Overview
This lecture covers effective speaking in spontaneous situations, focusing on managing anxiety, embracing opportunities, active listening, and using structured responses.
The Importance of Spontaneous Speaking
- Spontaneous speaking often occurs at work or social events, such as introductions, feedback, toasts, and Q&As.
- Most people fear public speaking; managing rather than eliminating this anxiety is key to effective communication.
- Your goal as a communicator is to help your audience feel comfortable, not necessarily to deliver a pleasant message.
Managing Speaking Anxiety
- Greet and acknowledge your anxiety to prevent it from escalating.
- Reframe public speaking as a conversation, not a performance, to reduce pressure.
- Use questions and conversational language to engage your audience.
- Stay present-focused by using physical or mental activities, like tongue twisters, to avoid worrying about future outcomes.
Four Steps for Effective Spontaneous Speaking
1. Get Out of Your Own Way
- Stop striving for perfection; allow yourself to be "dull" so authenticity can emerge.
- Practice activities that disrupt overthinking, such as naming objects incorrectly to bypass mental patterns.
- Reacting is less effective than responding genuinely in the moment.
2. See Situations as Opportunities
- Reframe speaking challenges as opportunities for connection and contribution.
- Practice improvisational games, like gift exchange, to train your mindset toward opportunity and collaboration.
- Use the "yes, and" approach to build on what’s given instead of being defensive.
3. Slow Down and Listen
- Listening fully ensures you understand the demand before you respond.
- Focus on the other person; use exercises, like spelling out words, to practice active listening.
- Maxim: "Don't just do something, stand there"—take time to listen.
4. Use Structures to Respond
- Structured responses improve audience understanding and speaker confidence.
- Two recommended frameworks:
- Problem-Solution-Benefit (or Opportunity-Solution-Benefit).
- What—So What—Now What (or Who—So What—Now What for introductions).
- Structure helps speakers formulate answers quickly and clearly.
Handling Special Situations
- In hostile environments, acknowledge emotions without labeling them; paraphrase to reframe questions.
- For remote or distributed audiences, use engagement techniques like polling, imagined scenarios, or collaborative tools.
- For cross-examinations or challenging Q&A, prepare key themes and examples, and use paraphrasing to gain time and clarity.
- Adjust your approach based on cultural expectations and norms.
- Use humor carefully—self-deprecating is safest—and always have a backup plan.
Key Terms & Definitions
- Spontaneous Speaking — Speaking without preparation, off-the-cuff in real-time situations.
- Anxiety Management — Techniques to acknowledge and control nervousness before and during speaking.
- Conversational Language — Using inclusive, direct language to create rapport with the audience.
- Processing Fluency — The ease with which information is processed, increased by structured communication.
- Paraphrasing — Restating a question or comment to clarify and buy time before responding.
- "Yes, and" — An improvisational principle of accepting and building on others’ contributions.
Action Items / Next Steps
- Practice "dare to be dull" and gift-giving improvisation games to loosen up spontaneity.
- Use tongue twisters and present-focused activities before speaking.
- Apply the two structures (Problem-Solution-Benefit and What—So What—Now What) in daily conversations for practice.
- Review the provided handout for summary and additional structures.
- Explore the book "Speaking Up Without Freaking Out" and the website "No Freaking Speaking" for more resources.