Animal Tier List - Likelihood of Winning in a Fight

now we're moving on to the second segment of the stream here quite possibly the most controversial segment we are doing an animal tier list now you might be asking yourself what the is an animal tier list we're going to be raiding these animals on How likely I am to beat them in a fight floating cantaloupe made this tier list W floating calou thank you for making the tier list for me we're going to do the tiers based on the odds that I beat them in a death match okay this is hand to hand combat or hand to PA combat hand to th combat whatever animal we're fighting I also see Mark Zuckerberg's on the west you know that'll be a nice one and the only rules for this are number one I would have no weapons right this is a hypothetical thing I'm going to be giving obviously my take you guys are going to be sharing your take on whether or not I would win or you would win in general like I'm not going to have a knife in this hypothetical or a gun or anything I'm I'm I'm in a ring in their habitat that is the other rule I'm fighting them where they live obviously I'm a human I'm like more intelligent than the majority of these animals so it would be unfair if I fought a shark on the land right because they're going to suffocate they're going to die that's what it is obviously first tier we have 0% I'm dead this is reserved for animals that I think I have no chance of beating in any scenario whatsoever 20% chance of winning right I could get lucky these are reserved for animals where I'm likely to lose but there's a chance that I could beat them 50% even match if we fought 100 times I would die 50 they would die die 50 75 means I'm basically guaranteed going to win this fight unless something really [ __ ] up here I I I'm I'm probably going to win and then 100% is I'm I'm murdering this thing I'm going to [ __ ] kick its ass into the ground I'm going to shove its face into the [ __ ] dirt and curb stomp it it's going to die so fast it's not even going to put up a fight okay first one I don't know okay we'll start with it it's an ostrich it's head is cut off but you can see that it's an ostrich now ostriches are fairly tall and weigh twice as much as me I believe the average weight let me look up some stats here for the ostrich the average ostrich is anywhere between 7 and 9 ft tall and they weigh between 250 and 300 lb now to put that in perspective for you guys rating we'll do a little we'll do a little rotation on the Joe Bart's fit here uh as well as my uh you know just athletic capabilities I'm 61 and I weigh 178 pounds can't see the quads I have good quads I have good quads I need that to be noted for this match I will be able to use my legs here I have small Cavs we're not going to show them now I'm probably going to be describing some fighting strategies that I'm going to have against some of these animals the ostrich is you know going to be a hard match I I'm going to say that I don't know how this is my general strategy against the ostrich the ostrich is obviously much taller than me they don't have hands they have WI things and feet now they can Peck me to death and stop me to death but they're also a bit skittish I think my strategy here is uh I'm not going to be able to Brute Force beat this thing to death it outweighs me but as you can see it has a skinny [ __ ] neck ostrich's necks are not that big I think that I'm going to [ __ ] jump up on its back and then just [ __ ] you know burn the [ __ ] out of out of its [ __ ] out of its neck I'm going to be rubbing its neck I'm gonna be choking it seeing if I could kill it my choke its neck how thick is an ostrich's neck let's look that up they look fairly skinny chat here I'm I'm just I'm just thinking if I pull up an image right now I think I kill that thing and if I get on if I get on and I grip right I do some forearm exercises for a for a few months before okay that's uh that's that's cheating we're in my condition right now I'm fighting them I think I could get near the top of its head and just [ __ ] ring it it neck it'll Peck me not if I'm on its back I think i' I think it's unlikely that I would win against an ostrich but I think I would win 20% of the time I think I could get lucky here I think about I'm fighting an ostrich say a 100 times I fight it to the death I think 20 of those I'm winning honestly I'd say maybe even 50 I'd say zero it's not a zero chat it's not a zero if you're telling me if I fought this thing a hundred times I'm dying a 100 times no no there's there's there's at least a couple where I [ __ ] shove his face into the dirt and I [ __ ] kill that [ __ ] a bear now I used to have the bad take okay now this is a really bad take so I I I know I know it's I know it's bad but we got to share it I used to think that I could kill a bear with a Bowie knife I you I that was like an honest I I genuinely used to believe that if I was going against like a a small you know midsized brown bear that I could murder it if you gave me a knife I don't even have a knife in this scenario even if I did think I'd die I think if I had a small pistol I'd still die I watched a video of bear's claws editor throw up an image of bears claws here they are like 5 in thick and they can [ __ ] they would it would just slash me it would be if I if you put me in the woods with a bear even in a ring it would be 10 seconds it would go and just slash me one time doesn't even need to bite me and I would immediately die it would decapitate me it might bite my head off it might jump on me and just the sheer weight of this thing is going to [ __ ] kill me uh so yeah now 0% I'm dying now kangaroo now here's where I'm a bit more confident in my capabilities here I I know that kangaroo I recently found this out kangaroo do drown dogs for fun I didn't know that I had a chatter share that info with me for a while they're kind of psychopaths I've never met a kangaroo I don't live in a Australia they apparently like kill animals like domestic animals for fun and they can like kick you to death and they're kind of natural-born boxers to that I need to show you the build of a kangaroo they got really short arms they're going for the ranged kicks their legs are that's a small one these car these ones are kind of small but it's the same thing when they're bigger when they fight should we watch a video of them fighting oh I forgot they could use their Tail as leeway they don't have a soft tail they have they have a strong tail here see but it kind of looks like they're doing like a shitty High School fight where they're like you know they look it's just I I how tall are they I need to look up some stats I need to look up some stats here bro their arms are so [ __ ] short though I I would I okay my original strategy if I'm honestly being real was to again get behind it but I think it's Tail's Gonna Save it from falling over I was thinking if I get this thing to the [ __ ] ground I put it in a [ __ ] headlock I get I I wedge it's like jiujitsu dude I don't even know Jiu-Jitsu but I've seen [ __ ] I'm gonna get that [ __ ] in a spil or whatever I'm going to wrap my arm around that [ __ ] that fucker's neck and I'm GNA hold his [ __ ] arms back and it's just going to be like it's going to be done I think I kill it I think I kill it to the death to the death chat it might be able to knock me out how is it killing me is it going to stomp on me it might knock me out a few times but I'm gonna be like Rocky dude I'm gonna get back up I'm gonna get back up and I'm GNA go and then I'm going to hear and then I'm going to start fighting that [ __ ] again right it'll drown me I don't know oh my God imagine if a [ __ ] K imagine that we actually pan this out and there's just like a 240p video of a kangaroo just [ __ ] holding me underwater I'm like so confident here and it's just like it's just like a shitty video it's just like so far away somebody filming like a [ __ ] noia and just be drowning from a kangaroo dude I'm going 50 I'm going 50 I think to the death there's an even shot I have I think I could bludge in this thing with my [ __ ] fists is that a crocodile or an alligator either way I'm dead I'm fighting them in their territory we don't even need to talk about that [ __ ] you ever see when they death roll someone I'm not even going to be able to kill this thing like there's no strategy to kill this thing with my bare hands it has armor if there's a 0.001% chance I kill a bear if it trips on its own foot and [ __ ] passes out and then I just beat it to death this thing is killing me every single time I fight it I'm never beating a crocodile even if I got on its back it's just going to it I'm just going to sit there and and then eventually it's just going to kill me just want to point out I've seen a SI 62 200lb man get put into a coma by a kangaroo 20% he's not me right 20% I'll lower it a little bit Rhino I don't I don't even know a rhino it's not even a de it's just would I survive like could I make it out in time this isn't like a kangaroo I'm scrapping this [ __ ] to the death the Rhino once that Bell dings and he starts charging me I just have to run he's hit me with his horn and then I'm dead and he's going to [ __ ] eat me it's over for that I feel like a rhino could outrun me a rhino could surely outrun me rhinos can run 34 miles an hour that is faster than the fastest human ever that has ever lived husan ball what if you have a knife dude it's a [ __ ] Rhino I used to convince myself that I could kill like a silver back gorilla with a knife as well because I was like oh similar weight change right I have a weapon but it's just a massive size diff it's just a massive size and at this point it's just like what am I going to I'm going to stab him then what you give me a knife I stab him and he's just going to tank that [ __ ] I think for me to kill a rhino I would have to have a genuine assault rifle like I would have to lay into that thing it's over a a giraffe it's still over giraffe a lot of people are probably thinking oh you know that you might not be able to die because what is it going to do maybe but they swing their heads if you've never seen giraffe fight they throw their necks around and whack each other in the head until one of them either dies or gives up oh that was a weak hit what are they tired is this in slow motion I've seen ones where they're putting [ __ ] effort into this what the hell's happening what type of [ __ ] giraffe fight is this that one's got a pair on him you see that Jesus come on put a little more effort into it okay now you're making me think I could kill you yeah there we go now they're head each other this shit's in slow mode but you could tell you could tell he got that wind up he got that wind up Bonk right into the ass dude he would hit me in the head and I'd Die it'd be like getting kicked by a horse I think I lose even if the reason I throw giraff here immediately is just because even if it doesn't kill me like say it can't reach me with its neck how am I going to kill a giraffe with my bare hands that's just not going to happen a camel same [ __ ] thing dude size death same [ __ ] thing a camel like what am I going to do I'm hly hear me out get up on its back right cuz I'm assuming we're going to start fairly close to each other I get on its back and I just sit on its neck and then he just gets tired and dies I I I just I literally just sit on his neck until he [ __ ] collapses from exhaustion they're also quite passive yeah I'm assuming they wouldn't really put up that much of a fight like I don't think a camel would try and kill me are we presuming that in this scenario the animal wants me dead I'm not agitating it we're both starting in we're fighting to the death it wants to kill me okay that might move the ostrich I really think I have a better chance to get a against a kangaroo than an ostrich I'm going to keep the camel at 20 Mark Zuckerberg doesn't he know jiujitsu this is the skin walker category I think Mark Zuckerberg's probably going to kill me because Mark Zuckerberg knows martial arts yeah I think I'm dead against Mark doesn't he have like a black belt okay silver back gorilla another 100% dead I believe silver back gorillas are maybe shorter than me but they weigh a lot they weigh 430 lb while it may only be 5T they're [ __ ] huge like that bro oh like what would I even do it would be like a fist fight you know you know what you know how this would pan out he grabs me by my sides and just [ __ ] smashes me into the ground just non-stop just punch me and it's going to be like ooh and then I'm dead in like six punches my head's going to be flattened like a pancake I'm dead I need some winds here I'm starting to get I'm starting to get discouraged I don't have anything that I could easily be an orangutang an orangutan big arms kind of lanky though eat a lot of fruit 100 pounds I think I could [ __ ] murder that thing 100 lb oo long arms though are they strong anybody know orangutan pretty built I know they eat a lot of fruit I think I think he's kind of like what's that one Star Wars character that holds four lightsabers and he's like a robot it's going to be like fighting that guy like General something General Grievous yeah it's going to be like fighting General Grievous here I think an orangutan's probably going to [ __ ] most people up in a fight just because he has reach and I think he's gonna I don't think it's going to be a boxing match right like kangaroo we're just going to be [ __ ] swinging he's not going to grab me I'm probably not going to grab him we're just going to be [ __ ] fist fighting autan Strat I already know he's going to hug me and then he's probably just going to try and [ __ ] maybe get me in a headlock of sorts I don't know if he's that smart but I'm pretty sure orangutans are one of the smartest Apes I'm going to go 20% chance just by the weight diff I think I I'm I think I'm I think I'm going to kill it weightwise but I think it has the smarts it has the reach pretty slow animal though I'm going to go 20% I think I win 20% for sure is that a deer or a buck that's a buck [ __ ] [ __ ] I don't know I I I've always thought that bucks are pretty weak like 150 lb Buck I I know that they have the horns and if you get past the antlers I think that I could just ludge in this animal right I don't want to be gruesome here but I think I could probably just jump on its back snap all of its [ __ ] weak ass legs and then just beat it to to death okay I think if I'm in the mindset of I need to kill this thing I'm taking out its [ __ ] legs I'm breaking its front two legs and it's going to be [ __ ] face hugging the ground and then I'm just going to [ __ ] kill it I think I'm going to lose a fraction of this time I think the fractions of the time I think the times that I lose is when it hits me with the antlers I think if it hits me with the antlers it's going to impale my body and then I'm going to die but I think that 75% % of the time here against a midsized buck I think I'm almost surely going to win and now chat this isn't me saying that I'm not going to get injured a many of these fights the 20% that I do win I think I'm going to be borderline in a coma I think I'm going to be walking out of that fight with one arm and and my eyeball missing but I think I'm living I'm killing it before I die a moose zero I think people don't realize how Big Moose are or me whatever the [ __ ] it is if you look up like moose can size comparison they are [ __ ] huge they're bigger than most cars in almost every horse you've ever seen uh and they also get agitated pretty quick like this is just a regular moose walking in like a parking lot it's like if it stood up tall it would be like all the way near the top of the tree it cowers over these [ __ ] cars and hitting a moose in a car a little fun fact here is also a death sentence cuz if you hit a deer you usually run that [ __ ] over or it hits your bumper if you hit a moose in a car you take out its legs and then its whole body falls into the windshield and you die so moose kill a lot of people in Maine and other places where moose exists anyways uh if I'm fighting this thing there's absolutely no strategy here if I'm bare fist there's no damage that I that is being done uh I think I'm going to immediately die question can we add something here to where if I'm in their habitat am I able like say right when the bell rings am I allowed to grab Like a Rock like say I'm fighting like a moose and I find a stone am I able as a human to say I'm going to use my surroundings to fight this thing I I don't think it's changing any of the answers as of right now anyways a sloth I [ __ ] I chat I kill a sloth with e it would be five [ __ ] seconds and that thing would be dead not only cuz it's slow it's also weak it's just it's going to slow-mo claw you it's it have I seen their claws I don't give a [ __ ] that [ __ ] ding ding ding and then I grab its arm and I go and it's done what the [ __ ] is this crab a spider crab oh they're they're very very large CBS I I just think they're so like not I I like I think if I kicked its legs they would fall off where am I fighting this thing where are spider crab where do spider crabs live they live on the sea floor and I'm fighting it in its habitat am I I'm assuming I'm allowed like scuba gear so I don't suffocate like this is unfair if I'm fighting something at the bottom of the sea floor no no mask nothing cuz I'm just going to drown so I have oxygen I have oxygen but I I'm not using any of the oxygen or like a tank to help fight I'm just on the bottom of the ocean floor fighting this [ __ ] thing I still think I murder it I know it's big and I know it has claws but you got to keep in mind that it's like if it plunges at me I'm going to grab two of its o but it's going to it has multiple claws I'm only going to be able to take two claws on at once I don't think I'm going to win every fight because I think there are scenarios where like I grab its two big claws and then it kind of impales me with its other ones that are like sharp I think I'm going to be a bit more nervous in the water I'm going to move slower I think that I have a 75% chance an eagle is dead an eagle Eagle's got a eagles's got a chance an eagle's got no it doesn't it doesn't I'm G to kill it it's a bird it has weak wings while it might Peck me and Claw me or rip my eyes out I grab its wing one time and it [ __ ] rips it off I'm going to murder that thing Bo Birds bones are brittle they're weak I don't give a [ __ ] chat I know an eagle is it's not it's dead it's dead a bald eagle weighs 14 pounds chat chat chats get that through your [ __ ] head okay you're saying do 20% [ __ ] it weighs 14 [ __ ] pounds that is a toddler I don't care what its wingspan is grabbit Wings rip it's gone it's gone I punch it one time it can fly I don't give a [ __ ] it's G to have to come down and fight me and hey I'm in its habitat guess what I'm going to be doing Rock snipe snipe snipe once I see it dive bombing me I Chuck a rock up and it [ __ ] hits it in the face it passes out I sniped that [ __ ] out of the air 0% chance that eagle has on me none it has sharp claws it weighs 14b is that a jaguar or a puma or a cheetah I don't know I think that's a jaguar or a leopard oh my God I don't know they're they're too similar for me either way it doesn't matter I don't I don't even need I don't even need to know what animal that is I know it's some weird version of a big cat I'm dead that thing literally could hunt people same thing here no there's actually not even a need for me to talk about them it's it's that quick that I'm dying a tiger is going to immediately claw me to death bite me it's going to bite my juggler it's going to start eating me while I'm still living lion same thing it's done okay now we are into a serious conversation a wolf one wolf not two not a pack okay I have a friend that genuinely believes that he could kill two wolves with his bare hands he's a psychopath they're going to kill you okay but one wolf it's it now here's the thing wolves are pack animals or I don't know if that's that's not a coyote I think that's wolf wolves are pack animals they fight together right they're scared of not fighting together we're eliminating that if this is a real life scenario and there's one wolf in me it's going to run away it's not going to fight me right it might try and bite me the second I punch it it's going to run this wolf wants to kill me it's willing to fight me to the death how big is this wolf that's what matters the biggest male wolf weighs 100 lb so a very large dog that's kind of scary looking at it compared to this woman that's sitting down because you if I show this oh my God you guys are going to immediately say I'm not going to kill it they're they're very large they're they're they don't weigh a lot this is some guy holding a dead wolf it's a very big dog but look at it this guy killed it right Paul Blart Bert killed it right he had a gun I'm just saying 100 pound wolf and that's like I'm used to okay here it is here's a better size comparison what is that that looks like a prehistoric wolf that's a real wolf 35 to 75 kilograms this guy's probably what is he 170 cm or 180 cm 180 cm I really don't know I think this is a 50/50 and I know a lot of you guys are saying I'm dying here but it's basically me fighting a very big dog and I know it has its mouth but realistically I think a strat ooh I don't know I don't know like am I so angry that I don't feel pain cuz realistically I could sacrifice my left arm I could go out for the bait it grabs my left arm and I just start [ __ ] wailing if it because I'm thinking it grabs my arm it's going to go it's going to do that thing that dogs do where they go and they shake and it like rips your skin that's going to hurt like a [ __ ] like I that like even if I'm hyped up on adrenaline that's going to really hurt me like it's whether or not I think I could kill it it's whether or not I die before it kills me these the big cats I'm not able to kill right I think if you gave me 10 seconds of an advantage on this wolf I lock my legs around its body and my arms around its head and I think I choke it to death or I punch it to death it's just whether or not I get into that scenario I think I got a I think I got a 50 or a 20% shot I I think high 20s I think 100 fights I kill it 20 times a great white shark is going to immediately be a 0% chance I don't even know what I would do I think that's the lowest odds out of anything we've seen thus far just because I'm in the water a sea lion I don't think that's a sea lion or a seal CH I don't think that's a seal is that a seal oh that's a sea lion sea lion versus seal a sea lion do I have to fight it in the water I feel like a sea Lion's kind of it's a mammal but its habitat is the water I know few people that go scuba diving and if you you're around like a baby sea lion they'll attack you like the parents will attack you could I kill a sea lion if I'm on land no doubt it's just slow got no Mobility looking like a goddamn hot dog I'm going to kill that thing in the water I'm dead am I fighting it on land or in the water it's it's made for the water so I think I would have to fight in in the water they're huge how big are sea lions 850 pounds it's GG's it's GG's no chance 850 lbs [ __ ] I thought they'd be like 150 is that a uh kodo not a komodo is that a kodo dragon what is it called I've seen videos of a kodo dragon eat I don't even know if I would show this on YouTube I've seen videos of a kodo dragon eat a mediumsized goat hole in one bite didn't even chew it they have they carry diseases they're fast and aggressive I think it would swallow me uh I think it would claw me and it really hurt and then it would swallow me I don't know what this guy's doing standing next to this [ __ ] thing I think I would lose I'm saying like oh there's a chance I could live long enough to do something but if I lived long enough to do something I'm really not going to hurt it like a lot of these big reptiles like crocodiles they're just so hard that me bludgeoning it with whatever object I could find like I would have to stab it I would have to stab it and I don't know if in its habitat I'm going to find something sharp enough within 15 seconds in my general surroundings to murder it no chance koalas do have chlamydia but that's not going to kill me and that would be post fight a koala I think I'm going to kill the majority of the time at least let me look up size of a koala they weigh anywhere between 29 to 33 lbs yeah they're little dudes here's one here's one with former president Barack Obama holding a chyia koala maybe this one doesn't have chyia we don't know not all of them do many koalas have chyia I think I kill it 100% of the time I wouldn't want to I would feel pretty bad about it but I'm going to kill it I think that's a Mana Ray uh that's killing me it would sting me literally no discussion on that a zebra now this is an entertaining matchup me Joe Bart versus is a zebra in a Saharan Death Match very low stats on the zebra in terms of danger I think his real method of fighting me is biting and kicking me I think it does has a it does have a size diff little stats on a zebra here between 770 and 950 lbs wow how big are they compared to a human all right they're about the same size you can ride a zebra that's bad news it's like between a a a pony and a horse it's it's the the in between between those two they're going to kick me yeah I was fairly confident until I real I thought they were smaller I thought a zebra would be like maybe 400 lb and I think it would topple easy I think this could just [ __ ] kick me off of it if I got I realistically I'm going to have to get on it and kill it nothing's going to be around me other than [ __ ] dry grass Maybe water I think that I think 20% of the time if I'm giving myself the camel in some regard I have to give myself the zebra 20% I think camel would actually be easier even though it's bigger just because he's got that long ass curved neck a hippo I'm dead hippos kill more people than sharks don't hippos kill more people than any other animal hippos uh [ __ ] people up Panda how much does a panda weigh two to three two 3 feet tall 250 lb are they aggressive it's on the same level as has like a gorilla like a weaker gorilla like a more reasonable gorilla fight but I think that pandas can be really mean and they're also fairly large I think I'm going zero it just has more capability like I know a lot of people are like dude you're really not going to give yourself the panda but you're going to give you're going to give yourself the zebra 20% of the time yes just because the zebra doesn't have the ability to grab me whereas a panda could hurt me in that okay what is that I think that's a wilderbeast or is that a Buffalo or a bull I think that's a bull a bull and a cow both of those are zero uh I've been around bulls and cows and they can rush you like really [ __ ] quickly you would think that cows aren't fast they [ __ ] AR or a bison or a buffalo either way I'm both dead those two animals in the cow family are going to murder me just by sheer weight you know they weigh like a th000 2,000 lbs they're just going to [ __ ] run me over they're going to kill me is that a honey badger it's the Tasmanian Devil the Tasmanian Devil is a carnivorous marsupial where the hell do these things live oh Australia shocker there things from [ __ ] Australia Tasmanian devil from Tasmania oh that thing's dead I yeah it might be able to crawl up my body I'd [ __ ] throw that [ __ ] off so fast I know it's carnivorous it has a top speed of 8.5 miles hour saw that [ __ ] on Google uh I could outrun this [ __ ] if I need a breather and he weighs like 30 lb I'm killing him now if it's the Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil that's a different story but this thing's dead a walrus I think a walrus recently drowned an aquarium keeper am I wrong I think a walrus recently killed somebody yeah in 2023 a walrus held two men tight and dragged them underwater and killed them it also just has so much fat on it that I couldn't damage it killer whale is not even a [ __ ] question uh I don't know what the [ __ ] this is I've never even seen that a dingo that is not a hyena chat it's an extinct animal file Scene It is an extinct animal why am I fighting this extinct animal oh it was alive recently there's like photos of it and but now they're all dead it's just like uh like a tiny dog hyena hybrid I'm killing it not even close it's extinct that's telling you something chat am I right that's a snow leopard o GG's I think that's a beluga whale an elephant an ant okay is it a colony of ants I feel like I have to make that more more interesting ant is Zer there's no shot an ant beats me if there's like a colony of like a million ants and they start crawling on my body and like biting me a chimp is an honest match there are people who have gotten mauled by chimpanzees to the point where their face is unrecognizable a one chimpanzee is estimated to have the equivalent strength strength of five average men it was once said that an agitated Chimp in uganda's cibal Forest once held a park ranger's arm so tightly that he broke his bones I'm winning a lot less of these fights than I thought I would they're just so tiny you're you're telling me this thing has the strength of five men five average men I think I'm stronger than the average man I think I would I think I'm 1.5 times stronger than the average man I think the average American what how much do you think an average American can bench the average male untrained can bench 135 lb I can bench 260 so it's still got a strength diff by about two and a half no no m whatever way we look at this even if I'm two times as strong as the average man this thing is five times as strong as the average man making it at least two and a half times stronger than me I don't know if it gets on me I'm dead if if it could really just squeeze somebody arms that tight that it die they're basic yeah they're just muscle it's not going to punch it's going to grab me and bite me and eat me or not eat me but like grab bite injure it's going to break my bones I'm dead I'm dead I wish I had the chance against the chimp here now is there anything I could grab in this chimp's habitat that I could use against it like a stick that's all I'm going to find if I'm fighting a chimp in its habitat I'm all I'm getting is a stick here and what am i g to do with that it's going to swat it out of my hands and then [ __ ] latch onto me uh zero penguin I'm o do I have to fight a penguin in the water I'm fighting it in the cold not necessarily actually but I'm fighting it in the water penguins are are more recognizably prey and if I if I'm fighting it in like a half and half cuz I think Penguins the majority of the time are out of the water so I think this this territory would be like half ice or half land half water I think I'm going to kill it I I think I'll give it I'm going to give it 25% just in case it gets get me in the water but even if it's aggressive they're pretty slow and I know they're fast in the water but that's really the only Advantage it's going to have I'm going to leave penguin 25% chance of it winning 75 me is that an emu how big are emu 5.7 feet tall 1.75 m it looks frail it looks fragile chat this is a very lowquality image of an emu but look at it it looks very fragile I think I kicked that thing 5050 [ __ ] out of here it weighs 121 lb males weigh 121b I'd say 75 just cuz it's shorter than me and it it just has it's just it's it's a smaller version of an ostrich I'm not giving I'm I'm definitely above that if I'm giving myself 20% on an ostrich I'm at least giving myself 50% a hyena I think is a 50% matchup I think that is the epitome of I have a chance of beating this thing but it also might kill me but aren't hyenas pretty small how big is a hyena a hyena is the same size as wolf [ __ ] what would what chat what do you think's scarier a hyena or a wolf hyenas are also pack animals are hyenas or Wolves stronger hyenas are larger more powerful stronger and more intelligent than wolves [ __ ] n I'm giving myself an ostrich and a wolf I'm giving myself the hyena 20% I'm giving it I don't care is that a [ __ ] pelican what animal is this it's some stupid bird I'm killing it it doesn't matter what it is it's [ __ ] dead that's a w a beast I said my odds against a w a beast were better than a zebra therefore it's com in the 20% category that is a dog I think a dog is the epitome of a 50/50 I think that's the better that's a better 50/50 I think that's a great dane I'm going to say this just categorizes large dog large dog category if it's a [ __ ] great dane there's a good chance I die I'm saying 50 I think that's fair Bobcat how big is a bobcat I've seen videos of bobcats uh try and run up on people and it's pretty terrifying I'm going to go zero I think ooh but I'm giving myself the wolf man I really am I like I feel like I'm I'm I'm [ __ ] this up right now I'm giving myself the Woolf for the hyena but I'm not giving myself the Bobcat how big is a bobcat 40 pounds I'm killing it what [ __ ] thing am I thinking of that's bigger than a bobcat oh this a mountain lion oh a bobcat I'm murdering on second thought I'm going to go 75% chance on the Bobcat we're going to do the we're going to do the mountain line or cougar or whatever this is that's a zero this is just another dog or is that a wolf dog 50 shot that's a dingo 50% chance on the dingo actually 75 on the dingo it looks small an octopus what type of octopus I think if it's a big octopus it's going to suction and cut me to death I don't know man it really depends what octopus it is I'm going 50% I know they're really smart but it's like yeah underwater I think I could [ __ ] just squeeze it I think if I got a hold of its [ __ ] stupid weird bubish head I'd just go and I'd [ __ ] ring it out i' [ __ ] ring it like a like a wet washcloth dude I'd [ __ ] grab its stupid fat head that looks like Squidward and I'd just [ __ ] go they have eight hearts I'd [ __ ] Crush its skull if I got a if I got my hands on that [ __ ] it's just whether or not he like wraps me down right I could feel like I feel like an octopus could put me in a straight jacket I'd just be like [ __ ] sitting there you know is that a spider dead is that an armadillo dead they don't have bones I don't give a [ __ ] that I don't have bones chat I'm going to [ __ ] smush its brain are you getting this oh this is the poisonous octopus I'm dead I know that one eight ring octopus it kills me it kills me I'm dead against that [ __ ] thing Snow Fox dead kitten I wouldn't want to kill it dead Pitbull okay so we are doing dog classification here let's just do let's just do broad dog and then we'll do Pitbull I think I have a better chance against a Great Dane than a pit bull I think the mobility of a Great Dane is lower even though it's larger and he has a worse bite force Pit bulles were bred to kill each other so I think I'm going to go 20% of the yeah 20% of the time I think I'm going to kick it and it's going to pass out but the other 20% it bites my arm breaks my right arm and then it starts just [ __ ] mauling me that's a jellyfish I'm assuming it's poisonous dead that's a stupid bee killing it I'm not allergic to bees a squirrel 100% dead I'm murdering that [ __ ] thing Alvin and the Chipmunks that might be a chipmunk that'd be even easier actually I feel like that'd be harder you'd get around me that's a lemur of sorts what type of monkey is that that's a baboon are baboons strong they're less strong than humans who have trained and are in good physical condition you ain't no chimp pal you ain't no chimp buddy get in that [ __ ] green bracket buddy I'm killing your dumb ass it's over they have big teeth I don't give a [ __ ] it would freak me out they always have like [ __ ] that are like protruding is that a baboon whatever that monkey is whenever they stand up and they have like a pink butt and it looks like their [ __ ] prolapsed it's disgusting I [ __ ] hate looking at those animals actually I don't know if that would that would get this video demonetized editor start looking up um pictures of uh the the monkey butt that I'm talking about where it looks like a prolapse anus uh I don't know uh no don't throw it on screen no don't throw it on on screen actually don't throw it on screen never mind instead show a picture of George Lopez he's a great guy he's very very he's very good to look at and I I always have his uh his uh song stuck in my head leeches dead a platypus platypi aren't they poisonous aren't they poisonous I believe they're poisonous but I think in this I don't think it's going to immediately poison me I think I'm still killing Perry I think Perry the Platypus is dead here he's got like a duck bill and stupid [ __ ] webbed fingers I think I'm going to curb stomp him that's a black widow spider I I'm still killing it it's just whether or not I die after so it's still dead uh a turtle a sea turtle I really don't think they would put up a fight right I know sea turtles are big but like what the [ __ ] am I going to do I don't know I don't know about I'll put a sea turtle on 75 just cuz I'm fighting it underwater that's an antelope those are pretty small I think I'm giving myself 75 there actually I'm going to give myself 100 there I know they're not like weak but they're smaller than me I'm killing it it's not big I've seen them in real life before they're not big a snake I'm going to kill it right but I'm going to die after like say it bites me I think that's a fair I think I'm going to throw it in 20 I think I'm killing it every time I think I have to throw it in 20 though because I'm gonna die if it bites me one time I'm gon I'm gonna die in this scenario right cuz it's poisonous it bites me I just grab it and now I [ __ ] kill it like I step on I throw it on the ground I step on it I [ __ ] throw a rock at it a mouse GG's for that cppy bar yo I love cppy baras but those things are 100% of the time dying they are not built for survival [ __ ] that's just a big hamster goldfish dead what the [ __ ] is that is that man bear pig from South Park I'm [ __ ] GG's from that I'm losing that 110 times those are barnacles the [ __ ] how am I going to die to a barnacle that is a hamster another that's a guinea pig that thing's dead too ladybug I wouldn't kill it it's bad luck I'll let it kill me that's a boore dead snapping turtle H now we're into an interesting territory I don't think I think a snapping turtle am I going to see it do I have to fight it in murky water snapping turtles bite can bite through your bone their bite force is so strong that they could like bite your arm in half if I'm fighting it in murky water it's definitely going to Gravely injure me it's just whether or not I pick it up and then [ __ ] hurt it but even if I do pick it up he's just going to huddle in his [ __ ] thing until I until until I leave and then he's going to come back out and kill me I'm dead I think 20% of the time I get lucky and maybe I pick him up and then I just start jumping on his shell until I crush his brittle [ __ ] body that's hiding in that [ __ ] shell of his that's a tree frog it might be poisonous but I'm killing it that's a bat dead pig dead a sunbear what the [ __ ] is a sunbear oh sunbears are the bears that look like somebody wearing a mask and they're like really stupid like somebody hit him in the head with a mallet they're probably pretty they're still Bears though right I mean that that I have to take into account it can chop wood with its claws and shatter it with Paw swipes or chew straight through wood okay it is GG's for the sunbear I am dead just like every other bear a the red panda they're so tiny and they get jump scared now I got to show a funny video of a red panda and then you're like little cute panda bear and then he and then he walks up they're very skittish yeah they they kind of freak out looks like he almost had a [ __ ] heart attack right there had no idea what to do I'm killing it I wouldn't want to kill it I think I might wait until I starve to death as a means not to kill that animal oh God they can't do me like this these are the some of the animals that I don't want to kill red panda dead otter dead wouldn't want to kill it though Goose oh oh when I tell you put me up against a [ __ ] how about this this is the goose and Swan category if you put me against a stupid [ __ ] Swan I would walk up I would hear him he would walk up to me I would just [ __ ] grab his neck and just [ __ ] toss his dumbass you ever see the videos of when [ __ ] Swan's try and bother people and like an old man walks up and just grabs it by the neck and throws it he like starts harassing this guy and he's like big doging him some old ass video look at it he just grabs that [ __ ] look at him stupid ass animal I have no idea how it's alive yeah I'm killing that thing give me a 10-second fight GG's what is that is that a a python is that one of those like 10- foot snakes I don't think I would be able to kill a python or a boa constrictor rather do you think that like Brian Shaw could kill a boa constrictor world's strongest man also very big Brian Brian Shaw is like seven feet tall and 400 pounds I don't think I don't know how how much the boa constrictor has range wise to wrap around him and I think he's just going to go and just [ __ ] like just open that [ __ ] up I think Brian Shaw could kill B Constructor I don't think I could I think I'm dead a million times I think it's going to wrap around me it's going to just strength death me that's a mosquito does it have malaria no dead and it wouldn't kill me that quick blue W that's not even oh God no wrong one blue whale I mean it wouldn't want to kill me but it would just run into me swimming and I'd probably die Brute Force that's a twocan what a random what a random bird to add into this steer list a [ __ ] twocan seahorse yo fun fact do you know that um clown fish can change their sex so in Finding Nemo when uh when the when Nemo's mom dies the the dad Carl actually would become a woman and become the mother of Nemo seahorses are also the only animal where the male gets pregnant but they can change their uh genitals and they'll start like producing eggs and [ __ ] so it's an inaccurate movie Disney maybe get your [ __ ] [ __ ] up okay maybe maybe why don't you consult some [ __ ] animal marine biologist experts before you decide to make a [ __ ] movie about clownish okay okay Executives dead dead don't even know what it is it's cute but it's dead dolphin I'm dead I'm pretty sure dolphins are like one of if not the smartest animal outside of humans I'm also fighting it in the water it's over that is a flying squirrel GG's that's a [ __ ] praying mantis GG's what the [ __ ] is that this is a llama I'm killing a llama I think I'm killing a llama 75% of the time I know they're big but if I'm already killing a camel I'm killing a [ __ ] llama killing a camel 20% I'm killing a llama 75 and Packa doesn't matter some some animal that spits all right well that's the that's the confirmed W tier chat w w tier list I mean you know there's a lot of animals that I I lose to actually more animals I lose to easily than I than I actually no more animals I beat easily than I lose so I'm going to take that as a win I think it's uh fairly you know obviously 100% of the time and 0% of the time not as interesting as some of the lucky contenders here I really do think I have a chance to get an against an ostrich a hyena a kangaroo maybe not a hyena do we want to change anything around here you're losing to a ladybug I said I wouldn't want to kill a ladybug I'm going to kill the ladybug we'll move him down the eagle chat chat I'm not dying to I'm going to Google if Eagles have ever killed people while while it did Kill A Child it didn't kill a full-grown human they're known to kill big birds like that are known to kill like infants I really don't think it would kill me chat well that's the L W [ __ ] W [ __ ] tier list hope you all enjoyed watching that segment [Music] um

now we&#39;re moving on to the second segment of the stream here quite possibly the most controversial segment we are doing an animal tier list now you might be asking yourself what the is an animal tier list we&#39;re going to be raiding these animals on How likely I am to beat them in a fight floating cantaloupe made this tier list W floating calou thank you for making the tier list for me we&#39;re going to do the tiers based on the odds that I beat them in a death match okay this is hand to hand combat or hand to PA combat hand to th combat whatever animal we&#39;re fighting I also see Mark Zuckerberg&#39;s on the west you know that&#39;ll be a nice one and the only rules for this are number one I would have no weapons right this is a hypothetical thing I&#39;m going to be giving obviously my take you guys are going to be sharing your take on whether or not I would win or you would win in general like I&#39;m not going to have a knife in this hypothetical or a gun or anything I&#39;m I&#39;m I&#39;m in a ring in their habitat that is the other rule I&#39;m fighting them where they live obviously I&#39;m a human I&#39;m like more intelligent than the majority of these animals so it would be unfair if I fought a shark on the land right because they&#39;re going to suffocate they&#39;re going to die that&#39;s what it is obviously first tier we have 0% I&#39;m dead this is reserved for animals that I think I have no chance of beating in any scenario whatsoever 20% chance of winning right I could get lucky these are reserved for animals where I&#39;m likely to lose but there&#39;s a chance that I could beat them 50% even match if we fought 100 times I would die 50 they would die die 50 75 means I&#39;m basically guaranteed going to win this fight unless something really [ __ ] up here I I I&#39;m I&#39;m probably going to win and then 100% is I&#39;m I&#39;m murdering this thing I&#39;m going to [ __ ] kick its ass into the ground I&#39;m going to shove its face into the [ __ ] dirt and curb stomp it it&#39;s going to die so fast it&#39;s not even going to put up a fight okay first one I don&#39;t know okay we&#39;ll start with it it&#39;s an ostrich it&#39;s head is cut off but you can see that it&#39;s an ostrich now ostriches are fairly tall and weigh twice as much as me I believe the average weight let me look up some stats here for the ostrich the average ostrich is anywhere between 7 and 9 ft tall and they weigh between 250 and 300 lb now to put that in perspective for you guys rating we&#39;ll do a little we&#39;ll do a little rotation on the Joe Bart&#39;s fit here uh as well as my uh you know just athletic capabilities I&#39;m 61 and I weigh 178 pounds can&#39;t see the quads I have good quads I have good quads I need that to be noted for this match I will be able to use my legs here I have small Cavs we&#39;re not going to show them now I&#39;m probably going to be describing some fighting strategies that I&#39;m going to have against some of these animals the ostrich is you know going to be a hard match I I&#39;m going to say that I don&#39;t know how this is my general strategy against the ostrich the ostrich is obviously much taller than me they don&#39;t have hands they have WI things and feet now they can Peck me to death and stop me to death but they&#39;re also a bit skittish I think my strategy here is uh I&#39;m not going to be able to Brute Force beat this thing to death it outweighs me but as you can see it has a skinny [ __ ] neck ostrich&#39;s necks are not that big I think that I&#39;m going to [ __ ] jump up on its back and then just [ __ ] you know burn the [ __ ] out of out of its [ __ ] out of its neck I&#39;m going to be rubbing its neck I&#39;m gonna be choking it seeing if I could kill it my choke its neck how thick is an ostrich&#39;s neck let&#39;s look that up they look fairly skinny chat here I&#39;m I&#39;m just I&#39;m just thinking if I pull up an image right now I think I kill that thing and if I get on if I get on and I grip right I do some forearm exercises for a for a few months before okay that&#39;s uh that&#39;s that&#39;s cheating we&#39;re in my condition right now I&#39;m fighting them I think I could get near the top of its head and just [ __ ] ring it it neck it&#39;ll Peck me not if I&#39;m on its back I think i&#39; I think it&#39;s unlikely that I would win against an ostrich but I think I would win 20% of the time I think I could get lucky here I think about I&#39;m fighting an ostrich say a 100 times I fight it to the death I think 20 of those I&#39;m winning honestly I&#39;d say maybe even 50 I&#39;d say zero it&#39;s not a zero chat it&#39;s not a zero if you&#39;re telling me if I fought this thing a hundred times I&#39;m dying a 100 times no no there&#39;s there&#39;s there&#39;s at least a couple where I [ __ ] shove his face into the dirt and I [ __ ] kill that [ __ ] a bear now I used to have the bad take okay now this is a really bad take so I I I know I know it&#39;s I know it&#39;s bad but we got to share it I used to think that I could kill a bear with a Bowie knife I you I that was like an honest I I genuinely used to believe that if I was going against like a a small you know midsized brown bear that I could murder it if you gave me a knife I don&#39;t even have a knife in this scenario even if I did think I&#39;d die I think if I had a small pistol I&#39;d still die I watched a video of bear&#39;s claws editor throw up an image of bears claws here they are like 5 in thick and they can [ __ ] they would it would just slash me it would be if I if you put me in the woods with a bear even in a ring it would be 10 seconds it would go and just slash me one time doesn&#39;t even need to bite me and I would immediately die it would decapitate me it might bite my head off it might jump on me and just the sheer weight of this thing is going to [ __ ] kill me uh so yeah now 0% I&#39;m dying now kangaroo now here&#39;s where I&#39;m a bit more confident in my capabilities here I I know that kangaroo I recently found this out kangaroo do drown dogs for fun I didn&#39;t know that I had a chatter share that info with me for a while they&#39;re kind of psychopaths I&#39;ve never met a kangaroo I don&#39;t live in a Australia they apparently like kill animals like domestic animals for fun and they can like kick you to death and they&#39;re kind of natural-born boxers to that I need to show you the build of a kangaroo they got really short arms they&#39;re going for the ranged kicks their legs are that&#39;s a small one these car these ones are kind of small but it&#39;s the same thing when they&#39;re bigger when they fight should we watch a video of them fighting oh I forgot they could use their Tail as leeway they don&#39;t have a soft tail they have they have a strong tail here see but it kind of looks like they&#39;re doing like a shitty High School fight where they&#39;re like you know they look it&#39;s just I I how tall are they I need to look up some stats I need to look up some stats here bro their arms are so [ __ ] short though I I would I okay my original strategy if I&#39;m honestly being real was to again get behind it but I think it&#39;s Tail&#39;s Gonna Save it from falling over I was thinking if I get this thing to the [ __ ] ground I put it in a [ __ ] headlock I get I I wedge it&#39;s like jiujitsu dude I don&#39;t even know Jiu-Jitsu but I&#39;ve seen [ __ ] I&#39;m gonna get that [ __ ] in a spil or whatever I&#39;m going to wrap my arm around that [ __ ] that fucker&#39;s neck and I&#39;m GNA hold his [ __ ] arms back and it&#39;s just going to be like it&#39;s going to be done I think I kill it I think I kill it to the death to the death chat it might be able to knock me out how is it killing me is it going to stomp on me it might knock me out a few times but I&#39;m gonna be like Rocky dude I&#39;m gonna get back up I&#39;m gonna get back up and I&#39;m GNA go and then I&#39;m going to hear and then I&#39;m going to start fighting that [ __ ] again right it&#39;ll drown me I don&#39;t know oh my God imagine if a [ __ ] K imagine that we actually pan this out and there&#39;s just like a 240p video of a kangaroo just [ __ ] holding me underwater I&#39;m like so confident here and it&#39;s just like it&#39;s just like a shitty video it&#39;s just like so far away somebody filming like a [ __ ] noia and just be drowning from a kangaroo dude I&#39;m going 50 I&#39;m going 50 I think to the death there&#39;s an even shot I have I think I could bludge in this thing with my [ __ ] fists is that a crocodile or an alligator either way I&#39;m dead I&#39;m fighting them in their territory we don&#39;t even need to talk about that [ __ ] you ever see when they death roll someone I&#39;m not even going to be able to kill this thing like there&#39;s no strategy to kill this thing with my bare hands it has armor if there&#39;s a 0.001% chance I kill a bear if it trips on its own foot and [ __ ] passes out and then I just beat it to death this thing is killing me every single time I fight it I&#39;m never beating a crocodile even if I got on its back it&#39;s just going to it I&#39;m just going to sit there and and then eventually it&#39;s just going to kill me just want to point out I&#39;ve seen a SI 62 200lb man get put into a coma by a kangaroo 20% he&#39;s not me right 20% I&#39;ll lower it a little bit Rhino I don&#39;t I don&#39;t even know a rhino it&#39;s not even a de it&#39;s just would I survive like could I make it out in time this isn&#39;t like a kangaroo I&#39;m scrapping this [ __ ] to the death the Rhino once that Bell dings and he starts charging me I just have to run he&#39;s hit me with his horn and then I&#39;m dead and he&#39;s going to [ __ ] eat me it&#39;s over for that I feel like a rhino could outrun me a rhino could surely outrun me rhinos can run 34 miles an hour that is faster than the fastest human ever that has ever lived husan ball what if you have a knife dude it&#39;s a [ __ ] Rhino I used to convince myself that I could kill like a silver back gorilla with a knife as well because I was like oh similar weight change right I have a weapon but it&#39;s just a massive size diff it&#39;s just a massive size and at this point it&#39;s just like what am I going to I&#39;m going to stab him then what you give me a knife I stab him and he&#39;s just going to tank that [ __ ] I think for me to kill a rhino I would have to have a genuine assault rifle like I would have to lay into that thing it&#39;s over a a giraffe it&#39;s still over giraffe a lot of people are probably thinking oh you know that you might not be able to die because what is it going to do maybe but they swing their heads if you&#39;ve never seen giraffe fight they throw their necks around and whack each other in the head until one of them either dies or gives up oh that was a weak hit what are they tired is this in slow motion I&#39;ve seen ones where they&#39;re putting [ __ ] effort into this what the hell&#39;s happening what type of [ __ ] giraffe fight is this that one&#39;s got a pair on him you see that Jesus come on put a little more effort into it okay now you&#39;re making me think I could kill you yeah there we go now they&#39;re head each other this shit&#39;s in slow mode but you could tell you could tell he got that wind up he got that wind up Bonk right into the ass dude he would hit me in the head and I&#39;d Die it&#39;d be like getting kicked by a horse I think I lose even if the reason I throw giraff here immediately is just because even if it doesn&#39;t kill me like say it can&#39;t reach me with its neck how am I going to kill a giraffe with my bare hands that&#39;s just not going to happen a camel same [ __ ] thing dude size death same [ __ ] thing a camel like what am I going to do I&#39;m hly hear me out get up on its back right cuz I&#39;m assuming we&#39;re going to start fairly close to each other I get on its back and I just sit on its neck and then he just gets tired and dies I I I just I literally just sit on his neck until he [ __ ] collapses from exhaustion they&#39;re also quite passive yeah I&#39;m assuming they wouldn&#39;t really put up that much of a fight like I don&#39;t think a camel would try and kill me are we presuming that in this scenario the animal wants me dead I&#39;m not agitating it we&#39;re both starting in we&#39;re fighting to the death it wants to kill me okay that might move the ostrich I really think I have a better chance to get a against a kangaroo than an ostrich I&#39;m going to keep the camel at 20 Mark Zuckerberg doesn&#39;t he know jiujitsu this is the skin walker category I think Mark Zuckerberg&#39;s probably going to kill me because Mark Zuckerberg knows martial arts yeah I think I&#39;m dead against Mark doesn&#39;t he have like a black belt okay silver back gorilla another 100% dead I believe silver back gorillas are maybe shorter than me but they weigh a lot they weigh 430 lb while it may only be 5T they&#39;re [ __ ] huge like that bro oh like what would I even do it would be like a fist fight you know you know what you know how this would pan out he grabs me by my sides and just [ __ ] smashes me into the ground just non-stop just punch me and it&#39;s going to be like ooh and then I&#39;m dead in like six punches my head&#39;s going to be flattened like a pancake I&#39;m dead I need some winds here I&#39;m starting to get I&#39;m starting to get discouraged I don&#39;t have anything that I could easily be an orangutang an orangutan big arms kind of lanky though eat a lot of fruit 100 pounds I think I could [ __ ] murder that thing 100 lb oo long arms though are they strong anybody know orangutan pretty built I know they eat a lot of fruit I think I think he&#39;s kind of like what&#39;s that one Star Wars character that holds four lightsabers and he&#39;s like a robot it&#39;s going to be like fighting that guy like General something General Grievous yeah it&#39;s going to be like fighting General Grievous here I think an orangutan&#39;s probably going to [ __ ] most people up in a fight just because he has reach and I think he&#39;s gonna I don&#39;t think it&#39;s going to be a boxing match right like kangaroo we&#39;re just going to be [ __ ] swinging he&#39;s not going to grab me I&#39;m probably not going to grab him we&#39;re just going to be [ __ ] fist fighting autan Strat I already know he&#39;s going to hug me and then he&#39;s probably just going to try and [ __ ] maybe get me in a headlock of sorts I don&#39;t know if he&#39;s that smart but I&#39;m pretty sure orangutans are one of the smartest Apes I&#39;m going to go 20% chance just by the weight diff I think I I&#39;m I think I&#39;m I think I&#39;m going to kill it weightwise but I think it has the smarts it has the reach pretty slow animal though I&#39;m going to go 20% I think I win 20% for sure is that a deer or a buck that&#39;s a buck [ __ ] [ __ ] I don&#39;t know I I I&#39;ve always thought that bucks are pretty weak like 150 lb Buck I I know that they have the horns and if you get past the antlers I think that I could just ludge in this animal right I don&#39;t want to be gruesome here but I think I could probably just jump on its back snap all of its [ __ ] weak ass legs and then just beat it to to death okay I think if I&#39;m in the mindset of I need to kill this thing I&#39;m taking out its [ __ ] legs I&#39;m breaking its front two legs and it&#39;s going to be [ __ ] face hugging the ground and then I&#39;m just going to [ __ ] kill it I think I&#39;m going to lose a fraction of this time I think the fractions of the time I think the times that I lose is when it hits me with the antlers I think if it hits me with the antlers it&#39;s going to impale my body and then I&#39;m going to die but I think that 75% % of the time here against a midsized buck I think I&#39;m almost surely going to win and now chat this isn&#39;t me saying that I&#39;m not going to get injured a many of these fights the 20% that I do win I think I&#39;m going to be borderline in a coma I think I&#39;m going to be walking out of that fight with one arm and and my eyeball missing but I think I&#39;m living I&#39;m killing it before I die a moose zero I think people don&#39;t realize how Big Moose are or me whatever the [ __ ] it is if you look up like moose can size comparison they are [ __ ] huge they&#39;re bigger than most cars in almost every horse you&#39;ve ever seen uh and they also get agitated pretty quick like this is just a regular moose walking in like a parking lot it&#39;s like if it stood up tall it would be like all the way near the top of the tree it cowers over these [ __ ] cars and hitting a moose in a car a little fun fact here is also a death sentence cuz if you hit a deer you usually run that [ __ ] over or it hits your bumper if you hit a moose in a car you take out its legs and then its whole body falls into the windshield and you die so moose kill a lot of people in Maine and other places where moose exists anyways uh if I&#39;m fighting this thing there&#39;s absolutely no strategy here if I&#39;m bare fist there&#39;s no damage that I that is being done uh I think I&#39;m going to immediately die question can we add something here to where if I&#39;m in their habitat am I able like say right when the bell rings am I allowed to grab Like a Rock like say I&#39;m fighting like a moose and I find a stone am I able as a human to say I&#39;m going to use my surroundings to fight this thing I I don&#39;t think it&#39;s changing any of the answers as of right now anyways a sloth I [ __ ] I chat I kill a sloth with e it would be five [ __ ] seconds and that thing would be dead not only cuz it&#39;s slow it&#39;s also weak it&#39;s just it&#39;s going to slow-mo claw you it&#39;s it have I seen their claws I don&#39;t give a [ __ ] that [ __ ] ding ding ding and then I grab its arm and I go and it&#39;s done what the [ __ ] is this crab a spider crab oh they&#39;re they&#39;re very very large CBS I I just think they&#39;re so like not I I like I think if I kicked its legs they would fall off where am I fighting this thing where are spider crab where do spider crabs live they live on the sea floor and I&#39;m fighting it in its habitat am I I&#39;m assuming I&#39;m allowed like scuba gear so I don&#39;t suffocate like this is unfair if I&#39;m fighting something at the bottom of the sea floor no no mask nothing cuz I&#39;m just going to drown so I have oxygen I have oxygen but I I&#39;m not using any of the oxygen or like a tank to help fight I&#39;m just on the bottom of the ocean floor fighting this [ __ ] thing I still think I murder it I know it&#39;s big and I know it has claws but you got to keep in mind that it&#39;s like if it plunges at me I&#39;m going to grab two of its o but it&#39;s going to it has multiple claws I&#39;m only going to be able to take two claws on at once I don&#39;t think I&#39;m going to win every fight because I think there are scenarios where like I grab its two big claws and then it kind of impales me with its other ones that are like sharp I think I&#39;m going to be a bit more nervous in the water I&#39;m going to move slower I think that I have a 75% chance an eagle is dead an eagle Eagle&#39;s got a eagles&#39;s got a chance an eagle&#39;s got no it doesn&#39;t it doesn&#39;t I&#39;m G to kill it it&#39;s a bird it has weak wings while it might Peck me and Claw me or rip my eyes out I grab its wing one time and it [ __ ] rips it off I&#39;m going to murder that thing Bo Birds bones are brittle they&#39;re weak I don&#39;t give a [ __ ] chat I know an eagle is it&#39;s not it&#39;s dead it&#39;s dead a bald eagle weighs 14 pounds chat chat chats get that through your [ __ ] head okay you&#39;re saying do 20% [ __ ] it weighs 14 [ __ ] pounds that is a toddler I don&#39;t care what its wingspan is grabbit Wings rip it&#39;s gone it&#39;s gone I punch it one time it can fly I don&#39;t give a [ __ ] it&#39;s G to have to come down and fight me and hey I&#39;m in its habitat guess what I&#39;m going to be doing Rock snipe snipe snipe once I see it dive bombing me I Chuck a rock up and it [ __ ] hits it in the face it passes out I sniped that [ __ ] out of the air 0% chance that eagle has on me none it has sharp claws it weighs 14b is that a jaguar or a puma or a cheetah I don&#39;t know I think that&#39;s a jaguar or a leopard oh my God I don&#39;t know they&#39;re they&#39;re too similar for me either way it doesn&#39;t matter I don&#39;t I don&#39;t even need I don&#39;t even need to know what animal that is I know it&#39;s some weird version of a big cat I&#39;m dead that thing literally could hunt people same thing here no there&#39;s actually not even a need for me to talk about them it&#39;s it&#39;s that quick that I&#39;m dying a tiger is going to immediately claw me to death bite me it&#39;s going to bite my juggler it&#39;s going to start eating me while I&#39;m still living lion same thing it&#39;s done okay now we are into a serious conversation a wolf one wolf not two not a pack okay I have a friend that genuinely believes that he could kill two wolves with his bare hands he&#39;s a psychopath they&#39;re going to kill you okay but one wolf it&#39;s it now here&#39;s the thing wolves are pack animals or I don&#39;t know if that&#39;s that&#39;s not a coyote I think that&#39;s wolf wolves are pack animals they fight together right they&#39;re scared of not fighting together we&#39;re eliminating that if this is a real life scenario and there&#39;s one wolf in me it&#39;s going to run away it&#39;s not going to fight me right it might try and bite me the second I punch it it&#39;s going to run this wolf wants to kill me it&#39;s willing to fight me to the death how big is this wolf that&#39;s what matters the biggest male wolf weighs 100 lb so a very large dog that&#39;s kind of scary looking at it compared to this woman that&#39;s sitting down because you if I show this oh my God you guys are going to immediately say I&#39;m not going to kill it they&#39;re they&#39;re very large they&#39;re they&#39;re they don&#39;t weigh a lot this is some guy holding a dead wolf it&#39;s a very big dog but look at it this guy killed it right Paul Blart Bert killed it right he had a gun I&#39;m just saying 100 pound wolf and that&#39;s like I&#39;m used to okay here it is here&#39;s a better size comparison what is that that looks like a prehistoric wolf that&#39;s a real wolf 35 to 75 kilograms this guy&#39;s probably what is he 170 cm or 180 cm 180 cm I really don&#39;t know I think this is a 50/50 and I know a lot of you guys are saying I&#39;m dying here but it&#39;s basically me fighting a very big dog and I know it has its mouth but realistically I think a strat ooh I don&#39;t know I don&#39;t know like am I so angry that I don&#39;t feel pain cuz realistically I could sacrifice my left arm I could go out for the bait it grabs my left arm and I just start [ __ ] wailing if it because I&#39;m thinking it grabs my arm it&#39;s going to go it&#39;s going to do that thing that dogs do where they go and they shake and it like rips your skin that&#39;s going to hurt like a [ __ ] like I that like even if I&#39;m hyped up on adrenaline that&#39;s going to really hurt me like it&#39;s whether or not I think I could kill it it&#39;s whether or not I die before it kills me these the big cats I&#39;m not able to kill right I think if you gave me 10 seconds of an advantage on this wolf I lock my legs around its body and my arms around its head and I think I choke it to death or I punch it to death it&#39;s just whether or not I get into that scenario I think I got a I think I got a 50 or a 20% shot I I think high 20s I think 100 fights I kill it 20 times a great white shark is going to immediately be a 0% chance I don&#39;t even know what I would do I think that&#39;s the lowest odds out of anything we&#39;ve seen thus far just because I&#39;m in the water a sea lion I don&#39;t think that&#39;s a sea lion or a seal CH I don&#39;t think that&#39;s a seal is that a seal oh that&#39;s a sea lion sea lion versus seal a sea lion do I have to fight it in the water I feel like a sea Lion&#39;s kind of it&#39;s a mammal but its habitat is the water I know few people that go scuba diving and if you you&#39;re around like a baby sea lion they&#39;ll attack you like the parents will attack you could I kill a sea lion if I&#39;m on land no doubt it&#39;s just slow got no Mobility looking like a goddamn hot dog I&#39;m going to kill that thing in the water I&#39;m dead am I fighting it on land or in the water it&#39;s it&#39;s made for the water so I think I would have to fight in in the water they&#39;re huge how big are sea lions 850 pounds it&#39;s GG&#39;s it&#39;s GG&#39;s no chance 850 lbs [ __ ] I thought they&#39;d be like 150 is that a uh kodo not a komodo is that a kodo dragon what is it called I&#39;ve seen videos of a kodo dragon eat I don&#39;t even know if I would show this on YouTube I&#39;ve seen videos of a kodo dragon eat a mediumsized goat hole in one bite didn&#39;t even chew it they have they carry diseases they&#39;re fast and aggressive I think it would swallow me uh I think it would claw me and it really hurt and then it would swallow me I don&#39;t know what this guy&#39;s doing standing next to this [ __ ] thing I think I would lose I&#39;m saying like oh there&#39;s a chance I could live long enough to do something but if I lived long enough to do something I&#39;m really not going to hurt it like a lot of these big reptiles like crocodiles they&#39;re just so hard that me bludgeoning it with whatever object I could find like I would have to stab it I would have to stab it and I don&#39;t know if in its habitat I&#39;m going to find something sharp enough within 15 seconds in my general surroundings to murder it no chance koalas do have chlamydia but that&#39;s not going to kill me and that would be post fight a koala I think I&#39;m going to kill the majority of the time at least let me look up size of a koala they weigh anywhere between 29 to 33 lbs yeah they&#39;re little dudes here&#39;s one here&#39;s one with former president Barack Obama holding a chyia koala maybe this one doesn&#39;t have chyia we don&#39;t know not all of them do many koalas have chyia I think I kill it 100% of the time I wouldn&#39;t want to I would feel pretty bad about it but I&#39;m going to kill it I think that&#39;s a Mana Ray uh that&#39;s killing me it would sting me literally no discussion on that a zebra now this is an entertaining matchup me Joe Bart versus is a zebra in a Saharan Death Match very low stats on the zebra in terms of danger I think his real method of fighting me is biting and kicking me I think it does has a it does have a size diff little stats on a zebra here between 770 and 950 lbs wow how big are they compared to a human all right they&#39;re about the same size you can ride a zebra that&#39;s bad news it&#39;s like between a a a pony and a horse it&#39;s it&#39;s the the in between between those two they&#39;re going to kick me yeah I was fairly confident until I real I thought they were smaller I thought a zebra would be like maybe 400 lb and I think it would topple easy I think this could just [ __ ] kick me off of it if I got I realistically I&#39;m going to have to get on it and kill it nothing&#39;s going to be around me other than [ __ ] dry grass Maybe water I think that I think 20% of the time if I&#39;m giving myself the camel in some regard I have to give myself the zebra 20% I think camel would actually be easier even though it&#39;s bigger just because he&#39;s got that long ass curved neck a hippo I&#39;m dead hippos kill more people than sharks don&#39;t hippos kill more people than any other animal hippos uh [ __ ] people up Panda how much does a panda weigh two to three two 3 feet tall 250 lb are they aggressive it&#39;s on the same level as has like a gorilla like a weaker gorilla like a more reasonable gorilla fight but I think that pandas can be really mean and they&#39;re also fairly large I think I&#39;m going zero it just has more capability like I know a lot of people are like dude you&#39;re really not going to give yourself the panda but you&#39;re going to give you&#39;re going to give yourself the zebra 20% of the time yes just because the zebra doesn&#39;t have the ability to grab me whereas a panda could hurt me in that okay what is that I think that&#39;s a wilderbeast or is that a Buffalo or a bull I think that&#39;s a bull a bull and a cow both of those are zero uh I&#39;ve been around bulls and cows and they can rush you like really [ __ ] quickly you would think that cows aren&#39;t fast they [ __ ] AR or a bison or a buffalo either way I&#39;m both dead those two animals in the cow family are going to murder me just by sheer weight you know they weigh like a th000 2,000 lbs they&#39;re just going to [ __ ] run me over they&#39;re going to kill me is that a honey badger it&#39;s the Tasmanian Devil the Tasmanian Devil is a carnivorous marsupial where the hell do these things live oh Australia shocker there things from [ __ ] Australia Tasmanian devil from Tasmania oh that thing&#39;s dead I yeah it might be able to crawl up my body I&#39;d [ __ ] throw that [ __ ] off so fast I know it&#39;s carnivorous it has a top speed of 8.5 miles hour saw that [ __ ] on Google uh I could outrun this [ __ ] if I need a breather and he weighs like 30 lb I&#39;m killing him now if it&#39;s the Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil that&#39;s a different story but this thing&#39;s dead a walrus I think a walrus recently drowned an aquarium keeper am I wrong I think a walrus recently killed somebody yeah in 2023 a walrus held two men tight and dragged them underwater and killed them it also just has so much fat on it that I couldn&#39;t damage it killer whale is not even a [ __ ] question uh I don&#39;t know what the [ __ ] this is I&#39;ve never even seen that a dingo that is not a hyena chat it&#39;s an extinct animal file Scene It is an extinct animal why am I fighting this extinct animal oh it was alive recently there&#39;s like photos of it and but now they&#39;re all dead it&#39;s just like uh like a tiny dog hyena hybrid I&#39;m killing it not even close it&#39;s extinct that&#39;s telling you something chat am I right that&#39;s a snow leopard o GG&#39;s I think that&#39;s a beluga whale an elephant an ant okay is it a colony of ants I feel like I have to make that more more interesting ant is Zer there&#39;s no shot an ant beats me if there&#39;s like a colony of like a million ants and they start crawling on my body and like biting me a chimp is an honest match there are people who have gotten mauled by chimpanzees to the point where their face is unrecognizable a one chimpanzee is estimated to have the equivalent strength strength of five average men it was once said that an agitated Chimp in uganda&#39;s cibal Forest once held a park ranger&#39;s arm so tightly that he broke his bones I&#39;m winning a lot less of these fights than I thought I would they&#39;re just so tiny you&#39;re you&#39;re telling me this thing has the strength of five men five average men I think I&#39;m stronger than the average man I think I would I think I&#39;m 1.5 times stronger than the average man I think the average American what how much do you think an average American can bench the average male untrained can bench 135 lb I can bench 260 so it&#39;s still got a strength diff by about two and a half no no m whatever way we look at this even if I&#39;m two times as strong as the average man this thing is five times as strong as the average man making it at least two and a half times stronger than me I don&#39;t know if it gets on me I&#39;m dead if if it could really just squeeze somebody arms that tight that it die they&#39;re basic yeah they&#39;re just muscle it&#39;s not going to punch it&#39;s going to grab me and bite me and eat me or not eat me but like grab bite injure it&#39;s going to break my bones I&#39;m dead I&#39;m dead I wish I had the chance against the chimp here now is there anything I could grab in this chimp&#39;s habitat that I could use against it like a stick that&#39;s all I&#39;m going to find if I&#39;m fighting a chimp in its habitat I&#39;m all I&#39;m getting is a stick here and what am i g to do with that it&#39;s going to swat it out of my hands and then [ __ ] latch onto me uh zero penguin I&#39;m o do I have to fight a penguin in the water I&#39;m fighting it in the cold not necessarily actually but I&#39;m fighting it in the water penguins are are more recognizably prey and if I if I&#39;m fighting it in like a half and half cuz I think Penguins the majority of the time are out of the water so I think this this territory would be like half ice or half land half water I think I&#39;m going to kill it I I think I&#39;ll give it I&#39;m going to give it 25% just in case it gets get me in the water but even if it&#39;s aggressive they&#39;re pretty slow and I know they&#39;re fast in the water but that&#39;s really the only Advantage it&#39;s going to have I&#39;m going to leave penguin 25% chance of it winning 75 me is that an emu how big are emu 5.7 feet tall 1.75 m it looks frail it looks fragile chat this is a very lowquality image of an emu but look at it it looks very fragile I think I kicked that thing 5050 [ __ ] out of here it weighs 121 lb males weigh 121b I&#39;d say 75 just cuz it&#39;s shorter than me and it it just has it&#39;s just it&#39;s it&#39;s a smaller version of an ostrich I&#39;m not giving I&#39;m I&#39;m definitely above that if I&#39;m giving myself 20% on an ostrich I&#39;m at least giving myself 50% a hyena I think is a 50% matchup I think that is the epitome of I have a chance of beating this thing but it also might kill me but aren&#39;t hyenas pretty small how big is a hyena a hyena is the same size as wolf [ __ ] what would what chat what do you think&#39;s scarier a hyena or a wolf hyenas are also pack animals are hyenas or Wolves stronger hyenas are larger more powerful stronger and more intelligent than wolves [ __ ] n I&#39;m giving myself an ostrich and a wolf I&#39;m giving myself the hyena 20% I&#39;m giving it I don&#39;t care is that a [ __ ] pelican what animal is this it&#39;s some stupid bird I&#39;m killing it it doesn&#39;t matter what it is it&#39;s [ __ ] dead that&#39;s a w a beast I said my odds against a w a beast were better than a zebra therefore it&#39;s com in the 20% category that is a dog I think a dog is the epitome of a 50/50 I think that&#39;s the better that&#39;s a better 50/50 I think that&#39;s a great dane I&#39;m going to say this just categorizes large dog large dog category if it&#39;s a [ __ ] great dane there&#39;s a good chance I die I&#39;m saying 50 I think that&#39;s fair Bobcat how big is a bobcat I&#39;ve seen videos of bobcats uh try and run up on people and it&#39;s pretty terrifying I&#39;m going to go zero I think ooh but I&#39;m giving myself the wolf man I really am I like I feel like I&#39;m I&#39;m I&#39;m [ __ ] this up right now I&#39;m giving myself the Woolf for the hyena but I&#39;m not giving myself the Bobcat how big is a bobcat 40 pounds I&#39;m killing it what [ __ ] thing am I thinking of that&#39;s bigger than a bobcat oh this a mountain lion oh a bobcat I&#39;m murdering on second thought I&#39;m going to go 75% chance on the Bobcat we&#39;re going to do the we&#39;re going to do the mountain line or cougar or whatever this is that&#39;s a zero this is just another dog or is that a wolf dog 50 shot that&#39;s a dingo 50% chance on the dingo actually 75 on the dingo it looks small an octopus what type of octopus I think if it&#39;s a big octopus it&#39;s going to suction and cut me to death I don&#39;t know man it really depends what octopus it is I&#39;m going 50% I know they&#39;re really smart but it&#39;s like yeah underwater I think I could [ __ ] just squeeze it I think if I got a hold of its [ __ ] stupid weird bubish head I&#39;d just go and I&#39;d [ __ ] ring it out i&#39; [ __ ] ring it like a like a wet washcloth dude I&#39;d [ __ ] grab its stupid fat head that looks like Squidward and I&#39;d just [ __ ] go they have eight hearts I&#39;d [ __ ] Crush its skull if I got a if I got my hands on that [ __ ] it&#39;s just whether or not he like wraps me down right I could feel like I feel like an octopus could put me in a straight jacket I&#39;d just be like [ __ ] sitting there you know is that a spider dead is that an armadillo dead they don&#39;t have bones I don&#39;t give a [ __ ] that I don&#39;t have bones chat I&#39;m going to [ __ ] smush its brain are you getting this oh this is the poisonous octopus I&#39;m dead I know that one eight ring octopus it kills me it kills me I&#39;m dead against that [ __ ] thing Snow Fox dead kitten I wouldn&#39;t want to kill it dead Pitbull okay so we are doing dog classification here let&#39;s just do let&#39;s just do broad dog and then we&#39;ll do Pitbull I think I have a better chance against a Great Dane than a pit bull I think the mobility of a Great Dane is lower even though it&#39;s larger and he has a worse bite force Pit bulles were bred to kill each other so I think I&#39;m going to go 20% of the yeah 20% of the time I think I&#39;m going to kick it and it&#39;s going to pass out but the other 20% it bites my arm breaks my right arm and then it starts just [ __ ] mauling me that&#39;s a jellyfish I&#39;m assuming it&#39;s poisonous dead that&#39;s a stupid bee killing it I&#39;m not allergic to bees a squirrel 100% dead I&#39;m murdering that [ __ ] thing Alvin and the Chipmunks that might be a chipmunk that&#39;d be even easier actually I feel like that&#39;d be harder you&#39;d get around me that&#39;s a lemur of sorts what type of monkey is that that&#39;s a baboon are baboons strong they&#39;re less strong than humans who have trained and are in good physical condition you ain&#39;t no chimp pal you ain&#39;t no chimp buddy get in that [ __ ] green bracket buddy I&#39;m killing your dumb ass it&#39;s over they have big teeth I don&#39;t give a [ __ ] it would freak me out they always have like [ __ ] that are like protruding is that a baboon whatever that monkey is whenever they stand up and they have like a pink butt and it looks like their [ __ ] prolapsed it&#39;s disgusting I [ __ ] hate looking at those animals actually I don&#39;t know if that would that would get this video demonetized editor start looking up um pictures of uh the the monkey butt that I&#39;m talking about where it looks like a prolapse anus uh I don&#39;t know uh no don&#39;t throw it on screen no don&#39;t throw it on on screen actually don&#39;t throw it on screen never mind instead show a picture of George Lopez he&#39;s a great guy he&#39;s very very he&#39;s very good to look at and I I always have his uh his uh song stuck in my head leeches dead a platypus platypi aren&#39;t they poisonous aren&#39;t they poisonous I believe they&#39;re poisonous but I think in this I don&#39;t think it&#39;s going to immediately poison me I think I&#39;m still killing Perry I think Perry the Platypus is dead here he&#39;s got like a duck bill and stupid [ __ ] webbed fingers I think I&#39;m going to curb stomp him that&#39;s a black widow spider I I&#39;m still killing it it&#39;s just whether or not I die after so it&#39;s still dead uh a turtle a sea turtle I really don&#39;t think they would put up a fight right I know sea turtles are big but like what the [ __ ] am I going to do I don&#39;t know I don&#39;t know about I&#39;ll put a sea turtle on 75 just cuz I&#39;m fighting it underwater that&#39;s an antelope those are pretty small I think I&#39;m giving myself 75 there actually I&#39;m going to give myself 100 there I know they&#39;re not like weak but they&#39;re smaller than me I&#39;m killing it it&#39;s not big I&#39;ve seen them in real life before they&#39;re not big a snake I&#39;m going to kill it right but I&#39;m going to die after like say it bites me I think that&#39;s a fair I think I&#39;m going to throw it in 20 I think I&#39;m killing it every time I think I have to throw it in 20 though because I&#39;m gonna die if it bites me one time I&#39;m gon I&#39;m gonna die in this scenario right cuz it&#39;s poisonous it bites me I just grab it and now I [ __ ] kill it like I step on I throw it on the ground I step on it I [ __ ] throw a rock at it a mouse GG&#39;s for that cppy bar yo I love cppy baras but those things are 100% of the time dying they are not built for survival [ __ ] that&#39;s just a big hamster goldfish dead what the [ __ ] is that is that man bear pig from South Park I&#39;m [ __ ] GG&#39;s from that I&#39;m losing that 110 times those are barnacles the [ __ ] how am I going to die to a barnacle that is a hamster another that&#39;s a guinea pig that thing&#39;s dead too ladybug I wouldn&#39;t kill it it&#39;s bad luck I&#39;ll let it kill me that&#39;s a boore dead snapping turtle H now we&#39;re into an interesting territory I don&#39;t think I think a snapping turtle am I going to see it do I have to fight it in murky water snapping turtles bite can bite through your bone their bite force is so strong that they could like bite your arm in half if I&#39;m fighting it in murky water it&#39;s definitely going to Gravely injure me it&#39;s just whether or not I pick it up and then [ __ ] hurt it but even if I do pick it up he&#39;s just going to huddle in his [ __ ] thing until I until until I leave and then he&#39;s going to come back out and kill me I&#39;m dead I think 20% of the time I get lucky and maybe I pick him up and then I just start jumping on his shell until I crush his brittle [ __ ] body that&#39;s hiding in that [ __ ] shell of his that&#39;s a tree frog it might be poisonous but I&#39;m killing it that&#39;s a bat dead pig dead a sunbear what the [ __ ] is a sunbear oh sunbears are the bears that look like somebody wearing a mask and they&#39;re like really stupid like somebody hit him in the head with a mallet they&#39;re probably pretty they&#39;re still Bears though right I mean that that I have to take into account it can chop wood with its claws and shatter it with Paw swipes or chew straight through wood okay it is GG&#39;s for the sunbear I am dead just like every other bear a the red panda they&#39;re so tiny and they get jump scared now I got to show a funny video of a red panda and then you&#39;re like little cute panda bear and then he and then he walks up they&#39;re very skittish yeah they they kind of freak out looks like he almost had a [ __ ] heart attack right there had no idea what to do I&#39;m killing it I wouldn&#39;t want to kill it I think I might wait until I starve to death as a means not to kill that animal oh God they can&#39;t do me like this these are the some of the animals that I don&#39;t want to kill red panda dead otter dead wouldn&#39;t want to kill it though Goose oh oh when I tell you put me up against a [ __ ] how about this this is the goose and Swan category if you put me against a stupid [ __ ] Swan I would walk up I would hear him he would walk up to me I would just [ __ ] grab his neck and just [ __ ] toss his dumbass you ever see the videos of when [ __ ] Swan&#39;s try and bother people and like an old man walks up and just grabs it by the neck and throws it he like starts harassing this guy and he&#39;s like big doging him some old ass video look at it he just grabs that [ __ ] look at him stupid ass animal I have no idea how it&#39;s alive yeah I&#39;m killing that thing give me a 10-second fight GG&#39;s what is that is that a a python is that one of those like 10- foot snakes I don&#39;t think I would be able to kill a python or a boa constrictor rather do you think that like Brian Shaw could kill a boa constrictor world&#39;s strongest man also very big Brian Brian Shaw is like seven feet tall and 400 pounds I don&#39;t think I don&#39;t know how how much the boa constrictor has range wise to wrap around him and I think he&#39;s just going to go and just [ __ ] like just open that [ __ ] up I think Brian Shaw could kill B Constructor I don&#39;t think I could I think I&#39;m dead a million times I think it&#39;s going to wrap around me it&#39;s going to just strength death me that&#39;s a mosquito does it have malaria no dead and it wouldn&#39;t kill me that quick blue W that&#39;s not even oh God no wrong one blue whale I mean it wouldn&#39;t want to kill me but it would just run into me swimming and I&#39;d probably die Brute Force that&#39;s a twocan what a random what a random bird to add into this steer list a [ __ ] twocan seahorse yo fun fact do you know that um clown fish can change their sex so in Finding Nemo when uh when the when Nemo&#39;s mom dies the the dad Carl actually would become a woman and become the mother of Nemo seahorses are also the only animal where the male gets pregnant but they can change their uh genitals and they&#39;ll start like producing eggs and [ __ ] so it&#39;s an inaccurate movie Disney maybe get your [ __ ] [ __ ] up okay maybe maybe why don&#39;t you consult some [ __ ] animal marine biologist experts before you decide to make a [ __ ] movie about clownish okay okay Executives dead dead don&#39;t even know what it is it&#39;s cute but it&#39;s dead dolphin I&#39;m dead I&#39;m pretty sure dolphins are like one of if not the smartest animal outside of humans I&#39;m also fighting it in the water it&#39;s over that is a flying squirrel GG&#39;s that&#39;s a [ __ ] praying mantis GG&#39;s what the [ __ ] is that this is a llama I&#39;m killing a llama I think I&#39;m killing a llama 75% of the time I know they&#39;re big but if I&#39;m already killing a camel I&#39;m killing a [ __ ] llama killing a camel 20% I&#39;m killing a llama 75 and Packa doesn&#39;t matter some some animal that spits all right well that&#39;s the that&#39;s the confirmed W tier chat w w tier list I mean you know there&#39;s a lot of animals that I I lose to actually more animals I lose to easily than I than I actually no more animals I beat easily than I lose so I&#39;m going to take that as a win I think it&#39;s uh fairly you know obviously 100% of the time and 0% of the time not as interesting as some of the lucky contenders here I really do think I have a chance to get an against an ostrich a hyena a kangaroo maybe not a hyena do we want to change anything around here you&#39;re losing to a ladybug I said I wouldn&#39;t want to kill a ladybug I&#39;m going to kill the ladybug we&#39;ll move him down the eagle chat chat I&#39;m not dying to I&#39;m going to Google if Eagles have ever killed people while while it did Kill A Child it didn&#39;t kill a full-grown human they&#39;re known to kill big birds like that are known to kill like infants I really don&#39;t think it would kill me chat well that&#39;s the L W [ __ ] W [ __ ] tier list hope you all enjoyed watching that segment [Music] um

Transcript for:Animal Tier List - Likelihood of Winning in a Fight

Transcript for:
Animal Tier List - Likelihood of Winning in a Fight