temu is an awful place where you can get a roasted pig plush or a fart Plug beer belly fanny pack insect Co mask Nick Cage towel Camala Harris M foul Shrek tooth Bas dispenser cat butle calendar plumpy wolf under M puppet that you can kiss the rock as an octopus and fist gelatin white fungus white fungus is that food yes I regret to inform you that temu serves food now and yes we are in full-blown societal collapse and I was curious about two things is it legal and what timu food tastes like uh so I ordered some but there's just Oneal problem I forgot what bulk means so so we're going to try it all and I'm going to die of a foodborn illness that the Western hemisphere has not even discovered yet I am your labat I am your guinea pig I will test this for you so you never have to buy anything on [ __ ] u.com again I'm going to try these in order of most familiar to less familiar like fish gelatin and white fungus start oh my God knockoff Oreos why are they Wicked colored is your cookie green I can't say that what if I did a reverse nikocado avocado and just became morbidly obese all right let me translate this thanks okay so we know it's it's Oreo okay it looks like a regular Oreo are you [ __ ] kidding me how the [ __ ] does that look like it you didn't even try the food coloring see if this was America this [ __ ] would have been so green it would have been radioactive you put you would have put a [ __ ] Geer counter next to it it would be wait a minute oh so forgot there's a little [ __ ] Peach and a grape on the packaging which I could have seen with my eyeballs that was good eight out of 10 all right let's pick a Savory snack a Savory SN snack oh what the [ __ ] all right we got Doritos cup Style baby [ __ ] a bag the flavor smoked cheese these are Japanese I think they're like Doritos rolled up in a little tiny blunt okay let me take a [ __ ] hit of [Music] this I actually inhaled like cheddar dust it is called smoked cheese oh wait it has a strange aftertaste there's a there's a little something else in there that they that the Western tongue is not ready for the shape is kind of weird it has a weird aftertaste I don't know why the [ __ ] it's in a cup it's not terrible Doritos cup style gets a 6.5 out of 10 all right let's go back to a sweet this looks [ __ ] crazy this looks like RFK Junior's worst nightmare rainbow great rainbow Skittles with a all right rainbow oh they're squishy are they like like gummy Skittles I am getting type one two and I'm going to make [ __ ] number three diabetes tonight see now I'm getting [ __ ] mad cuz I hate TAMU with all my guts and they should not be selling food but are so good may contain fish and krill I don't love that part I can't believe it but this [ __ ] is in 9.5 this is [ __ ] gas all right before my lactate Runs Out so I'm not quite sure who the robot is who's about to beat the [ __ ] out of chest or the cheetah but let's [Music] translate [ __ ] useless uh so these are called Hilo strange name Ultram man corn on the cob steak flavor G lot to unpack there uh I don't like the smile I don't like the smell smell that [ __ ] oh well so you're on my iPad actually and you can't smell that they look like Cheetos with depression they look of white people gentrified the hot Cheeto this also looks kind of blunt smoke way bra it's so sweet which is weird cuz I just ate like the sweetest candy ever this [ __ ] still tastes sweet I don't love it it tastes like if you dusted like a piece of steak in icing sugar Cheetos Ultram man corn on the cob strange flavor steak flavor three out of 10 all right I've been surviving so far I feel like going crazy oh [ __ ] my life durian durian is supposedly like a really stinky [ __ ] fruit but tastes really good like everyone's like yeah it tastes like decaying bodies and [ __ ] out of an ass but once you take a bite of it it's so good which just never exactly sold it for me this is from Thailand it has a warning saying consuming this product can expose you to chemicals including lead I really hope this doesn't like stink up my [ __ ] house like doesn't smell bad did they like suck the fart out of it or something like I'm confused W it is so interesting like kind of tastes like cheesy in a strange way you know what I'm going to give this like a [ __ ] 8 out of 10 now I hope you know that this has all just been like fun little snacks so far [ __ ] we have Horrors coming up like what the [ __ ] is chicken meat floss I I do feel a stomach ache coming on I cannot lie to you let's try a drink it says this is a product of Taiwan okay I'd rather hit an elf bar again oh my [ __ ] God okay just broke my fingernail do Taiwanese people have [ __ ] Eagle toal to open these cans like what is going on wo the ingredients are Lally just water grass sugar and honey the Jelly's like stuck in the can you designed this [ __ ] this is terrible this is like an evil potion it almost tastes like a Thai iced tea there is some jelly at the bottom here okay let's eat tastes like Bulbasaur just spored in my mouth I hated that I'm going to give this a a 6 out of 10 y'all I feel so like I'm going to go to bed and try and sleep away the stomach ache but I know it's for breakfast good morning tation we got more to eat we got knockoff Lays but they're la la L LA says it's Nori seaweed flavor we got we got Sushi [ __ ] La chips these really smell like the ocean um they taste like if you made a chip out of like one piece of sushi good going to give the knockoff lays 7 out of 10 all right that was a nice little breakfast but it's time to try something scary this [ __ ] does not even have English on it thick dried tofu ginai Bean products are popular all over the world 1.5 billion packages it's kind of cute it's like one little baby tofu oh it smells like ass I have seen this in a public toilet before do I have to cook this no it's a said snack snack sounds like it you [Music] just oh God zero zero out of 10 I'm really not giving Wan as much as I should be right now what the [ __ ] is that what bell roll seaweed flavor 3 seconds oh god what the [ __ ] it says soybean I don't think it needs to be cooked it's not refrigerated [Music] so oh my [ __ ] God that was so disgusting it tastes like oily plastic like if you deep fried like an iPhone battery that's what this [ __ ] tastes like uh negative one out of 10 this looks safe okay these are Taiwanese no these are Kobe that's my [ __ ] dog's name no no no no well there's no actual meat in these thank God God I feel so conflicted also what the [ __ ] is Kobe flavor other than the basketball player or my dog I don't understand what the like what is the third Kobe they smell kind of good okay wait a minute oh maybe that's gas oh maybe that's so [ __ ] good that's that [ __ ] I don't care if I'm eating my dog Kobe LS 9 out of 10 but since that was good that means I have to eat something nasty now this [ __ ] straight up has zero English on the packaging so wakame section Yan Dion fresh like is this fish it's a little translucent this morning I was craving wakame from the Yellow Sea so I ordered it off of TAMU cuz I don't know how to cook for [ __ ] or even go to the grocery store oh god what the [ __ ] is that I used to be a piggy eater but I got over it and this [ __ ] is setting me back like [ __ ] 10 years once again do I have to cook this like I don't know it tastes like seaweed salad isn't it just seaweed what is aame this is just seaweed salad this kind of has like a durian effect cuz it smells like ass but it's kind of good it's like a little spicy I can't say exactly in the mood for this right now but it's not terrible all right we got baby crab chips they even put a little baby C no clue if it means they're like potato chips flavor is crab oh oh these look crazy y'all these are crabs just fried with the [ __ ] shell on it smells like [ __ ] bugs I'm not kidding this is one of my biggest fears I cannot handle anything in food that's like inedible like shells or like a feather or an egg so forgive me that I'm crying right now cuz I'm so [ __ ] scared you know when you don't want to eat something you feel your body rejecting it I feel my stomach like closing the [ __ ] up also a big fan of the legs like just the [ __ ] crab legs that are just at in guess who threw up we're going to save the white fungus fish gelatin for last but we have one more other than this we have jinai fish sold 9 billion packs worldwide 9 billion of what what is this what is it though all right interesting these are individually wrapped again Watch Me be dead in like 24 hours cuz all of this was supposed to be like cooked somehow and I'm giving myself like [ __ ] pathogens I'm imagining that the apocalypse started today and all of this food in my house was and all of this food was all I had to survive on I would just kill myself day one come on little fishy no no no no [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] it dead I smells like dog food I recognize that I speak in hyperbole a lot of the time so when I say things like this is disgusting maybe it has no meaning anymore but that was [ __ ] disgusting last one last thing I am so scared of this I like the packaging oh it comes with a little with a little spoon too this is it oh it's gelatinous what do we think guys I'm sure that this [ __ ] has been [ __ ] eaten at jillion times across the world and my Western tongue is just too much of a baby get over with get over with man get over with this is like a good Scoop like what the [ __ ] is that I'm not going to throw it again it tasted like sweet Jello-O fish what why why this is crazy zero out of 10 so what's I got to do with a metric [ __ ] ton of food from temu uh I threw it in the [ __ ] Dr kidding I'm joking I'm joking I was really racking my brain cuz I felt bad and I was like I find this food disgusting but maybe there's someone out there that would like it and then I thought Chinese food Chinatown food Bank in Chinatown and I dropped it off and I hope that the people who need it in Chinatown enjoy it a lot more than I do anyways once again don't buy [ __ ] from temu ever delete the app and I love you color of land