it's the state of limbo where you're in your head you know what you need to do but you can't bring yourself to do it you've given up on life but there's a part of you that wants to keep trying the action that you take creates the life that you live and you get so caught up in wanting wishing all this kind of stuff that you don't act you have to have a whole scale transformation of your life which is surprisingly easier than people think it is so today we're going to talk about the self-loathing man of inaction in your late 20s or early 30s the only things he does are the things he used to do and he does them less and less has built an entire worldview around his Neurosis I need some time to think constantly re revisits increasingly skewed memories of the past wondering what he should have done instead fixated on things no one actually remembers probably not even to him at this point I can't do anything defe us who can never quite give up this is beautiful right a defe us who can't quite give up only boring people get bored that's me slowly becoming actually the RW so let's call it cognitive decline um it was always going to be like this closest thing to fer new experiences or elaborate fantasies where he reimagines redoing his entire life centered around girls he barely knew in like Middle School family are the only thing that's keeping him alive knows what was what a schis is doesn't know if he is one if I could do it I would have by now no one chooses this yeah I was thinking about doing that know it knows it's not too late but wishes it was it only hurts when I laugh goes months at a time without laughing or sincerely smiling in constant pain either neat or wage slave both equally hopeless it's not like things can get worse um accidentally once felt a moment of relief has been upset about it since and it it's not like things can get better developing healthy problems justify crappy LIF developing health problems but justify a crappy lifestyle why should I do anything cannot accept what he's done nothing does nothing in response he exists in a state of living death thinking the same thoughts over and over day in and day out even as he understands that thinking doesn't help and that he needs to just act instead he is completely overwhelmed by inertia while life passes him by He Is lot everything but can't let go of anything no reason to live no reason to die no reason okay and then haunted by vague Dusty delusions of megalomania the self-loathing man of inaction so I really like this part defeat us who can never quite give up right I think this speaks a lot to the self-loathing man of in action there are a lot of people out there who struggle with this who view themselves as people of inaction for whatever reason it's always framed as a man on the internet and so they they're stuck in their head they can't move on but they can't let go right so you're kind of always like it's the state of limbo where you're in your head you know what you need to do but you can't bring yourself to do it you've given up on life but there's a part of you that wants to keep trying and so it's this weird like balance of like okay I'm hopeless and then one day I have hope but you actually become afraid of Hope because hope means trying and hope means attempting and hope means hoping then if you try and if you attempt and if you hope when those things don't work out that leads to more hurt so you kind of get stuck in this like longing for limbo right a desire for numbness because if you're numb then there's no hope and if you're there's no hope there's no disappointment and if there's no disappointment there's no hurt and at the same time even when you're numb you long to feel things that occasionally there'll be like a ray of sunshine through the clouds where you have a little bit of hope you smile a little bit you feel a little bit of relief but then you're scared because you don't know how to create that consistently and so you view yourself as a person of inaction so we're going to approach this I mean there were two or three ways that I could talk about this my first thought was I would go through and address each of these like sentences and explain the mechanism behind that maybe we can do that but I want to start sort of in a different place so the first thing I'm going to say is that this is not a man of inaction this is a man man of an intense amount of action see this is the first and largest and most catastrophic mistake we make when you look at your life and you think to yourself I never do anything this is categorically wrong the reason your life is the way that it is is because you are doing things all the time may not make sense so let's dive into it and be a little bit more technical so this is one of the biggest things that the theater of karma teaches us right actions have consequences this is a scientific truth there is cause and there is effect this isn't spiritual this is science so the life that you have created around yourself is not a result of inaction it is a result of action so for example if I wake up today and I log onto the computer and I play video games for 8 hours that's not inaction that's action for 8 hours and that will have an effect if I wake up today and I do not apply for a job I will not have a job tomorrow so that every day when I wake up in my life what the truth of the matter is is this life is not a result of inaction and this is why it's so hard to fix because it's not that you've done nothing moving from neutral is not hard right very easy a small amount of acceleration in the positive direction if I am at neutral will result in a positive velocity right if I start walking forward and I was standing still I will start covering ground that's not what happens with the man of inaction positive acceleration results in a negative velocity how is that possible that's because they are moving in the wrong direction so it's not a man of inaction is a man of wrong action when people hear about our coaching program their first response is usually why would I work with another human being when I can watch YouTube videos all on my own working with a coach is about amplifying your time and effort we're great at wanting things and even making some progress but we usually struggle with follow through or have some kind of setback and that's exactly where working with a coach can help coaches provide personalized support to help you set appropriate goals make progress and even work through setbacks just let us know what your goals are what kind of support you're looking for and we'll match you with the best coach for your unique needs check out the link in the description below to see if coaching is right for you so these people are taking actions literally literally literally literally they are taking actions every single day you don't just sit in your bed all day you get out of bed you do particular things those are actions maybe you get high that is an action that has a consequence and maybe you say but Dr hey I do lay in bed all day that too is an action laying is a verb right like technically I'm sitting right now this is an action I am taking your whole life you have no choice but to take actions and so if you look at your life and it is completely Fallen apart this is not a result of inaction this is a result of wrong action and you know this because you look back in your life and you said I should have done this I should have done this I should have done this I should have done this what did you do instead of the things that you should have done you did something else you didn't ask that girl out you didn't apply you didn't uh do the extra credit you decided not to go to school you stayed home so this is one thing that yall have to understand the biggest thing that you have to understand you are always acting there's no such thing as an action arguably there is but very few very few people on the planet truly engage in in action if you guys want to understand that we can talk about it at the end so here's the thing that I want you to understand the life that you live today is a consequence of your actions so it's not that you need to act more it is actually here's the big irony it is that you need to act less what you actually want is inaction and this is why these people are fundamentally stuck because what they try to do is they try to do more and instead what they need to be doing is doing less doing less of the wrong thing will move you in the right direction so most of these people are running in the wrong direction in life the right way to stop you know if you're if you're at minus 100 and you want to avoid getting to minus 200 the first thing that you need to do is learn to sit still just stop moving stop doing the things that you are doing don't even try to do the right thing stopping doing the wrong thing is sufficient and this is what's really weird this is what confuses people see if you want to lose weight you don't need to eat anything you need to stop eating if you want to recover from any addictive substance the solution to addiction is inaction right it's kind of weird so there's one other layer that we have to add on which a lot of people don't really think about which is that we assume that actions are physical so this is the other big thing you have to understand 95 to 99% of the actions that a human being takes are in their mind I'll give you all a really good example of this so there is something called obsessive compulsive disorder OCD in which someone has obsessive thoughts so they will think something that feels really overwhelming like unless I turn on and off the light switch seven times the plane that my family is on will crash and everyone will die this is what we call an obsession an obsession is a thought that is repetitive and usually intrusive and causes distress that is technically what an obsession is then what happens is the compulsion is the action that you take in response to the obsession so when I think these thoughts I will act in some way but when I act in that way it reduces the emotional energy of the thought the only way I can get the thought to disappear is by taking this action so when I flick the light switch on and off and on and off and on and off when I do it seven times then the thoughts are calmed so now I am taking a physical action to reduce a mental action and if we kind of think about it thoughts lead to other thoughts right so this is why I like this principle of karma because in the English language when we use the word action it has an implication of physicality to it but when we say karma karma is an action but the key thing about karma is it's anything that is a cause that has an effect that is a Karma and so if you have a thought does that have an effect absolutely so this is what we do in Psychotherapy if someone has for example a destructive schema a worldview that is negative we can alter their mind so that one thought does not lead to another thought does not lead to another thought each thought you have is an action there's a great lecture over on the membership side that we have about mental karmas which you all should definitely check out there's also something I think in the trauma guide about it as well right so if you all are really interested in understanding and mastering this idea that each of your thoughts isn't of itself an action right because each thought has a consequence in a panic attack what do we what happens in a panic attack I have one thought that leads to another thought that that leads to another thought that leads to another thought that leads to another thought and then these thoughts over time become overwhelming they activate my physiology my I go crazy for a little bit and then my brain short circuits my heart can even short circuit for a little while and then the whole system shuts off and even I want yall to really understand this if you think that your life has fallen apart because you're a self-loathing man of inaction think for a second what are the causes of your current life self-loathing so when you view yourself when you literally have this thought if we can inject these thoughts into any human brain they will have a similar consequence self-loathing is is an action it is a mental action it is a particular kind of thought and those mental actions will lead to physical actions and this kind of makes sense right if I think about taking a sip of water that is what results in taking a sip of water so this is where and if you kind of think about it right if you're one of these people what you find is that you're very drained at the end of the day even though you've done nothing what's draining you if you've done nothing you've done a lot you've done a lot of thinking you've actually done a lot of physical action too and this creates an inertia in the mind it creates all kinds of of effects in your mind and in your life that make it hard for you to act in the right way so it's not that you have inaction it is that you have an overabundance of wrong action right you've created a really problematic life and you've created a very problematic thought process a really good example of this is if I have a thought of suffering if I feel some degree of suffering what do I do I reach for numbness right I feel hopeful and if I feel hopeful this hurts my mind attaches be careful now be be careful here okay when you feel hopeful your mind attaches a fear to hope this is an association when I feel hopeful I have learned to fear hope and since I now fear hope I need to shut off hope and so then I Le reach for a numbing agent take your pck of whatever suppresses the Olympic olymic system video games pornography social media marijuana alcohol whatever take your pick and then we numb ourselves we numb the fear and along with it goes the hope but then we create a huge problem because when we begin to numb ourselves we shut off the part of our brain that motivates physical action one of the most powerful motivators are our emotions but there's two too much negativity right so we have to numb it and that there in lies the problem the more that we numb the negativity the more of the negativity builds up so the first thing that we have to understand is that we are not men of inaction We Are Men of an intense amount of action and if you really stop and think about it what does it take to screw up your life as much as you've screwed it up right and I say this as someone who screwed up my life like it took a lot of effort to screw up my life the way that I screwed it up it took struggle day in and day out the amount of avoidance that I had to engage in was astronomical the amount of like I used to sneak out to my mailbox in the morning to steal my transcript so that my parents would not find it because if they found it there would be consequences and if there were consequences then I would change and if you really look at these self-loathing men of in action they work really really really hard to protect themselves of the consequences of their inaction I'm going to avoid these people for the the holidays I'm not going to show up I'm just going to ghost you work really really hard to avoid the consequences of your life when you shut off your emotions and you shut off the consequences of your life what ends up happening you propagate along the same path right you're removing the things that stimulate what you would call Action make sense so this is not inaction this is an immense amount of action a lot of action very difficult action that's why it's so hard that's why it's so draining and the more that you numb yourself the more that your trash can starts to overflow and then you have to like you know cover it up with all kinds of things now I'm going to fill a whole room of my house with trash I'm going to open the door and I'm going to throw trash in and I'm going to close it up so if you really stop and think about it what you will discover is that you are taking all kinds of mental actions you are running away from things all the time all the time you're running running running running running you're so busy running away from everything that you can't have anything to run towards right so achieving goals building a life worth living is about running towards something not running away from something for the most part and then you end up with this life so what do you do about this the first thing is to do less so in my case I went to India for 3 months and did a whole lot of truly nothing to receive what the world sends your way to start to respond to it don't try to steer the course of your life anymore let the the fruit that you have been cultivating Harvest it see as you start to do less the consequences will start manifesting and you have to absorb all of those consequences it feels like it's too much but it's not too much right all you have to do is actually nothing just let it come in my case you know my parents would call me and I would avoid answering the phone because I didn't want to talk to them answer the phone right see ignoring a phone call is an action ignoring a text message is an action you look at the thing and you literally shut it off and then you turn to something something else you do something to distract your mind okay so if you want to know why people get stuck I want to show you all the paper so this is from a section on recovering from trauma right so if we look at someone who let's say is a self-loathing man of inaction there are all kinds of events in the past that have scarred them these people are essentially traumatized so let's look at how we go about recovering from trauma so here will be eye opening okay identified three factors that are associated with both natural recovery from trauma and reduction of PTSD severity via exposure therapy the first factor is emotional engagement with the trauma memory um in natural recovery emotional engagement refers to fear activation that occurs when one one when one encounters a trauma reminder in the natural environment uh fear activation has been found to be POS positively associated with treatment outcome we hypothesize that a lack of emotional engagement would be associated with poor natural recovery following a traumatic event dissociative symptoms such as feelings of deep realization depersonalization during or following trauma or amnesia for information related to the trauma have been conceptualized strategies that reduce emotional engagement right so when we dissociate we are reducing emotional engagement so reduction of emotional engagement several studies have found that peritraumatic dissociation is associated with more severe PTSD the more you dissociate the worse you get okay now here's what's really interesting consistent with this hypothesis individuals whose Peak symptom severity occurred within two weeks of the traumatic event were less symptomatic 14 weeks later so the more it hurts in the faster it hurts the better off you will be individuals whose symptoms peaked between two and six weeks after the event had more severe symptoms you all understand the more it hurts the better you get and our self-loathing man of inaction is still delaying the emotions from middle school yall see that interesting no so if you want to heal you must stop whatever thoughts come whatever emotions come let them come they're just thoughts they're just emotions they are not truth this is another big problem that self-loathing men of inaction have they believe that their mind is connected to the real world this will happen and this will happen and this will happen this is just a thought it is an emotion it's not reality right and you get so caught up in wanting wishing all this kind of stuff that you don't act there's something that's messed up in the dopaminergic circuitry where wanting normally stimulates action but in these people something interesting has happened so there are a couple of big problems that happen with self-loathing men of in action and one is that they open energic circuitry gets miswired okay and it has to do with this kind of suppression but let's understand this so normally we have this thing called the nucleus succumbent which releases dopamine and then dopamine does a couple of things okay so we got to understand this the first is that it induces Cravings now here's what's really interesting if we look at our dopamine over time when we have a craving we actually get the craving itself increases dop and there are a couple there's one really interesting reason for that so I don't know if youall know this but Parkinson's disease is a disease of movement right so they have things like Cog wheel rigidity they have difficulty walking and the treatment for uh Co Parkinson's disease is something called L Doopa so we give these people dopamine L Doopa crosses the bloodb brain barrier that's why it's l Doopa and it's converted to dopamine and then their ability to move increases so dop me not only triggers Cravings it also triggers movement right so then what happens so now I'm triggering movement and then this will result in action and then dopamine will start and then once I act or my action is completed then I will get a big spike of dopamine right so I want something that initiates a behavioral change and then once I engage in that behavior I'll get a big spike of dopamine now for people like this this is what I've sort of observed as a clinician there is another thing that starts to happen for some reason when I get a craving when I get a wanting of something right and then I want dopamine there's another kind of neurological thing that sort of happens so something about this wanting through associative learning also triggers an emotional response and this is usually a negative emotion so now our limic system gets activated so when so if we go back to our man of learning right so it hurts when I smile things can only get worse a little bit of Hope is a dangerous thing so as this person strives for something right they have a wanting a parallel circuit some kind of Association has been created in the brain where they have a negative emotional response hopeless now your brain looks at this situation and says we are wanting dopamine and we have hopelessness so the brain remember the brain is not working against you it's just trying to do what it knows how to do so it says we want some dopamine and we're feeling hopeless what should we do then we get driven towards inaction but this is not inaction we're going to do something like play Vidya so Vidya is going to suppress our limic system and it is going to give us dopamine you understand you get two for one so I want a girlfriend I want a job the absence of these things is going to trigger shame and now our brain is like okay we need dopamine and we need to shut off our emotional circuitry so we're going to do this and now I've taken an action instead of actually resolving these problems I've taken an action now what started happening is I recruit the endoc canabo circuitry and I'm forming a habit now what my brain has learned so the next time that I want something this becomes a behavioral cue that triggers a neurological response which then triggers an action which then satisfies the issue and so over time these habitual men these men of inaction are habituated right they have a habit of waking up every day and doing the same thing right every day feels the same late 20s early 30s what's the difference 6 years s years it's all the same every day your life is the same because you repeat the same actions over and over and again it's not in action it's lots of action and now you have built up an immense amount of karma because you have been engaging in this habitual Q response dopaminergic emotional suppression you've engaged in this stuff day after day after day after day after day after day after day and remember that your brain when neurons fire frequently they strengthen their connections this is associate of learning and so now your neurons are very well grooved it's like when you have a game Trail right so you have a field of grass and then a Mouse runs across and flattens some grass and then you you have a rabbit that looks at the grass and sees oh there's some flattened grass here let me run across it and then the rabbit goes on that slightly flattened grass flattens it more then you get like a deer that walks down there and then you get a bison that walks down there and then suddenly you have a game Trail and it becomes really really really easy to walk down the game Trail this is what happens in these people so how do you change so we're going to do a couple of things so there are two modes of changing if you want to fix this one is the more classic way right you take small actions go to therapy work on yourself start journaling meditate whatever but honestly with the people that I've worked with there is a degenerate way to transform your life and I would call this going unab Bunga see small changes for people like this are hard because there's such a weight of like habit and all this kind of stuff like you got to go anganga so you got to go like all in on one strategy I'm not saying this is the best way it's just what I've seen and people are talking about monk mode like literally that's what I did right I became I mean I didn't become I tried to become monk but I went through monk training you have to have a whole scale transformation of your life which is surprisingly easier than people think it is so what I would say is you start to become a little bit more aesthetic not a little bit more we're going to go unab banga we're going to put all our points in strength we're going to wield two great clubs no Cosmetics no [ __ ] flask no [ __ ] buff none of this like optimize your life kind of thing and like none of that stuff we're going to go hard and the reason that we need to go hard is because we do not want to trigger those behavioral cues so what I would consider right a couple of things so the first thing about going unab banga is that you need to go see a doctor and you need to make sure that something about your life is not like problematic so I would start with a medical evaluation you may need things like mental health treatment if you've got a mood disorder or things like that going anganga requires no like significant Medical debuffs so I would go get a full physical and get some kind of mental status exam get evaluated for whatever illnesses now this is where we got to be careful because I want yall to pay attention to what your response to that is so when I say go do this thing what a lot of people will do is their mind will have a response I can't do this thing because of this I can't do this thing I can't afford a doctor I can't do this I can't do this it's hard for me blah whatever I'm not saying that any of those things are true this is where we have to like understand something else about the Mind where do thoughts come from so when we have a circuit that gets dopamine and suppresses emotions and has habits and I tell you to do something else these circuits of the brain will then go and create thoughts this is what happens in an addict's brain right so I want yall to understand this the thoughts in your head are not correct or they're not they're not incorrect but the thoughts in your head like where do the I don't know if this makes any sense so I'm going to try Okay so just like bear with me this is [ __ ] weird but like y'all got to think okay where do the thoughts in your head come from people will say oh the thoughts in my head come from truth but think about it for a second I'm talking about the mechanism why does your so there are times in your life where you've had good experiences and you've had bad experiences why do you think about the bad experiences why is it that that's the thing that floats from the unconscious into your conscious mind at a particular moment do you understand that a part of your brain is making that selection a part of your brain is choosing what to open up on your desktop the biggest mistake that we make in life is we assume that the things that our brain produces are because they are true this is factually false you can look at psychological defense mechanisms you can look at cognitive biases and depression you look you can look at trauma you can look at associative learning you can look at all kinds of conditioning it has nothing to do with truth it has to do with which part of your brain is running the show because your brain is trying to motivate a behavior remember there's no inaction there is only action everything you do is an action even sitting still is an action so which part of your brain is running the show that part of your brain will float whatever thoughts are necessary to get you to to create the motivation to move you in the direction that that part of the brain wants to go in and this stupidity of the brain is evolutionary so great example of this is falling in love so when we fall in love there is a part of our brain that goes to the risk assess ment portion there's a part of our brain that calculates risk the part of our brain that falls in love goes and shuts that down so when you start dating someone and you are madly in love and your friends and family are like I kind of see some red flags here you're like I don't see red flags you're wrong and then when you look back on it oh yeah there were red flags I don't know why I didn't see them you didn't see them because that part of your brain was shut off because there was another part of your brain that is running the show so you have a thought but don't for a moment think that your thought correlates with truth and there's a really simple way to understand this a hopeless man of inaction the self-loathing man of in action looks in the future and sees no hope I am blown away by this they're like yeah nothing will ever get better in my life holy [ __ ] this is amazing there like what what do you mean I've never met a human being that can see the future wow you should use your power for good if you can see the future no one can see the future it's just thoughts now those thoughts are there for a reason they will give me justifications they'll say well this happened this happened this happened the past happened this way therefore the future happened this way if it worked like that the stock market would be easy and this is the crazy thing so we take a karmic perspective the past happened that way is not deterministic I mean in a sense it's deterministic but the past happened that way because of what you did your actions created that past you did not ask that person out that is why you hold on to the regret from mid middle school so the future that lays in front of you is not determined by the past it is determined by what you do now if you want a different future take a different action and people will say but I can't well now we're doesn't work where does that thought come from which part of your brain is producing that thought I can't change because here's the thing you guys want to know F if we're talking about a map hack not an app Mac map hack an aim hack the part of your brain that is addicted to video games has one trump card to play it'll convince you that you canot change your life and the moment that your addiction convinces you that you can't change what does it get to do 100% I worked for a couple of years in addiction Psychiatry the most common cognitive pattern that I saw was an addict's brain convincing them that they can't change because the moment it convinces you that you can't change do you just sit on your ass and do nothing no you get high do you see so this is what yall need to understand don't look at the content of your mind look at the direction of your mind look at your mind and ask yourself if my mind says this what does this mean what does this drive drive me toward what direction is it pointing and what you will see if you are a self-loathing man of in action is that all of your thoughts point in One Direction which you think is in action but is not in action because you're not actually sitting on your ass you're sitting on your phone or you are sitting on your ass which is an action it is all of the justifications that allow you to act in an inert Manner and if you pay attention to yourself you'll find there are pulls for you to move out of there the other parts of your brain are screaming at you let's do something else let's do something else and the other parts of your brain they try they try to be angry with you they try selflove they try listening to a Buddhist podcast they try so many things all of these there's 99 people in your brain that are screaming at you to do something else the problem is that only one person has the megaphone and so you continue to create this life every day that you live it because you act and these have consequences so what do you do about this so good news is that even the revelation of this is actually sufficient if you guys want to know what the real answer is the awareness the how can I say this the zealous emphasis on awareness is enough to crack this cycle if you sit and you look at yourself and you look at all these thoughts the more that you st study them these patterns will disappear okay I know a lot of people don't believe that but I really believe that to be true there's one really simple part of reason for this remember that a lot of your actions and thoughts are habitual so the thing about the endoc canabo circuitry The Habit circuitry is the Habit circuitry is not active when you were aware the whole point of Habitual action it is action done without awareness it is put on autopilot you can't be autopilot and be aware at the same time so if there's any autopilot Behavior you have the more you increase awareness literally a a separate part of your brain activates the endoc canabo circuitry is your habit circuitry the awareness circuitry involves your anterior singulate cortex and your anterior singulate cortex is also where willpower comes from awareness and willpower come from activation of the same part of the brain and if you kind of think about it that makes sense right so if I have a habit it requires no willpower and has no awareness the moment that I start exerting willpower you cannot exert willpower without awareness does that make sense too I want youall to stop and think about that for a second anytime you exert willpower you are aware it's like I want to pick this up with my right hand but instead I need to force myself to pick it up with my left hand awareness and willpower not only go hand in hand they are neuroscientifically the same thing staggering yogis have known this for thousands of years you don't need to fix your problems you just need to be aware of them there's a great uh we have a a video all about that too about how willpower and awareness are one and the same thing okay so awareness is sufficient but we're going to talk about unab banga mode so what I would do is first go to a doctor and then your mind will come up with all kinds of problems that's fine it's not that those problems don't exist those are just problems to be solved right so if you say oh I don't have a doctor well like then you should Google search something in your area and sign up well I don't have insurance I can't afford a doctor well then you should Google search how do I get medical care if I have no insurance or I have no money right so each objection that your mind raises is a task to be completed and watch what happens okay I'm going to tell youall what'll happen each thing that happens once your mind once your brain learns that you're doing this it will start to pull out other tools right so it's like you're playing sf6 and you're blocking all the time so your brain is going to use a throw so then suddenly you'll notice something very interesting you feel tired you'll do it tomorrow see the first and watch okay because the your brain in this way is going to be kind of like that the liquid thing in Terminator 2 that changes shapes right it's like the mimic tier where once you you start doing this your brain will adapt it'll say oh my God this guy isn't when I tell him it's not going to work it's not working anymore so now what I'm going to do is I'm going to create energia I'm going to reduce his energy level because it's running the show it's going to places like your reticular activating formation it says make this guy tired and the reticular activating formation says I I sir we are now tired we cannot do this today and it will tell you this look at the Direction look at the Direction you'll feel all kinds of things all sorts of stuff and then that won't work you force yourself to do it and then what will the Mind do the mind will be like oh my God why didn't you do this a long time ago now that we're moving in the right direction you should have done this if only you had done this eight years ago then you wouldn't be here it twists and it turns it changes shape and it always wants you to move in the wrong direction watch it it'll happen this is why you need to be Ste stable steady you will win this is a war that your brain cannot win all it can do is get you to surrender if it fights it will lose 100% of the time all it can do is Trick you into surrendering and it will try time and time and time again so this is enough honestly we'll give you more so once you look at all the different things just notice what happens and the the conception that I would even offer is like think about about it like an external object think about it like a demon that is trying to tempt you away from fixing your life and it will use your brain against you so what you need to do is just notice these things notice as much as you can notice the direction now the reason we say start with a doctor is because there could be certain things that are physiologically not working for you if you have anemia if you have obstructive sleep apnea if you have vitamin D deficiency if you have a thyroid problem there are many common things that will lead to low mood and low energy we have to deal with those things if you have something like a full-fledged mood disorder you may need some kind of pharmacologic treatment Psychotherapy whatever so engage with that that's step number one step number two find yourself some duct tape and duct tape out a square that is maybe anywhere from 6 ft by 6 ft to 8X 10 or whatever create a space that is going to be your temple take a sleeping bag take a pillow lay down there that is where you sleep from now on that is where you exist from now on spend as much as of your time as you can in this 6x6 Square okay we'll talk about leaving the house but in your home look at all of the places you go that result in your quote unquote inaction we're going to stay away from the these places I really like a patch on the floor so I'm going to study there I'm going to sleep there I'm going to do calisthenics there you're going to exist in that space right you're going to leave the place if you need groceries you need to use the bathroom you need a shower you need to go to work like whatever if there's a fire in the building get out but as much of your time as you can you are going to exist in that square and this is where you have to be kind of careful because your mind will want you to get out of the square oh I need to do this I need to do this I need to do this I'm bored here so be it the action that we are going to take is developing a resistance to boredom we're going to tank that boredom damage so in my case what I did was I slept there I exercised there I did yoga there I meditated there so you start to exist I even read there as much as I could I also had a small table without without a chair so I moved out of there and I would do my work there this is also where you got to go hard on the devices so it's time to do it uninstall all of the extraneous things why watch the direction of your mind as it tries to tell you oh we need this for work so I'd say anything that can be done on a computer should not be done on your phone if you absolutely need it on your phone that's one thing remove everything else change your phone to grayscale uninstall all of the extraneous software off of your computer install a an app that blocks whatever websites you waste your time on do all of these things right so these things can be done within 30 minutes that's that's all it takes fixing your Tech is going to be 30 minutes that's it now notice all the Rebellion that will happen in your mind you're worried about cracking and all that kind of crap whatever now we're going anganga 99 points in strength nothing else no Cosmetics no this no don't worry about that next thing that we need to do is fix our diet unab bangas don't eat that trash that you eat they eat anganga food simple food poor people food rice beans vegetables maybe some seasoning if you want it food is no longer a source of pleasure food is sustenance you're eating for survival you are eating you're no longer living to eat you are eating to live so it should be nutritious rice beans veggies fruits ideally nothing processed right so you don't need Twinkies you don't need chips you don't need frozen food I mean if you need it that's a different story frozen veggies you know seasoning is like fine if you want to do some of it but you don't usually need seasoning there's some good micronutrients and stuff in seasoning if you want to use herbs and stuff whatever people are asking about meat ideally less so some meat is okay eggs are okay don't really need cheese milk I guess is okay this is unab banga mode and then it is the tolerance of these things that's it if you have to go to work you go to work people will say but what about goals what about this what about this what about this well that stuff will come you do this for a weekend do it for a week do it I mean if you need to go to work that's a different story if you need to go get groceries go get groceries but when you go to the grocery store it's not about pleasure and what I want youall to do when you enter unab banga mode is just notice your mind and your mind will get desperate it'll use all kinds of techniques to get you to stop it'll Twist and Turn you'll if you are develop your good awareness you will see it panicking and when it starts to Panic you know you're winning you've always been winning you can always win the only time you lose is when you surrender and then people will ask this is another tool the mind will use they'll say for how long until you're done right so this is another technique that the Mind uses to Foster in action it adds the dimension of time I should have done it a long time ago this is never going to work how long do I have to keep this up I can't keep this up forever in all of those things what is the direction abandon your efforts One Direction you look at the direction it's one way right now you don't you want to make sure your diet doesn't have things like nutritional deficiencies and stuff like that so be safe be healthy but this is something that you can do today find your 6x6 Square learn yoga do ASA every day do pranam every day sit and meditate get yourself a set of prayer beads and do home chanting for 108 rounds very simple chant oh 108 times every single day now when you do this kind of stuff this is really important the reason that we go in this drastic way is we want to remove all of our cues so do whatever you can to remove the cues that lead to bad behavior uninstall Discord log out of the extraneous stuff go to a different grocery store very important and then your life will be different you want to transform your life into a temple devoted to you now this word devotion is important see devotion is done towards someone else so all of the actions that you take you are the actor is going to receive zero dopamine zero benefit from it someone else will receive the benefit of it that's what we mean it's almost like fragment yourself into the object of your devotion and if we really think about it the self-loathing man of in action is the other way around every action that is taken is for the benefit of the doer so I'm going to skip school today so that I can stay home and play video games that benefits the me doesn't benefit future me devote yourself to your benefit and recognize that you will never see the benefit of this right the person who is the actor gets nothing this is what gurus were really good at teaching that we've lost we've become so selfish see when we have a society that advocates for me first how is your brain supposed to know which part of me first is good and which part is bad if it's all about me me me me me then video games dopamine pornography drugs whatever that's me my benefit now here now we're all shortterm and all about me so what do we expect there's no sense of community there's no sense of the greater good right and why do we say this well that person over there doesn't give a [ __ ] about the greater good so why should I why should I do something that benefits someone else if it doesn't benefit me if they're not going to do the same there's no reciprocity so I'm not going to do it absolutely that's the nature of the world you're prioritizing yourself you're doing the same thing that they're doing we're all doing the same thing that's why the world is in the shitty state that it's in do something for someone else there are studies that show that people who are depressed who offer support feel better what do we see in our mental health spaces today venting venting venting it's all about my problems my problems my problems I am hurt I am wounded I am a victim I need help just fair enough like it's my job as a medical doctor to help people who need help I get it I think it's good to help help people who need help and also just because you need help doesn't mean that you can't give help I learned this doing Boston street team and working with homeless people the the most giving people on the planet are homeless people crazy you give one homeless dude five bucks instead of buying two things for themselves they'll buy one thing for thems and one thing for their buddy most charitable people on the planet are homeless people so going back to anganga mode you do this for week and then you'll discover something that the action that you take creates the life that you live see we think that our identity determines our actions those people are successful because they are winners and I am unsuccessful because I am a loser our identity Narrows the scope of our the actions that we're allowed to take that's the truth of it so the action that you take determine who you are not the other way around so if you are a self-loathing man of an action that can change today through your action the self-loathing man of inaction became that way because of their actions the self-loathing man does not determine their actions it's the other way around and you propagate it through your actions every single day and this is why like a lot of people you know some people think I'm prideful some people think I am humble I'm neither I think maybe that's prideful to say who knows so I don't know if youall notice what I just did there I'm aware right so I don't know this is a statement from ego not ego I don't know let's just be aware of it maybe that's a statement of utter ego maybe that's the most egotistical I'm neither humble nor egotistical I'm I've transcended so I notice hopefully yall can notice with me and then I just just to be on the safe side I make fun of myself a little bit let's just be aware so I'm neither of those things I'm just me I'm the same guy who failed out of college and I'm the same guy who was faculty at Harvard Medical School got an award of academic achievement when I finished Medical School same kid same guy same human the only difference is the actions that's the only difference so if you're a self-loathing man of inaction take different actions and then you will become something else hey y'all hope you enjoyed today's video we talk about a bunch of topics like this on the channel so be sure to subscribe for more if you're already subscribed GG and we'll see you in chat [Music] m [Music]