Identifying the Right Person for a Lifelong Romantic Relationship

Key Considerations

1. Decision, Not Discovery

   • It's a choice you make, not something you stumble upon.

2. Personality Similarity

   • Similarity in key traits is beneficial:
     • Conscientiousness: Both should be moderately conscientious; extremes cause friction.
     • Agreeableness: Mismatches can lead to perceptions of cruelty or being a pushover.
     • Extroversion: Differences can lead to conflicting social desires.
   • Exception: Neuroticism
     • It’s advisable for a high-neuroticism individual to partner with a low-neuroticism individual to balance emotional stability.

Sexual Attraction

• Essential element; difficult to force or will into existence.

Trust and Goals

1. Trust: Fundamental for a strong relationship.
2. Shared Activities: Common interests that can form part of your life together.
3. Aligned Goals: Especially important in careers and decisions about children.
4. Economic Resource Management: Ability to agree on or negotiate financial matters.

Negotiation Skills

• Crucial for Resolving Conflicts
• Continuous process and essential for long-term success.

Practical Perspective

• Timeliness: Life is short, and choices must be made.
• Real Relationships: Even the best require continual effort, trust, and negotiation. There's no