Key Points from the Lecture

Introduction

• Speaker gets emotional with Troy's story.
• Common question: Toughest negotiation.
• Importance of becoming a trusted advisor.

Core Concepts

• Tactical Empathy: Recognize and demonstrate the other person's perspective.
• Building relationships, rapport, and trust.
• Importance in real estate negotiation: It's about the other person.

Personal Story

• Context: Moving into a new house, gets a pager alert.
• Situation: Man holding a little girl hostage at gunpoint.
• Mindset: Initial anger and frustration.
• Debrief with Sergeant: Realignment of purpose - saving lives.

Hostage Negotiation

• Initial Observations: Hostage and captor physical state, tactical silence.
• Conversations: Man talks about daughter’s heroin addiction, granddaughter's assault.
• Revelation: Man has stage 4 cancer, wants to die with granddaughter.
• Calibrated Questions: How do we fix it?
• Resolution: Negotiator offers to take over responsibility.

Aftermath

• Man surrenders, places granddaughter in negotiator’s care.
• Follow-up: Community and family involvement, man released on judge's orders.
• Closure: Man relieved negotiator of responsibility, expresses gratitude.
• Final Outcome: Captor dies a week later, granddaughter adopted by family.

Lessons Learned

• Importance of understanding and respecting others' values.
• Likability and empathy in negotiations lead to success.
• Real estate parallels: Focus on client's emotions and memories.
• Mindset and respect are critical in successful negotiations.

Final Thoughts

• Treat everyone with respect.
• Show you can be trusted.
• Effort in negotiation pays off.