You have 30 seconds. The lightning round begins. Stop it. Now, what was Monica's nickname when she was a field hockey goalie? Big Fat Goalie.
Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie. Dangerous Liaisons. Correct. Her actual favorite movie is...
Weekend at Bernie's. Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14? Oh! Ew, no!
Her ear! Alright, Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there? Everyday use, fancy, guest, fancy guest. Two seconds.
Ah, eleven! Eleven, unbelievable. Eleven is correct. Yes!
Alright, that's four for the guys. Ladies, you're up. Alright, come on!
Come on! Oh. 30 seconds on the clock. Five correct questions wins the game.
The lightning round begins now. What is Joey's favorite food? Sandwiches.
Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl's breast? 14?
No, 19. Thanks, man. Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was...
Maurice. Correct. His profession was... Space cowboy. Correct.
What is Chandler Bing's job? Oh gosh, this has something to do with numbers and processing. It carries a briefcase. Ten seconds, you need this or you lose the game.
It has something to do with transponding. Oh, oh, oh, he's a transponster! That's not even a word!
I can get this, I can get this! Oh my god! Yes! Woo!
You totally get embarrassed. No, I don't. Ross, I think I'm just a more secure person than you are.
Is that so? Yeah. Hey, lady, I don't care how much you want it, okay?
I am not going to have sex with you in the bathroom. I'm on my way back to the bathroom. All right, all right, just keep walking, all right?
What are you? I'm sorry sir. I just think he just really likes you Hey, you know that teacher who had a baby with her student? What the- Yes, I'm sorry miss do you have any extra pants? My friend seems to have had a little accident.
I think it's the most beautiful table I've ever seen. I know. So how does this work? You gonna balance the plates on these little guys heads?
Who cares? We'll eat at the sink. Come on, buddy.
Heads up, Bruce. Score! You suck. Okay, Rachel, you're up first. Situation number one.
You're... You're with Monica. The wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go!
I don't want to marry Chandler. Okay, um, it's gonna be okay. One man the rest of my life?
I don't know if I can do it. This means I'll never get to sleep with Joey. Look, Monica, getting cold feet is very common, you know?
It's just because of all the anticipation. And you just have to remember that you love Chandler. And also...
Also, I ran out on a wedding. You don't get to keep the gifts. Very good.
Drawn on your own experience. I like that. Yes, very nice, Rachel. Thank you, judges. Oh, kiss ass.
Okay, Phoebe. Yes, Your Honor. We're now in the ceremony.
Monica is about to say, I do, when her drunk uncle starts yelling. What do you do? Go.
When Monica... I remember when I was a little girl, I remember when I... Ow! Ow!
Very good! Yes, excellent, perfect score. Wait a minute, she just...
...made a scene in the middle of the ceremony. Hey, you want a little taste of Pheebs? How come you guys have never played poker with us?
Yeah, what is that? Like some kind of guy thing? Like some kind of sexist guy thing?
Like it's poker, so only guys can play. No, women are welcome to play. Oh, okay, so then what is it?
Some kind of, you know, like... Like some kind of, you know, like... What is it?
There just don't happen to be any women in our game. Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women. that know how to play poker. Oh, please.
That is such a lame excuse. I mean, it's a typical guy response. Excuse me. Do any of you know how to play? No.
But you could teach us. No. Okay, so now we draw cards.
So I wouldn't need any, right? Because I have a straight. Oh, good for you. Okay, Pheebs, how many do you want?
Okay, I just need two. The ten of spades and the six of clubs. No, Pheebs, you can't do that. Oh, wait, I have the ten of spades.
Here, you want it? No, no. No, see, you can't do that. Oh, no, no, no, that's okay, that's okay. I don't need them.
I'm going for fours. Oh, you're... I'm going for fours.
All right, here we go. We've got salmon, roulettes, and assorted crudités. Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what are you doing?
This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's got to be like chips or dip or pretz.
Okay, so at this point, the dealer... All right, you know what? We got it, we got it. Let's play for real, all right?
High stakes, big bucks. All right, now, you sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks because they didn't look happy.
I have a game! Okay, okay. This is great!
What's the game? What's the game? Um, well, it doesn't have a name. No, okay. Phoebe Ball.
No, it doesn't have a name. Okay, Monica. What is your favorite thing about trees?
They're green? Good, good, five points Alright Alright, Joey Same question Uh... Oh! Hmm, they're tall.
Ooh, three points! Both fine answers, but we were looking for leafy. Leafy. That's not even a game! What?
Shut up! We're winning! You want to finish this right now? Alright, we get a deck of cards. High card wins.
What do you say? Fine, let's do it! Oh, I have cards!
Oh, good. Yeah! Here! Oh, no, these are the trick deck. Okay.
Here, yes. Hmm. Okay.
Okay, you guys, uh, you guys pick first. Okay. Four. That's a low one!
Okay. Alright. Phoebe, you look. I can't do it.
What makes you think I can? Ace! Whoo! Oh!
Why are you screaming and hugging? Well, because we want our apartment back! What?
Ace is high. Jack, queen, king, ace. No, ace is low. Ace, two, three, four.
I don't know. Ooh! Ooh!
Look it! Ah! All right, cut!
Let's pick again. Pick again. All right, give me, give me, give me. Okay. Okay.
Come on, apartment! Come on, apartment! I know Queen is high!
Not as high as... It worked! King!
What did you just say? You roll another hard eight and we get married here tonight. Are you serious?
Yes, I love you. I've never loved anybody as much as I love you. I've never loved anybody as much as I love you.
Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it. What do you say? Okay! Okay, let's go!
Hard eight! Hard eight! Roll. Oh.
Okay, that's a four. And where's the other one? The one under the table.
Nobody move! Can you look that way? I'll look this way.
I'm in! Here it is, here it is. That could be a four or a five.
It's your call. It's a four. I think so too. Everybody loves somebody, somebody.
Everybody falls in love... Hey, come on. Daddy needs a new pair of electromagnetic microscopes for the prehistoric forensics department. Okay, take Pinky Tuscadero up to inspiration point, collect three cool points, yeah!
Which gives me five, and let's see who is gonna lose their clothes. Um, I think I pick our strip poker sponsor. Mr. Joey Tribbiani.
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
All right, relax. It's just a shoe. Oh! Okay, your band is playing at Arnold's.
Collect three cool points, which means I have five, and that means I get Joey's boxers. Fine, gang up on me. I got you all right where I want you.
Come on, take them off. Actually, you know, it's kind of cold, so how about I keep my boxers on and give you all a peek at the good stuff? In what John Huston film would you hear this line? Badges?
We don't need no stinking badges. Treasure of the Sierra Madre. Correct. There's a possible backwards bonus. Madre Sierra, the of treasure.
Yes. I'd like to go up the ladder of chance to the golden mud hut, please. Wise choice. How many rungs? Six.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ah! That noise can only mean one thing.
Hungry monkey! I'd like a wicked wango card. Okay.
It's an audio question. Name this television theme song. Da da ba ba ba da ba ba da Oh! Oh my god! Okay, I know this.
Give me a second. Tell it to Time Turtle! Shut up! I dream of genius! Yes, yes, you're back in the lead.
I'd like to spin the wheel. Ra Oh, come on! Oh, yeah. Uh, uh, super speedy speed round.
Is there a hopping bonus? Of course. Who invented bifocals?
Ben Franklin! Correct. Which monarch has ruled Great Britain the longest? Queen Victoria! Correct again, but you forgot to switch legs between questions, so no hopping bonus!
Oh, every time! Yeah. Now, over to Chandler.
I'd like a Google Card. Are you sure? Yes!
No! Google! Oh my god! Congratulations Ross, because Chandler, you've been bamboozled!
No! This is the best game ever! You know what I just realized?
Joker is poker with a J. Coincidence? Hey, that's Joe incidence with a C. Hey everybody, happy Thanksgiving! Shhh!
No, no, no, no, no, no. What, are we keeping Thanksgiving a secret this year? No, we were playing this game I learned at work. You have to name all the stages.
What? That's, like, insanely easy. No, it's a lot harder than it sounds.
You always forget at least one, or in some cases... 14. It's a stupid game, and I wasn't playing against other people, so technically I didn't lose. What? You forgot 14 states?
Nobody cares about the Dakotas! Oh, okay, time's up. Okay, alright, I got 48. Oh, that's not bad. Phoebe? Oh, I got tired of naming states, so I decided to list the types of celery.
And I have one, regular celery. Okay, so Rachel's got 48, and Phoebe has the lead in... Vegetables, Joey? Say hello to the new champ of Chandler's dumb states game.
Wow, how many you got? Fifty-six. Done with time.
to spare. Ooh, this may be a new world's record. You know, I hate to lecture you guys, but it's kind of disgraceful that a group of well-educated adults and Joey can't name all the states. You ever see a map or one of those round, colorful things called a globe? Hmm?
Uh, Magellan, you got 46 states. What? That's impossible.
46? Well, who's well-ed... Educated now, Mr. I-Forgot-Ten-States.
Okay, Ross, time is up. No, just give me another minute. Look, Ross, if you don't know them by now, you will never know them, okay?
That is the beauty of this game. It makes you want to kill yourself. This is crazy.
I can... I can do this. All right, uh, I bet I can get all 50 before dinner.
Okay, but if you can't, no dinner. You're on. All right, don't look at my list, Ross, because there's a lot on there that you don't have.
How can I not get this? I'm a college professor. I got 1450 on my SATs.
Yes, please. First of all, Utah? Dude, you can't just make stuff up.
I hate America! When I finish this game, I swear I am moving. Okay, maybe this is so hard because there aren't 50 states. Let me tell you something. I have 49 states.
And there are no more! I think I should be able to eat something. It's up to you.
Delaware. Delaware. Delaware.
Alright. I want my turkey now. You got it. You got Nevada twice. I know.
Yeah. Okay, give me a chance to win my money back, okay? Sudden death, one goal, $1,000. You serious?
Oh yes. Okay. Get ready to owe me. Okay. Okay, here we go.
Ready? See, now that's why only the little fake men are supposed to do the kicking. Airport 75. Airport 77. Airport 79. Time's up. Bye-bye birdie. That's a bird.
That's a bird. Okay, okay, it's my turn. Go. Uh, Bean. Bean!
The unbearable likeness of being! Yes! That you get!
That you get! You wanna play rough? We can play rough. Let's get ready to rumble! Ah!
Y'all ready for this? Ah! God, Phoebe, you're on fire!
I know! One more score to go, you can do it! Don't touch me!
Don't touch her! Alright, good luck. Go on.
Go right! Go right! I can!
I can! No! You son of a... Phoebe! Oh, hi, Ben.
Now don't look at the machine!