to a guy and you put the phone down and all of a sudden you're hearing from him less that's because he was never truly that interested you in you in the first place in which case he was probably using you to get something out of you or simply because you were the one pursuing him some guys are willing to take your Squirtle because you're willing to pursue actually this is Miss St Louis this was a perfect this was a perfect show for you how men bait you into chasing them because you don't you might you might be in this exact situation where because of the things he's been doing you didn't even realize how you were the one pursuing him and you were so blinded by that by that now that you actually took a step back you realize oh my God there's no conversation if I don't strike the conversation he doesn't have any intention of going out with me he doesn't have any intention of uh uh building a relationship with me I was literally offering him Squirtle I was literally offering myself to him for free and simply because it was free and easy and accessible that was the only reason we were spending any time together and so that sometimes can be the painful realization that some of us have after you put the phone down okay um I see Miss St Louis is in the chat so um I'm glad you were able to get my live reaction to the question but at least now you have the information you can you can better move forward okay uh next we have m m says uh provider uh my provider thinks he's the prize I'm not sure what you mean by provider do you mean like a like a rich man that just gives you things my provider thinks he's the or is this like a kinky thing I can't can I even say that on Tik talk okay my provider thinks he's the prize you guys got to let me know I don't know I don't know if this is like a like a like a dirty thing my provider thinks he's a prize and any advice to flip the script I'm already going out alone during this week he says have fun you guys have to let me know what provider I'm not sure what that relationship means my provider thinks he's the prize you you like you guys got to let me know what that means uh he's proving Financial stability so like he's like a trick a man who tricks on you okay a money man all right um so he thinks he's the prize cuz he's giving you money I mean okay and you're saying how to flip the script so I'm confused what are you trying to flip the script on if he's a provider and if if it's based on what uh uh the girls are saying in the chat that this is a rich man that's G to you know give you money what are you trying to flip the script on he's giving you money like are are you saying that you're trying to turn a guy who's tricking on you to like actually genuinely like you that's why I'm a little bit confused here okay Gabby says uh she wants him to chase her and stop acting arrogant towards her well how arrogant can he really be if he's providing money like and is it really arrogant for him to say have fun that she wants to go out alone I I'm I'm I'm confused here I'm confused here like cuz this just sounds like an ego thing but I'm confused what do you if you're if okay this is my confusion here M if you're considering him a provider like if that's how you're speaking of him then that speaks to what what you're receiving from him and what you're there for so then I'm confused why you call him a provider and then you're asking to flip the script as if you want him to be genuinely interested in you as if that affects his ability to provide for you I'm confused that way because if he's someone you're genuinely interested in why do you refer to him as a provider if you were genuinely interested in man and you just actually wanted to flip the script so that he would like you more wouldn't you be referring to him as like the man you're dating or you're trying to you know like you're in in a talking stage with that's the only reason I'm confused is because if he's a trick then why do you care about flipping the script if he he's literally saying he'll if he's continuing to provide and you can go and do whatever you want while he provides what's the lose there like you're catching feelings for the man who's tricking on you I'm confused isn't that what you came there for in the beginning I think I think em you need to clarify because I think there's too many questions here went in with money expectations now she likes him I mean I guess but still that's an assumption and this is why it's so important guys you got to be detailed with your questions cuz I'm not really sure EX what Em wants from this specific situation or what her actual status is because that's just confusing to me you know if you're the my thing is if she caught feelings now then why are you still referring to him as the provider you know and then if he is if he was that but now it's transition then you got to specify that in the message right cuz now I'm making assumptions of what it is based on that okay I see m is typing there maybe we'll come back to that after M uh clears some of that up cuz um I'm a bit confused still uh I want to get this name right and Elina and Elina says rejection then coming back and Elina says so so first I was on a birthday party then he asked me on a date after I wrote him then he asked me on a date after then he asked me on date after date I wrote him like hi why are you not right in what and he was like we are on different Road I am old guys you need to spell check your uh questions I am on different Road I am old 30 I am 20 I need a family and kids and he does not think we can build something serious and something unserious I am probably not interested three months what three months later he wrote me if I want to cinema we went a movie okay I'm not doing this I'm not doing this if you have a question please put it in narrative form and make it make sense I have no idea what this question is even asking but he said nothing like there's no context this makes no sense okay like you got to make this make this make sense and Elena no no offense to you but like this makes no sense I can't grasp what it is you're trying to say or the question you're trying to ask okay if you okay perfect if you're not an English speaker and you find it hard to express your words in English you can always go down to the uh General the the the voice Channel if you really want and um we can stream your question in the voice Channel just got got to let me know if you want to do that okay cuz I can't there's there's no way I can understand what's being said here I don't think anyone in the chat can understand you okay no no offense to you anela uh let's see here uh so Rose says mistake met this guy on a dating app been a couple of uh been on a couple dates uh and gave him him P Pineapples uh too when we slept over at his place on different weekends 24 hours each spend he wants to schedule a date but to sleep at his place afterwards how do I not sleep at his place Rose you've already made the mistake I I'm confused if you've been listening to me for any period of time why why are you still on the dating apps let's assume that maybe you've only met me since after you've met this guy you gave him the pineapples you said you've only been on a couple of dates so let's assume in the first two dates okay I'm confused what you want from him now why would you sleep with him so early if you want him to take you seriously I just I'm I know some of you might be new here but I just I'm trying I'm trying to help you guys see how the logic does not make sense you want to allow the man to be able to respect you and take you seriously you are not allowing him to take you seriously when you do stuff like this and now you're doubling back after you've already done it and you're trying to figure out how to not sleep at his place like what like what do you mean what's your expectation now are you expecting him to take you seriously now cuz he's not he's not okay you know I told you guys about a quote that my friend that my friend posted on his close friend story the other day and that really resonated with me the quote went the the quote went liking sleeping with a girl who you really like on the first date is like unal living your dog I'll I'll say the quote again the quote goes sleeping with a girl that you really like on the first date is is like unal living your dog that was the quote and I'm so serious and it actually resonated with me and it's like resonates with a lot of guys right because there's nothing there's no easier way to destroy the hunger and desire that we feel as men for a girl we're really interested in than to sleep with her right away because all of that hunger and desire just poof vanishes into thin air right and it all just becomes pointless and useless and I say that because it's it's the same thing here right regardless of how he felt about you when you guys first met sleeping with you in the first couple of dates is only going to destroy his hunger and desire for you so now I'm confused Rose what do you want and expect from the relationship like why are you expecting like see and and this is the thing you look like an idiot if you go over to his place talking about we're not going to sleep together when you slept with him on the first couple of dates you see how you just make you make yourself look like an idiot and you also make yourself look like someone who can't be taken serious right so even when you set a boundary what you think he's going to take that boundary serious when you say we're not sleeping together after you slept with him on the first couple of days he's going to be like you're literally a joke you're a joke he's going to laugh in your face but you deserve that because of how you're acting your actions have to back up your words you can't think going to set boundaries and have high standards while not having high standards nobody's going to believe you so honestly my advice to you is you might have to do a whole 180 to like show him that you not that girl like you might if you really want to do this right you might have to stop texting him you might have to give him all types of anxiety make him feel like he lost you like his schlong ain't schling like you know like you got to make him just go on the opposite go on the offense cuz right now where it's looking for you he there's no reason for him to have no respect for you like why would he like let's be served let's be so for real why would he and anything you if you go over to his place anything you say about we're not sleeping together we're not doing that he's going to laugh in your face you're a joke to him now so you don't be trying to set standards now and expectations now after you done already showed him you don't have too much standards or expectations guys don't be doing this stuff backwards you'll end up like rose we all make mistakes obviously but you'll end up in the same situation as Rose where people ain't going to respect people going to laugh in your face when you try to demand respect after they see you don't have no standards for yourself okay don't be putting yourself in that type of situation all right you you going to have to do a 180 no contact no nothing and if he stops reaching out to you then you know where you stand with him okay M I think gave some more context to our situation M says provider means bread winner and he's not a trick okay this totally changes everything okay I don't like that he thinks he's a prize I'm the prize okay so this is just an ego thing okay so but what are you saying is it bothering you the fact that see listen M you might have to just reconvene come back next week and add all the context that's needed to be added because there's still a lot of questions here cool he's the bread winner so you're saying you're in a relationship with this man because if you're in a relationship with this man and you say you're going out during the week and he says have fun that's totally different context from being in a situationship with a guy and you're single and you say you're going out you can't expect him to say no don't go out you're single but don't go out that's unrealistic and crazy right um so that needs to be clarified you're saying bread provider as in Brad winner are you married are you in a relationship how long have you been in a relationship like I said if your boyfriend's sing you can go out okay cool that may be there may be something to that right and I also don't know under what context is it coming under I'm going out alone what does that mean going out alone where doing what you could be going out to the grocery store right what what does that mean do you live together that totally changes the context if you're going out alone do you not live together are you long distance right em you got to provide me you see how the format of everyone else's question was em how they gave me an explanation of backstory on the relationship what they've been through how old they are how long the relationship's been going on right all of that stuff is required in um the uh the the uh question so that I can have full context sh says can she ask her question by voice option yeah 100% she can she can if she really wants to we can do that okay um but that might have to be a next week thing so we can set that up properly for her uh oh I think uh and Elina redid her question okay uh okay thank you for redoing your question initially I intended a his birthday celebration uh elici I attended his birthday celebration and subsequently he invited oh now all of a sudden you using big words okay so I know this was you were just bsing this you using big words now so you know how you know how to type the thing out right uh initially I attended his birthday celebration and subsequently he invited me uh on a date after our date I reached out to him with a message inquiring why we hadn't been in touch his response IND what what happened now you're a scholar now you're a scholar analina what was this BS message you sent before now a sudden you a scholar using big words and stuff his response indic this must be from Chad GPT this chat GPT um his response indicated that our paths were diverging this is CH gvt it's got to be he he mentioned his age of 30 in contrast to my I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry it's just I would I I wouldn't I wouldn't be laughing if it wasn't for the fact that this one made no sense and now of a sudden this is like a it seems like you typed in the chat gbt write out this sentence at like a you know like a university uh essay level you know what I mean in contrast to my 20 years expressing his desire for a family uh and children he doubted the possibility of building a serious relationship and he believed I wouldn't be interested in anything less serious okay 3 months later he contacted me suggesting we go to the cinema we saw a film about a man trying to win back a woman yet the uh yet after the movie he remains silent about the nature of our relationship now it must be more understandable sorry the question is what was his intentions okay ana um that's funny this must be a chat chbt response like because the way you just went from someone said ESL college professor I just don't understand you using you using words like subsequently trust me I'd be using big words too but it's just funny because to just do that right after the other the other message is just funny the contrast here um so so uh yeah so you're 30 you're 20 um I I think I think in your specific situation uh obviously you said he's expressing his desire for a family and children um I think his expression for family and children you're taking that as well you must be interested in me now um and I and I actually think this anxiety that you're expressing through uh this uh message is probably projecting outwardly in you know when he's seeing you you attended his birthday celebration and he invited you on one date okay so you guys had one date after your date you reached out that's a mistake you he invited you out on a date he was chasing you this is the problem some of you get anxious because oh my God a boy likes me oh my God a boy likes me oh my God a boy showing me attention and now you need this to be ongoing forever and continue being extreme and if he doesn't show you attention 24/7 now you're you're wallowing in the mud and I think this happened to you analina because he invited you on one date okay and now you're reaching out to him don't why why he he took you out on a date and on top of that you're inquiring why he hadn't been in touch that's horrible all that communicates to him subconsciously is that you're so desperate that if I take you out on a date I'm so magnetic and magnificent and amazing that after I take you out on a date you will literally be like oh my God I have nothing else to do in my life my life is tragic and boring and uneventful if you're not taking me out on are talking to me so why haven't you reached back out to me I've been sitting here in my dark room on my bed waiting for you to text me again waiting for you to call me again waiting for you to make my life interesting because my life is a pile of heaping dog poop that nothing is happening unless you can bestow upon me your interesting Magnetic Personality and bring life to my otherwise Bor boring uninteresting life okay that's what you're subconsciously communicating to him by doing this reaching back out to him and why haven't you been in touch why haven't you texted me whoa are you sitting around waiting for me to text you right that all indicates to him yeah if you're doing that he then thinks you must not have a lot of value because a woman who has a lot of value that has a bunch of guys knocking down her door trying to get access to her is not worried about a guy messaging her back after he takes her out on a date get in line let's hope that you can get a second date after all these other guys are begging for time in my schedule it shouldn't be I was waiting for you to text me again why haven't you reached out you just sound desperate and you sound like you have nothing going for yourself and so guys aren't attracted to that he might hang out with you uh for the sake of knowing that oh can probably use her I can probably take advantage of her right cuz you're desperate right you've you've shown him that you're desperate um he said that he was his your paths were diverging if he actually said that he just he literally took that out of a Shakespeare book and just copy and pasted copy and pasta on to you okay uh literally means nothing that's just words paths were diverging I promise you if he had his dream grow right in front of you there would be no paths diverging actually all his paths would be leading to being inside her so let's get for real here he just doesn't want you he's just trying to tell you a whole bunch of nothing you're 20 years old so he probably thinks you'll buy that as well so um yeah uh he contacted you going to none of this means anything except he realizes he can take advantage of you and utilize you how he wants to utilize you I don't think he has any intention of actually building a relationship with you especially since you showing yourself off to be desperate right so my advice to you would be to pull all the way back and stop stop trying stop trying literally and phys and figuratively stop trying to gain his attention Okay because the more you are anxious for his attention for him to reach out and try to be with you more and more try to see you more and more it's only going to make him see you less it's only going to want make him want you less it's going to make him only more uninterested in you you don't need to be in you're 20 years old you should be you should be operating under the under the understanding that you are the hottest Young thing around there is it is a privilege to be in your presence as a young hot 20-year-old this chasing after him as if you literally have no life is unattractive and he's not going to want to make you his wife if you he can't respect you all right uh that was it for [Music] today okay so um for those of you let me see here that was just a response here okay um yeah so for those of you guys who uh have questions make sure you go and ask it into the Discord well I'll answer all your questions obviously we're going to do those on Monday I won't be here on Saturday we we are here Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday or Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday during the week at 400 p.m. eastern time so I'll be back again to have an amazing conversation with you guys at 400 p.m. eastern time on Monday uh until then I will be posting some great amazing stuff on my YouTube channel as well as I'm going to do one exclusive like one that's not a live show that's just an exclusive on the YouTube main page you got to come catch me on there I'm posting Lots on lots of great stuff on there if you want to follow me on Instagram you can go ahead follow me on Instagram it's sitting right above my head you can just go and copy it on Instagram and you can follow me see everything I'm doing throughout the weekend I like to work out I like to lift weights like a man like a man okay so you might just see me doing that on there as well okay um uh if you want to catch this live stream again you love it so much you're like this is my first time here I can't believe this even happens I can't believe this show is even existing I need something like this for the rest of my life you can go find the show the live show in its entirety on my YouTube it's right above my head just type in my name on YouTube and you'll find the the show you go in the live section you'll find all the shows that I've done from obviously from today and from all the past live shows and the amazing part is you'll have the Tik Tok chat embedded in the live show and the YouTube chat as well so you'll be able to follow all the conversation that's been happening even those of you on Tik Tok okay um so it's really amazing with the username and the pictures and everything it's awesome it's awesome technology is awesome um so make sure you go on to my YouTube And subscribe and and and watch that all right I will see you guys on Monday and for those of you who come and watch my videos on YouTube all the time you'll hear from me again on Saturday I love you so much I can't wait to spend more amazing awesome time with you on Monday 4 P p.m. eastern time we'll be back again