Self-Leadership for Men with Connor Beaton

Introduction

• Speaker: Connor Beaton
• Topic: Self-leadership and stopping 10 behaviors to become more attractive, confident, and self-led.
• Personal Context: Connor shares how lacking self-leadership led to his own life's derailment.

Concept of Self-Leadership

• Definition: Having internal direction, impulse control, discipline, and the skills to lead oneself towards desired outcomes.
• Importance: Leads to attractive, confident behaviors and deeper autonomy and inner authority.

Overview of 10 Things to Stop Doing

1. Stop Making Excuses for Not Being in Good Shape

• Importance: Physical fitness greatly impacts confidence, attractiveness, and overall well-being.
• Example: Despite having many responsibilities, Connor maintained a rigorous workout regime.
• Impact: Improved confidence, physical attractiveness, and self-discipline.

2. Stop Giving Women Free Attention on Social Media

• Problem: Wasting time on low-value interactions (e.g., Instagram, TikTok) that give nothing in return.
• Solution: Clear out such distractions to focus on meaningful connections or missions.

3. Stop Comparing Yourself to Other Men

• **Types of Comparison: **Financial, success-oriented, trauma-induced comparison.
• Impact: Reduces confidence and inflates insecurities.
• Solution: Focus on personal growth rather than external comparisons.

4. Stop Wasting Time on Social Media, TV, and Video Games

• Problem: Significant time wastage with little return value.
• Solution: Implement rules and structure to limit time on these distractions.

5. Stop Pursuing Short-term Gratification and Pleasure

• Aspect: Reigning in impulsive behaviors (e.g., smoking, junk food, pornography).
• Solution: Focus on long-term goals and discipline.

6. Stop Believing in a Lottery Mindset

• Definition: Fantasizing about dramatic life-changing events (e.g., winning a lottery).
• Problem: Prevents taking actionable steps towards real goals.
• Solution: Grounding in immediate actions and realistic goals.

7. Stop Believing You’re Broken

• Issue: Attracts similar negative energy, impacts mental health.
• Reality: No one is fundamentally broken; adverse experiences can be overcome with help.

8. Stop Thinking You Have to Do It Alone

• Solution: Seek out supportive company of inspiring men and form a support network.
• Result: Improved advancement through shared experiences and mutual support.

9. Stop Pretending You Don’t Have Trauma

• Truth: Unresolved trauma can sabotage personal and professional life.
• Solution: Address and work through past pain for genuine healing and growth.

10. Stop Believing Peace or Happiness is on the Other Side of Achievement

• Trap: Placing happiness in the future rather than the present.
• Solution: Practice Present Moment Appreciation (PMA).

Final Thoughts

• Action Steps: Choose one behavior to stop for the next 30 days to see incremental changes.
• Engagement: Leave comments on YouTube about changes being committed to and share the content with others.