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Mate Choice and Evolutionary Psychology

Oct 5, 2025

Overview

This lecture explores the science of mate choice, highlighting evolutionary frameworks, universal and sex-specific preferences, mechanisms of deception, the "dark triad," jealousy, attachment styles, and implications for healthy relationship dynamics.

Theoretical Framework for Mate Choice

  • Darwin’s sexual selection theory explains mate choice through intra-sexual competition and preferential mate choice.
  • Intra-sexual competition involves same-sex battles for mates, influenced by qualities related to status and position.
  • Preferential mate choice occurs when one sex agrees on desirable traits, giving those who possess them a mating advantage.

Universal and Sex-Differentiated Mate Preferences

  • Both sexes universally value intelligence, kindness, mutual attraction, good health, and dependability in long-term mates.
  • Women prioritize earning capacity, ambition, older age, and resource trajectory in long-term partners.
  • Men prioritize physical attractiveness, youth, and signs of fertility (e.g., clear skin, symmetrical features, low waist-to-hip ratio).
  • “Mate choice copying” occurs when someone is seen as more attractive if desired by others.

Short-Term vs. Long-Term Mating Preferences

  • Short-term mating: Physical appearance is prioritized by both sexes; women also find "bad boy" qualities more attractive.
  • Men may lower their standards in short-term, low-commitment contexts.
  • Women may use cues like social proof (other women’s interest) more in short-term mating.

Deception in Mate Selection

  • Both sexes use deception to enhance perceived desirability (e.g., edited photos, exaggerating traits).
  • Men exaggerate alignment in values; women may use mate choice copying.
  • Assessing qualities like emotional stability requires time and shared experiences.

Jealousy and Mate Guarding

  • Jealousy is evolved to protect romantic investments against threats like infidelity or mate poachers.
  • Jealousy can arise from mate value discrepancies, not just direct threats.
  • Vigilance and, in some cases, violence (e.g., stalking) are mate-guarding behaviors, with men more frequently being stalkers.

The Dark Triad and Mating Behavior

  • The "dark triad": narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy.
  • Individuals high in these traits are more likely to deceive, pursue short-term mating, and engage in sexual coercion.

Attachment Styles and Relationship Stability

  • Secure attachment fosters long-term relationship success.
  • Avoidant attachment is linked to intimacy issues and higher infidelity risk; anxious attachment leads to clinging behaviors.

Assessing Mate Value

  • People are generally good at evaluating their own and others’ mate value, influenced by self-esteem and social consensus.
  • Mate value is partly consensual (agreed by many) and partly individual (based on personal preferences).

Key Terms & Definitions

  • Sexual Selection — Evolutionary process favoring traits leading to mating success.
  • Intra-sexual Competition — Rivalry within the same sex for access to mates.
  • Preferential Mate Choice — Selection based on commonly desired traits by one sex.
  • Mate Value — A person’s overall desirability as a romantic partner.
  • Mate Choice Copying — Increased attractiveness of individuals desired by others.
  • Dark Triad — Personality traits: narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy.
  • Attachment Styles — Patterns of relating in relationships (secure, avoidant, anxious).

Action Items / Next Steps

  • Review the concepts of sexual selection and mate choice frameworks.
  • Read about the "dark triad" and its impact on relationships.
  • Consider self-reflection exercises to assess personal mate value and attachment style.
  • Optional: Explore recommended books for deeper understanding of evolutionary psychology and human mating strategies.