hey don't tell so okay so I was trying to lotion my back the other morning right and I could not reach the itchy spot so I was like "Okay I got to be creative." So I go in the kitchen and I grab a big Smart Water bottle and then I I slather cocoa butter on the outside and I throw it over my shoulder yeah and as I was rolling it across my back I thought to myself "Wow I need a man." Um right uh I got to get on that but in the meantime I I got online and I found on Amazon a lotion applicator i was like I know there's got to be a thing to help with this right lotion applicator it's just like a longhandled like uh spatula for lonely people and you put the lotion right in the middle and you slap it and I ordered it right away and then immediately tried to delete it from my order history cuz I knew I didn't want whatever sadass suggestions came along with that purchase right now the algorithm is like customers who bought this also bought like like rope yes i didn't want that from me saw an article come across my feed right and the headline was um like is it okay to marry for companionship and not love and I was like oo I'll bite so I clicked the link i'm a curious person i clicked the link but then the article was behind a payw wall yeah so I I still don't know i don't know if any of you guys just kind of need to know information i couldn't afford to find out you know and I'm starting to think like that's the path I'm on cuz like I be saying I want to be partner or like I would like to get married but if I'm real like I want to get married like I want to learn to play guitar like I'm not doing nothing about it but I don't I just be saying that cuz at this point in my life y'all I'm a lazy dater i put the time in when I was younger now I just want my soulmate to show up where I'm already at that's all the energy I have you know my friends are always telling me "Aaron you're not going to meet anybody at your house you know cuz that's where I be at." Um but I tell them "You don't know that right?" Like Task Grab Uber Eats UPS every day new people come by it's not the same guy every time on all the apps told someone my age the other day yeah and she hit me back with a black don't crack yeah that's supposed to be a compliment black don't crack but it felt like a gut punch it did it felt like a gut punch cuz like I had not realized that I was black don't crack years old like you don't know you don't know till someone tells you sneaks up on you it was my first BDC and I was having a hard time with it and I called one of my girlfriends and she was like "Aaron get out your feelings you know how it is when it comes to age everything's relative." She said "Well we were her age we would have thought people our age are old." And I had to think about it i was like "Yeah I guess you're right i just don't see myself that way." And here's the thing that I'm learning as the years pass right it's that old will get older the older you get okay you will move the goalposts your entire life i'm not old those people are old yeah and you'll never stop doing it i was talking to my dad the other day my dad is 78 years old and uh the other day he and I were talking about um Oh man we uh do you guys remember uh Joe Joe Biden he used to be president um you might be too young anyway so we were talking about Joe Biden my dad was like "Yeah I mean he don't look good but 80 ain't really old." And I was like "No it's undeniably old." Like you know but he's 78 so he can't admit to that you know he was like "Job ain't old." He was like "Man Moses was 80 when he led the Exodus." Yeah that's not a good argument dude that can't be your comeback yeah well I tell you who's not old is Moses yeah Joe Biden is old like that's undeniable right but I think it's only fair to discuss the fact that he tried to be a young president he did he ran a lot like I don't know if you The first time Joe Biden ran for president I was nine i was nine and now I am black on crack you understand what I'm saying like that is that is a very long time to be trying to get the same job i have never wanted a job that bad could you imagine like you just went to an interview and you're like "Oh that went pretty good." good and then you're like "All right when can I expect to hear something?" And they be like "Eh about 32 years." Right but check back every four we'll My mom I My mom just started taking a new drug uh that's called Prevagen right you're supposed to take it daily it's supposed to help with your memory right but when I was there over the holidays I learned that she's only taking it when she can't remember something like in the moment like for her it's like Alka-Seltzer for your brain like you just like she'll be mid story she'll be like "You know who I ran into the other day the girl's mother the girl your friend from high school that you was in the band with what oh damn what is George bring me your prevagen." I'm like "That is not that's not how you do it you got to take it all the time." I love this job like I love I love what I do for a living i've been doing this for a long time and it's a blessing to do what you love for a living but I I will say this there are definitely times when I am hanging out like with my civilian friends and uh you know they'll be talking about their jobs and uh I I I will get a little insecure because like I I love what I do but I I'm aware like this is not the most adult job right it doesn't always feel like the most impactful thing to do with your life for a living like I I used to date a guy who's a medical researcher yeah and also a huge [ __ ] but but his job a very important job his job was to help develop a malaria drug that people don't become resistant to that's affordable for poor countries right it was a big job and he would call me in the morning on his way to work he' be like "Hey babe headed to the lab you know the accumulator," like whatever he'd be saying um and then he'd go "What are you doing today don't be like that." Like you you know it's not going to match what you're doing right and I would get in my feelings but I read this series of essays and it was all about how ancient Greek philosophers really valued comedy and how they saw humor as philosophically important right and it gave me perspective i was like you know what maybe I've been too hard on me right cuz like if Aristotle thinks I'm a hero like I'm not going to I'm not going to argue but here's the thing so So in New York City most big comedy cities like standup is a cash business right you go to comedy club nobody's getting a payroll check for 15 minutes of jokes who will come in we'll sign a ledger they'll hand us cash right end of the year we settle up for taxes you know or we don't mind your business so that part's not even your business anyway so imagine I'm I'm uptown right i'm in the green room of a comedy club i'm waiting to be paid right manager comes in to pay me but then she pays me with titty money from her bra just blatantly in my face just reached in there and handed it to me and it did not uh make me feel philosophically important that was not the effect it made me furious right like and it just felt very aggressive like she maintained eye contact the whole time it was very much like "Yeah you going to take this pity money?" Like of course I'm going to take it like I did the job and I earned that money and also I need it i'm saving up to find out if it's okay to marry for companionship and not love and every bit helped but like why wouldn't you just like take the money out on the other side of the door like you knew you were coming in to pay me like take the money out on the other side of the door give it to me let me worry about why it's moist like let me write my own story i'm a writer i can fill in any blank if you leave room for deniability like just hand it oh that's a little damn uh you know what i bet it's raining in her office like you know how it be raining inside i don't know i just think that like how you are compensated for the work you do lets you know how valued you are by the people paying you that only makes sense to me right like uh I don't know y'all i don't know what you do for a living but I'm betting most of you don't get paid in titty money and if you do sorry for profiling most of you though you probably just you just wake up your money is in your account you don't touch a check nothing it just shows up there but I don't have that ain't no titty direct deposit you know or or maybe there is maybe that's what TD Bank is i don't know i'm with Wells Fargo but anyway you guys thank you so much have a great night [Music]