no wonder why I was having anxiety no wonder why I was in severe depression especially when the breakups happened I was living in sin it led to death and so people think oh no I'm I'm suffering mentally yeah because you're living in habitual sin and you think it's going to be hard I don't even have an appetite for those things anymore truthfully of course things get hard and and yes I will I still I'm living in the flesh of course I have moments but my appetite has changed changed it's it's he has done it's miraculous what the word does does God give you challenges oh I probably have more challenges now than I did before but I think that as our faith grows our challenges get bigger absolutely yeah they do work yes it's not easy to pick up your cross and carry it that's right [Music] yeah I'm sitting here with Angela and Ari hi hi guys hi thank you for having us to so excited to be here with you isn't it so nice already you are the easiest person to talk to ever beautiful calming energy I feel like I'm with my family right now it's so nice oh that's nice oh that's good so I'll ask you those kind of family questions then I love it oh yeah get deep that's right I want the best for you I want the best for for you oh okay than uhuh and I want uh I I'd like to pray first yes oh we love a good prayer yeah absolutely yeah do you guys want to do you have a prayer that you prefer do you start with a prayer we always pray we do yeah but we could no no no pray pray a prayer I would love to here okay that's good y God thank you so much thank you Lord thank you for everything thank you for these Divine appointments where you bring your children together to do things in your name name God we lift up the name of Jesus we glorify you to the highest and to the fullest we ask God that you speak through us may we decrease so that you may increase and whatever you have on your heart God I ask that you put it on our hearts and that you orchestrate this conversation to flow with wisdom and with knowledge and with power and with healing words and with delivering words that will save us and the people listening God just be involved in everything we do may your will be done and may the son be glorified in Jesus name I pray amen amen amen amen amen thank you of course that's a good beginning so you have a podcast first of all I'd like to ask how did you choose girls gone Bible and did that come before you started the podcast or after you started the podcast when did that yes so we actually we went into the studio it was this studio we went in for the first time uhhuh and it was my friend's studio and Ari and I walked in not even knowing that we were going to film a podcast oh we just knew that Jesus saved our lives and healed our minds and we needed to tell people so we were like let's go start a YouTube channel and talk about God and then so we walked in and the guy was like no no this is a podcast and you need to this is how it's going to go and he taught us everything and I had the idea of calling it girls gone God which was like a play on Girls Gone Wild I just had this idea from the very beginning and then we're in there and me and Arya are both saying it's going to be girls gone God we even said it in the first episode we finish and then our producer goes why not girls gone Bible cuz it rhymes with wild and we were like that's it and it was like it stuck ever since then oh and how long ago was that now we just hit a year yeah our year anniversary congratulations thank you so much so much weekly podcasts yeah and how many subscribers do you have because I never know these I never pay attention to these things but I have to ask you I don't know why I know I love it um I think probably like 470,000 right now yeah just about wow I don't know is not amazing none of this well everybody no but there's people listening yeah yeah yeah and why do you think they're listening I think that Ari and I have been just so unbelievably vulnerable and and real and raw from the very beginning the first day that we started you have you if you watch our first episode to our last week's episode you see the most miraculous transformation in us and I think that people felt safe with us from the beginning because we're not pastor's kids we didn't grow up in the church we didn't grow up with rules and and adhering to the word of God we have lived a very secular worldly sinful life at times and we were so honest with that and we're like we're just having these like God is revealing Jesus to us in the moment and then we're coming on 10 minutes later to tell you guys about it and it's like they're on this journey with us right right yeah we I we couldn't there was a mo when I went through a hard time I couldn't put up the facade anymore and I was like and after when I filmed the first episode because when we filmed the first episode I had just started reading the Bible so I didn't feel equipped for this at all but luckily I have my best friend who held my hand through it all but we we got our first message from a girl was like I almost like took my life and you guys just saved me and so I was like buckle up because this is all we need to do is just share our hearts and the struggles we've been through and that's carried us through yeah and I think that people need Jesus in a way that they can digest and in a way that's real and I think that for the longest time um people have been approaching Christianity through maybe fear mongering and just and just shame a lot of Shame and being like and everything is so hush hush everybody struggles what we've noticed the most in the Christian Community is that everybody struggles even the most godly people high in high positions in the church they struggle but they're not open about it and then so people can't relate to that so I think people just feel safe with us cuz we come on every day and we're like God we're just trying to figure it out just like everybody else why do you think they struggle so much even people who are devout like that why do you think they struggle in their lives as well because we have flesh we live in a fallen world and our flesh and the spirit are at war against each other constantly and I think it's a lifelong battle that we face is living by the spirit which leads to peace and life as opposed to living by the flesh with which leads to death yeah I also find that past sins revisit it that's absolutely right abely yeah so so you said that you know you came in and you didn't feel prepared can you give my listeners a a synopsis of of how before you came to the podcast your life before and and kind of how you got there yeah well growing up I didn't I didn't know God I I would didn't grow up in a household of faith um and so the way I grew up was I grew up in a lot of Chaos I I had a a beautiful mother a lovely mother but she was really tormented by her thoughts and her anxiety and her depression and so I had that's what I watched so that's what I thought I was always going to be and I thought and I was told well it's only going to get worse for from here for you so I struggled immensely with anxiety and depression and the and the tormented thoughts and so I also watched a lot of addiction and so what I watched I always thought well I I just want I want to be the exact opposite of this I want to be better and so I moved out at a very young age and I worked really hard and I got into the entertainment industry at just 17 and I was always just chasing for this sense of freedom and peace and I couldn't find it so I put my identity into my career and in a man to feel safe and to feel whole but it always left me feeling so broken and after covid in 2021 I had I had basically lost everything I had no money I lost my career the the man that I I trusted so much that I put my safety into I would say um after 4 years he decided to to leave and so um I was just I could not put up a front anymore and I broke in a way that I it was I was almost dead but somehow still alive like I could I was disassociated I almost didn't make it I was so severely depressed and I tried everything I tried every therapist my family couldn't get through to me and I was barely hanging on and and one day I I went into this little catholic church by my house and I I walked in I fell to my knees and I just I don't even remember what I said I just remember crying out that I need help because I was so desperate you hadn't been in that church before no oh no I saw it and had you been in a church yes yes I God had been chasing me for for a long time and planting seeds but I was too I was too focused on everything else so what he took away was the biggest blessing of my life he had to take those things away from me to back me in a corner to say whoa the I can't go to these things so it I ran to him and in that moment that peace that I had been searching for my whole life was in that moment in that church when I was crying out to him it was like apparent that love that I had never felt growing up and I remember leaving the church and I I still how long were you in there I was in there for about 5 hours oh my goodness and was there anyone else in there no one was in there but when I I had felt such an over after that day I left I was still very reluctant but it was the only place where I felt a sense of relief so I would go in there and I would just lay in the pews for hours and just talk to him and that was the only time I felt peace and I'll never forget it I I had been praying Lord I I need someone like I was in such an isolation season no one was understanding what I was going through because I was like I think I just found God and no one understood because I didn't have any godly people in my life and so I would be laying down in the pews just like holding myself crying and I'll never forget it there was a um there was this nun her name was sister an MH and I'm praying I'm said please I just I need I need some relief and she came and sat next to me and she just put her arm around me and she said come with me and she ended up praying with me and helping me and I would go to church every Tuesday and we were the only two in there and she just she was such a from the grace of God he brought her but then I had been really just praying for a Godly friend and one day I had been at a job and I was in the corner I had a really hard day and I just was kind of crying in in my hands and I was all of a sudden I had felt somebody take my hand and it was her oh did you know each other no no oh no and so I was just like and and so she took my hand nipples me snipples yeah and I um I said she looked at me she and I I swear in the moment I thought of my cuz at the time I had been praying for for a friend right wow and she looked at me and she was like Hey I don't know who you are but we're going to get through this together good I I tell you sometimes like God Is So strategic the way he works and he brought her into my life because I couldn't fully submit I couldn't fully let go and surrender so he brought her well we're we're two or more gathered God is there right in in his name so yeah we and we don't if we grow up in addiction we don't know that we have to find other people wow we don't know that yeah yeah she didn't know that I didn't no and she just I I I'll never forget it on our we just had started becoming friends and she the thing about Angela is she met me at my very lowest and I think that's you know that's when you know someone loves you she looked at me like a sunshine in my lowest and so I felt so comfortable she made me feel so comfortable just being my friend and I was like I I think I might need medication like I am just I don't know what to do and she's said give me a month we're going to start reading the Bible oh that's when my life changed when she she sat with me every single morning and and we would read a chapter and she would explain every chapter to me and she was she was so gracious and patient with me she held my hand and you listened and I listened you listened yeah well that's something that's not done in our culture anymore people aren't listening yeah so that's good that's good that's a good thing that that's a gift that's a that's a Holy Gift to listen yeah yeah cuz you can learn if you listen yeah yeah she's been the biggest gift to me in my life I mean really friendship having friendships is is so important so important someone you know I made decisions on my own when I was in my 20s based on that I left my family home not knowing not understanding what was going on there so I left thinking I wouldn't come back and wouldn't take anything with me and then and I isolated myself even though I had friends and stuff I didn't let in anything that needed nurturing and so you weren't so this was the first nurturing that you were letting in oh yeah yeah oh yeah mhm she man she's been such a gift to me really okay let's go to Angela then and tell me a little bit about your s yeah and then we'll come to this point again yeah oh I love I just I love that story I can't wait to talk more about because like you said listening Ari had the most willing and obedient heart you ready right she was she was willing she was willing like a child is and that's why God was able to move in her life the way that he did it's beautiful it is um so I similar to Ari I grew up Catholic and I had a mom full of Faith she's the most wonderful woman in the world she loves Jesus but I grew up um as a very rebellious child I rebelled against my parents and God and teachers and just any any sort of authority I wanted nothing to do with it and I got got to a point when I was and so I was always in and out of my relationship with Jesus I loved him but I didn't fear him so he didn't the love that I had for him didn't affect the way in which I lived my life at all I had no um awareness of sin I had no awareness of conviction I was just like Jesus loves me and he died for me and I'm going to do whatever I want cuz that Grace will cover me right you know and I didn't read the Bible and so I didn't know that you know you can't go on living in sin and really call yourself a friend of God and so when I was you said something earlier about Sin and about how it will like reappear in your life and I think the sin that I even committed as like a teenager I started drinking when I was 14 years old it was really normal in the culture that I was in to start drinking at a very young age and so and it's funny cuz Ari grew up in addiction and then she went the opposite way I grew up with parents who've never touched a drug in their life and um did weren't drinkers at all and alcohol became something that was always a part of my life it was always there's the spirit behind alcohol was always after me and so when I got into my 20s I developed severe panic disorder severe 24 hours a day Tammy living in constant fear with no relief all day long I couldn't drive a car I couldn't go on a fourth floor balcony because I was afraid of heights yeah intrusive thoughts disassociating the level of anxiety that I was dealing with was so traumatic that I started to disassociate as a way to like my mind wanted to protect itself derealization depersonalization I'm separating from myself and my surroundings I would look at my family and I could barely recognize them sometimes I was living in this war in my head and it was so miserable and the only place that I found relief was in alcohol again so the thing that had me when I was younger came back again later and it was the only thing that made me feel better so then I started drinking but socially acceptable drinking and we live in a culture where alcohol is not only um acceptable but it's pushed on you and it's weird if you don't drink and so during this time I wasn't doing anything worse than my peers but but I always knew that my relationship to alcohol was different than other people's because people could have a few drinks and then go home whereas I wanted to go all night and I would notice that the next day after drinking everyone would be ready to just go have some breakfast and get on with their day but for some reason I wanted to keep drinking oh really even in the morning I could feel something it was there's I have an allergy to alcohol where it simply affects me differently than it would a normal person and so I get to the point where now I start self-medicating with alcohol and I enter into the darkest and most depressing time of my life so in order to deal with the hangover drink more absolutely yeah it was this NeverEnding cycle I was about 22 when that binge drinking cycle began oh dear and by the time I was 23 it got to such a point where I and I hit it for a long time and that's the thing about addiction is like did you live alone no I didn't I lived in a house full of people and I was able to hide it even my own even my own mother I mean everybody else drink too they but they didn't know to the extent that I was drinking they didn't know that I got to the point where why did you hide it why do you think you hide HIIT it because if anybody around me knew that I would start shaking if I went a few hours without drinking you know what I mean right somebody would intervene and I didn't want anybody to intervene I wasn't ready I was I was so comfortable in my addiction I was so comfortable in my misery and I didn't want anyone to disturb the only thing that I knew right right and so I guess fair enough you know yeah I mean but that's the Bible is so clear that like you must you must confess to your brothers and sisters whatever sin is in your life so that we can pray for each other and be there for each other otherwise your sin and your addiction and your your depression and mental health struggles fester and feed off of itself in secret and so I get to the point where my drinking is so out of hand that I am now a slave to alcohol completely a Slave at 23 years old just a kid yeah so lost trying to figure out my life I couldn't tell anyone how much the day were you drinking for like the whole day morning tonight yeah oh yeah yeah every couple hours I see always with those little alcohol bottles I see um and then it got to the point where I was met with an ultimatum by the guy that I was seeing I was he was the per only person close enough to me and close enough proximity that he could see something was wrong and he gave me an ultimatum and God just met me in that moment I I literally in that moment came face to face with God of him being like here is the one person in the world who loves you more than anyone he doesn't even want anything to do with you if you continue doing this oh I see and in that moment the Stars aligned and I guess I can go a little bit backwards I was visiting a Catholic Church as well every single day balling my eyes out I would go into one of those little side rooms and I was balling my eyes out begging God please Jesus heal me from this the alcohol the anxiety the depression the intrusive thoughts this war that's in my mind that I don't want to be in my own mind unless it's Numb by something I don't feel safe in here you know and an accumulation of these prayers and I was opening up to a close family friend of mine who was also praying for me and my mom was praying and God and I met in a moment and I put the drink down I didn't pick it up again that was four years ago okay and praise God praise God damn praise God yeah really there's no other way there's no other way she didn't go to AA or anything literally is a exactly he is my sponsor he the next year though was so traumatic on my brain um my body was trying to like reac acclimate and like self-regulate and now I didn't have my vice so I'm facing all first I'm facing all the turmoil from the damage I've done to my body with the alcohol and and then I'm facing all the anxiety that I've been numbing for the past 2 years I was then fully disassociated for a little while just in the desert right I was so deep in the wilderness Tammy but over time through prayer and reading the Bible which is the healing word of God how often did you read the Bible during the day every single day once all day once I listen to sermons almost all day all the content that I consume is uh the word of God based you know and so that was that's what brought true healing into my life and prayer how long did that take about a year for full he about a year to notice real effects of being like I have journal entries where I I'm I start writing um I I was like writing what I was grateful for so you were journaling mm and I was writing what I was grateful for and I would write I'm grateful that I didn't disassociate today right and that was about a year after I stopped drinking oh my goodness what a trial hey what a trial huh you know it's hard to believe I know what we are the card the cards were dealt yeah and the challenges but the healing that can come the healing that can come after that can be extraordinary yeah it's miraculous really is it's real so do you imagine you both feel that way that you've had miraculous recovery oh miraculous I feel that way I know you have and yours is physical yeah mine's very physical I have very physical symptoms some people have psychological symptoms other people in my family have very psychological mine's all physical yeah yeah it's all pH an attack yeah it seems like it I've been I told you I hurt my back before I hurt my back I had something else I can't remember what it was but it knocked me out and before that I had something else that knocked me out so for the last year it's just been one thing after the next and I'm like what's going on like what what's happening and I think uh because I'm new new to this and and giving Service uh it's disrupting something yeah in the status quo maybe I don't know I don't know but it might be that'd be good wouldn't it you and your family all disrupt the St status quo let's disrupt the status quo in a way that serves God you better you better buckle up for the attack that's going to be on you and your whole family and it's only yeah it's it's been on is it really since 2019 I guess a little bit before that but definitely 2019 I believe it yeah but we're doing pretty good now and you guys are doing pretty good yeah we are I mean there is no every single illness infirmity disease or mental health struggle bows to the name of Jesus period yeah um but that doesn't mean that the attacks won't come they will no and and we have a past and we have a past and we have to atone for our past right people don't like to talk about atoning but we have to because there's no choice it's going to come right absolutely are you feeling like you're are you still atoning or are you is it coming your direction the atonement or or are you finding your way further and further into the light I think that we I Think Jesus atoned for our sins once and for all for us and so the atonement for our sins came through the blood of Jesus thank God because we would never be able to atone for our countless amount of sins but I do think that the consequences of sin are often times lifelong and then I think we also deal with the consequences of our parents sin and their parents generational yeah there's generational curses and and and patterns that have to be broken looks that way are you finding that yeah but that's what that's the power of prayer yeah I mean we are covered in prayer her and I and we we we constantly we say we break generation I have so many generational curses I see it the way my mom's mom was and so I refuse I break it I break this generation we we pray about it and and I and you know I don't the other thing I do too is with mental illness it's like people feel like they're bound to it they make it their identity you know I see it in my family well this is just who I am it's in my bloodline well guess what no it isn't because what I thought I was was a part of me is completely healed and I'm saying that so confidently I mean you have no idea what God went into my mind and did I am made new and and I and I read a lot in the Bible about like you know how Jesus healed so many people with it's called evil spirits right and what is that that we're in a spiritual war and people are making it no well no this is mental illness well no half the battle is it's it's it's it's we're in it's spiritual yeah you know and and and so I'm just a huge advocate of being like listen guys like I'm looking around there's more medication than ever right now but why is everyone so mentally ill more than ever mhm you know it's because they're relying on medications they're saying well I'm mentally ill so they're just that's their identity yeah physically ill too and and also relying on medication yes but we forget the power of Jesus who healed blind people who who who is a Healer and a redeemer and if we can just open our hearts and say hey Jesus I need your help that's all I did that's all it took was he there is nothing that Jesus loves more than dependency and rawness and humility and that Purity and a humble heart and that's all yeah a humble heart and just that's all I did I I swear I didn't know what to say all I knew is I needed him and when I realize that we have a not a father who loves us so much who is there for us who will never leave us nor forsake us I live my life in peace now because I know he's got me and he really from the bottom of my heart you don't understand understand he healed me does he have you in his hands he has me in his right hand in his right hand yes it's it's it's it's amazing what what he does and he and I'm no different from anyone that's listening he'll do it for them too just takes that that hum humility to ask for the help yeah mother Mary the humility of mother Mary yes to accept the Angels yes she said she said thy will be done yes he said humble me I will humble myself down to a servant of the Lord yeah really beautiful yeah very beautiful it's very beautiful mhm so tell me about your friendship together and how it began this this moment yeah in the church was this church a church you were used to going to or was it a different Church oh so we actually met at a job we were modeling dresses so we're in these big dresses and that's when we what kind of dresses wedding dresses wedding dresses okay and so we we met that day we just instant I mean there was so much weight to what was going on in that moment that we had no idea and now we look back of course if I saw a girl crying in the corner I would go up to her but I knew and I wouldn't necessarily say we're going to get through this together cuz I can't make that promise cuz I don't know you and I don't know you know what I mean but I knew no we're actually going to get through this together and it was a true foreshadowing for what would happen with us in the future where we have gotten through everything together when we first became friends I was already a few years into reading the Bible so I was really on fire for God and really ministering to those around me and and I've always had a heart for evangelism and bringing people to Jesus and just getting as many people saved as I could and then Ari gets on fire and then we're doing this together and it's not conventional and it doesn't look like Ministry for other people we're at parties and we're just we have girls who are who are bound by drugs and alcohol and addiction and issues mental health issues and you know and sexual sin here in LA and just all these things that you get wrapped up in LA and we we'll be out we've never been big party people at all but like we'll be out somewhere and girls will gravitate toward us not knowing anything about us maybe seeing a cross on our neck but they don't know that we have we have Jesus in us and we and he has the power to heal but they can tell that there's something in us that's attracting them and so they'd come and just ask for help from us knowing nothing about us and so that's where this whole thing began that Jesus was healing us and through our healing others were getting healed and so we believe in a God who heals today the way he did in the Old Testament in the New Testament physical ailments and illnesses and mental illnesses and so we've made it our mission to just let everybody know the power that's in the name of Jesus and that if you read the Bible things happen in your life and everything transforms and changes and then I think that she and I didn't have any Christian friends in the beginning so it was really just her and I trying to get through the days yeah we're we're in this sanctification process where God is like I mean there's so much that we were completely in the world not of course we love Jesus but we're not living by the world there's so much in our lives that had to be broken off and burned out of us but we had no accountability we had no mentors all we had were each other and the Bible and we're stumbling through our sanctification she's holding me accountable I'm holding her accountable beauti iron sharpening iron like it says in scripture yeah right you know it's I just you don't don't understand I mean she literally she she's younger than me but she was like almost like a like a mother because I when she met me like I literally couldn't even lift my head in the morning and she like would just sit there and like hold me in her arms and I remember one of my favorite memories of our friendship was we started watching The Chosen before we even started reading the Bible and there was a part helpful yeah it really is and I encourage anyone who's new M um it really helped me CU I'm a visual person yeah it gives you yes me too it gives me visualization good so when I watched The Chosen it gave me an idea to made me want to read the Bible because I learned a lot about the people in the Bible and so one of the first people we watched was Mary Magdalene and she reminded me so much of myself and I see this woman like with tortured thoughts in her mind and I see Jesus take her in his arms and he's like you are mine and I remember look at Angela and I was like Angela do you think Jesus will hear heal me like he did Mary Magdalene and she just helped my hand and looked at me and she was like of course he will and that was just the that was like the structure of our friendship her holding my hand through my whole journey and just constantly encouraging me and just being like you are going to make it it was almost like God shined himself through her like when I couldn't see myself s she showed me who I was it it was it was like really like every time I and she she taught me everything honestly like I was so broken I couldn't I had no selfworth like she taught me strength she taught me patience because of how patient she was with me I mean she had already been in the Bible I didn't know anything and she was like no no this is what you do and so and she's just she's so strong too I mean she's she's just she's a warrior for Jesus and she taught me strength and just yeah she's God knew exactly what he was doing putting us to together and let me give my friend her flowers too she's the best person in the world she is the greatest person and she always describes herself as being in like the worst time of her life she's the best Tammy like she's the greatest she's the most fun girl in the world she's the kindest the sweetest I mean anybody who meets her feels instantly safe and so even if essentially helping her or getting her through something she's in turn doing the exact same thing for me willing or knowingly or unknowingly and it's so funny cuz we I had been praying for a partner I'm like I just lost the the guy that I loved so much Lord please what do I do I want to I want to be a wife and a mother and he I'm so sorry he brought me me he brought my best friend but it's so funny what he's doing because it's like we're like a marriage we we do everything together we and every and it's like he's preparing us because it's teaching us to have patience and because we're together to like 24 hours a day we work together we do business together we do ministry together we practically live together we're together every single day and now we travel together to do speaking engagements and all these things we have a shared credit card for business like we are we have to work through things truly like a married couple does because this partnership that we have is so sacred and so important that we keep it healthy above all things you know what I mean and so we have to have very clear communication we have to be you know aware of each other's weaknesses oh I can tell she's feeling some way right now I'm just going to give her a second and let her quit you know what I mean and so you learn a lot about marriage too through these friendships yes of course you do yeah love really that's what it is that's you know I love that you just say that love and it's like she showed me unconditional love that's you just put it perfectly perfectly said that it doesn't matter no one's perfect but there's nothing I could do that she would be like oh well I'm going to throw in the towel bye like she loves me through my worse and so now I know what that feels like Jesus showed me that first but then he brought her in to be like look this is what love is so stop dwelling over over what you what I took stop crying over what I took from you because I'm showing you you know so so good yeah mhm it's beautiful love through Jesus yes yep that's what heals us amen how do you well I guess you've kind of told me that how do you challenge each other you know we always keep each other accountable okay MH like we don't let any we were not scared to tell each other the truth if I feel like she's doing something wrong I'm going to tell her and so that's yeah didn't you say that's how we challenge each other we the beautiful thing is that we are completely open to we allow each other to call us out you know there are some friends who you there are some friends even in my life I'm going to tell them the truth either way CU that's who I am but there are some who I know you know they probably won't receive this and it is what it is but like we will re we we know that we can call each other out for whatever it is and we know that we love each other so much that it's always because we care about each other so when she's calling me out for something I actually feel taken care of I feel cared for because I know if she didn't care about me why would she waste her breath and risk getting into an argument or and how did you get how did H how did you take that point of view that you would trust that the trust where trust come from well it comes from God I guess but you've you've nurtured that in your friendship trust you trust one another absolutely yeah we trust each you know I I think that's that is a great question and honestly that comes from having a Godly friendship like we've just been through so much together and it's I you I don't know how would you say we I think trust is built as we know and so we've built it over time in repetition of seeing it's kind of like your relationship with God too because it's hard to trust God without life EXP experience with him I'm able to trust God one because of what he says in his word but then I've seen the evidence of his faithfulness throughout my life I've seen the evidence that what he does matches with his word and when I match his word things go well for me so it's over a time of experience that's why you can't count people out or God out too early and with us I mean it's been countless times where she's been in a bad place or I've been in a bad place and maybe we've even gotten into gotten into it a little bit and could have thought this is going to be this is it for us but then in an instant it's as if it never happened and we build trust through that of being like neither of us are going to get offended neither of us are going to leave each other right the leaving part cuz often in relationships people when okay I've had enough and out the door they go you're you're right and it goes back to when when things are going good yeah of course you're going to the friends are going to stay by your side but when you go through the the pit of Hell and they're looking at you like I I'm not going anywhere and they sit by by your bedside I mean that's a friend you're going to have for life that's how you know if you can truly trust someone and if someone's really going to stay that's not even just a friend that's that's a part of you that's your family yeah that's for sure yeah yeah that's part of the sacrament that's right is to stay there that's right yeah no matter what absolutely mhm and that's that's where you find trust yeah stay there no matter what and I'm sure you know that because you've been married for so many years 35 years 35 years and I've known him for something like 55 years really yeah we met when we were seven and 8 years old what yeah so I so I can see him sometimes as a little boy and he can see me as a little girl are you it's the cutest thing I've ever heard did your par I'm sorry we lived on the same street wow he moved to town when I we were in grade three that is and lived right across from me that is the cute and can I ask I know this is your show but I'm just so curious cuz I know that you guys went through a period of time you and Mr Peterson where you had to separate everybody in your family got sick at the same time yeah Jordan and I specifically Michaela's were ongoing Health troubles because of her joint replacement in her ankle it was it was put in a little bit crooked wow when she was 17 so she could never really walk properly can you imagine the way that God puts us together and we're so fluid everything everything goes you walk and you feel nothing you just walk her ankle was a little bit crooked and so that year she decided she'd add it and she was going to go to Zurich to the place where the uh scientist doctor developed that replacement and have him redo it and he did and he made it way better and my husband went with her and I went to Vancouver Island to have some uh um fmt treatments feal um trans plants because my digestion I have irritable vowel and which is a terrible problem but actually is pretty good when you just eat meat well not too bad actually after all and and also this mold thing because you know that Michaela's been on a mold Journey we're all on this mold journey together and we have this binder called uh CSM cholestyramine that we take that's kind of like activated charcoal and if I take that then my digestion is a lot better so some people with crone disease and these terrible diseases can take this stuff and then they have a life wow so yes very we had very many challenges that year mine being cancer and then a leak in my lymph system that wouldn't go away and Jordan uh it was you know we were figuring out how to get them off anti-depressants right and we gave up all of this food and their mood got better wow but they would had been on an depressants for years and so I guess we didn't know this but if you go off anti-depressants too quickly it'll cause these kind of weird hallucinogenic of course episodes it just inflammation in the brain right and so it does all kinds of things and so they ate something they shouldn't have um when we were with my family at Christmas and then so then he came home and he couldn't get out of bed he was not sleeping he was anxious beyond belief and then he had to go back to work and teach and he thought well I can't do that so he went to the doctor and said give me something I can't sleep and I'm just out of my mind with anxiety so they gave him an a benzo daip and a sleeping pill and he took the sleeping pill just for a little while but he said the anxiety went away when he took that and so he continued to take that but then if you take it long term it starts to work against you yep and you to build a dependency and yeah and you're not supposed to take it forever you're supposed to take it for an acute problem and then not take it anymore and so that was his problem while I was going through this cancer wow was he was dealing with this anxiety and then the aftermath of going off his medication and the psychological troubles and it was complicated and he he was so complicated he had to live in a different um house I know and then go to a different country and then go to a different state and then live in a different house and it went on and on and on and on but I think God came to me when he did not for whatever reason so that I could support Jord because you know if Jor would come home and he would like I'm done and I'd say I have hope I have hope we're going to get through this you're going to go back on tour and stuff as he was suffering away suffering away but this is the thing right God gives us um tools to deal with life's tragedy CU we're going to all have tragedy all of us doesn't matter who we are light tragedy is coming yeah get prepared you know find read the Bible yeah you know I did yoga for a long time I didn't read the Bible and um I eventually had to read the Bible I needed I needed the word people need the word it's the only way yeah it seems to be the only way the only double-edged sword that's what the Bible describes it as it's the only thing that you actually prayer and the word together is what you fight Warfare with you don't wrestle against flesh and blood but against the principalities and the powers and the rulers of this dark world and so you can't take practical practices to go and fight the enemy and evil forces these are the two tools that we have to fight all the powers of Darkness so when you started reading the Bible how did you begin what what allowed you to make that a practice Yeah so I I developed this relationship with my pastor from so um from Socrates from Florida his name is Socrates and he's such a wonderful he's like my spiritual dad he's the most wonderful man and he would tell me every day to read the Bible but I was so resistant and there's always so much opposition when someone is going to start reading the Bible I see it with my friends they love Jesus but they won't pick up the book for some reason there's just always that resistance and so for the longest time he was teaching me what was in the word because I wouldn't read it myself and then so I was gaining all this knowledge and I was and I was hearing about Jesus and I was hearing about the word and and what the truth about um spiritual warfare and the authority that we have through Jesus because my battle was this anxiety that was taking over my life and then so I walked into a Christian Church one day it was my first time ever it felt like it was my first time ever even seeing scripture it was a passage from John on the up on the on the screen The Book of John and I can't remember what it was but I remember reading the words on the screen and something in my spirit lighting up completely I literally perked up in my seat when I read it because something in me recognized the words on the screen and now that I know that's Jesus In the Flesh those words are his spirit and so that Jesus in me recognized those words and I realized in an instant I have have to go I have to go read that I need that feeling what is that I went home and I opened the Book of John for the first time and my whole world I'll never forget I was in my bedroom it's as if I transported into another dimension where I just read the first chapter of John and it's talking about how in the beginning was the word and the Word was with God and the Word was God and so I realized that my God my Jesus the one who died on the cross he didn't leave us orphans that's what that means cuz he left us his word and the Holy Spirit who dwells within us and then the holy spirit is also these words so when I read these words I receive that spirit and that's what combats mental health issues for example because the fruit of the spirit I'm sure you know is love joy peace hope self-control um gentleness kindness and so when I receive these words I receive all these things the love and the joy and the peace and so people ask what do you mean you get peace and joy when you read the Bible cuz I'm receiving his spirit and those are the benefits to having the spirit of God dwell within you so good so good so good yeah and it changed my life Tammy forever changed my life I became obsessed and it's something you can pray for as well God make me hungry for the word make me make me want that more than all the food and the drink and the water in the world make me hunger and thirst for your word and that's what happened to me are you reading the Bible oh oh yeah the Bible is my life it's the only way it's freed me I for me I we started you introduced me to John as well which changed my life but the scriptures because I was I felt so scared I didn't feel safe I believed the opposite of what the word said how did you start reading the Bible Ang with Angela we started reading John we started with John as you were together yes I started with her she but what what I when I I started reading scriptures and and just him being like TR trust in me with all your heart do not be afraid I kept reading over and over to not be afraid that that he is going to work all things together and so I started reciting those scriptures I started declaring them over myself I started anytime I was in that Panic of fear I started reading what he said to what his word says and it was freeing me from anxiety it was filling me with with peace like this peace that literally surpasses all understanding and then when I actually started Living the word what do you mean by that well what I mean was when I when I first started reading the the Bible I was still living in sin and I still wasn't obeying what he was saying I was still you know living in sin yeah thinking the thing thinking the wrong thoughts yeah yeah yeah and so when we started this podcast I mean he was speaking to me very loud and clear that hey we don't I don't need you guys and so if you don't change your ways like it's I'm I don't need you and I just knew I could not have one foot in and one foot out in this when we started ministry and so it was like one day something clicked and I actually started Living out what he said and that's when I was set free reading the Bible was the start of it it started really freeing me but when I but you have to actually live it and um that's it's through works right it's through action that's faith faith plus works yeah y yeah there's a reason why it says sin is death and it's true I was no wonder why I was having anxiety no wonder why I was in severe depression especially when the breakups happened I was living in sin it led to death and so people think oh no I'm I'm suffering mentally yeah because you're living in habitual sin and you think it's going to be hard I don't even have an appetite for those things anymore truthfully of course things get hard and and yes I will I still I'm living in the flesh of course I have moments but my appetite has changed it's it's he has done it's miraculous what the word does doeses God give you challenges oh I probably have more challenges now than I did before but I think that as our faith grows our challenges get bigger absolutely yeah they do work yes it's not easy to pick up your cross and carry it that's right yeah but it's necessary but you know what it is I I I know how to put the armor of God on now okay I know how to fight back before when those thoughts over were so overbearing I thought it was me so when you put the armor of God on what you what you do I know I know when those negative thoughts come in I know it's it's not real so I'm able to say get out of here get out of here devil like seriously get out of here right you know and I know how to get into prayer and honestly when you are so um um soaked in prayer and in the word yeah the devil doesn't know how to have a clue how to get to you I'm serious that's why I make it my daily routine I don't go a day I get up in the morning I sit minimum hour in prayer with God reading the Bible and then you that's the armor of godh that's the armor of God and then even when those thoughts do come in you know what they are so you know how to fight back and that's the secret that's the secret sauce honestly sounds easy doesn't it and it's not it's not it's far from Easy not easy but it is simple yeah you know I think that I think that we over complicate things a lot of the time of course it says in the Bible to rejoice in your sufferings and that like these tests we're all going to be tested but these tests produce endurance and that endurance produces patience and that patience produces faith and so God will allow these things to come into your life yes there are evil forces at work that want to ruin your day and ruin your life absolutely absolutely but then there's also many things that God will allow to happen because it makes us stronger it makes us more dependent on him it makes us it's like and pay attention right it makes us pay attention yeah no I didn't pay attention I yeah I oops I I I go ahead no what were you going to say oh no cuz I was going to ask I I asked had a question about her faith but yeah yeah I just because you came to Faith a little bit oh much later much later right much later yeah much later I always thought I was paying attention uh but I definitely wasn't I was in self-will for sure I like that paying attention I really like that yeah pay attention listen pay attention I wasn't listening yeah I wasn't listening I was running the show for sure oh yeah can I ask when you came to Faith I'm curious was it after you were sick or before it was well it was during that time during it with the well I had I had this diagnosis of renal cell carcinoma which is something that grows a millim a year and doesn't kill anybody that's what they said I had and so we finished our book tour and then I went back to have surgery and I had surgery and I was getting better then I got a back pain and I went to the doctor and they looked more closely at the biopsy and saw that what I had actually was uh a tumor that was going to kill me within 10 months wow and they told me that and I thought well you know my mom's dead her family is all dead there's a lot of cancer in there I guess I have cancer and it's understandable and because I'm pretty pragmatic that way and I I don't scare easily my dad was very good at teaching me not to to step correctly but bravely forward you know he could have shared some religion with me but but he did he did some good things and so I was tough but I went home and uh my son was there and I went to tell him and I said um I got a prognosis I'm going to die in 10 months and the look in his eyes I Think Jesus was there and he looked at me and said there is love of the son for the mother and he is grieving and I thought oh my God he's grieving the loss of his mother and that's me I can't die don't start with me todayy so that's when it happened and I said to I said to Julian the go the The Doctors they have a pro prognosis but they don't know for sure it's a guess it's a educated guess but it's a guess only God knows when I'm going to die so let's just live each day with gratitude and and uh see how this goes and so then and so then that's what I did and it was 2019 so it's not been very long I'm very new at this wow and you are so but that bravery that your dad taught you that boldness it comes so it comes through so much in your relationship with God I meditated for years and years cuz I did yoga I meditated for years and years and years so when I turned to prayer I could pray yeah and I could stick with it and I did right a friend came to the hospital and gave me a rosary and I was like oh a rosary I don't know how to pray this do you want you know do you want to teach me and so she taught me came to the hospital every day for five weeks wow and sat with me and and prayed the rosary and she sponsored me to into the Catholic Church a that's awesome I love that so when I Len it just sounds like you you just have this childlike Faith you have that Faith you know the Hope yeah and that's yeah you gave that to me yeah so you are a special special woman well here we are together I'm really blessed to be sitting here with joy now really Joy you're wonderful amazing it's amazing dirt a lot you that is I was a very headstrong person I was a very and and things went pretty well for a long time right you know I thought I kind of had it handled but I certainly didn't I certainly didn't cuz we don't we don't have it handled we don't not on our own no we don't no we have to accept the love and the guidance but isn't that so nice that you don't have to depend on yourself you just it's all in God's hands I always always fought that battle my whole life that I had to right well that's why we were anxious yeah and and we're looking for Solutions in different places because we couldn't handle it on our own oh I move through life I I Timmy I wish you could see me I move through life truly without a care in the world most of the time know I know God I know just like how we said earlier how you build trust I've seen what he's done in my life and so now in the face of a storm even a bad storm and like you said and you know I wanted to ask you about this because I what seen in my life a lot is that because the the the devil knows that he knows about us and so this woman Stephanie eek put it perfectly she said you got to go through him to get to me and so he knows that he can't get to us when we're in right standing with God he can try all he wants but whatever he tries Genesis 15:20 you meant harm against me God meant it for good so it's actually better if he tries cuz God will use that weapon that was formed for our good but often times in my life life and I think AR's life as well the attacks are mostly against the people that we love and so for us it's like we that's the so what do you do what do you do about that those people that you love truly pray pray truly pray that's it yeah I know our hearts out yeah and and we like you know how Angela was for me during that time you have to be that that person to the people that are suffering and just let them know that there you see half the battle is just being seen knowing that you're not alone and just being there sitting with them praying on them just just being there yeah y yeah and not losing hope like how just every every time I hear you talk you just always had that seed of Hope and you just we always like when we talk we're like we have hope every God's we have a God we serve a God that shows up again like we said about the Fruit of the Spirit of them is Hope and so through the midst of a really trying situation that looks absolutely hopeless God can give you hope even through that yeah in the midst of really severe deep deep pain you can have joy yeah and you can have peace so when we see people we love suffering and we know we know what it is and we we are steadfast in prayer we also pray for ourselves God give me peace through it yeah you know if you can't change it just give me peace through it yeah right good idea yeah what do you have a vision for your life do you have a vision for your life Jordan has a future authoring program have you looked at that oh have you looked at that no but I will be doing that program wait do that I would love to do that what is what is it well I didn't have much guidance right yeah I mean my parents they pretty much gave me luggage and said you know go have a life same right not mine mine did the opposite so why was I such a bad kid anyway so I was always looking for guidance and books mostly you know so i' go in the library and think some book's going to come to me and it's going to help me and go in there and find books cute I was seeking from a long time ago seriously yeah seeking seeking in all the wrong place yeah but anyway then uh I when I went to C George uh he had developed with his graduate student uh a program uh a computer program but it was based on uh a piece of paper and so I first did the future authoring when it was a piece of paper he tried it out on me to see if it would help and I thought oh this is better than what colors your parachute or any of these guidance books self-help books that you get and so it's a wonderful program it asks you to imagine just imagine if you were taking the best care of yourself that you could and things were going the best that way they could where where would you be what would you be doing and just imagine like take take five minutes and just imagine where that would be and your visual person that it'd be easy it'd be easy to do that and then and then he has some other explanation about who do you admire and he he gets you know he gets kind of your um attention to think up and to pray up and to imagine what could be a star right a star that you can wish upon really in a way and then through this program and you can do it in 45 minutes but you can also do it in 4 hours is like half do half of it today and half of it tomorrow and I think sleeping on it halfway through is good because it's kind of a dream that you're putting down you're putting down your worries and your hopes and your dreams and then coming up with a plan a specified plan and it was amazing because I did this and what did I put in my plan that I wanted to heal my relationship with my father cuz my mother was also very anxious and had had a traumatic past and so she and my dad drank so then she had me distressed my dad and it took me a long time to find my way back to him but that was in my future authoring and as soon as I wrote it down and specified it that it it just appeared this opportunity to heal my relationship with my dad it's a really cool coolr sign me up it's $15 Take My Money Take It All I'll send you I'll send you it I'll send you it to yeah yeah absolutely oh do it who knows what you'll what your vision will be cuz so you haven't thought about a little bit oh absolutely I um I used to have so many Visions for my life and I feel like God has blessed me with the ability to give me Visions in a way he gives me pictures in my head that will often times come to fruition later on and it it's happened to me my whole life especially the past few years um but I used to have all of these dreams and things from my life that were so like you said self-willed that I could have thought were from God but now I go back and I realize that no those were probably self-willed for the most part because now when God has actually put me in my god-given purpose the real reason he put me on on on the planet is to be of service to him and to his people now I the only Vision I have for my my life is serving God in whatever way that he feels fit and so evangelism is the most important thing to me bringing people to Salvation leading people in that way apologetics are really important to me as well um exp what do you mean by AP apologetics is kind of like the being the debate in in explaining the faith to other people and to and teaching in a way and so these things whether it be on a public platform like a pod or I say it all the time if he wants to send me to Egypt on a missionary trip right to never be seen by anyone again but to be doing true impactful work yeah that is the only Vision that I have for my life and hopefully a bunch of cute kids and a husband that I love so much yeah you know right so that's all I see for myself yeah oh yeah do this program it I I thought it was so good it was the it was the best thing I had ever done that had allowed me to imag a a future that was special in in my way I love and also to heal the relationships that had been somehow disrupted in my life and to heal them again and and to also pay ATT I had to pay attention to my own health and stuff in that same thing whatever comes up for you whatever comes up from you you write it down yeah and uh then and then see what happens yeah mhm it's it's a good meditation and uh it helps people if they're in University they don't drop out they only drop out half as much if they do this program yeah W yeah wow we're going to do do you have a vision yeah I I think the same as you an like I I had all these big dreams and I wanted to be a wife and a mom and I although I still do I truly I don't live for myself anymore and you know I I I believe and I'm so grateful I went through so much suffering in my life because I have the ability to understand people that suffer right I I have the ability to understand mental health and and children and because I I went through it my whole life and so I just want to glorify God and be his servant and truly help help people that's I believe that's my gift to to help to heal I want to build homes for people and and help the kids and the sick kids I want to build homes for people you want to go build homes something I want to build cwall homes oh I would love I don't know what that is but I'll do it with ramed Earth rammed Earth doesn't mold so it stays clean it stays the air stays fresh and then people can go there and heal oh please doesn't that sound good let's get on Miss please in Arizona probably yeah we're not too far yeah and then we can have well I think I don't know but I think mold is evil yeah it is of course it is because it tries to it tries to get you to accumulate things so it can grow more in the Dark Places wow that's literally what evil does doesn't that sound evil and I think when people come out of mold and they stop eating things that make them inflamed then they find God I think it's helpful it's helpful to clear their minds and when you clear your minds then then uh it's easier for for your attention to come to what's highest I think so anyway AB what I think AB I think because I've been we've been implementing fasting into our spiritual life for a while now that's very good you know why H you know why you've you've uh researched why yes like tell me no tell me please well when you fast the warn oute cells in your body that's what your that's what your body will do it'll seek out the damaged cells in your body and and that's the only way that's the only way to regenerate is fasting and how long of fast would that take well I think you know 48 hours is a is a good fast enough and you and you can do longer fasts as well but uh but even when people are doing inter intermittent fasting now I do inter fasting yeah I think that's that's also helpful good so that's why you do it well I only eat meat and meat mimics fasting yeah really yeah so if you're uh well that that's probably why that's partly why I survived the cancer because I was already on a meat diet and so it didn't grow as fast as it was supposed to because it was this K typ of cancer that was just supposed to wipe me out so fast they had no treatment cuz everybody dies so quick but it didn't grow that fast in me can I ask you something do you get your meat from a specific like like a farm raised or is it just um well we have a very good butcher in Toronto and he gets it all locally he gets all the meat locally and he supplies us with all our meat and in the states Michaela has been buying her meat from snake farms and they have delicious meat I don't know a lot about them but I know that they're uh you know a good company and that uh they're like sought after and their meat is sought after so I'm I don't know enough about them yet but I do know in in Toronto we have good and it is very important that that the animals are treated prop I agree yeah I do too um you know this this has to be good from from the molecules up right it has to be good from the spirit up yeah absolutely yeah that's right but animal husbandry hopefully I was talking to a friend of mine last night she's a psychi psychologist too and she said she was talking to a surgeon a colonal rectile surgeon who said that grains grains are very hard very hard on the system yeah and so I think if Farmers would turn back to um animal husbandry and you know I mean there's going to be grain necessary for some for some people but it's difficult to digest and it gives you leaky gut and so it it it's difficult for lots and lots of people so we need we need to raise animals up again to be the um they they are animals are we we are we are to be in charge of the animals properly gratefully respectfully you know yeah and we've lost all of that with our animals not even just with each other but with their animals too we treat them as our babies now we have dogs as babies because people are scared to have children I don't know what the dogs think of that it's like I'm a dog what am I doing in this like little I know they dress them up they put boots on them everything the dogs dog I want to bite something that's so true so you know animals they're they've been taken in different directions and now we think oh there's too many too many cows cuz there's too much pollution like oh come on give me a break in Ireland they're going to get rid of cows they're going to get rid of like 200,000 cows like kill them yeah yeah I know I'm sorry to tell you that no and just discard the right like what are they going to do with all of the all of the meat yeah I know it's crazy yeah there's so much craziness going on there's something about in the spirit where everything is turned upside down like the enemy wants to pervert everything so he turns everything upside down and he like he M he it's just everything is confused like just how you said that nobody wants to have kids even though that was God's first promise in the Bible the most the most important thing that God even thought in the beginning was be fruitful and multiply that's how important it is for us to have children and reproduce but no we're not going to have children we're going to have our animals as as as children and let like our dogs Rule Us in that way and it's just like everything gets so confused and turned around it's very interesting to think about yeah well we have we have a lot of work to we have a lot of work to do we do that's why you do the future authoring plan and see where God wants you to go yeah yeah AB who knows I mean I know he has big plans for you he wouldn't have healed you so young so you have lots of work to do that is so cute to think about wait Tammy he she said he wouldn't have healed you that young I know that is really in the heart that was really prophetic and really good beautiful it's good it's good you have something to do you definitely have something to do so like meditate on it and find out what it is and get with it really I know you are already getting with it but get with it even more definitely we can definitely go even anymore who knows what it'll be you don't know only God knows oh lord it's a surprise isn't he so cool though really so many surprises I don't know either which is great but you never know that's the mystery of God is that you go your whole life and he always can reveal to you a new purpose and something that you're supposed to do yeah yeah it's crazy fun crazy fun let's see do I have any more questions no we talked about your faith Journey yeah your friendship the CH how you challenge each other your vision and how you chose uh girls gone Bible girls gone Bible which I recommend I recommend that that we all Bible know that people my listeners look that up thank thank you so much well you know if you're reading the Bible if you're discussing your day and what challenges have come up and how you're dealing with them people need to know these things it's helpful it's helpful you can have a life of Serenity wouldn't that be joyous and free amen yeah we all have access to it through the power of Jesus Christ he's the only way it's the only way it's the only way mhm yeah maybe I'll rame my podcast it's the only way way that's really cute I love that that it's been such a gift just to be with you today I don't want to leave you want to hang out later I'd like to would no you just you bring us you brought me such a comfort in Angela you're sweet people say it all the time I forgot we are filming I truly actually forgot we are filming today this is like the most comfortable I've ever felt ever felt I like doing podcasts you're really good at it thank you I like it you're amazing at it oh thank you you as really good questions oh thank you you're so calm I prayed about it this morning it's not me thank you Jesus yeah that's right thank you Jesus see I asked I said please please allow you know us to find uh the right way you know and to find good things Inspire us today and you inspired me today are you kidding with your Faith and Hope and how much you've endured and you're you're so soft and so strong at the same time you are the epitome of femininity I think oh wow you know truly no seriously because femininity is that soft and gentle quiet Meek Spirit like it says in the Bible but there's so much strength behind it I Aspire to's been very helpful he's been very helpful he's been a good husband very helpful he challenges me big time you can imagine I I would love to watch you guys have a conversation it's probably like intellectual like sparring with you guys like actually it probably it'd be so cool to watch you guys have a conversation it's quite a bit of fun we have quite a bit of fun you guys are funny though that's the thing about you guys are really funny yeah you guys and Michaela they're so micha's funny she she was about 20 before I realized I couldn't take anything she said seriously that's awesome can we come to a family party that's well I'm going to I'm going to start I'm going to hold a Women's Conference oh in the next year or year and a half or something so Michaela will be there you guys will be there we'll be there yeah love that and it'll be it'll be down you know in probably around Arizona probably love it we would be honored and all all of ggb will be there as well oh yeah there all of our fam will be there sounds good sounds good we have work to do we do yeah we got some houses to build mold free houses to fight going to bring people to Jesus we're on a mission together we're going to bring people to Jesus clear their minds amen yes yeah amen am amen thank you Tammy thank you so much for having us my pleasure [Music] am