10 Skills to Help Face Your Fears and Beat Them

Neuroplasticity and Anxiety

• Brain constantly rewires itself — called neuroplasticity.
• Better imaging technologies show brain changes based on usage.
• Video aims to teach 10 skills to manage anxiety.

Skill 1: Choose Something that Matters More

• Identify why you want to overcome anxiety (e.g., spend time with loved ones, pursue goals).
• Write down these reasons.
• Quote: "He who has a why can endure any how." — Nietzsche

Skill 2: Practice Willingness

• Understand that anxiety is uncomfortable but not dangerous.
• Change mindset from "I can’t handle this" to "It's okay to feel anxious."
• Physical acceptance: Breathe into sensations, making space for them.
• Use mindfulness and meditation (apps like Headspace).
• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (book: "Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life")

Skill 3: Build Emotional Muscles

• Like physical muscles, the more you face fears, the easier it becomes.
• Builds stronger neural pathways that allow you to do hard things.

Skill 4: Let Go of Perfectionism

• Replace need for perfection with a growth mindset.
• Actively practice sharing mistakes (e.g., at dinner, social media).

Skill 5: Let Go of the Belief "I Can't Handle It"

• Linked to perfectionism.
• Replace with "I can do hard things."
• Develop this skill through gradually practicing hard tasks.

Skill 6: Change How You Perceive Situations

• Intervening at the thought level to change perceptions (e.g., “most dogs are safe” instead of “this dog could kill me”).
• Research cognitive distortions for more info (catastrophizing, etc.).

Skill 7: Do One Small Step Every Day

• Write fears and break them into smaller steps (exposure hierarchy).
• Gradually face larger fears by starting small.
• Document progress and goals.

Skill 8: Stay with Your Fears

• Stay with fears until anxiety reduces or for a set amount of time.
• Avoid the rule “I’ll leave if I get too anxious.”
• Rate anxiety levels and stay until it decreases by half (or set a fixed duration).

Skill 9: Get Support

• Seek help to face fears (e.g., friend, therapist).
• Use support to build ability to handle fears alone.

Skill 10: Be Compassionate with Yourself

• Recognize and celebrate achievements, no matter how small.
• Practice patience and self-love.
• Self-compassion as a skill that can be developed.

Final Thoughts

• Anxiety will never fully disappear, nor should it.
• Aim to reduce “dirty” anxiety caused by distorted thinking.
• Courage is acting in the presence of fear.
• Recommended course: "Rewiring the Anxious Brain" on Udemy.