do you ever just sit back and think 99 of my problems would be sold if I could just stop my overthinking well you're actually right about that because overthinking is literally just the process of creating your own problems majority of the time problems that don't even exist on based on any logic and literally have no possibility to happen and that's no way to live okay it rubs you of your happiness it sabotages your relationships it causes anxiety and it will prevent you from leveling up in life and we all know I am not going to stand for that and that's why this video is all about how you are going to stop overthinking for God I'm going to give you practical ways and methods to ease all of that stress and fight against your overthinking habits the first section of this video is going to cover the meaning the understanding understanding the root causes of overthinking because only then can we learn how to fight against it and the rest of the videos chapters will be talking about the specific root causes so like overthinking in relationships overthinking in regards to your future and your goals overthinking when it comes to making decisions okay I'm covering all bases chapter one so what is overthinking because understanding air and its root causes is the first step to stopping it so let's do a deep dive overthinking is the equivalent of over analyzing people things situations you name it and the way that I Define it is that overthinking is when you are expending a surplus of energy on a thing that is outside of your control because let's get real when do we ever overthink about something we could actually take action to change never instead it's situations like oh my God I wonder how my boyfriend is feeling what if he's actually really upset with me I really think my body language was all off at that meeting and that person seriously probably doesn't like me what if all of this studying is useless and then I end up failing my exam why am I gonna go with my future it's entertaining scenarios that you will never be able to actively change and that lack of control is what sends us into an overthinking spiral and that overthinking seems like the best path of action to take in the moment right wrong because although it might feel natural in stressful situations the correct response is actually to release control challenge your thoughts and Trust in the process but we'll speak about all of that much later in the video overthinking can actually lead to anxiety and depression so why do we do it well this excessive rumination actually tricks our brain into thinking we're doing something beneficial and by thinking about something more we're actually helping to solve this problem and prepare for the worst possible outcome but that's not true and I'm going to prove it to you with our girls Lola and Athena what if I'm not prepared enough for this interview and I don't get the job what if I go in and they don't like me and they turn me away and then I've just wasted so much time preparing the answers to all of these questions just to not even get the job and then I don't even have a backup and I'm probably going to be unemployed forever or what if I do pass tomorrow and then I spend weeks going through each round of the interview just to fail at the very last step and I've wasted all of that time to not even get the job okay I'm so nervous for this interview right now there's a big chance that I might not get this job and I don't even have a backup plan but there's nothing I can do it's out of my hands I prepared the best I can so I can either use this leftover energy to keep preparing for the rest of the day or you know what I'm just going to have a relaxing evening so I feel refreshed and I perform as my best when I'm speaking tomorrow at the interview because I know I've done my best to try and prepare for this and the rest is out of my hands it's up to the universe use see overthinking can't prepare you better it's actually just wasting your time and all of the time that you put into overthinking trying to prepare for the worst case scenario you could have been pouring that energy into actually preparing actually taking the next few logical steps to solve that problem so really overthinking is just another form of self-sabotage you're out here preparing yourself for failure that isn't even meant for you you're out here fantasizing about negative scenarios and ruining your mood in the process you're destroying your confidence by imagining things that haven't even happened and won't happen overthinking is not like Intuition or trusting your gut because that is an energy shift that you get for a reason it's a feeling where you're like okay I don't feel comfortable right now whereas overthinking is just dwelling on something over and over again it's having a worry and then creating an entire storyline behind it and visualizing how everything is going to go wrong for you overthinking is caused by fear trauma perfectionism and a need for certainty but is overthinking really all that bad and are there not some scenarios where it could actually help us and protect us I hate to break it to you but overthinking cannot help you and the benefit you are looking for is just a result of regular thinking regular thinking helps us make better decisions and stay safe and all of that but overthinking is just obsessive unproductive thought which is useless in trying to change your situation or improve your mood so the rest of this video is dedicated to different solutions you can use to put a stop to your overthinking which are based on different causes overcoming overthinking caused by fear of failure anxiety stressing about the future and general worry if you experience this then your thoughts might sound something like I don't think I'll succeed in this task I'm not going to achieve my goals wait what if this never happens for me what will I do where will I end up okay so if I decide to take this risk what is the worst possible thing that could happen to me as a result I really want to start a business but I just can't it's so hard nowadays AKA you suffer from a lack mindset because when you focus on one of the what ifs and what could go wrong in the worst possible outcome you are literally manifesting that failure to happen for you and I get it because I used to be the same I was held back by my self-doubt and fear of failure in so many situations until I changed my mindset so this is how I personally think now to prevent myself from going down that spiral in the first place failure is the root of all success because when you fail at something you learn from it and then that redirects you went to A New Path so that you can succeed at the next thing if I do this thing and it crashes and burns at least I tried if this task doesn't go to plan it's not embarrassing it's not wrong and it doesn't Define me or make me a failure it means I'm being redirected it means that just simply wasn't meant to happen for me and now I'm being guided On A New Path and I am so grateful that I'm no longer going after something which probably was never going to be right for me or make me happy if I'm stressing about something and it doesn't make sense to me that's okay because I have ultimate trust in the timing of my life and the universe that I am being protected at all costs so I will relinquish that need for control and Trust in the process now that's just me but now let me show you a few practical tips to actually overcome this fear of failure anxiety and stress step one journaling and the key here is while you're writing in your Journal you're going to keep asking why until it goes away until you found the real root cause and solution for example I'm really scared that I'm going to fail all of my exams okay why um because I don't feel prepared enough why don't you feel prepared enough because I'm not confident in my knowledge on this subject boom now I can study more or I'm really scared that I made a super bad impression the other day and people don't actually like me why because I keep to myself a lot and I know I don't have confident body language oh so I have an issue with my own self-perception and confidence and if I work on that internally then that will fix the way that I think other people are perceiving me step two create an action plan you can do this online you can draw it on a piece of paper but at the top you're going to write your worry I am worried about X can I do something about it yes no if it's no I have to relinquish control and Trust the process because there's literally no other logical step I can take to proceed from this thought process if it's yes okay what can I do how can I do it where will this take place how will I do it what resources do I need and you kind of go step by step of course you can think this but I think when you're writing it down you're putting it into a diagram it makes it much more easier to understand and it prevents you from actually overthinking this also serves just as a really good distraction and a practical method to overcome creating hypothetical situations step three live in the present because overthinking is caused by focusing too much on the length of the journey and the outcome and what the future is going to look like every single day you need to wake up and think all I have right now is the 24 hours in front of me the future does not exist and the past does not exist and if you want to hear more stuff like that then I highly recommend you read the book called The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle it's insane but the idea with this step is to focus on the next logical step in front of you if you are embarking on a New Journey and you're like but I can't see the way I had and I can't see where this is going or if it's gonna work or if it's gonna put me in my desired place in life all irrelevant does not matter you're focusing on the wrong things instead you need to think but do I know what my next step is AKA what I'm doing right now what I'm doing tomorrow yes okay then all I have to do is pour all of my energy into the next step because the future is irrelevant that's gonna come anyway as I keep taking the next logical step over and over and over again because when you are trying to control where it's going to go and what the end of the journey is going to look like that's what overwhelms you and that's what sends you into the overthinking spiral step four change your mindset two it's just not that serious because the thing is we overthink because we build something up to be this big Grand big deal in our head when that's never the case so instead you need to start looking at everything like it's a trial run or it's an experiment and an example here is I was very nervous when I was setting up my jewelry business to Joanna Studio I had so much self-doubt around it I was like I don't have business experience I'm only 22 years old how can I run a business while also doing all of my content creation and financing everything else in life and then I thought let me just give it a go it doesn't have to be a six figure business it doesn't have to be a success straight away it doesn't have to sell out on the first day let me just try and if it fails and if I don't like it that's okay I'm allowed to walk away from that I'm allowed to shut down the website that is acceptable and if I don't give it a go now then I'll never know and I owe that to myself to just experiment and see what the possibilities are it does not have to be a guaranteed success because nothing in life is so this jewelry business doesn't have to be my full-time career I don't have to be known as the world's best entrepreneur instead it's this is something I'm passionate about and I deserve to pour my energy and attention into this because it's something that I like if it fails then it just wasn't meant to be but at the moment I'm gonna treat this as a hobby not the be all or and all which defines me my success and the trajectory of my my life because that is simply not true and that mindset then takes the pressure off you and it means that you're overthinking no longer has anything to feed off of Step five manifest via visualization and affirmations there are so many ways to manifest that these two methods are the best if you are an overthinker and that's because both of these methods will really focus on helping you shift away from those negative thought patterns so with affirmations the idea is to practice self-praise but the last chapter of this video will give you a list of affirmations to use if you're an overthinker and then with visualization the idea here is to actually visualize every single day every single into plan everything working out all the positive outcomes to the situation because that is the exact opposite of overthinking so like oh I'm really nervous for this day what if this person's like me oh my God my makeup looks horrible but what if everything's good what if we have the best conversation what if the date goes to plan and then we go on a second day and everything turns out fine and I was just worried for no reason or maybe I'll go on a date and it doesn't go to plan and we don't have a second date but guess what I ended up having just a great time and I learned some great lessons that I'll then be taking that wisdom into the next part of my dating life it's a win-win scenario that needs to become your new mindset think of it as a positive overthinking spiral you are repeatedly thinking the same pattern of positive thoughts around every single situation in your life negativity no longer exists I am a lucky girl and everything works in my favor even if that didn't go to plan I got wisdom from it even if that didn't go the way I wanted it's okay it wasn't meant for me and I know the New Path I'm redirection on will take me to the place I truly deserve because I am divinely protected the universe does not work against me I always get what I want whether I know it at the time or not and that right there what I said is an example of an abundance mindset overthinking is centered on lack and what ifs and the worst outcome by doing the opposite of all of these things that's how you finally shift into an abundance mindset so if you find yourself in an overthinking spiral all of the thoughts you have like what if this person doesn't like me what if this doesn't happen this way you're going to take that same sentence whatever you're thinking and you're going to flip it and finally for this chapter step number six keeping active and busy now disclaiming this is a quick fix this should not be your solution to every single time you start overthinking but if you're finding yourself panicking this is the best way to kind of get back on track and take control because overthinking will be at its worst when you're alone and everything's quiet because in that situation you're giving overthinking all of your power to take over everything whereas if you focus on keeping active and busy you want to surround yourself by different stimuli so you're distracted okay you can see different things you can touch different things you can experience things so then you're not focusing all of your attention on what you're thinking and this is where you really need to identify what brings you Joy in your day I personally have an app in my notes app of things that make me feel good because when I'm feeling down and sad I'm not present in recognizing what's good for me so I have to keep a list of it in my phone and I know when I'm sad okay let me read this list oh okay going for coffee makes me feel good going for a walk in a city sunny day makes me feel good watching this particular Comfort movie makes me feel good so when you're overthinking you're going to go to that list you're going to pick one thing boom you're distracted you're releasing serotonin you're feeling good and all of your attention is focused into something else and then you can't get deeper into that overthinking spiral chapter three overcoming overthinking when it comes to making decisions regretting your choices second guessing everything you say and decision paralysis a lot of the times this happens because you just can't make a decision and you're using your overthinking to avoid having to make the decision and if you think this is you then the cause of this decision paralysis is fear of regret you fear you're going to make the wrong choice you feel you're going to end up in the wrong situation so it's just easier to not make the decision in the first place but the thing is that's wrong because you choosing not to decide you're choosing to overthink is also you making that decision and if you don't make the proper decision then life is gonna make kit for you so here are some steps to help you overcome this number one Detachment this is about looking at the bigger picture it's also about following your gut what decision feels good what makes you feel most comfortable the thing that's preventing you from making the decision in the first place is that you're focusing on the outcome again you're fearing that regret Detachment is all about separating yourself from the outcome separating yourself from what might come from it and instead just focusing on how is this making me feel right now two confidence this is all about learning to trust your own decisions your thought processes and your own intelligence knowing what's best for you like I don't care if you haven't achieved your dream life yet you have a lot to be proud of I don't care what anybody else says so you are going to make a list of every single even little small thing you've done for yourself which then adds on to your self-perception and the trust you can have in yourself when making decisions okay you should be able to make your life choices like that because you're smart smart enough to know and you know what this is my favorite fact ever okay when you are putting your trust into the hands of other people when you're like should I do this should I do this you're asking other people for reassurance that is the last thing you should be doing in fact you should be putting the most trust into your own decision making skills because you are the only person on this planet that fully understands you every single person in your life your siblings your childhood best friend your parents your lover you name it they all look at you through a different lens based on their own life experiences their Journey their lessons their trauma their experiences with you everyone looks at you in a different light regardless of how long they've known you therefore you are the only one who will ever actually fully understand you your life Journey you only know your deepest darkest Secrets your everything you've been through therefore you are the only one in this planet that is well informed enough to make decisions for yourself and your life if that doesn't make you trust yourself I don't know what will but if you're like oh I I don't know if I should have said that or you're comparing your choices to somebody else's irrelevant it's irrelevant what anybody else says or does that does not apply to your life whatever you did you did for a reason you were acting off your own life experiences and lessons and that's good that is automatically the correct decision step three change your mindset the lack mindset to abundance mindset that I mentioned previously also applies here but this is also about confronting the emotional problem first because when you're overthinking and you're doubting yourself and your decisions the root of that is an emotional problem a lot of the time it's perfectionism right where you're like I don't know if I should do this because what if I don't get 100 right what if it doesn't turn out in this way and all I gotta say to you is done is better than perfect you are avoiding making that choice because you fear failing or it not being up to a good enough standard you're just doing it in the first place and getting it to completion is good enough perfect is an attainable impossible non-existent standard which is holding you back from your full potential in life so the first step in this is to identify the fear once again this links into constantly asking why whatever your overthinking thought is right now work back from it where is this coming from is it coming from past relationship trauma is it coming from your fear of failure is it coming from letting down your parents once you identify the fair you should be able to come up with the solution to that cause or instead you're now going to use that information to visualize in your head how you're going to deal with it going to imagine this situation going smoothly and working in your favor for example if it's about a piece of work you're going to visualize completing it being so proud of it everything going to plan you literally going to sleep with joy knowing that you did it and you're so happy with the outcome step number four live in the present if you are harsh on yourself and you are judging yourself for past mistakes or feeling embarrassed about what you did last month or last year you need to cut that out because because your past self no matter how imperfect that version of yourself may have been got you to who you are right now you owe everything to them you need to shift your mindset from oh I can't believe that used to be me that's so cringy and embarrassing could never be me now to I am so grateful for that version of myself she or he was only acting on the level of awareness and Consciousness they had at that time and given that they did a great effing job at handling everything they were going through and getting me to where I am in life now they continue to get up every single day to make sure that I am still here in the world doing what I need to do right now step five have faith decision paralysis can also be caused by a fear of uncertainty so the key here is to get comfortable and fall in love with the idea of uncertainty you fear taking the next step because you don't know where it's going to lead to you don't know what's going to happen tomorrow when that comes so you then need to fall in love with uncertainty by thinking but what if something wonderful happens tomorrow what if when this thing is done when that day arrives everything goes better than I could have ever imagined and how wonderful is that that because I'll never know how something is going to end up it could end up more wonderful than I could have ever imagined and lastly for this chapter step six action plan you're not gonna spend an hour overthinking your choices or all of the things you can go wrong you're going to spend that hour making a mind map a diagram a list an Excel spreadsheet whatever you want draw a picture if you have to but you are going to create an action plan of how you're gonna get to your desired result for example your overthinking thought is oh my God I'm moving to this new place and I'm not going to bake any friends or meet people I'm Gonna Be Alone okay action plan what am I gonna do on my first day how am I going to get in the same room as other people how am I going to introduce myself what is my opening line going to be what are some conversation starters I can have saved up in my head to prevent myself to not speaking to other people because I simply don't know what to say what things can I Google or YouTube videos can I watch to help me make friends be more confident and extroverted and put myself out there to avoid having this negative outcome boom done you've now achieved all of that and now you're better prepared for that scary situation rather than sitting in your room and thinking oh my God I'm gonna die alone and never have any friends overthinking when it comes to other people relationships yourself doubt all of that a lot of the time this type of overthinking leads to self-sabotaging when it comes to your experiences and interactions with other people as well as relationships that you truly care about because you're prepping yourself for situations that haven't even happened so step one communicate not only does communication help you overcome your overthinking because when you communicate things and then you come to an agreeable solution and you're like oh okay this didn't end up turning into a horrible situation the next time you're about to go into an overthinking spiral you don't because you know I've been through this before and everything was okay but also it helps you strengthen your relationship and build trust with other people like I understand this because I used to be that person that if I had a fight with my partner in a relationship ship I was like oh my God we're gonna break up or I would doubt their feelings towards me and I just go down this hole and if your thought process is no if I communicate this what if they get angry upset what if I get upset what it turns into an argument that is also another form of overthinking you have to give it a shot just to see where it goes and if it does end up into an argument you need to know that because if your partner cannot sit down and communicate with you you need to dump them ASAP step two use fear as your guide the key here isn't to entertain your overthinking instead use that time that you could have been overthinking to make a pros and cons list way up if this situation or that person is even worth it in the first place and there's links into the quote if it's not gonna matter in five years don't spend more than five minutes stressing about it write down the pros and cons of this situation this relationship that person and determine its value in your life and how important it is and engage in that regular thinking and action plan rather than running away with your overthinking thoughts and letting it make you anxious three living in the present again if you want interesting about a past person you're missing someone I hate to break it to you but none of that is real and I need you to remember this how much longer are you going to waste your present moment and your limited time on this planet dwelling about things that have already happened dwelling about a past you cannot change or control and once again I understand I was that person who went through a really bad breakup and for eight months after I was still thinking about my ex and so in that moment I thought what opportunities can I grasp today to make me feel better right now to bring some serotonin back into my life right now and not run away with this sadness and let it dictate my mood for the entire day for example can I call it my friends right now and go see them I'ma go do that can I read a really good book for the rest of the day and be distracted with that I'm gonna go do that step four practice self-validation this will heighten your confidence so that you can fight all of those negative overthinking Thoughts with new positive affirming ones and I have an entire video dedicated on my YouTube channel on how to achieve this step number five detach from situations and people because in the process of you spending your time and energy constantly worrying and fantasizing about another person you are letting your own life run away from you and in this case please go watch my video how to detach on my channel it's very popular it covers all of the bases and it will allow you to master Detachment and no longer fantasize or obsess about other people but instead yourself because the only thing that you can ever control is yourself and your life and of course we're going to finish off this video with some affirmations that you can start using today to help reassure yourself calm yourself down and not dive into that negative overthinking spiral let's go my thoughts do not reflect my reality I do not identify with my thoughts they do not represent who I am or what my experience is I am in control of my thoughts I have the power and discipline to choose what I focus my attention on I am safe and nothing bad will happen to me everything works within my best interest I do not have to worry about anything the universe has my back instead of stressing I am going to trust in Divine timing and trust that everything I want is already on its way to me I am enough I only exist and focus on the present moment I am above all of my negative thoughts and I am abundantly filled with positivity and finally my favorite I am at peace with all that has happened and all that will happen and that brings us to the end of this video apologies for the kind of weird changing lighting but I'm just highly glad that the sun is out I hope you guys enjoyed this video I hope you learned something new if you did make sure to give it a thumbs up and subscribe because I make new videos every single week and I want to help you become your best self so I appreciate you for being here thank you so much for watching and I will see you guys in the next one bye [Music]