chapter 23 of Jane air this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit librivox.org recording by Elizabeth clut Jane a by Charlotte Bronte chapter 23 a splendid Midsummer shown over England Skies so pure Suns so radiant as were then seen in Long succession seldom favor even singly our wave GT land it was as if a band of Italian days had come from the south like a flock of Glorious passenger birds and lighter to rest them on the Cliffs of albian the hay was all got in the fields round thornfield were green and Shor the roads white and baked the trees were in their dark Prime hedge and wood full leaved and deeply tinted contrasted well with the sunny Hue of the cleared Meadows between on Midsummer Eve Adele weary with Gathering wild strawberries in Hay Lane half the day had gone to bed with the sun I watched her drop asleep and when I left her I sought the garden it was now the sweetest hour of the 24 day its fervid fires had wasted and Dew fell cool on panting plain and scorched Summit where the sun had gone down in simple State pure of the pump of clouds spread a solemn purple burning with the light of Red Jewel and furnace flame at one point on one Hill Peak and extending high and wide soft and still softer over half Heaven the East had its own charm or fine deep blue and its own modest gem a casino and solitary star soon it would boast the moon but she was yet Beneath The Horizon I walked a while on the pavement but a subtle well-known scent that of a cigar stole from some window I saw the library casement open a hands breath I knew I might be watched then so I went apart into the orchard no Nook in the grounds more sheltered and more eden-like it was full of trees it bloomed with flowers a very high wall shut it out from the court on one side on the other a Beach Avenue screened it from the lawn at the bottom was a sunk fence its sole separation from Lonely Fields a winding walk bordered with Laurels and terminating in a giant horse chestnut circled at the base by a seat LED down to the fence here one could wander unseen while such honeydew fell such silence rained such gloaming gathered I felt as if I could haunt such shade forever but in threading the flower and fruit parar at the upper part of the enclosure enticed there by the Light the now Rising Moon cast on this more open quarter my step is stayed not by sound not by sight but once more by a warning fragrance sweet Brier and southernwood Jasmine pink and Rose have long been yielding their evening sacrifice of incense this new scent is neither of shrub nor flower it is I know it well it is Mr Rochester's cigar I look round and I listen I see trees Laden with ripening fruit I hear a night Andale wobbling in a wood half a mile off no moving form is visible no coming step audible but that perfume increases I must flee I make for the Wicket leading to the Shrubbery and I see Mr Rochester entering I step aside into the ivy recess he will not stay long he will soon return when he came and if I sit still he will never see me but no even tide is as pleasant to him as to me and this antique Garden as attractive and he strolls on now lifting the Goosey tree branches to look at the fruit large as plums with which they are Laden now taking a ripe Cherry from the wall now stooping toward a knot of flowers either to inhale their fragrance or to admire the Dew beads on their petals a great moth goes humming by me it lights on a plant at Mr Rochester's foot he sees it and bends to examine it now he has his back towards me thought I and he is occupied too and perhaps if I walk softly I can slip away unnoticed I troed on an edging of turf that the crackle of the pebbly gravel might not betray me he was standing among the beds at a yard or too distant from where I had to pass the moth apparently engaged him I shall get by very well I I meditated as I crossed his shadow thrown long Over the Garden by The Moon not yet risen high he said quietly without turning Jane come and look at this fellow I had made no noise he had not eyes behind could his shadow feel I started at first and then I approached him look at his wings said he he reminds me rather of a West Indian insect one does not often see so large and gay a night Rover in England there he is flown The Moth roamed away I was sheepishly retreating also but Mr Rochester followed me and when we reached the Wicket he said turn back on so lovely a night it is a shame to sit in the house and surely no one can wish to go to bed while Sunset is thus at meeting with moonrise it is one of my faults that though my tongue is sometimes prompt enough at an answer there are times when it sadly fails me in framing an excuse and always the lapse occurs at some crisis when a faasle word or plausible pretext is especially wanted to get me out of painful embarrassment I did not like to walk at this hour alone with Mr Rochester in the shadowy orchard but I could not find a reason to allege for leaving him I followed with lagging step and thoughts busily bent on discovering a means of extrication but he himself looked so composed and so grave also I became ashamed of feeling any confusion the evil if evil existent or perspective there was seemed seemed to lie with me only his mind was unconscious and quiet Jane he recomened as we entered the Laural walk and slowly strayed down in the direction of the sunk fence and the horse chestnut thornfield is a pleasant place in summer is it not yes sir you must have become in some degree attached to the house you who have an eye for natural beauties and a good deal of the organ of adhesiveness I am attached to it indeed and though I don't comprehend how it is I perceive you have acquired a degree of regard for that foolish little child Adele too and even for simple Dame Fairfax yes sir in different ways I have an affection for both and would be sorry to part with them yes pity he said and sighed and paused it is always the way of events in this life he continued presently no sooner have you got settled in a pleasing resting place than a voice calls out to you rise and move on for the hour of repose is expired must I move on sir I asked must I leave thornfield I believe you must Jane I am sorry Janet but I believe indeed you must this was a blow but I did not let it prostrate me well sir I shall be ready when the order to March comes it is come now I must give it tonight and you are going to be married sir exactly precisely with your usual acuteness you have hit the nail straight on the head soon sir very soon my that is Miss A and you'll remember Jane that the first time I or rumor plainly intimated to you that it was my intention to put my old bachelor's neck into the sacred noose to enter into the Hol estate of matrimony to take Miss Ingram to my bosom in short she's an extensive armful but that's not to the point one can't have too much of such a very excellent thing as my beautiful blanch well as I was saying listen to me Jane you're not turning your head to look after more moths are you that was only a lady clock child flying away home I wish to remind you that it was you who first said to me with that discretion I respect in you with that foresight prudence and humility which beit your responsible and dependent position that in case I married Miss Ingram both you and little Adele had better Trot forth with I pass over the sort of slur conveyed in the suggestion on the character of my beloved indeed when you are far away Janet I'll try to forget it I shall notice only its wisdom which is such that I have made it my LW of action Adele must go to school and you miss a must get a new situation yes sir I will advertise immediately and meantime I suppose I was going to say I suppose I may stay here till I find another shelter to betake myself to but I stopped feeling it would not do to risk a long sentence for my voice was not quite under command in about a month I hope to be a bridegroom continued Mr Rochester and in the interim I shall myself look out for employment and an asylum for you thank you sir I am sorry to give oh no need to apologize I consider that when the dependent does her Duty as well as you have done yours she has a sort of claim upon her employer for any little assistance he can conveniently render her indeed I have already through my future mother-in-law heard of a place that I think will suit it is to take the education of the Five Daughters of Mrs dianis o' G of bitternut Lodge conut Ireland you like Ireland I think there's such warm-hearted people there they say it is a long way off sir no matter a girl of your sense will not object to the voyage or the distance not the voyage but the distance and then the sea is a barrier from what Jane from England and from thornfield and well from you sir I said this almost involuntarily and with as little sanction of free will my tears gushed out I did not cry so as to be heard however I avoided sobbing the thought of Mrs o GA and bitternut Lodge struck cold to my heart and colder the thought of all the Brine and foam destined as it seemed to rush between me and the master at whose side I now walked and coldest the remembrance of The Wider ocean wealth cast custom intervened between me and what I naturally and inevitably loved it is a long way I again said it is to be sure and when you get to bonut Lodge conut Ireland I shall never see you again Jane that's morally certain I never go over to Ireland not having myself much of a fancy for the country we have been good friends Jane have we not yes sir and when friends are on the eve of Separation they like to spend the little time that remains to them close to each other come we'll talk over the voyage and The Parting quietly half an hour or so while the Stars enter into their shining life up in heaven Yonder here is the chestnut tree here is the bench at its old Roots come we will sit there in peace tonight though we should never more be destined to sit there together he seated me and himself it is a long way to Ireland Janet and I am sorry to send my little friend on such weary travels but if I can't do better how is to be helped are you anything akin to me do you think Jane I could risk no sort of answer by this time my heart was still because he said I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you especially when you are near me as now it is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame and if that boisterous Channel and 200 miles or so of land come broad between us I am afraid that cord of communion will be snapped and then I have a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly as for you you'd forget me that I never should sir you know impossible to proceed Jane do you hear that night Andale singing in the wood listen in listening I sobbed convulsively for I could repress what I endured no longer I was obliged to yield and I was shaken from head to foot with acute distress when I did speak it was only to express an impetuous wish that I had never been born or never come to thornfield because you are sorry to leave it the vehement of emotion stirred by grief and love within me was claiming Mastery and struggling for full Sway and asserting a right to predominate to overcome to live rise and rain at last yes and to speak I grieve to leave thornfield I love thornfield I love it because I have lived in it a full and delightful life momentarily at least I have not been trampled on I have not been petrified I have not been buried with inferior minds and excluded from every glimpse of communion with what is bright and energetic and high I have talked face to face with what I reverence with what I Delight in with an original a vigorous and expanded mind I have known you Mr Rochester and it strikes me with Terror and anguish to feel I absolutely must be torn from you forever I see the necessity of departure and it is like looking on the necessity of death where do you see the necessity he asked suddenly where you sir have placed it before me in what shape in the shape of Miss Ingram a noble and beautiful woman your bride my bride what bride I have no bride but you will have yes I will I will he set his teeth then I must go you have said it yourself no you must stay I swear it and the oath shall be kept I tell you I must go I retorted roused to something like passion do you think I can stay to become nothing to you do you think I am an automatan a machine without feelings and can bear to have my morsel of bread snatched from my lips and my drop of Living Water dashed from my cup do you think because I am poor obscure plain and little I am soulless and heartless you think wrong I have as much Soul as you and full as much heart and if God had gifted me with some beauty and much wealth I should have made it as hard for you to leave me as it is now for me to leave you I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom conventionalities or even of mortal flesh it is my spirit that addresses your spirit just as if both had passed through the grave and we stood at God's feet equal as we are as we are repeated Mr Rochester so he added enclosing me in his arms Gathering me to his breast pressing his lips on my lips so Jane yes so sir I rejoined and yet not so for you are a married man or as good as a married man and wed to one inferior to you to one with whom you have no sympathy whom I do not believe you truly love for I have seen and heard you sneer at her I would scorn such a union therefore I am better than you let me go where Jane to Ireland yes to Ireland I have spoken my mind and can go anywhere now Jane be still don't struggle so like a wild frantic bird that is rening its own plumage in its desperation I am no bird and no net and snares me I am a free human being with an independent will which I now exert to leave you another effort set me at Liberty and I stood erect before him and your will shall decide your destiny he said I offer you my hand my heart and a share of all my possessions you play a farce which I merely laugh at I ask you to pass through life at my side to be my second self and best Earthly companion for that fate you have already made your choice and must abide by it Jane be still a few moments you are over excited I will be still too a waft of wind came sweeping down the Laurel walk and trembled through the bows of the chestnut it wandered away away to an infinite distance it died the night and Gale's Song was then the only voice of the hour in listening to it I again wept Mr Rochester sat quiet looking at me gently and seriously some time passed before he spoke he at last said come to my side Jane and let us explain and understand one another I will never again come to your side I am torn away now and cannot return but Jane I summon you as my wife it is you only I intend to marry I was silent I thought he mocked me come Jane come hither your bride stands between us he rose and with a stride reached me My bride is here he said again drawing me to him because my equal is here and my likeness Jane will you marry me still I did not answer and and still I wried myself from his grasp for I was still incredulous do you doubt me Jane entirely you have no faith in me not a wit am I a liar in your eyes he asked passionately little skeptic you shall be convinced what love have I for Miss Ingram none and that you know what love has she for me none as I have taken pains to prove I caused a rumor to reach her that my fortune was the third of what was supposed and after that I presented myself to see the result it was coldness both from her and her mother I would not I could not marry Miss Ingram you you strange you almost unearthly thing I love as my own flesh you poor and obscure and small and plain as you are I entreat to accept me as a husband what me I ejaculated beginning in his earnestness and especially in his in civility to credit his sincerity me who have not a friend in the world but you if you are my friend not a shilling but what you have given me you Jane I must have you for my own entirely my own will you be mine say yes quickly Mr Rochester let me look at your face turned to the Moonlight why because I want to read your countenance turn there you will find it scarce ly more legible than a crumpled scratched page read on only make haste for I suffer his face was very much agitated and very much flushed and there were strong workings in the features and strange gleams in the eyes oh Jane you torture me he exclaimed with that searching and yet faithful and generous look you torture me how can I do that if you are true and you're awful real my only feelings to you must be gratitude and devotion they cannot torture gratitude he ejaculated and added wildly Jane accept me quickly say Edward give me my name Edward I will marry you are you in Earnest do you truly love me do you sincerely wish me to be your wife I do and if an oath is necessary to satisfy you I swear it then sir I will marry you Edward my little wife Dear Edward would come to me come to me entirely now said he and added in his deepest tone speaking in my ear as his cheek was laid on mine make my happiness I will make yours God pardon me he said joined airong and man meddle not with me I have her and will hold her there is no one to meddle sir I have no Kindred to interfere no that is the best of it he said and if I had loved him less I should have thought his accent and look of exaltation Savage but sitting by him roused from The Nightmare of parting called to the paradise of Union I thought only of the Bliss given me to drink in so abundant a flow again and again he said are you happy Jane and again and again I answered yes after which he murmured it will atone it will atone have I not found her friendless cold and comfortless will I not go guard and cherish and Solace her is there not love in my heart and constancy in my resolves it will expiate at God's tribunal I know my maker sanctions what I do for the world's judgment I wash my hands thereof for man's opinion I defy it but what had befallen the night the moon was not yet set and we were all in Shadow I could scarcely see my Master's face near as I was and what ailed the chestnut tree it wed and groaned while wind roared in the Laurel walk and came sweeping over us we must go in said Mr Rochester the weather changes I could have sat with thee till morning Jane and so thought I could I with you I should have said so perhaps but a livid Vivid spark leapt out of a cloud at which I was looking and there was a crack a crash and a close rattling peel and I thought only of hiding my dazzled eyes against Mr Rochester's shoulder the rain rushed down he hurried me up the walk through the grounds and into the house but we were quite wet before we could pass the threshold he was taking off my Shaw in the hall and shaking the water out of my loosened hair when Mrs Fairfax emerged from her room I did not observe her at first nor did Mr Rochester the lamp was lit the clock was on the stroke of 12 hasten to take off your wet things said he and before you go good night good night my darling he kissed me repeatedly when I looked up un leaving his arms there stood the Widow pale grave and amazed I only smiled at her and ran upstairs explanation will do for another time thought I still when I reached my chamber I felt a Pang at the idea she should even temporarily misconstrue what she had seen But Joy Soon effaced every other feeling and loud as the wind blew near and deep as the Thunder crashed Fierce and frequent as the lightning gleamed cataract like as the rain fell during a storm of 2 hours duration I experienced no fear and little awe Mr Rochester came Thrice to my door in the course of it to ask if I was safe and tranquil and that was comfort that was strength for anything before I left my bed in the morning little Adele came running in to tell me that the great horse chestnut at the bottom of the orchard had been struck by lightning in the night and half of it split away end of chapter 23 for