[Applause] what saw the racket for what was over brother peace broke out ni we just won a war prime minister now it appears we've lost its greatest heroine lost track of her mom for the time being well where is she I understand the Lord mayor was arranging a parade Royal fusers she was last seen entering a Convent of nuns in bansy nuns Catholic nuns yes momam are we still in England I thought you knew the family I do highly respected people and yet their daughter I would say she was always unusual [Applause] mom bu [Music] next [Music] TR [Music] [Music] a [Music] [Applause] [Music] the [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] yes [Music] [Music] a Miss Florence hello wson help help one dark lonely night on crimea's Dre Shore there was Bloodshed and fighting the morning before PA the dead and the dying like bleeding around some crying for help help but none could be found what we is a miracle a human mirac we need someone to help us where we to make us well we don't want to die so we need is a miracle a miracle down here right [Music] [Applause] now then God sent his Angel to sucker the brave 10,000 she saved from an untimely grain the wounded by L as it can be seen she's the Soldier's preserver they call her their Queen hello Queeny what we got for [Music] human we [Music] got made us well [Music] our what a mirle a miracle here right now [Applause] rest rest and more rest thank you Doctor you know what the call iner the solders preserver who calls her that all sorts Mom it's from a song really song about Florence oh my poor Brave little girl come come my dear my beloved mother and father how they fought to keep me at home fought all my plans and dreams for myself but now that I'm a national heroine how proud they are they even call me brave brave brave for doing my duty the soldiers they were the brave ones lying there strapped down while their shattered legs were hacked off and no chlori form for the lower ranks I'm still in a rage about it still there the tree the little bench the garden where all my troubles first began then if scripture is to be believed isn't a garden where all our troubles first began oh so young I was innocent no thoughts of war or dis Seas my only struggle how to escape from a life that was poisoning me with vanity and social expectations but one day something happened that changed me forever I remember sunlight so bright too bright then a voice really a voice I was being asked no I was being told in no uncertain terms that my life belonged to God that that he had work for me to do yes Lord let me think of thy will only of thy will let me serve you you [Music] alone but how could I I had to admit God's message was sadly lacking in details what exactly was I to do all I knew was that I was being stifled no food for my head no food for my heart slowly dying in a diet of triviality I prayed God show me a way out teach me tell me And yet when he did it last and I answered the call oh the things I saw no rest for me now then not till the truth is told to all listen to this an American has written a poem about the war everyone's writing poems about the war dear well this one's all the rage apparently whenever a noble deed is wrought when air is spoken a noble thought Lo in that house of misery a lady with a lamp I see she passes through the glimmering Gloom and flits and flits from room to room flits I doubt if our Florence has ever flitted in her life well Mr Henry wodsworth Long Fellow she does so who are we to argue oh are you all right Lawrence what are you doing downstairs stop if anyone ask me any more questions I'll buy a revolver and shoot them while anyone accept the queen what are they saying now Mr long fellow's written a poem about you an entire Army murdered what's being done about it absolutely nothing well we should have to see about that I need some a Florence no not outside you'll catch your death of cold at least wear a coat my dear papa always the skeptic never sure about anything though years ago when I was struggling to discover God's will for me he did at least try to understand my pain and help me Flo I wish if only if only I could be satisfied with the life that satisfies you I can't be but you make it so hard for yourself when I heard my call I didn't hear it would be easy your call Papa you've never believed in it not for a minute have you well I I thought not you don't know what struggle is and so we continued to observe our uneasy truth J if I see how turkey can stand up for itself my mother played Hostess to the powerful and well connected and I the dutiful daughter attended of the men talk Politics the woman Tau husbands house last week I hear the B is forbidden all over Russia one frequent guest was Sydney Herbert a rising star in Parliament he sympathized with my hopes and dreams in years to come I would often turn to him for help back then though my thoughts were all taken up with matters of the heart i' read that speech of your cityne exciting stuff but don't you think there might be case for compromise I mean the Ottoman Empire what your point sir my point is that the sick man of Europe may be past curing isn't the real point that thear is a brutal Tyrant and we have to stand up to tyranny wherever we find it even at home quite so nicely put anyway I do believe that we're on a drift of War well I was talking to paliston the other day at our club about it he's full bored at facing down the ruskies bit behind time what's this it's young M Mills become quite a regular visitor it's useful actually you can set your watch by him he's not that young he's practically [Music] middle-aged do you know what happened on this day 5 years ago no should I we'd all been invited to the bottom Carters your sister recited a poem you played the piano Something New by Mr shopan badly I'm sure oh yes rather badly I'm afraid and because of my poor performance that day must go down in history oh dear no on that day we talked for the first time really talked I mean and you said something I've never forgotten that if only people knew what a young girl is thinking while she's playing the piano or busy embroidering do you remember if only people knew she was actually imagining extraordinary adventures with someone by her side whom she had chosen as a loving and loved companion in life yes it's true I did say that [Music] Florence you must know by now that everything you believe in everything you hold dear I do [Music] too rich I look at me [Music] please do you think today the two of them perhaps [Music] you well Florence nothing what do you mean nothing he proposed I said no Florence no wait do you realize what you've done yes saved myself from a life of slavery oh my goodness Florence how could you I just couldn't is that so hard to believe you have kept that man dangling for 5 years he understood he understood perfectly better than you and you did exactly the same thing with the Nicholson boy and now our families rarely speak to one another would you kindly excuse me please look at this look at it can any reasonable person want all this the linen the the China the 56 pots of jam well if everyone is to entertain properly and to be treated like a piece of furniture nailed to an existence where you talk about nothing but who's going to dinner what happened she said no to Richard yes she called it slavery slavery but Flo you know you could have done anything you like with the poor man look at Mama and the way she manages our dear papa why half the time he has no idea whaty that will be quite enough Florence you know I never asked you to be anyone's slave I have been very indulgent I'm sure my mother never considered what I thought the least you can do in common courtesy is to listen to me I'll go out and I'll find work oh my dear young lady I will think of me as your son your Vagabond son I won't cost you a penny isn't that good mother marriage is so expensive imagine the savings I know what you have in mind this absurd notion of becoming a nurse which I will never agree to is God's way for me don't bring God into this again it has nothing to do with him and you know it I will not allow you to disgrace yourself emptying slop buckets living at the beckon call of letterers and drunks have you any idea what goes on in hospitals no woman of character would ever Yes dear Fanny my love the Colonel's just leaving what shall I say to him tell him there's no tyranny like the petty tyranny of a good English family she said no to Richard why does she have to spoil everything you have to speak to that girl when yes after that everything changed dismayed but resigned my parents gave in and I set about acquiring the largest hospital experience man or woman ever had in truth I lost Richard but I gained my freedom and yet I confess if I were to see him again even now I don't understand it I'm ashamed to understand it but not one day has passed without my thinking of him hello are you all right it's nothing I'm over at the crummy and fever I mean I was quite ill guess who's here Sydney he just arrived from Westminster he has news really I knew he'd get the government C Sense nothing nothing at all my dear the British public has had quite enough of the Crimean catastrophe it's over no no no it's it's only just begun that the catastrophe I mean with our silence you must help me Sydney you absolutely must you always have and you can do it again I know you can otherwise everything we've been through these past two years would have been for nothing Florence I'm no longer a minister at War just a plain old humble Member of Parliament making occasional speeches very fine occasional speeches Sydney if I may say so I brought you this you don't have to bring me presents just tell me Justice will be done um may I see Sir John Hall for instance that miserable excuse for a military surgeon has he been Court Marshal stripped of his command no entered a monastery perhaps to do some well-deserved Penance not quite Blackboard from his Club at least he's been given a kcb a kcb which stands for night of the Crimean burial Grand flow what a beautiful bro it ever done isn't it but see who it is from in appreciation of her Service Victoria Her Majesty will be in Balmoral next week she wants to meet you and to talk I believe she may even be inclined to listen now this is important for the queen is very interested in the fate of the army you must remember she thinks of it as her Army that's the way to engage her interest do you follow me do try to be tactful Florence don't say anything that might upset her majesty nothing about without maggots and wounds and Frostbite and limbs falling off [Applause] please you love to see the queen today oh do be care for what you say or you will quickly be excused Her Majesty is not amused by story set to shock and scare so listen to mother and please beware we don't want to hear about maggots we'd rather not learn about lies just make everything pretty and jolly and happy and nice we don't want to hear a soldier swear or listen to moaning and screams we don't want to hear a single cck to bother Her Majesty's [Music] dreams be sure never to tell her about all the blood and the gore surely you know it's not right or polite to make a queen paint on the floor she's happy to hear a daring deed for Soldier your colel or tough but never not ever no never discuss fingers that keep falling off the heads that keep falling off the legs that keep falling off the headset keep falling off cuz everything keeps falling [Applause] [Music] [Applause] off may I offer you some tea dear thank you Mom please continue yes ma'am we we lost 10,000 men in 6 months mostly through gross incompetence and I came home to find that many of the officers responsible had been promoted given honors medals titles crimes were committed terrible suffering inflicted that could easily have been avoided yes yes Miss NY G but what exactly entitles you to be the judge of that I studied and visited all the hospitals in London Dublin Edinburgh Paris Roman berin I was twice in training with the Protestant deaconesses at the Kaiser worth Institute in Germany I spent one year as superintendent of a Harley Street nursing home I personally scrubbed floors of sick rooms emptied bed pans I nursed color patients whose whole bodies were a mass of thank you and your parents permitted all of this they they came to understand that I had a calling that this has truly been God's will for me I see and what is it you suggest we do about these crimes as you call them a royal commission mom a royal commission nothing less than a royal commission will suffice to bring out the truth it is our sacred duty to the crime and dead and if I may your majesty it is also a heavenscent opportunity to reform the entire Hospital System Of The Nation not just of the army beg your pardon mom of your army forgive me Mom it has been a lifelong dream of mine we shall think about it remarkable woman I wish we had her at the war office I'll convey that sentiment to the minister Mom good oh and as to that Commission yes momam I seriously doubt whether it's in the best interest may I finish mom we do want our brave Soldiers to receive the very best care please see to it the commission the commission prime minister a difficult meeting I'm afraid the queen was somewhat taken aback by your proposal yes a royal commission that could have consequences ramifications well I had and you were quite forceful you know well I'm sorry but however I did Prevail upon her majesty to change her mind and she has graciously agreed to allow the commission to go forward under my supervision thank you my Lord thank you thank you very much yes I well remember one evening at the ver is when you were very eloquent on the subject of Nursing and so forth a worthy cause now one minor detail of course I would like you to submit your evidence to me in the form of a report a confidential report there are susceptibilities to be considered are we agreed yes agreed good give my regards to your Charming mother I hope to have the pleasure of seeing you at the deers next weekend I'm afraid you won't see me I'll be writing my report excellent to work [Music] [Music] then sweet room ready waiting for you uh please if there's anything that you need anything at all they want a report for me do they then they shall have it this room should be my War office my family always stay here when we come to London the fine old Burlington Hotel this room is ample and compared with my lodgings in the Crimea utter luxury but how could I sleep in Comfort when so many of my children lie in unmarked Graves I call them my children those ordinary soldiers who died in pain and silence uncomplaining though the officers called them brutes the scum of the earth my children what a tale I have to tell how eager and proud they all were when they first set out the very names of those regiments made our hearts beat faster the Royal drons the Grenadier guards the 93rs the inis Gillings the Cold Stream guards the Raw fers off they went with their brand new rifles and pretty sparkling uniforms off to teach the Russian be lesson the finest army in the world we thought Invincible we thought back home in a month we thought everybody let's hear it for our brave British Boys in British [Applause] uniforms I believe it is it oh no it isn't oh yes it is you're right it's a lightning frightening fighting Light [Music] [Applause] Brigade theorious Bri the r of Bri Glory Queen and Country to [Applause] fighting afraid the Glorious Bri the r Brigade you never SE like us before char F me fighting Light Brigade never [Music] afraid an army that had spent more time on the parade ground than on the battlefield commanded by a Dear Old Gentleman whose last Taste of action was waterl 40 years before this Force incredibly due to the heroism of the common Soldier won three battles against huge odds but the cost and those blundering generals I know this much if any woman had managed her kitchen the way our generals managed that campaign she and her entire family would have been reduced to the PO house in weeks as it was the British army was reduced to a regiment of living skeletons dressed in rags crawling with Vermin and if they were wounded or got sick worse was waiting a Death House in the shape of the military hospital that's scutari the casualties mounted and the death rate soared thousands died of disease and neglect but the soldiers were writing home and the London Times sent out its best reporter before long the appalling truth was known in every English parlor only then did we begin to understand the full horror of what our men were going through listen to this it is with feelings of anger and surprise that the public will learn that no preparations have been made to care for our wounded in the Crimea not only are the not sufficient surgeons there's not even linen to make bandages arriving at the hospital they lie in their own waist covered by a single blanket eating meat raw stiff with salt or rotten with maggots not over breakfast dear please let me [Applause] see excuse me mother at last I knew what I must do all my training could now be put to use but I needed an ally so I wrote to my dear old friend Sydney Herbert now a powerful member of the war cabinet as it happened a letter from him crossed with mine in the post Dear Miss Nightingale I have recently been receiving letters from ladies offering to go out to the Crimea and give Medical Care to our injured troops I know of only one person in England capable of organizing and directing such a scheme yourself I suggest that you start interviewing likely candidates as soon as possible well I wrote back immediately Dear Mr Herbert I've already begun which was only partly untrue I started the next day only to discover that while many called themselves nurses few were fit to be Chosen and why do you feel yourself qualified well when I read about it in the newspapers I cried buckets and buckets and buckets well I just thought of those poor poor boys how they must Miss A Woman's Touch pardon I never did mind hard work and I'm not easily shocked I just do do my best and carry on well I won't deny that the money will come in useful I take it we do get paid God how much how old um just turned 17 I think it's me back I'm in knes they're not what they used to be you know at our Convent in buray we see every kind of disease and deformity you're a Catholic order I believe we make it our business to save the body first then and only then do we attend to the soul if that's what concerns you we leave in a week how many can you [Applause] bring War ain't no place for a woman it's only a place for man this we fight from andat when so come here to inter with the British batt War ain't no place for a woman for a for [Applause] a if War's no place for a woman it's hardly a place for a man we'll ride the wave and try to save as many as we can we're n and nures your we'll rescue you from Pain and fear we'll bring you comfort and good Che we've come to hold your hands War ain't no place for a woman it's really a masculine game so when some females moving it's simply not the same just when the fun is starting you come with your ribs and curls our only needs to Great Deeds are not being Bute from a gang of twittering tiing spping whipping [Laughter] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] we landed in Turkey just as Autumn gave way to Winter my final choice of nurses were a mixed Brigade requiring much drilling some experience some less so some happy just to be paid some there out of pure charity and love of God follow me step Lively mind where you put your feet we had expected chaos but nothing had prepared us for those Barracks at scutari help me here just across a narrow strip of from Constantinople the British High command had established the nearest thing I'd ever seen to Hell on Earth it was in fact the main hospital for receiving the casualties from the [Music] Crimea it was there I met Sir John Hall chief medical officer for the British Army in the East hor new chori the lower ranks Mr Davis let us hear the man ball lustily at least then we'll is still alive fine carry on [Music] sir ah Miss Nightingale I had heard you were coming and from what I've seen so far not a moment too soon maybe so and maybe not as I read the instructions from your friend the right honorable Sydney Herbert you are under the clear direction of the medical staff here that means that neither you nor any of your ladies will do anything without the express written permission of a military doctor in other words Miss Nightingale here in my Hospital you are in charge of nothing with the exception of your personal laundry am I clear but do let us know when you need help see to them do we have to give them rations sir certainly not this [Music] way the quarters we were herded into were squalled and cramped alive with Furman the air heavy with the stench of fever and [Music] death oh so that's where he went been missing for a day or two sorry about that ladies we'll uh have it removed forth with first the strongest of you to the washtubs everyone else let us have those floor swept the windows cleaned that stove working where are the brooms brooms that's a joke find brooms if you can't find them make them that night we went to bed in the dark the next day we cleaned out our new home and then then nothing it was as if we had been sealed up in our dingy little corner frozen out by Sir John Hall and his doctors deliberately forgotten was this why we had traveled all across Europe we knew how much we were needed and we knew the difference we could make this was the cruelest trial of all to wait to have to listen to the screams of the sick and dying was almost past endurance but I knew those gentlemen officers they saw as as twittering Society do good is in search of a fevered brow to mop or a manly hand to hold as a brave Soldier slipped off to his maker bless our dear little hearts they certainly did not want some well-connected female nuisance giving instructions to their orderly but I'd grown up with Ministers of the realm and titled bigwigs sitting at our dinner table I knew the little games I knew the rules and I knew how to win so we [Music] waited what is it big battle incoming casualties they're coming in a lot so John says can you follow me [Music] [Music] a that was the moment of Victory we were liberated set free to do what we had trained for and had come to do but after Victory comes Counterattack in the shape of a system seemingly designed to create confusion the officials in charge of supplies I soon discovered were masters of red tape experts and obfuscation and delay I was clearly marked out as the enemy I needed allies and I knew of only two sources I could rely on the good Lord who never left me through all my trials and his chief angel of Mercy my old friend Sydney Herbert Dear Mr Herbert the supply officers fixed their attention on the correctness of their bookkeeping as the primary object of life last week we had run out of bread soap carrots puses and many other necessities I went to the supply officer and asked him are you was he expecting these things from England no he said are you doing anything about purchasing them no he said can they be had in the local town they if they can I don't know how to get them was his answer so Mr Herbert I went out myself and I bought them with my own money in short I'm now a general dealer in socks shirts knives and forks cabbage and carrots the water is not boiled the the cooking is done by drunken so I must refer again to the deficiency of knives and forks here the men tear their food like animals will you send us 1,000 mops 3,000 tin plates I go about making the orderes empty huge tubs of human waste mortality is frightful 30 in the last 24 hours in this house Christmas Day 1854 the state of the troops who return here is frostbitten starved ragged no wonder they die in the hundreds no washing has been performed for the men neither of body linen nor of bed linen except by ourselves the consequences of this are fever I shall endure I shall not break my heart of disappointment at the total inefficiency of the hospital system here I shall bear it willingly I was called to do this work and I will fight on for God and for the right for they are worth fighting for I now see clearly what must be done if these conditions are happening here they are happening elsewhere I have written a plan for the systematic reorganization of these hospitals please make sure Mr Herbert that it reaches is the highest levels of the government I have more and more reason to believe that these hospitals are the kingdom of hell but I fervently believe they can be made into the kingom of get some sleep I don't know how your body keeps going why doesn't this silly thing here let me thank you rever m and my body is strong it's my spirit I get so discouraged how could even Jesus not be how did he persist he was the love of God incarnate he could love the good even in the worst good Jesus loves Sir John Hall when he forbids him in chloroform if Sir John Hall sins I believe the sacrifice of Jesus can redeem it sometimes I think I expect too much from God well he is God Almighty Florence and not your private secretary I suppose not if you were I'd say send more bed pant Lord can't get around it Florence God is in charge not you time for Rounds they love you you know those soldiers then I'm Most Blessed spring came and so did the government inspectors sent out after Sydney Herbert spoke to the right people and gradually we began to have something that looked more like a real Hospital staffed by nurses who had disciplined and professional but those poor fellows who died in front of her eyes that first winter they will not let me rest until I tell the world of all they suffered who is it just a moment the wonderful doct far a member of my unofficial War cabinet he brings me such Charming gifts sets of figures allly tabulated pardon me do I intrude no do far come in no work today Miss Nightingale yes of course I have to go out but I'll be back in an hour what have you got for me uh some uh very interesting comparative death rates excellent will you write up a PR him a Dr far we'll look it over when I get back meanwhile you can wish me luck luck why where are you going into battle I know what you're thinking here comes that bothering woman again oh no not at all the ful interlude in my all too humdrum day then like all good interludes I should be brief I come on behalf of the Crimean dead I yes the Royal commission which still has not met and has not even received your signature prime minister indeed yes well you must understand there are how shall I put it I know susceptibilities tell me my Lord in oranda do you mean to shelv it shelv it to silence me to shut me up Miss Nightingale you must understand that this is the start of the grous shooting season yes of course those poor Birds the point is my dear that all the important people are leaving town I understand then perhaps with so many people at leisure now would be a good time to publish my own Narrative of the Crimean campaign I believe correct me if I'm wrong we agreed your report would be confidential indeed we did and once it is fully commissioned and I hand it over to you it will be until that happy moment I believe I have complete Liberty and Mr Russell of the times has already expressed such an interest in a firsthand account of my Crimean experiences good day my Lord ah how in the battle I think we won oh brilliant um by the way you might want to look at my prey the mortality rates in each regiment relative to the percentage let me see are you sure you're not too tired I'm never tired when I see a column of numbers are you sure these figures are correct yes of course then we must go over them every single one pass me that book and the figures you gave me [Music] [Music] yesterday so there's no doubt sta is tell us facts not who is to blame for them I am to blame no I'm sure you did your best it was not enough Dr far Florence my dear young girl do you realize what you just did the papers for the Royal commission will be signed tomorrow I have it on the best Authority well done Flo and guess who will be chairman what [Music] what my poor man who endured so patiently I've been such a bad mother to you God God why have you forsaken me Flo guilty how can you say that because I am guilty as charged nonsense my dear there's absolutely no proof no proof scari last January mortality from disease 576 per thousand at the front same four weeks mortality from disease only 17,000 that's scari a 25% greater chance of death from diseases of the stomach and Bs Flo please please these are just figures just figures I murdered those men come come everybody knows you saved lives all that soup you made all the knives and forks you procured Forks that first winter a nurse came to me and said there are some beds the men won't lying they call them bad luck beds whoever goes to sleep in them doesn't wake up again nonsense I said wash the sheets dress the wounds feed the men and they'll get better it turned out they were right the whole hospital was built over a lake of sewage which of course was then cleaned out too late why me ignorance exhaustion from my fights with doctors arrogance I was God's own handmade wasn't I so of course I knew best but you had absolutely no Authority no but I had Sydney Herbert in London at the center of power I wrote him every week and not once did I ask for help with sanitation I asked for pillows it took a government commission four months later to flush out the sewers do you know what they found when they dug out the channel that brought us our drinking water a dead horse and all the time I was saying send your patients here we'll take care of them we're professionals we're nurses they should never have listened to me they should have stayed away my poor children it's over you did your duty nothing more to be done now yes there is what tell the truth if that means I'm to be crucified with other murderers like Sir John Hall on either side of me isn't that the traditional way and what exactly will that achieve Flo Flo please child think carefully Martyrs seldom leave anything behind them but their ious better a useless martyr than a cowardly [Music] [Music] deserter I drust you slept well is it morning yes and Lord paliston is expecting your report is that it yes all done it is finished Let It Go I trust you found Miss nightingale's report of use GE extraordinary most valuable so you will present it to the commission Florence one must consider the public mood exactly the nation wants to move on and let us not forget our Queen n the whole of Her Majesty's government are dedicated to reform but for reform we must look to the Future and not fight old battles Florence well put Sydney if I were to publish my own report ah but there is that confidentiality Clause besides the public would not stand for the loss of one of their greatest heroins it would set back the cause for those very reforms you and our gracious queen so earnestly desire you do look tired Florence so much work it drains the system after two years fretting about the health of our army isn't it time you took care of your own [Music] down here right now then God sent his Angel to sucker the brave 10,000 she saved from an untimely grave the wounded the lover as it can be seen she's a soldier's preserver they call her their Queen hello Queeny what we got was a [Music] miracle lady when all El fail who made us not to worry ladies and gentlemen now she will be fine look there's tendance around her now no stay where you are she will be all right she's placed worse things in this now she'll be all right now please keep your seats keep your seats St look she's coming around already Ru BR Brit rules the waves Britain never never never shall be SL [Music] [Music] rules that is heartening news prime minister yes M thank you and when does this Commission of ours expect to start hearing evidence next week I believe and will miss Nightingale appear before it ah no it was decided to submit her evidence in writing through me I see and how is the dear girl somewhat indisposed Mom after her Herculean efforts I believe she's taking the waters in morvin Spa tell her we wish her a speedy recovery I'll convey that sentiment to her father when I see him next excuse me excuse me excuse not to be disturbed where's my daughter especially by her family I will have to see my daughter I've been told she hasn't eaten for a week we can't exactly force her to eat you didn't even call a doctor I'm sure she's fine Sir Mr nising CL Florence Flo I'm aware that we need to talk we haven't always done that have we I'm also aware that there have been times in my life when I've been too distant too much in my books my thoughts but you know I always loved you don't you yes papa yes I do and yet in a way I feel I was always little afraid of you you of me well you were but are so independent so headstrong well I had to be didn't I yes of course you know I had Ambitions too politics William Edward Nightingale MP I thought that had a nice ring to it better than good old when decent chat but not much good at getting the vote out well I wasn't a be I've been left behind in the race a lot of races whereas you you on the other hand Papa I'm sure if there's a House of Commons in the next life you'll be a member I am perhaps that my real calling in life was to be your teacher when you were little except you see one can be wrong about one's calling oh flow be patient with yourself haven't I always said that the world needs Pioneers yes many times and you are just such a Pioneer but if you're a Pioneer and you lead others into a swamp into death how can you not blame yourself what if it's all part of a plan what is the mistakes soone God called me he called me to make mistakes but you don't believe in my call do you I believe in you my little genius no you think the call was just my own voice don't you nothing more well I think once I did but now I what oh does it matter it matters to me what I think yes Father then I think that you are human and that God is God and he teaches us all through our mistakes and all we common mortals can do is work through trial and error for my errors I'm now on trial and what about Jesus what do you mean I heard you in the church when you were praying when you thought you were alone my God why hast Thou forsaken me I meant I once felt so close to God and now I know and I meant that you are not the first to feel that despair yet when you look back on it that suffering led to great good but I'm not Christ precisely Flo let God be the judge he's in charge not [Music] you come on [Music] well my dear what now do you know if I had my health I think I should like to see what's going on in our English [Music] hospitals [Music] [Applause] [Music]