Exploring Trauma and Identity in Homunculus

Homunculus is a manga about a man who consumes his own semen. And if you haven't clicked off this video yet, re-evaluate your life. Whilst that hook wasn't entirely a joke, thankfully the manga does not solely revolve around a man's semen intake and rather follows a disgusting, pathologically lying, narcissistic, emotionally devoid man. searching for purpose and to feel alive within a cold, unforgiving world. I highly recommend the manga if you are into psychological, ambiguous works, dealing with unlocking the secrets to being human and the limitations of the mind and how dangerous obsession can become. Going forwards, there will be heavy spoilers, so you have been warned. To make one thing completely clear going into this, Nakoshi, the 34-year-old protagonist, is a piece of trash. Whilst pursuing further understanding of the manga, I came across those who would try to justify the man's actions, claiming he was a product of society rather than one corrupt from within. However, anyone with a normal clutch to morality will agree his actions are irredeemable and at times evil. Society has had a negative effect upon him, yet his operations are not direct causes of society, for not all those defeated by the swiping blows of society's talons would culminate into Nakoshi's evil actions. For some context, the main catalyst of the story is the procedure of trepanation, something that has existed for millennia, dating back to even the stone age. Put simply, it's a hole in your head without touching or damaging the brain, which would be the main difference to a lobotomy, which severs connections between the frontal cortex. Trepanation is not used in modern medical practice because well, it's kind of stupid. However, in ancient times, it was used for a multitude of reasons. It has an interestingly diverse history, appearing in several cultures all aiming for similar things, such as relief from mental issues like headaches or epilepsy, or physical precautions of evacuating blood from one's head trauma. Most theory does seem rather baseless to modern society, considering how much they loved yapping about evil spirits inhabiting the brain. which we now define as mental health issues, but we can understand the thought process of these old-age doctors who had to work off pure vibes. The practice of trepanation did eventually begin to dwindle as the associated benefits did not outweigh the seemingly high mortality rate, and therefore as a cure to mental illness it became slowly obsolete. In modern times, craniotomy acts as the evolved version of trepanation, which is only done after thorough analysis such as MRI scans of the brain, and typically replaces the removed part of the skull after operation is carried out. However, another reason trepanation was practiced in ancient history and voluntary methods to this day is to unlock the heightened senses of the brain, for our ancestors believed that the key to uncovering this was drilling random assholes into your skull to improve blood circulation and return it to a more active state, which newborn children are believed to possess. Practitioners were under the belief that by expanding the mind's capabilities, capabilities, this would connect us to the higher beings, spirits and all that juju. There is no actual evidence to confirm that trepanning caused an increased consciousness or unlocked the potential of the brain. However, the procedure is still closely associated with these sentiments for some reason. Think of the theory as simply reopening your mind manually, used mainly in occult circumstances by freaky believers outside of Orthodox science. Anyways, with that incredibly summarized background of trepanation, a subject in which I urge you to research yourself outside this video, we can begin the dive into this elusive media named Homunculus. Due to this manga being 15 volumes, an in-depth explanation of every volume would take several decades and because I have plans in 2094 of dropping dead, After giving a thorough inspection of Volume 1, I will be skipping two parts I consider most important for the understanding of the story. Susumu no Koshi is a homeless man living in his car parked between an upper-class hotel and a park filled with homeless campers. The contrast is an important motif throughout the story as it paints a nuanced impression of this man, who despite being homeless possesses a car and a suit and refuses to fall into the ranks of those who set up tents and cast aside their previous lives. We learn later on that Nakoshi used to be part of a very powerful company that dealt in finances and investments and was a very wealthy individual. Yet despite his materialistic successes, freedom to envelop himself of in carnal desire, his feelings increasingly disconnected from society, which is something that he has felt his entire life, being a part of a fake world that offers no genuinity. From the sprinkled flashbacks of the former life we are shown this, and how he felt like an invisible wraith that no one would ever notice, and I will discuss that more in depth later on. Nakoshi is known as Carboy by the campers, and whilst he is welcome around them in a social setting, such as drinking or eating. They don't fully respect him as a person due to him being a compulsive liar. The connection he possesses with his car is interesting, almost as if he has a bond with the vehicle such as one you'd have with another human, easily hearing the internal issues and fixing the car up in due time. You could definitely make the case that he has a stronger bond with his car than any human in his life anymore. He observes a homeless man feeding the pigeons and throwing a stone at a crow who attempts to indulge in the feast. This is a rather on-the-nose metaphor for society and how only certain individuals are permitted access to the finer qualities of life and others are treated as outlaws, the crow retreating back to the cold dead branches up above. Nakoshi delivers many different stories of his origins and happenings in life to the homeless people in the park and they realize he is a liar but tolerate him due to the free alcohol he provides. One panel I really enjoyed was Nakoshi's comment on human behavior with the effective line art to depict his serious tone. Amonculus is a manga about breaking out of the monotonous processes of society and Nakoshi is shown to be someone who understands this should be a universal ambition from very early on. From a near distance he is observed by a strange man with tattoos and rings implying some sort of cultist or alternative lifestyle but more on him later. After Nakoshi returns from a trip to the sea, something he does often, he realizes he is finally out of money and panics about what this will mean for the future. This desperation is the main ingredient the strange man needs, who returns with a wrapping of the window. Manabu Ito is easily my favourite designed character within the manga and potentially my favourite character altogether, for his rebellious, fascinating style develops and evolves as the story progresses in a healthy way about discovering one's true self. At first his incredibly large nose was something of a shock to me, but eventually I did get used to it. Not any real analytical purpose mentioning that, Just a basic observation I had. Ito analyzes the situation of Nakoshi and offers an easy means of acquiring cash that Nakoshi would need. Trepanation. I've already explained the essence of trepanation at the beginning, but ultimately Nakoshi brushes the man away as a crazy cultist and tells him to get someone else to be his guinea pig. Although he objects to being homeless, we see Ito's intellect shine through, easily noticing that when Nakoshi lies, the left side of his mouth rises. The mysterious man leaves with the wind at his back. back, however when the next day arrives and Nakoshi's car is towed away, his desperation finally overcomes his nonchalant demeanor and caves into the offer from Ito, who seemingly manipulated events to achieve Nakoshi's consent. Ito explains he studies human beings through all sorts of avenues such as medical, psychological and occult. Ito is someone who pursues knowledge of all forms related to the human condition and understanding the mind is his current obsession. They agree to begin the operation tomorrow and Nakoshi sleeps in the car. the hotel room, once again in a fetal position. This is another running motif throughout the manga and shows his desire to protect himself from being hurt by the outside world and gives him a sense of comfort. Ito picks up Nakoshi on a sick-ass motorbike and they arrive at his lab where mountains of books and research is stored, along with an actual skull. As they begin, Ito discusses the common practice of trepanning throughout history in some menial attempts to calm Nakoshi's potential nerves and even boasts about his above-average talent. as a doctor. The first gruesome imagery is shown as Ito drills into Nakoshi's head, blood splattering and his body contorting from the pain despite the anesthetic numbing it slightly. On the wall there is a creepy woman's face that returns many times throughout the story, which is actually an interpretation of an authentic example of trepanation. Amanda Fielding carried out this procedure in 1970 after becoming obsessed with expanding her consciousness and images and even video footage exist to this day should you wish to look for it. The uncanny image on the wall is meant to make us feel a sense of unease at the whole basis of trepanning. Ito describes more of the scientific reasons behind why it would improve one's consciousness, however Nakoshi's pessimistic attitude kicks in once more, laying a joke on the young doctor about seeing things beyond the physical realm. Currently, we are meant to sympathize with Nakoshi's doubt that the premise of trepanation is nothing short of a ridiculous occult obsession. Whilst Nakoshi is alone, he begins filing through Ito's research and comes across some alarming records of past experiments involving trepanation. Cases of failure, mixed with psychosis, and even death put him on edge despite him claiming he didn't Believe it, his twitching body and raised lip betray his true thoughts. The next day, the two embark upon tests to see if the drilling has worked, however, Nakoshi remains adamant that no change has occurred, and they are simply wasting their time with silly paranormal investigations, and even if they did exist, he can't see them, nor does he actually care for it. Nakoshi is self-absorbed, lacking empathy for others going into the story, happy to be contained to himself, and remaining pessimistic to other people and upper classes of society. He does uncover a pseudo-empathetic state thanks to the results of trepanation, which we shall see later, although it is slightly more complex than that as it still ends up serving himself. Ito makes it clear to Nakoshi that he intends to disprove the existence of the paranormal. Due to him being a man of scientific background, it acts as a thorn in his side that any slight belief in this realm remains in his being. However, his fascination with the human being is what drives him to permanently extinguish any doubt or skepticism he may have. Ito conducts a basic intuition test with 25 cards containing five separate designs on every five cards and Nakoshi is tasked at selecting five of the same type of card. He is requested to do this using purely the left side of his body as this is the side more associated with feeling rather than thought and for the first time we see the iconic hand over the eye move from Nakoshi. He manages to select four out of five of the star cards which calculated is a zero point sixteen chance of occurring with the basis being one of five chances happening four times in a row. This is clearly very impressive and shocks both Nakoshi and Iso, however Iso brushes it aside as inconclusive evidence as it must be repeated multiple times to be authentic. As the associates depart for the night, the true mystery of this manga finally reveals itself. After rubbing his eye whilst looking at people, Nakoshi's perception of reality begins to change. At first he sees a man without his whole head, part of it missing as if it never even existed, then a rather large man who, when closing his right eye, becomes as thin as paper wavering in the wind. And rightfully so, this shocks Nakoshi, someone who has not often displayed much emotion to this stage, lost in bewilderment at what is happening in front of him. The art of the double spreads is fascinating, almost a Where's Waldo type of shot, with multiple freaks of reality on show, people split in half, walking upside down, tree branches and leaves for a body. a girl whose body is split into multiple sectors, and finally a robot. Accidentally spilling his drink on a Yakuza boss's suit, Nakoshi is in for a beating, yet with his newfound power he realises the pinky of the robot is exposed and touches it. To everyone's shock, the boss flings backwards, crashing onto the floor. That pisses off the boss even more, for reasons we find out later, and the robotic exterior slowly begins to disappear, revealing a weak boy inside the fortified suit. The shaking arm and saddened scared eyes increase in intensity as the boss approaches Nakoshi with the intent of severing his pinky with a knife. However, from Nakoshi's perspective, the child is simply cutting his own pinky off with a sickle. If you are confused, I shall explain. The boss harbors deep trauma after an incident resulting in his friend losing their pinky, and this is something that strongly affected the boss, leading him to take his trauma out on others, causing more pain. as a result of his guilt, the robotic armor being a symbol of his hard outer shell, yet easily broken down when specific strings are pulled, such as the pinky and the sickle. The boss begins spontaneously crying, tears flooding his face without knowing exactly why. Nakoshi lets go of the boss and, embarrassed at his sudden waterworks retreats away, leaving Nakoshi sweating and confused at the mindfuck that just happened. Admittedly, on my first read, I was completely lost as well. But of course it becomes clearer as the story progresses, or so you think. One gripe I had with the manga initially was its ambiguity and rather contradictory approach, defining something then shattering your perception of said definition. But eventually I grew to love the winding turns as we discovered Nakoshi's self at the same rate he himself did. One of the more obvious visions Nakoshi sees is a man with the head of a penis. You don't have to be a genius to understand the implications of this. and is certainly a nod towards just what Nakoshi is seeing in other people. Returning to the homeless area, as he pisses, Eater the cook joins him and we see that a metallic shiny reflective egg contains the man and this one confused me even more apart from the inference it was meant to represent being protected or shielded away from prying eyes. Nakoshi is pretty beaten up over the visions and sleeps trembling from the shock and cold. The next day, Nakoshi explains his visions and Iso reads on, fascinated, some amazing panels that show his intensity as he begins questioning Nakoshi for commonality amongst the visions. The restaurant contains these strange monsters as well, from a man with the body of a man who has been killed by a man. of an ostrich to a man made of a melting candle and Ito, being the genius he is, begins to uncover the truth after conducting a little experiment with a woman who seemed to have no neck. This was quite an obvious indicator to myself that the visions had some sort of relation to trauma or issues of the mind as the neck that appeared was clearly mangled and disfigured implying trauma to that area via strangling and therefore it made sense for the woman to appear with no neck as she subconsciously tries to protect herself. Later on, Nakoshi continues seeing odd forms and unexplainable sights. Ito phones Nakoshi to tell him he has solved everything, claiming the monsters he is seeing are homunculus. Nakoshi assumes Ito is just chatting out his ass, his narcissistic attitude that humans simply attempt to appear smart is showing, but we finally see some of Nakoshi's inner trauma come to the surface when he remembers an old friend named Ken. The artwork to depict the brain's functionality is absolutely incredible and probably my favourite art by Yamamoto. and a skateboard flashes across his mind, causing his face to drastically surrender to what seems like shame or guilt. Volume 1 ends with Nakoshi speeding off under a new impression he isn't going insane. The initial volume may appear a confusing mess of mumbo jumbo, however, the introduction to this psychological story was never going to be easy, which is why I found it necessary to explain in a bit more depth going into it. Now we have the basis understood, we can analyze the story of Homunculus and what it means to be human. The definition of a homunculus is a little humanoid creature, however in a field closer to neurology, a sensory homunculus is a touch map of how we perceive things, with different proportions corresponding to the importance of the specific sense. and fingers, lips and tongue, eyes and ears, all of these different senses are felt in the brain as well, which transfer from the area of effect. What Nakoshi sees are distortions of the soul, as explained by Ito, things people have suppressed deep in their subconscious, mental and emotional trauma within them, on show to someone who can peer into the mind of others. Ito explains his theory with all subjects viewed by Nakoshi, and it appears to make complete sense, however things change eventually. As we learn, every single homunculus Nakoshi sees are simply a reflection of his own trauma and pain, manifesting into other people as well. Everything he sees is part of his own subconscious viewing of himself, his two-faced duplicity, his guilt, his regret, shame, emptiness, contempt, fear, anger, self-protection, and narcissism. Nakoshi is a man who underwent severe plastic surgery and threw away everything he had to experience a new life. By doing this he lost the last part of himself that made him feel special or loved. Still harbouring a deep disdain towards humanity and his own past, he moved on like a wraith in the shadows, destroying lives without a second thought in his business until karma eventually caught up with him. It was during the days after his plastic surgery he begun consuming his own semen in menial attempts of tasting, smelling and feeling like life still coursed through his veins. It is a very disgusting yet desperate attempt that also reinforces his self-absorption, his own product being the only thing he needs to sustain himself. No one could ever give him a buzz, not in the world he deemed to be fake. We see the first sign of his newfound purpose of curing homunculi before he is even aware of what they are, after meeting again with the Yakuza boss and breaking him down by discussing his past trauma involving slicing his friend's pinky off with a sickle. However, this resonates so deeply within Nakoshi. as he experienced the same exact thing, accidentally pushing his friend Ken into oncoming traffic and fleeing the scene in panic. He opens up to the Yakuza boss as he cries for his own guilt, claiming he chose to remove himself from friendships in favour of a lonely existence, purely to protect his own weak mind from taking more pain and regret for his thoughtless actions. Initially, we experience sympathy for our protagonist, it is only natural after all, whilst his morality has been painted as somewhat ambiguous, He has done nothing out of spite or genuine evil and therefore we feel sorry for his sorrowful life. However, the cracks do begin to show as soon as he gets out of the situation he begins laughing, cackling even at the perceived patheticness of the Yakuza boss. But this quickly faced the tears and pain for Nakoshi who can't escape his regret for Ken screaming and crying at his mistake. The Sand Gull or Symbol Gull is where Nakoshi's despicable nature is for me completely solidified. as being an irredeemable piece of trash. We are introduced to the girl who is 17 years of age after Nakoshi spots her to be a homunculus. The girl works at a schoolgirl underwear modeling company, which is fucked up enough as it is, but Japan is Japan, I guess, and technically not prostitution, which the manga beats us around the head enough with. Nakoshi inspects the girl who appears to be a Full body shape-shifting sand model, altering her design to whichever mold she needs to fit. The initial meeting scene is rather uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons, involving the girl presenting her nether regions in attempt to seduce Nakoshi, or at least her subconscious thoughts are surrounding that. A face appears spouting lewd commentary and thankfully Nakoshi gets creeped out and leaves. The two pursue the girl however and Ito becomes fixated on the way to defeat her Monculus by destroying her fixed routine. So they intercept her during her usual action of shoplifting as Nakoshi watches from afar, analyzing her altering state. Ito says she is carrying around a heart that is as dry as a desert, with no real clue of what the real her looks like. On a reread, it is so blatantly obvious how much these homunculus relate to Nakoshi, who literally cannot even remember his own face before the surgery and feels nothing in his heart such as drive or ambition. Despite multiple attempts to find herself, she is left in this void still of nothing, a failure and unknowing of where she belongs in the world, shown through her easily changing figure. When Ito has the girl in his clutches, he forces her to answer questions about herself, all whilst focusing on his middle finger, which is on the left side of her body, in order to promote her to feel, rather than think. The girl answers vaguely, using labels and roles in society to define her, something Ito denies as being her true expression. and presses on intensely to unearth her true self. Eventually she has no answer, she is just her, and Ito claims she is scared to realize her true potential and self, living her life by the book her parents forced upon her, molding her to their own wishes rather than her own. Due to this oppression, she developed rebellious tendencies to escape her mother's control, but again this is not her true self, just uninspired attempts of appearing different. Ito then strikes, saying to find her true self she must destroy all manuals, all rulebooks and do something forbidden, such as sex. At this point, the girl's homunculus has been destroyed, slowly rebuilding itself to the words of Ito, the one thing her parents have not included in their rulebook being sexuality. This is how to break her pattern and it may seem rather predatory, but Ito concludes it is the only way. The two get closer, all whilst Nakoshi watches on, however we see cracks in even Ito's form, that being a water vessel with no real appearance to showcase his lack of acceptance. of his true self. Water gushes out as Ito being human as well feels fear and ends up fleeing the scene of the girl who begins consuming him such as applying the lipstick. Whilst it is not made abundantly clear, Ito is either gay, transgender or simply a cross-dresser, the focal point of his story is accepting his true identity which is hinted regularly as not being just a rebellious style of clothing he decides to wear. We see later on that Ito is someone with deep emotional repression due to his father's influence. who condemn the cross-dressing he did as a child. Ito's relationship with Nakoshi is central to understanding his sexuality. There are moments in the manga that suggest Ito may have developed feelings for Nakoshi beyond mere scientific curiosity, such as the physical closeness of some of their scenes, such as when Nakoshi forces Ito to wear a dress, makeup and wig. This moment in fact acts as the main catalyst for Ito to indulge in his true identity, which was often depicted as something fluid and changing through his homunculus, as shown through water that bubbled and altered as time went on. Of course, this also reflects Nakoshi's own sexual fluidity, hinting at his own sexual repressions. However, I feel it is far more appropriate to assume Nakoshi's narcissism results in him being aroused and attracted to himself. The main evidence to reinforce this being the fact he frequently consumes his own semen, alongside having sexual intercourse with Nanako. At the end, her face turns into his own, and he passionately makes love to his own reflection. It's practically the same as that one Meat Cannon video where Andrew Eater makes out with himself, like that's all I could think when reading this scene, and highlights his egotistic personality. But anyways, I digress. Nakoshi takes the young girl home in his car, and as they talk he realizes she is made up of symbols rather than sand, a monster of the current day, unable to express any genuine emotions, so she must rely on symbols to shape her. This is something he also notices in her text messages and emails on her phone. A fraudulent amassing of emoticons that can plaster her empty emotions. The two characters then share a rather disturbing scene as the young girl consumes her own blood from self-harming, and Nakoshi debuts his semen eating. This whole sequence is sickening, especially as they parallel each other, obsessed with consuming their own liquids. Whilst the author could just be attempting to stir a reaction through shock value, It does connect them, both lacking feeling within life, so they must rely on their own fluids to experience taste or an unhealthy rush. Sometime later, Nakoshi returns the phone to the girl, however, in an amalgamation of his disgust for her, he begins groping her breasts. eyes and face. His sick twisted goal is to kill off her dreams of sex bringing her change, but stops eventually when he is once again bombarded by the symbols taking over him, like they did for Ito. The girl believes sex is a way to become her own person, as her mother constantly opposes her exploring this avenue of life, condemning it as filthy, dirty actions that she is far too young for. This has given the girl a false perception of what sex actually is, which is a common thing found in many young girls throughout society. A strict or uneducated upbringing naturally inspires people to seek answers through external sources, and this can put them into very dangerous situations from people who wish to take control of these unknowingly. Nakoshi begins monologuing some creepy bullshit about fixing her with his own hands, and gropes her again, to which the girl, now panicked, repeats multiple times to let go of him. The entire scene is very uncomfortable, as an unhinged Nakoshi resorts to brutally violating and scaring the girl, Painted with a psychotic and evil face, using his power of homunculus as justification of him literally breaking the law and traumatizing her. We are meant to assume this is him talking to his own self, some form of inner reflection about how he wants others to feel alone like himself. Yet the fact he needed to achieve this through this means is barbaric and inhumane, and completely detaches us from the relatability of the character and exhibits the beginning of Nakoshi's descent into unethical actions. In a sick and twisted way, the girl becomes human once more after Nakoshi chomps down on her skin and starts feasting on her wounds and blood. Cause this manga just continues to be fucked up. He technically does vanquish her homunculus, yet in a disgusting way. The symbol homunculus transfers onto Nakoshi like the robotic arm did, to symbolize the connection he shares with the people he encounters, his superficial personality being shown through the symbols upon him. We get to see more of Nakoshi's backstory in which he slept with many girls using the same bored tricks on them to win their hand in sexual relations, yet he felt nothing of speciality, still obsessed with his own semen and how it smelt and tasted. One time we see his genuine regret for his actions is when he encounters a taxi driver, a kind old man who used to have a high paying job but lost it after Nakoshi helped destroy the company. His face is painted with regret but he's not. body shaking and even tipping the man as a meagre attempt to pay back his shame. He discovers the man ended up being homeless, with images of his family and past to keep him warm, and we see that even though the man was homeless he had genuine love, something Nakoshi is devoid of. The dichotomy of Nakoshi's former self and his current repressed self offers us a look into the power of guilt and regret and how one must live with the choices they have made, as sometimes they are unchangeable. He heads back into society to face his distortions and flaws all reflecting him, such as a woman who shrinks when is not given attention, feeling ignored by the world, a woman with multiple legs to symbolize her promiscuous reliance on sex and outward appearance, and a man covered in glasses that reflects his desire to be seen as his true self and not with any preconceived notions or prejudice. One thing to remember within this manga is that everything is an exploration of self, and Nakoshi is discovering his own inner demons and faced with them as they appear in others as well. Some homunculi are easy to understand for him, perhaps Nakoshi realizes these flaws within himself more easily than others, which is a hint towards the exploration of trauma within the manga. We tend to repress trauma through methods of denial, dissociation, regression or even projection. Everyone copes differently and there is no fixed method of healing from trauma. And Homunculus shows us these subconscious emotions through the characterization of people like Nakoshi and Ito. Flicking back to Ito, Nakoshi meets with him again and we finally understand more about his character and him being a vessel of changing, spraying, and bubbling water. Ito is someone who is also repressed, his sexuality and how he allows the world to perceive him due to his father's influence. As a child, Ito experimented in cross-dressing whilst housing a pet guppy in his room. The sexuality of Ito is something much debated within the story, however, due to his upper-class upbringing, along with his father's high expectations for Ito's academic achievement, the understanding of his sexuality was sacrificed as a result. Initially, Ito's father wishes to exterminate Ito's exploration of self through taking away his guppy, whom he associated with Ito's experiments of cross-dressing, painting nails, and applying makeup to himself. However, overcome with guilt for the love of his boy, He simply could not follow through and goes to leave, but the cat is allowed into the room and attacks the fishbowl, resulting in the death of the fish accidentally from his father. This event is something that is repressed and traumatic for both Ito and his father, who decades later discuss it on what he believed was the truth. was his deathbed, surrounded by guilt and shame, and Ito breaks down in a flurry of tears. The guppy, also known as the Rainbow Fish, is the symbol of Ito's true personality, beautiful and colourful, and the death of that guppy, acting as a deterrent to his own identity, which is why many years later it is still associated within Ito, and Nakoshi sees it multiple times, swimming around deep inside of his water-formed body. Yet, in a somewhat confusing sequence, Nakoshi acts as a catalyst for Ito by kissing him after applying lipstick. I must admit this whole scene is the most confusing exchange within the entire manga, helped by the artistic choice of both men becoming dark silhouettes with barely any emotion on show. The resisting form of Ito takes the shape of his father, showing his internalized prejudice towards Ito's own alternative identity, something that Ito has grown to fall in line to. An interesting observation to make is that Ito is the catalyst for his own growth in a way, performing the trepanation on Nakoshi which in turn serves for Nakoshi to see within Ito, the kiss sparking that new sense of passion for Ito to uncover his true identity. This eventually leads to Nakoshi supplying Ito with a dress, wig, makeup and heels to wear in public. Ito is obviously hesitant at first but ultimately goes along with the process whilst cross-examining Nakoshi as usual about his own escapades with makeup. As the process finishes, the homunculus of Ito begins to take a real form and shape, showing us that this is closer to his true self, hidden under the layers. Ito and Nakoshi share a dialogue in the park, with the wind blowing and sun casting dynamic shadows around them. The most iconic panel within the manga, What Does It Mean To Be Human, prompts a discussion of what actually makes us real and what it means to exist. Nakoshi draws from his own experiences in life, having lived as an incredibly ugly person before his cosmetic surgery. Claiming form is to be human, form allows us to interact with reality and others, and all suffering has a direct origin of form. Once his face changed, he became noticed. However, it was a superficial lie. They saw his commodities and external assets. He still felt like an invisible man. The entire conversation gives us deep insight into Nakoshi's motives in wanting to become homeless, and why he is obsessed so much with smell and taste, such as shoes or sperm. It juxtaposes rational and emotional perspectives. with Ito favouring scientific approaches, whereas Nakoshi leans heavily on emotional responses and explores the nature of reality and perception, and raises existential questions such as what the actual proof of living is. Nakoshi has learnt in his life that appearance, wealth, sex, power all mean nothing to him. The only time he has ever felt alive, felt seen and arguably happy was with Nanako. One of my many takings from Homunculus is that unless we are able to peer into another person's soul, Their true form, their flaws, weaknesses, negative qualities, and appreciate them we can never truly love. There is no challenge loving the outwardly beautiful, it is no more than appreciating a pretty painting. However, if you connect deep enough with a person, a true fusion of souls is possible. Nanako is a woman Nakoshi dated before his plastic surgery, and subsequently the only other person than Ito who saw him for his true self. As Nakoshi became sullied by his disappointment in humanity, He began staring at the floor whenever walking outside until someone finally found him. Nanako, as we learn in little glimpses across the manga, was an incredibly physically ugly person like Nakoshi, yet she had the purest heart Nakoshi had ever experienced. He believed she could see her monculi, which basically means she could see other people's true selves. This is why Nakoshi became so in love with her, feeling seen by someone for once, Nanako depicting Nakoshi as a cloud in the sky, white and pure but unattainable. We learn the harrowing truth of Nakoshi's actions near the end, when he decided to abandon both Nanako and their unborn child, ruining Nanako forever. She lost the ability to see into people's hearts, the pain so unbearably raw for her that she ended up falling into a parallel of Nakoshi himself, getting severe cosmetic surgery to improve her appearance, sacrificing what made her unique. In fact, she changes herself so much and Nakoshi suppresses his past so thoroughly as well that even after meeting several times again, the pair can no longer coexist. firm if the other is even themselves. Such lost souls with shattered identities, stuck in a limbo of searching for purpose in life. Despite Nakoshi losing his ability to see homunculus thanks to the hole closing up, the new form of Nanako remains a changing face, morphing into all the women Nakoshi has ever slept with, yet none ever left a great impression upon him, only Nanako. This freaks him out, but I will return to Nanako's plot in just a little bit. Some of the most unsettling imagery in the entire manga occurs when Nakoshi embarks upon the mission to perform a self-trepanation, after his visions of Homunculus cease to exist, and Ito refuses to perform on him again. This is the beginning of the psychosis of Nakoshi, an unhealthy obsession settled. in, driving him to commit acts that could easily kill him as a result. Ito clearly outlines the dangers, yet Nakoshi steals the equipment and enters the public bathroom to perform the operation. The thrashing rain of the cold night gives an already eerie feeling, followed up by the haunting imitation of Amanda Fielding explained earlier. Nakoshi begins the incision by shaving and marking himself. Those with trypanophobia and hemophobia might feel their skin cruel as he injects himself with the anesthesia. and slices the skin letting the blood pour down his face. But by far the most harrowing panels occur as he drills into his skull, body contorting from the pain, buttocks clenching and blood pouring. The hole is reopened and Nakoshi looks insane. Comparing this man to the reserved hesitant one to this form of science originally is drastic. His obsession with the homunculus casting him into a darkness. This is the face of a crazy person, one who has experimented too much with the limits of his own mind, and as a result has become lost in reality and the subconscious. The vibration effects are actually trippy, spreading out like branches across the moon to symbolize his higher senses rebirth. After a recovery in his car, he ventures back into society again, the same crazed smile on his face, claiming everything is back to normal. An interesting phrase indeed, considering distortions used to be the pinnacle of terror for Nakoshi, now he has adapted, becoming more comfortable with them than actual reality. Up to now, Nanako and Nakoshi have been engaged in a cat and mouse game with the pursuit of truth, a complex narrative involving two complete liars who don't even recognize themselves. The latter volumes of the manga consist more heavily on Nanako, with frequent meetings between her and Nakoshi, symbolizing a period in his life that is fraught with unresolved emotional issues. Their relationship serves as a window into Nakoshi's former life, shedding light on the experiences and decisions that led to his current state of being. Understanding his connection with Nanako is essential for unraveling Nakoshi's complex psychological landscape. Up until a certain moment, I will analyze later on, Nakoshi is not completely sure that the woman he is speaking to is Nanako, due to the differences of physical appearance and personality, claiming that Nanako would never lie about anything. Nanako was someone completely pure-hearted, truthful and genuine, and Nakoshi still betrayed her love, dashing it to the floor in his own narcissistic superiority complex. He could not handle someone looking up to him due to his invisible life. The idea of someone needing him and appreciating his existence was disgusting to Nakoshi to the point it made him believe she must be even lower than him in worth. His immaturity and fear caused him to run, abandoning Nanako just three months after they began dating. Their interactions revealed deep emotional scars that Nakoshi carries. Nanako's presence in his memories and the impact of their relationship highlights the theme of love, loss and regret. These emotions are critical for understanding Nakoshi's behaviour and his current detachment from the world. Their relationship underscores the idea that unresolved emotional trauma can have a long-lasting effect on individuals'mental health and perception of reality. After their conversation in the car, a very interpersonal one using Nanako's face as an exploration of the self, Nakoshi hallucinates his physical surroundings. He sees his old face in Nanako, yet despite everything, He simply cannot remember that face and his interrogation of the self causes Nanako to run away, panicked and overwhelmed. He returns to the park and finds that Iso, a homeless man who took a distinct liking to Carboy, despite the warnings of his compulsive lying, has begun hiding away in his tent after a conflict with the local council about removing him from the area. He has begun feeding the crows, a contrast to his earlier character where he scorned their entire presence and this symbolizes a downturn in his mental state, falling into darkness. Nakoshi begins his selfish interrogation of Ito. I say selfish as everyone Nakoshi attempts to help uncover trauma ends up benefiting himself primarily. He uses a mirror to force Ito to envision his life in chronological order. It began rather successfully, but after the death of his wife, Ito became detached, a drinker, and violent. One interesting aspect of Nakoshi's character is his accent. His original one being unrefined, heavy on slang, colloquialisms and non-standard grammar. This accent seeped through his facade multiple times throughout the story, giving us hints at how he used to conduct his speech before joining the upper echelons of society. And this is something he shares with Ito the cook. In a drunken rage he attacked his coworker who mocked his accent, nothing major intended from the coworker but struck a traumatic nerve within Ito. Nakoshi himself is not so much a physically violent person, Yet he does become explosive whenever his past is associated with his present, such as the accent he attempted to bury deep within himself. We learn that Ito the cook abandoned his daughter after a year in prison, which is direct foreshadowing to one of the climactic reveals of the manga later on, involving Nakoshi and Nanako. He speaks directly about himself during this scene, which is incredibly emotional in its own right, as Ito comes to accept that he left his daughter despite her deepest love for him. Nakoshi tells him to find her once more and share a cake, fix the bond and this causes Ito to burst into more tears Expelling the crows that lurked upon his tent. The following day Ito relays to Nakoshi that the homunculus attaching to Nakoshi Himself are simply clumps of ego, medals that Nakoshi's subconscious can boast about having. Ito knows Nakoshi is selfish under his lairs Calling the homunculus manifestations of his own selfish demand. You see, Nakoshi wants to be seen, appreciated for his work He's a He does not truly care for those he is helping as they cannot see his heart and therefore they are simply tools for him to further his understanding of himself. Ito unfortunately falls victim to this egocentric mentality as just after the conversation, news arrives to Nakoshi that Ito had taken his own life. The hanging corpse of Ito is something that confuses and infuriates Nakoshi, as in his mind Ito had a place to return, somewhere that he could warm himself with the embers of company. Perhaps Nakoshi was envious of that option, which is why panic settles in that he has nowhere to go, and feels he must find a purpose before he truly has nothing. Finally, we see Nakoshi and Nanako's real faces after they connect once more over their shared past, the lies melting as the truth is unavoidable. They are hideous, conventionally ugly beings, and we learn that Nakoshi ran from Nanako and their child simply because of his selfish desires of not wanting to spend time with an ugly girl or seeing a clone of himself brought into the world, deciding to throw himself into the fake world. However, with his newfound ascension in perception, Nakoshi believes that he has found his calling, able to see into hearts again, he tries forcing Nanako to repair the bond he destroyed those years ago. It does not work this way though, Nanako sees a demon on Nakoshi's face, and it is true. Nakoshi is completely self-absorbed that everyone has become a tool for him to obtain more knowledge. He has not improved as a person, but declined. The only reason he is willing to look at Nanako now is due to her improved appearance, not that his soul has healed in some complex self-discovery, and she runs whilst his eyes depict black holes devoid of life. Nakoshi manages to manipulate Nanako into believing he can see people's hearts through a somewhat contrived and rushed scene where he breaks down her sugar daddy and convinces her to follow his wishes in performing a trepanation. This is where the manga takes another elusive step into the ambiguous, Nakoshi's freakish obsession on show again, his eyes lighting up as he performs the operation on her. He takes a distinct pleasure drilling her open as he truly believes this is a way forwards for humanity. the enlightenment of the self through barbaric procedure. His egotistic despicability finally becomes undeniable on full show as she transforms into Nakoshi's face and they begin making out. He is so aroused or pleased to see himself in someone else that he can literally have sex with that person, simply fucking himself in a literal representation of how much Nakoshi loves the self. His narcissism knows no bounds and transcends all other insecurities he possibly has. his disgust with society, any gender or any person, he places himself above them all. People get hurt by narcissists who use them for their own pleasure and just like Ito, Nanako suffers, a blood tumour spawning from the events. Nakoshi leaves her, blood beginning to seep through the bandages. We never know completely if she died but from my interpretation she did die soon after this as in the time skip he refers to her as not being able to get her to see him. As he goes out into the city, the Christmas jubilee is in full swing. All homunculi have now become him, a mirror he can see his face in, which represents the wide-scale issues of society as many share in his suffering in some way, twisted by the subconscious issues. It is a confusing, overwhelming and scary ending to that time, Nakoshi himself questioning where he even is, heaven or hell. Because in truth, this is the author's intention to show us how messed up Nakoshi is, if all the faces depict his shattered and broken self, it hammers home to the audience that he is the one who needs fixing, yet Nakoshi's ecstasy seemingly rejects the need for fixing, believing everything is better now the forms all have become him. We have a one year time skip in which we see the sociopathic Nakoshi has not changed in the slightest, living in his car with a shaved head and permanently covering his eye in order to see the homunculi. Ito arrives dressed in a feminine attire which rounds up the character arc for them. Again, I am not 100% certain whether Ito is meant to be transgender, although a lot of signs point to this, or possibly just a cross-dresser overall. Nakoshi takes off his covering, revealing even more holes in his head with a tired expression painted upon his face. This man is damaged beyond belief, giving up on hope and being seen by someone for his true self. This breaks Ito who clutches onto Nakoshi in a swell of guilt and regret for what they did to Nakoshi mentally. Nakoshi puts the drill to Ito's head, begging them to look at him, his true self. However, Ito repeats their sorrows over and over as police and a doctor approach from the road. It is implied Ito reported Nakoshi's location to the police, or they were just searching for him due to the murder of Nanako. But Nakoshi does not object to their arrival, smiling almost relieved by their presence. He steps out waving happily to see them as Iso cries in the car and the manga ends with him greeting them. I have seen many people be disappointed with the ending of this manga, however I quite enjoy it, even if it feels slightly rushed. But to me it encapsulates everything Nakoshi has and is and exhibits his delirious state of mind clear enough to the characters around him. Due to the ambiguous nature of this psychological thriller, multiple discussions are still active to this day consisting of what's, why's, who's and offering alternative interpretations which is really pleasing to see. Nakoshi never deserved redemption, he ruined a multitude of lives in his self-absorbed journey to be seen, he sexually assaulted a 17 year old girl, abandoned the love of his life due to her ugliness, and then it's implied he murdered her, negatively influenced others and was a lying dickhead. I have no sympathy for his character, no pathos is cast in my mind, and I believe we are meant to condemn not only Nakoshi, but the superficial society he was a part of. He became a monster to fight monsters. yet this does not excuse his actions. His utterly insane ending was anticlimactic, tragic of anything, but deserved. Ito was right to report him, as he was a criminal, simply put. Even if he didn't intend on murdering Nanako, his negligence and obsession with benefiting himself led to take the uncalculated risk knowing the dangers. The manga serves as a multi-layered lesson of how to deal with repressed trauma, and promotes the need for humans to understand each other thoroughly in order to love. Thanks for watching, this video took me an incredibly long time to make so I humbly ask if you enjoyed to leave a like and subscribe. I really do love this manga, it's artistic, psychological and philosophical value is clear to see which is why I wanted to get my thoughts out as clearly as possible. Of course I most likely miss things, I am far from a genius, so feel free to correct me on things you picked up on in the comments below. But until next time, have a good one people, peace out.

Going forwards, there will be heavy spoilers, so you have been warned. To make one thing completely clear going into this, Nakoshi, the 34-year-old protagonist, is a piece of trash. Whilst pursuing further understanding of the manga, I came across those who would try to justify the man's actions, claiming he was a product of society rather than one corrupt from within. However, anyone with a normal clutch to morality will agree his actions are irredeemable and at times evil.

Society has had a negative effect upon him, yet his operations are not direct causes of society, for not all those defeated by the swiping blows of society's talons would culminate into Nakoshi's evil actions. For some context, the main catalyst of the story is the procedure of trepanation, something that has existed for millennia, dating back to even the stone age. Put simply, it's a hole in your head without touching or damaging the brain, which would be the main difference to a lobotomy, which severs connections between the frontal cortex. Trepanation is not used in modern medical practice because well, it's kind of stupid.

However, in ancient times, it was used for a multitude of reasons. It has an interestingly diverse history, appearing in several cultures all aiming for similar things, such as relief from mental issues like headaches or epilepsy, or physical precautions of evacuating blood from one's head trauma. Most theory does seem rather baseless to modern society, considering how much they loved yapping about evil spirits inhabiting the brain. which we now define as mental health issues, but we can understand the thought process of these old-age doctors who had to work off pure vibes.

The practice of trepanation did eventually begin to dwindle as the associated benefits did not outweigh the seemingly high mortality rate, and therefore as a cure to mental illness it became slowly obsolete. In modern times, craniotomy acts as the evolved version of trepanation, which is only done after thorough analysis such as MRI scans of the brain, and typically replaces the removed part of the skull after operation is carried out. However, another reason trepanation was practiced in ancient history and voluntary methods to this day is to unlock the heightened senses of the brain, for our ancestors believed that the key to uncovering this was drilling random assholes into your skull to improve blood circulation and return it to a more active state, which newborn children are believed to possess.

Practitioners were under the belief that by expanding the mind's capabilities, capabilities, this would connect us to the higher beings, spirits and all that juju. There is no actual evidence to confirm that trepanning caused an increased consciousness or unlocked the potential of the brain. However, the procedure is still closely associated with these sentiments for some reason.

Think of the theory as simply reopening your mind manually, used mainly in occult circumstances by freaky believers outside of Orthodox science. Anyways, with that incredibly summarized background of trepanation, a subject in which I urge you to research yourself outside this video, we can begin the dive into this elusive media named Homunculus. Due to this manga being 15 volumes, an in-depth explanation of every volume would take several decades and because I have plans in 2094 of dropping dead, After giving a thorough inspection of Volume 1, I will be skipping two parts I consider most important for the understanding of the story. Susumu no Koshi is a homeless man living in his car parked between an upper-class hotel and a park filled with homeless campers. The contrast is an important motif throughout the story as it paints a nuanced impression of this man, who despite being homeless possesses a car and a suit and refuses to fall into the ranks of those who set up tents and cast aside their previous lives.

We learn later on that Nakoshi used to be part of a very powerful company that dealt in finances and investments and was a very wealthy individual. Yet despite his materialistic successes, freedom to envelop himself of in carnal desire, his feelings increasingly disconnected from society, which is something that he has felt his entire life, being a part of a fake world that offers no genuinity. From the sprinkled flashbacks of the former life we are shown this, and how he felt like an invisible wraith that no one would ever notice, and I will discuss that more in depth later on. Nakoshi is known as Carboy by the campers, and whilst he is welcome around them in a social setting, such as drinking or eating. They don't fully respect him as a person due to him being a compulsive liar.

The connection he possesses with his car is interesting, almost as if he has a bond with the vehicle such as one you'd have with another human, easily hearing the internal issues and fixing the car up in due time. You could definitely make the case that he has a stronger bond with his car than any human in his life anymore. He observes a homeless man feeding the pigeons and throwing a stone at a crow who attempts to indulge in the feast.

This is a rather on-the-nose metaphor for society and how only certain individuals are permitted access to the finer qualities of life and others are treated as outlaws, the crow retreating back to the cold dead branches up above. Nakoshi delivers many different stories of his origins and happenings in life to the homeless people in the park and they realize he is a liar but tolerate him due to the free alcohol he provides. One panel I really enjoyed was Nakoshi's comment on human behavior with the effective line art to depict his serious tone.

Amonculus is a manga about breaking out of the monotonous processes of society and Nakoshi is shown to be someone who understands this should be a universal ambition from very early on. From a near distance he is observed by a strange man with tattoos and rings implying some sort of cultist or alternative lifestyle but more on him later. After Nakoshi returns from a trip to the sea, something he does often, he realizes he is finally out of money and panics about what this will mean for the future.

This desperation is the main ingredient the strange man needs, who returns with a wrapping of the window. Manabu Ito is easily my favourite designed character within the manga and potentially my favourite character altogether, for his rebellious, fascinating style develops and evolves as the story progresses in a healthy way about discovering one's true self. At first his incredibly large nose was something of a shock to me, but eventually I did get used to it.

Not any real analytical purpose mentioning that, Just a basic observation I had. Ito analyzes the situation of Nakoshi and offers an easy means of acquiring cash that Nakoshi would need. Trepanation. I've already explained the essence of trepanation at the beginning, but ultimately Nakoshi brushes the man away as a crazy cultist and tells him to get someone else to be his guinea pig. Although he objects to being homeless, we see Ito's intellect shine through, easily noticing that when Nakoshi lies, the left side of his mouth rises.

The mysterious man leaves with the wind at his back. back, however when the next day arrives and Nakoshi's car is towed away, his desperation finally overcomes his nonchalant demeanor and caves into the offer from Ito, who seemingly manipulated events to achieve Nakoshi's consent. Ito explains he studies human beings through all sorts of avenues such as medical, psychological and occult. Ito is someone who pursues knowledge of all forms related to the human condition and understanding the mind is his current obsession. They agree to begin the operation tomorrow and Nakoshi sleeps in the car.

the hotel room, once again in a fetal position. This is another running motif throughout the manga and shows his desire to protect himself from being hurt by the outside world and gives him a sense of comfort. Ito picks up Nakoshi on a sick-ass motorbike and they arrive at his lab where mountains of books and research is stored, along with an actual skull. As they begin, Ito discusses the common practice of trepanning throughout history in some menial attempts to calm Nakoshi's potential nerves and even boasts about his above-average talent.

as a doctor. The first gruesome imagery is shown as Ito drills into Nakoshi's head, blood splattering and his body contorting from the pain despite the anesthetic numbing it slightly. On the wall there is a creepy woman's face that returns many times throughout the story, which is actually an interpretation of an authentic example of trepanation. Amanda Fielding carried out this procedure in 1970 after becoming obsessed with expanding her consciousness and images and even video footage exist to this day should you wish to look for it. The uncanny image on the wall is meant to make us feel a sense of unease at the whole basis of trepanning.

Ito describes more of the scientific reasons behind why it would improve one's consciousness, however Nakoshi's pessimistic attitude kicks in once more, laying a joke on the young doctor about seeing things beyond the physical realm. Currently, we are meant to sympathize with Nakoshi's doubt that the premise of trepanation is nothing short of a ridiculous occult obsession. Whilst Nakoshi is alone, he begins filing through Ito's research and comes across some alarming records of past experiments involving trepanation. Cases of failure, mixed with psychosis, and even death put him on edge despite him claiming he didn't Believe it, his twitching body and raised lip betray his true thoughts. The next day, the two embark upon tests to see if the drilling has worked, however, Nakoshi remains adamant that no change has occurred, and they are simply wasting their time with silly paranormal investigations, and even if they did exist, he can't see them, nor does he actually care for it.

Nakoshi is self-absorbed, lacking empathy for others going into the story, happy to be contained to himself, and remaining pessimistic to other people and upper classes of society. He does uncover a pseudo-empathetic state thanks to the results of trepanation, which we shall see later, although it is slightly more complex than that as it still ends up serving himself. Ito makes it clear to Nakoshi that he intends to disprove the existence of the paranormal.

Due to him being a man of scientific background, it acts as a thorn in his side that any slight belief in this realm remains in his being. However, his fascination with the human being is what drives him to permanently extinguish any doubt or skepticism he may have. Ito conducts a basic intuition test with 25 cards containing five separate designs on every five cards and Nakoshi is tasked at selecting five of the same type of card.

He is requested to do this using purely the left side of his body as this is the side more associated with feeling rather than thought and for the first time we see the iconic hand over the eye move from Nakoshi. He manages to select four out of five of the star cards which calculated is a zero point sixteen chance of occurring with the basis being one of five chances happening four times in a row. This is clearly very impressive and shocks both Nakoshi and Iso, however Iso brushes it aside as inconclusive evidence as it must be repeated multiple times to be authentic.

As the associates depart for the night, the true mystery of this manga finally reveals itself. After rubbing his eye whilst looking at people, Nakoshi's perception of reality begins to change. At first he sees a man without his whole head, part of it missing as if it never even existed, then a rather large man who, when closing his right eye, becomes as thin as paper wavering in the wind. And rightfully so, this shocks Nakoshi, someone who has not often displayed much emotion to this stage, lost in bewilderment at what is happening in front of him. The art of the double spreads is fascinating, almost a Where's Waldo type of shot, with multiple freaks of reality on show, people split in half, walking upside down, tree branches and leaves for a body.

a girl whose body is split into multiple sectors, and finally a robot. Accidentally spilling his drink on a Yakuza boss's suit, Nakoshi is in for a beating, yet with his newfound power he realises the pinky of the robot is exposed and touches it. To everyone's shock, the boss flings backwards, crashing onto the floor.

That pisses off the boss even more, for reasons we find out later, and the robotic exterior slowly begins to disappear, revealing a weak boy inside the fortified suit. The shaking arm and saddened scared eyes increase in intensity as the boss approaches Nakoshi with the intent of severing his pinky with a knife. However, from Nakoshi's perspective, the child is simply cutting his own pinky off with a sickle. If you are confused, I shall explain.

The boss harbors deep trauma after an incident resulting in his friend losing their pinky, and this is something that strongly affected the boss, leading him to take his trauma out on others, causing more pain. as a result of his guilt, the robotic armor being a symbol of his hard outer shell, yet easily broken down when specific strings are pulled, such as the pinky and the sickle. The boss begins spontaneously crying, tears flooding his face without knowing exactly why. Nakoshi lets go of the boss and, embarrassed at his sudden waterworks retreats away, leaving Nakoshi sweating and confused at the mindfuck that just happened.

Admittedly, on my first read, I was completely lost as well. But of course it becomes clearer as the story progresses, or so you think. One gripe I had with the manga initially was its ambiguity and rather contradictory approach, defining something then shattering your perception of said definition.

But eventually I grew to love the winding turns as we discovered Nakoshi's self at the same rate he himself did. One of the more obvious visions Nakoshi sees is a man with the head of a penis. You don't have to be a genius to understand the implications of this. and is certainly a nod towards just what Nakoshi is seeing in other people.

Returning to the homeless area, as he pisses, Eater the cook joins him and we see that a metallic shiny reflective egg contains the man and this one confused me even more apart from the inference it was meant to represent being protected or shielded away from prying eyes. Nakoshi is pretty beaten up over the visions and sleeps trembling from the shock and cold. The next day, Nakoshi explains his visions and Iso reads on, fascinated, some amazing panels that show his intensity as he begins questioning Nakoshi for commonality amongst the visions.

The restaurant contains these strange monsters as well, from a man with the body of a man who has been killed by a man. of an ostrich to a man made of a melting candle and Ito, being the genius he is, begins to uncover the truth after conducting a little experiment with a woman who seemed to have no neck. This was quite an obvious indicator to myself that the visions had some sort of relation to trauma or issues of the mind as the neck that appeared was clearly mangled and disfigured implying trauma to that area via strangling and therefore it made sense for the woman to appear with no neck as she subconsciously tries to protect herself. Later on, Nakoshi continues seeing odd forms and unexplainable sights.

Ito phones Nakoshi to tell him he has solved everything, claiming the monsters he is seeing are homunculus. Nakoshi assumes Ito is just chatting out his ass, his narcissistic attitude that humans simply attempt to appear smart is showing, but we finally see some of Nakoshi's inner trauma come to the surface when he remembers an old friend named Ken. The artwork to depict the brain's functionality is absolutely incredible and probably my favourite art by Yamamoto. and a skateboard flashes across his mind, causing his face to drastically surrender to what seems like shame or guilt.

Volume 1 ends with Nakoshi speeding off under a new impression he isn't going insane. The initial volume may appear a confusing mess of mumbo jumbo, however, the introduction to this psychological story was never going to be easy, which is why I found it necessary to explain in a bit more depth going into it. Now we have the basis understood, we can analyze the story of Homunculus and what it means to be human.

The definition of a homunculus is a little humanoid creature, however in a field closer to neurology, a sensory homunculus is a touch map of how we perceive things, with different proportions corresponding to the importance of the specific sense. and fingers, lips and tongue, eyes and ears, all of these different senses are felt in the brain as well, which transfer from the area of effect. What Nakoshi sees are distortions of the soul, as explained by Ito, things people have suppressed deep in their subconscious, mental and emotional trauma within them, on show to someone who can peer into the mind of others.

Ito explains his theory with all subjects viewed by Nakoshi, and it appears to make complete sense, however things change eventually. As we learn, every single homunculus Nakoshi sees are simply a reflection of his own trauma and pain, manifesting into other people as well. Everything he sees is part of his own subconscious viewing of himself, his two-faced duplicity, his guilt, his regret, shame, emptiness, contempt, fear, anger, self-protection, and narcissism.

Nakoshi is a man who underwent severe plastic surgery and threw away everything he had to experience a new life. By doing this he lost the last part of himself that made him feel special or loved. Still harbouring a deep disdain towards humanity and his own past, he moved on like a wraith in the shadows, destroying lives without a second thought in his business until karma eventually caught up with him.

It was during the days after his plastic surgery he begun consuming his own semen in menial attempts of tasting, smelling and feeling like life still coursed through his veins. It is a very disgusting yet desperate attempt that also reinforces his self-absorption, his own product being the only thing he needs to sustain himself. No one could ever give him a buzz, not in the world he deemed to be fake.

We see the first sign of his newfound purpose of curing homunculi before he is even aware of what they are, after meeting again with the Yakuza boss and breaking him down by discussing his past trauma involving slicing his friend's pinky off with a sickle. However, this resonates so deeply within Nakoshi. as he experienced the same exact thing, accidentally pushing his friend Ken into oncoming traffic and fleeing the scene in panic.

He opens up to the Yakuza boss as he cries for his own guilt, claiming he chose to remove himself from friendships in favour of a lonely existence, purely to protect his own weak mind from taking more pain and regret for his thoughtless actions. Initially, we experience sympathy for our protagonist, it is only natural after all, whilst his morality has been painted as somewhat ambiguous, He has done nothing out of spite or genuine evil and therefore we feel sorry for his sorrowful life. However, the cracks do begin to show as soon as he gets out of the situation he begins laughing, cackling even at the perceived patheticness of the Yakuza boss.

But this quickly faced the tears and pain for Nakoshi who can't escape his regret for Ken screaming and crying at his mistake. The Sand Gull or Symbol Gull is where Nakoshi's despicable nature is for me completely solidified. as being an irredeemable piece of trash.

We are introduced to the girl who is 17 years of age after Nakoshi spots her to be a homunculus. The girl works at a schoolgirl underwear modeling company, which is fucked up enough as it is, but Japan is Japan, I guess, and technically not prostitution, which the manga beats us around the head enough with. Nakoshi inspects the girl who appears to be a Full body shape-shifting sand model, altering her design to whichever mold she needs to fit. The initial meeting scene is rather uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons, involving the girl presenting her nether regions in attempt to seduce Nakoshi, or at least her subconscious thoughts are surrounding that. A face appears spouting lewd commentary and thankfully Nakoshi gets creeped out and leaves.

The two pursue the girl however and Ito becomes fixated on the way to defeat her Monculus by destroying her fixed routine. So they intercept her during her usual action of shoplifting as Nakoshi watches from afar, analyzing her altering state. Ito says she is carrying around a heart that is as dry as a desert, with no real clue of what the real her looks like. On a reread, it is so blatantly obvious how much these homunculus relate to Nakoshi, who literally cannot even remember his own face before the surgery and feels nothing in his heart such as drive or ambition. Despite multiple attempts to find herself, she is left in this void still of nothing, a failure and unknowing of where she belongs in the world, shown through her easily changing figure.

When Ito has the girl in his clutches, he forces her to answer questions about herself, all whilst focusing on his middle finger, which is on the left side of her body, in order to promote her to feel, rather than think. The girl answers vaguely, using labels and roles in society to define her, something Ito denies as being her true expression. and presses on intensely to unearth her true self.

Eventually she has no answer, she is just her, and Ito claims she is scared to realize her true potential and self, living her life by the book her parents forced upon her, molding her to their own wishes rather than her own. Due to this oppression, she developed rebellious tendencies to escape her mother's control, but again this is not her true self, just uninspired attempts of appearing different. Ito then strikes, saying to find her true self she must destroy all manuals, all rulebooks and do something forbidden, such as sex.

At this point, the girl's homunculus has been destroyed, slowly rebuilding itself to the words of Ito, the one thing her parents have not included in their rulebook being sexuality. This is how to break her pattern and it may seem rather predatory, but Ito concludes it is the only way. The two get closer, all whilst Nakoshi watches on, however we see cracks in even Ito's form, that being a water vessel with no real appearance to showcase his lack of acceptance. of his true self. Water gushes out as Ito being human as well feels fear and ends up fleeing the scene of the girl who begins consuming him such as applying the lipstick.

Whilst it is not made abundantly clear, Ito is either gay, transgender or simply a cross-dresser, the focal point of his story is accepting his true identity which is hinted regularly as not being just a rebellious style of clothing he decides to wear. We see later on that Ito is someone with deep emotional repression due to his father's influence. who condemn the cross-dressing he did as a child. Ito's relationship with Nakoshi is central to understanding his sexuality.

There are moments in the manga that suggest Ito may have developed feelings for Nakoshi beyond mere scientific curiosity, such as the physical closeness of some of their scenes, such as when Nakoshi forces Ito to wear a dress, makeup and wig. This moment in fact acts as the main catalyst for Ito to indulge in his true identity, which was often depicted as something fluid and changing through his homunculus, as shown through water that bubbled and altered as time went on. Of course, this also reflects Nakoshi's own sexual fluidity, hinting at his own sexual repressions.

However, I feel it is far more appropriate to assume Nakoshi's narcissism results in him being aroused and attracted to himself. The main evidence to reinforce this being the fact he frequently consumes his own semen, alongside having sexual intercourse with Nanako. At the end, her face turns into his own, and he passionately makes love to his own reflection.

It's practically the same as that one Meat Cannon video where Andrew Eater makes out with himself, like that's all I could think when reading this scene, and highlights his egotistic personality. But anyways, I digress. Nakoshi takes the young girl home in his car, and as they talk he realizes she is made up of symbols rather than sand, a monster of the current day, unable to express any genuine emotions, so she must rely on symbols to shape her. This is something he also notices in her text messages and emails on her phone.

A fraudulent amassing of emoticons that can plaster her empty emotions. The two characters then share a rather disturbing scene as the young girl consumes her own blood from self-harming, and Nakoshi debuts his semen eating. This whole sequence is sickening, especially as they parallel each other, obsessed with consuming their own liquids.

Whilst the author could just be attempting to stir a reaction through shock value, It does connect them, both lacking feeling within life, so they must rely on their own fluids to experience taste or an unhealthy rush. Sometime later, Nakoshi returns the phone to the girl, however, in an amalgamation of his disgust for her, he begins groping her breasts. eyes and face.

His sick twisted goal is to kill off her dreams of sex bringing her change, but stops eventually when he is once again bombarded by the symbols taking over him, like they did for Ito. The girl believes sex is a way to become her own person, as her mother constantly opposes her exploring this avenue of life, condemning it as filthy, dirty actions that she is far too young for. This has given the girl a false perception of what sex actually is, which is a common thing found in many young girls throughout society.

A strict or uneducated upbringing naturally inspires people to seek answers through external sources, and this can put them into very dangerous situations from people who wish to take control of these unknowingly. Nakoshi begins monologuing some creepy bullshit about fixing her with his own hands, and gropes her again, to which the girl, now panicked, repeats multiple times to let go of him. The entire scene is very uncomfortable, as an unhinged Nakoshi resorts to brutally violating and scaring the girl, Painted with a psychotic and evil face, using his power of homunculus as justification of him literally breaking the law and traumatizing her. We are meant to assume this is him talking to his own self, some form of inner reflection about how he wants others to feel alone like himself.

Yet the fact he needed to achieve this through this means is barbaric and inhumane, and completely detaches us from the relatability of the character and exhibits the beginning of Nakoshi's descent into unethical actions. In a sick and twisted way, the girl becomes human once more after Nakoshi chomps down on her skin and starts feasting on her wounds and blood. Cause this manga just continues to be fucked up.

He technically does vanquish her homunculus, yet in a disgusting way. The symbol homunculus transfers onto Nakoshi like the robotic arm did, to symbolize the connection he shares with the people he encounters, his superficial personality being shown through the symbols upon him. We get to see more of Nakoshi's backstory in which he slept with many girls using the same bored tricks on them to win their hand in sexual relations, yet he felt nothing of speciality, still obsessed with his own semen and how it smelt and tasted.

One time we see his genuine regret for his actions is when he encounters a taxi driver, a kind old man who used to have a high paying job but lost it after Nakoshi helped destroy the company. His face is painted with regret but he's not. body shaking and even tipping the man as a meagre attempt to pay back his shame.

He discovers the man ended up being homeless, with images of his family and past to keep him warm, and we see that even though the man was homeless he had genuine love, something Nakoshi is devoid of. The dichotomy of Nakoshi's former self and his current repressed self offers us a look into the power of guilt and regret and how one must live with the choices they have made, as sometimes they are unchangeable. He heads back into society to face his distortions and flaws all reflecting him, such as a woman who shrinks when is not given attention, feeling ignored by the world, a woman with multiple legs to symbolize her promiscuous reliance on sex and outward appearance, and a man covered in glasses that reflects his desire to be seen as his true self and not with any preconceived notions or prejudice. One thing to remember within this manga is that everything is an exploration of self, and Nakoshi is discovering his own inner demons and faced with them as they appear in others as well.

Some homunculi are easy to understand for him, perhaps Nakoshi realizes these flaws within himself more easily than others, which is a hint towards the exploration of trauma within the manga. We tend to repress trauma through methods of denial, dissociation, regression or even projection. Everyone copes differently and there is no fixed method of healing from trauma.

And Homunculus shows us these subconscious emotions through the characterization of people like Nakoshi and Ito. Flicking back to Ito, Nakoshi meets with him again and we finally understand more about his character and him being a vessel of changing, spraying, and bubbling water. Ito is someone who is also repressed, his sexuality and how he allows the world to perceive him due to his father's influence.

As a child, Ito experimented in cross-dressing whilst housing a pet guppy in his room. The sexuality of Ito is something much debated within the story, however, due to his upper-class upbringing, along with his father's high expectations for Ito's academic achievement, the understanding of his sexuality was sacrificed as a result. Initially, Ito's father wishes to exterminate Ito's exploration of self through taking away his guppy, whom he associated with Ito's experiments of cross-dressing, painting nails, and applying makeup to himself. However, overcome with guilt for the love of his boy, He simply could not follow through and goes to leave, but the cat is allowed into the room and attacks the fishbowl, resulting in the death of the fish accidentally from his father.

This event is something that is repressed and traumatic for both Ito and his father, who decades later discuss it on what he believed was the truth. was his deathbed, surrounded by guilt and shame, and Ito breaks down in a flurry of tears. The guppy, also known as the Rainbow Fish, is the symbol of Ito's true personality, beautiful and colourful, and the death of that guppy, acting as a deterrent to his own identity, which is why many years later it is still associated within Ito, and Nakoshi sees it multiple times, swimming around deep inside of his water-formed body. Yet, in a somewhat confusing sequence, Nakoshi acts as a catalyst for Ito by kissing him after applying lipstick.

I must admit this whole scene is the most confusing exchange within the entire manga, helped by the artistic choice of both men becoming dark silhouettes with barely any emotion on show. The resisting form of Ito takes the shape of his father, showing his internalized prejudice towards Ito's own alternative identity, something that Ito has grown to fall in line to. An interesting observation to make is that Ito is the catalyst for his own growth in a way, performing the trepanation on Nakoshi which in turn serves for Nakoshi to see within Ito, the kiss sparking that new sense of passion for Ito to uncover his true identity.

This eventually leads to Nakoshi supplying Ito with a dress, wig, makeup and heels to wear in public. Ito is obviously hesitant at first but ultimately goes along with the process whilst cross-examining Nakoshi as usual about his own escapades with makeup. As the process finishes, the homunculus of Ito begins to take a real form and shape, showing us that this is closer to his true self, hidden under the layers.

Ito and Nakoshi share a dialogue in the park, with the wind blowing and sun casting dynamic shadows around them. The most iconic panel within the manga, What Does It Mean To Be Human, prompts a discussion of what actually makes us real and what it means to exist. Nakoshi draws from his own experiences in life, having lived as an incredibly ugly person before his cosmetic surgery.

Claiming form is to be human, form allows us to interact with reality and others, and all suffering has a direct origin of form. Once his face changed, he became noticed. However, it was a superficial lie. They saw his commodities and external assets.

He still felt like an invisible man. The entire conversation gives us deep insight into Nakoshi's motives in wanting to become homeless, and why he is obsessed so much with smell and taste, such as shoes or sperm. It juxtaposes rational and emotional perspectives. with Ito favouring scientific approaches, whereas Nakoshi leans heavily on emotional responses and explores the nature of reality and perception, and raises existential questions such as what the actual proof of living is.

Nakoshi has learnt in his life that appearance, wealth, sex, power all mean nothing to him. The only time he has ever felt alive, felt seen and arguably happy was with Nanako. One of my many takings from Homunculus is that unless we are able to peer into another person's soul, Their true form, their flaws, weaknesses, negative qualities, and appreciate them we can never truly love. There is no challenge loving the outwardly beautiful, it is no more than appreciating a pretty painting.

However, if you connect deep enough with a person, a true fusion of souls is possible. Nanako is a woman Nakoshi dated before his plastic surgery, and subsequently the only other person than Ito who saw him for his true self. As Nakoshi became sullied by his disappointment in humanity, He began staring at the floor whenever walking outside until someone finally found him. Nanako, as we learn in little glimpses across the manga, was an incredibly physically ugly person like Nakoshi, yet she had the purest heart Nakoshi had ever experienced.

He believed she could see her monculi, which basically means she could see other people's true selves. This is why Nakoshi became so in love with her, feeling seen by someone for once, Nanako depicting Nakoshi as a cloud in the sky, white and pure but unattainable. We learn the harrowing truth of Nakoshi's actions near the end, when he decided to abandon both Nanako and their unborn child, ruining Nanako forever.

She lost the ability to see into people's hearts, the pain so unbearably raw for her that she ended up falling into a parallel of Nakoshi himself, getting severe cosmetic surgery to improve her appearance, sacrificing what made her unique. In fact, she changes herself so much and Nakoshi suppresses his past so thoroughly as well that even after meeting several times again, the pair can no longer coexist. firm if the other is even themselves. Such lost souls with shattered identities, stuck in a limbo of searching for purpose in life.

Despite Nakoshi losing his ability to see homunculus thanks to the hole closing up, the new form of Nanako remains a changing face, morphing into all the women Nakoshi has ever slept with, yet none ever left a great impression upon him, only Nanako. This freaks him out, but I will return to Nanako's plot in just a little bit. Some of the most unsettling imagery in the entire manga occurs when Nakoshi embarks upon the mission to perform a self-trepanation, after his visions of Homunculus cease to exist, and Ito refuses to perform on him again.

This is the beginning of the psychosis of Nakoshi, an unhealthy obsession settled. in, driving him to commit acts that could easily kill him as a result. Ito clearly outlines the dangers, yet Nakoshi steals the equipment and enters the public bathroom to perform the operation.

The thrashing rain of the cold night gives an already eerie feeling, followed up by the haunting imitation of Amanda Fielding explained earlier. Nakoshi begins the incision by shaving and marking himself. Those with trypanophobia and hemophobia might feel their skin cruel as he injects himself with the anesthesia. and slices the skin letting the blood pour down his face.

But by far the most harrowing panels occur as he drills into his skull, body contorting from the pain, buttocks clenching and blood pouring. The hole is reopened and Nakoshi looks insane. Comparing this man to the reserved hesitant one to this form of science originally is drastic.

His obsession with the homunculus casting him into a darkness. This is the face of a crazy person, one who has experimented too much with the limits of his own mind, and as a result has become lost in reality and the subconscious. The vibration effects are actually trippy, spreading out like branches across the moon to symbolize his higher senses rebirth.

After a recovery in his car, he ventures back into society again, the same crazed smile on his face, claiming everything is back to normal. An interesting phrase indeed, considering distortions used to be the pinnacle of terror for Nakoshi, now he has adapted, becoming more comfortable with them than actual reality. Up to now, Nanako and Nakoshi have been engaged in a cat and mouse game with the pursuit of truth, a complex narrative involving two complete liars who don't even recognize themselves.

The latter volumes of the manga consist more heavily on Nanako, with frequent meetings between her and Nakoshi, symbolizing a period in his life that is fraught with unresolved emotional issues. Their relationship serves as a window into Nakoshi's former life, shedding light on the experiences and decisions that led to his current state of being. Understanding his connection with Nanako is essential for unraveling Nakoshi's complex psychological landscape. Up until a certain moment, I will analyze later on, Nakoshi is not completely sure that the woman he is speaking to is Nanako, due to the differences of physical appearance and personality, claiming that Nanako would never lie about anything. Nanako was someone completely pure-hearted, truthful and genuine, and Nakoshi still betrayed her love, dashing it to the floor in his own narcissistic superiority complex.

He could not handle someone looking up to him due to his invisible life. The idea of someone needing him and appreciating his existence was disgusting to Nakoshi to the point it made him believe she must be even lower than him in worth. His immaturity and fear caused him to run, abandoning Nanako just three months after they began dating.

Their interactions revealed deep emotional scars that Nakoshi carries. Nanako's presence in his memories and the impact of their relationship highlights the theme of love, loss and regret. These emotions are critical for understanding Nakoshi's behaviour and his current detachment from the world.

Their relationship underscores the idea that unresolved emotional trauma can have a long-lasting effect on individuals'mental health and perception of reality. After their conversation in the car, a very interpersonal one using Nanako's face as an exploration of the self, Nakoshi hallucinates his physical surroundings. He sees his old face in Nanako, yet despite everything, He simply cannot remember that face and his interrogation of the self causes Nanako to run away, panicked and overwhelmed.

He returns to the park and finds that Iso, a homeless man who took a distinct liking to Carboy, despite the warnings of his compulsive lying, has begun hiding away in his tent after a conflict with the local council about removing him from the area. He has begun feeding the crows, a contrast to his earlier character where he scorned their entire presence and this symbolizes a downturn in his mental state, falling into darkness. Nakoshi begins his selfish interrogation of Ito. I say selfish as everyone Nakoshi attempts to help uncover trauma ends up benefiting himself primarily.

He uses a mirror to force Ito to envision his life in chronological order. It began rather successfully, but after the death of his wife, Ito became detached, a drinker, and violent. One interesting aspect of Nakoshi's character is his accent.

His original one being unrefined, heavy on slang, colloquialisms and non-standard grammar. This accent seeped through his facade multiple times throughout the story, giving us hints at how he used to conduct his speech before joining the upper echelons of society. And this is something he shares with Ito the cook. In a drunken rage he attacked his coworker who mocked his accent, nothing major intended from the coworker but struck a traumatic nerve within Ito.

Nakoshi himself is not so much a physically violent person, Yet he does become explosive whenever his past is associated with his present, such as the accent he attempted to bury deep within himself. We learn that Ito the cook abandoned his daughter after a year in prison, which is direct foreshadowing to one of the climactic reveals of the manga later on, involving Nakoshi and Nanako. He speaks directly about himself during this scene, which is incredibly emotional in its own right, as Ito comes to accept that he left his daughter despite her deepest love for him.

Nakoshi tells him to find her once more and share a cake, fix the bond and this causes Ito to burst into more tears Expelling the crows that lurked upon his tent. The following day Ito relays to Nakoshi that the homunculus attaching to Nakoshi Himself are simply clumps of ego, medals that Nakoshi's subconscious can boast about having. Ito knows Nakoshi is selfish under his lairs Calling the homunculus manifestations of his own selfish demand. You see, Nakoshi wants to be seen, appreciated for his work He's a He does not truly care for those he is helping as they cannot see his heart and therefore they are simply tools for him to further his understanding of himself. Ito unfortunately falls victim to this egocentric mentality as just after the conversation, news arrives to Nakoshi that Ito had taken his own life.

The hanging corpse of Ito is something that confuses and infuriates Nakoshi, as in his mind Ito had a place to return, somewhere that he could warm himself with the embers of company. Perhaps Nakoshi was envious of that option, which is why panic settles in that he has nowhere to go, and feels he must find a purpose before he truly has nothing. Finally, we see Nakoshi and Nanako's real faces after they connect once more over their shared past, the lies melting as the truth is unavoidable.

They are hideous, conventionally ugly beings, and we learn that Nakoshi ran from Nanako and their child simply because of his selfish desires of not wanting to spend time with an ugly girl or seeing a clone of himself brought into the world, deciding to throw himself into the fake world. However, with his newfound ascension in perception, Nakoshi believes that he has found his calling, able to see into hearts again, he tries forcing Nanako to repair the bond he destroyed those years ago. It does not work this way though, Nanako sees a demon on Nakoshi's face, and it is true.

Nakoshi is completely self-absorbed that everyone has become a tool for him to obtain more knowledge. He has not improved as a person, but declined. The only reason he is willing to look at Nanako now is due to her improved appearance, not that his soul has healed in some complex self-discovery, and she runs whilst his eyes depict black holes devoid of life.

Nakoshi manages to manipulate Nanako into believing he can see people's hearts through a somewhat contrived and rushed scene where he breaks down her sugar daddy and convinces her to follow his wishes in performing a trepanation. This is where the manga takes another elusive step into the ambiguous, Nakoshi's freakish obsession on show again, his eyes lighting up as he performs the operation on her. He takes a distinct pleasure drilling her open as he truly believes this is a way forwards for humanity.

the enlightenment of the self through barbaric procedure. His egotistic despicability finally becomes undeniable on full show as she transforms into Nakoshi's face and they begin making out. He is so aroused or pleased to see himself in someone else that he can literally have sex with that person, simply fucking himself in a literal representation of how much Nakoshi loves the self. His narcissism knows no bounds and transcends all other insecurities he possibly has. his disgust with society, any gender or any person, he places himself above them all.

People get hurt by narcissists who use them for their own pleasure and just like Ito, Nanako suffers, a blood tumour spawning from the events. Nakoshi leaves her, blood beginning to seep through the bandages. We never know completely if she died but from my interpretation she did die soon after this as in the time skip he refers to her as not being able to get her to see him. As he goes out into the city, the Christmas jubilee is in full swing.

All homunculi have now become him, a mirror he can see his face in, which represents the wide-scale issues of society as many share in his suffering in some way, twisted by the subconscious issues. It is a confusing, overwhelming and scary ending to that time, Nakoshi himself questioning where he even is, heaven or hell. Because in truth, this is the author's intention to show us how messed up Nakoshi is, if all the faces depict his shattered and broken self, it hammers home to the audience that he is the one who needs fixing, yet Nakoshi's ecstasy seemingly rejects the need for fixing, believing everything is better now the forms all have become him. We have a one year time skip in which we see the sociopathic Nakoshi has not changed in the slightest, living in his car with a shaved head and permanently covering his eye in order to see the homunculi.

Ito arrives dressed in a feminine attire which rounds up the character arc for them. Again, I am not 100% certain whether Ito is meant to be transgender, although a lot of signs point to this, or possibly just a cross-dresser overall. Nakoshi takes off his covering, revealing even more holes in his head with a tired expression painted upon his face. This man is damaged beyond belief, giving up on hope and being seen by someone for his true self. This breaks Ito who clutches onto Nakoshi in a swell of guilt and regret for what they did to Nakoshi mentally.

Nakoshi puts the drill to Ito's head, begging them to look at him, his true self. However, Ito repeats their sorrows over and over as police and a doctor approach from the road. It is implied Ito reported Nakoshi's location to the police, or they were just searching for him due to the murder of Nanako. But Nakoshi does not object to their arrival, smiling almost relieved by their presence. He steps out waving happily to see them as Iso cries in the car and the manga ends with him greeting them.

I have seen many people be disappointed with the ending of this manga, however I quite enjoy it, even if it feels slightly rushed. But to me it encapsulates everything Nakoshi has and is and exhibits his delirious state of mind clear enough to the characters around him. Due to the ambiguous nature of this psychological thriller, multiple discussions are still active to this day consisting of what's, why's, who's and offering alternative interpretations which is really pleasing to see. Nakoshi never deserved redemption, he ruined a multitude of lives in his self-absorbed journey to be seen, he sexually assaulted a 17 year old girl, abandoned the love of his life due to her ugliness, and then it's implied he murdered her, negatively influenced others and was a lying dickhead. I have no sympathy for his character, no pathos is cast in my mind, and I believe we are meant to condemn not only Nakoshi, but the superficial society he was a part of.

He became a monster to fight monsters. yet this does not excuse his actions. His utterly insane ending was anticlimactic, tragic of anything, but deserved. Ito was right to report him, as he was a criminal, simply put. Even if he didn't intend on murdering Nanako, his negligence and obsession with benefiting himself led to take the uncalculated risk knowing the dangers.

The manga serves as a multi-layered lesson of how to deal with repressed trauma, and promotes the need for humans to understand each other thoroughly in order to love. Thanks for watching, this video took me an incredibly long time to make so I humbly ask if you enjoyed to leave a like and subscribe. I really do love this manga, it's artistic, psychological and philosophical value is clear to see which is why I wanted to get my thoughts out as clearly as possible. Of course I most likely miss things, I am far from a genius, so feel free to correct me on things you picked up on in the comments below. But until next time, have a good one people, peace out.

Transcript for:Exploring Trauma and Identity in Homunculus

Transcript for:
Exploring Trauma and Identity in Homunculus