Transcript for:
Moist Cr1TiKaL's Controversial Address

Heavens to Betsy what a week huh sports fans holy Toledo yeah so moist criticals in a big oopsy Poopsy situation here it reminds me of the time in moonfall when KC Houseman sacrifices himself and dies of cringe to become the moon yeah so uh being serious now since this has become such a big issue I've been in a lot of drama recently I'm in hot water and I'm biting on the fart bubbles that pop up in the bathtub here it is a lot so let's start with the most recent one today my retirement I didn't know I was retiring that's news to me I'm as shocked as all of you are I had a ton of fun last night playing a game called clicking which is basically like a cuckle Dre simulator but for clicking against like The Lorax and a hotel room and I just did like an old school gameplay commentary video I was bubbly full of Jubilation I posted it today only to learn that I'm just a big old [ __ ] liar liar liar plants for hire I suppose I apparently I didn't know this until I posted the video everyone was under the impression that I was quitting the internet so I started scratching at the hair on my chinny chin chin wondering when the [ __ ] did that happen was I sleepwalking do I have Som nalism is this some kind of like you know Fight Club situation but instead of like Tyler Duran I have [ __ ] Charles Turin here that's just making wrong announcements it turns out the patient zero behind all of this was a post Jackson made announcing that I would be leaving the podcasts which is something I thought about periodically for quite quite a few months now mainly because I started to recognize that I was becoming the very thing I'd make fun of with being chronically online like I just was always online and the podcasts were a big proponent of that and I just kind of wanted to scale back the amount of time I spend online so and I kept Jackson in the loop the whole time here about where my head was at and last week I told him hey man I think this is going to be where I I hang up the Jersey you can put it in the rafters throw it in the dumpster but I think I'm just going to be you know sailing off into the sunset here and just reducing the amount of stuff I do online which he completely understood so he made the announcement just letting people know that and then that got spun on Twitter and Reddit as moist criticals taking an indefinite Hiatus and quitting the internet fundamentally don't know when I'll be back he's done with the internet because of all this controversy pouille on his grave he's gone when I I mean I looking at the post I don't even know where that's coming from it's it's literally just talking about the podcast and me just stepping away like it's not it doesn't extend beyond that I can't even wrap my tiny Noodle around how anyone could perceive this as me being done with the internet entirely but that's the story that they ran with and that's what most people saw not the actual post so everyone thought I was quitting the internet so I posted that video that I was really happy with cuz it just felt like an OG old school video that made me happy and then bang just a flood of comments and dislikes all saying [ __ ] like how could you [ __ ] deceive us I thought you quit huh what happened to leaving huh I just read this post on Twitter from an account that had a profile pick of titties photoshopped onto Thomas Edison that said you were done and it had 50,000 likes so I know it was true and you're just a [ __ ] liar I can't even just peacefully walk away from some projects without it being a massive [ __ ] reaction over actual nothing Burger information and trust me no one has a pallette more refined for nothing Burgers than me I have ranted about the stupidest [ __ ] of all time but this was mind-boggling even for me so to set the record straight no I'm not retiring despite what the experts are telling you all I did was walk away from a couple of projects uh like that's really it like that's a pretty normal thing to do especially when one of them I've been doing for like 8 years I really didn't think it was that deep especially not deep enough for how big of a story it's become with all of the wild narratives running around about the true reason that I stopped doing it so let's get into that drama I've talked about it on stream I don't even know how many times at this point but we'll just talk about all of it in this video here so when covering the Ava Tyson situation I was attacked by a lot of people for not being quick enough even though I covered it within like the first 6 hours people were unsatisfied that I hadn't made a video within like the first [ __ ] 20 minutes of it dropping and then when I did finally finish the full video covering all of it it was another massive problem where now I only did it out of an obligation cuz people called me out and then I also got accused of being a transfer phobe because I didn't use Ava Tyson's preferred pronouns which were she her I didn't know that I thought just calling Ava Tyson by her name was okay and I had also heard when I went to the Mr Beast thing someone refer to Ava Tyson with they so I was truly under the impression that that was okay and for that I was annihilated by a good chunk of Twitter and then annihilated by another good chunk of Twitter because I called that sneo who was the main proponent about me covering for Mr Beast to keep the collab alive I wasn't talking about AA tison because I wanted the Mr Beast collab and I talked about how absurd that statement was especially given his history with fighting against the age of consent he's been very vocal about how much he hates the age of consent and so I talked about that briefly at the end of the video which then changed the whole narrative for a lot of people where I never talked about AA Tyson and only talked about sneo so it was a complete lose lose cuz if I didn't talk about what sneo was saying I would have been called a coward for not addressing it and talking about like well he was going to cover for Mr Beast until sneo called him out so like if I didn't do it I would have been attacked I did do it still got attacked it really was unwinable but from that spawned a conversation where I talked to sneo directly CU he was very upset that I was talking about how him rallying against the age of consent is pedophile arguments like defending pedophilia as I've said since the very beginning of this channel I'm always willing to engage with people I disagree with and I thought that maybe there was a chance I misunderstood what he was trying to say even though it's still abhorent I thought okay maybe he's not actually trying to defend pedophilia he's like some kind of pseudo intellectual debate bro who's trying to say something else so I was willing to hear him out on it and I talked to him in DMS and he said he doesn't believe in the age of consent he believes in the age of marriage can't assign a number to it but said that when someone can legally drive they should be able to marry at the same time which which is literally like a 15 or 16-year-old cuz you get your permit at 15 your license at 16 and both are way too young to be marrying that [ __ ] is completely unacceptable it is downright disgusting he then said that he was happy to discuss it in a call which I said I was willing to hear him out on and he said that he would do it later cuz he was outside doing an IRL stream in Turkey so I was willing to hear him out because again if this is some kind of crazy misunderstanding I'd like to know that because it'd be really [ __ ] scary for someone in his position with his level of INF uence to be actually advocating for adults marrying and [ __ ] children that's a huge problem that's a big [ __ ] problem so if there was something that he was like trying to say but failing to do so I was willing to at least hear it and this is where the infamous debate came from the debate that people are calling the debate of the century I'm kidding not a single soul on the planet said that it's actually one of the most [ __ ] debates I think human beings have ever had he eventually called me on Discord I was under the impression this was just him and I talking I had no idea this was going to be a debate I thought he was going to try and explain himself like hey no this isn't actually what I meant this is what I'm trying to say I thought this was a conversation between him and I not this kind of debate show that he was putting on for his audience there is nothing in our DMS that indicated that's where it was going when I joined the call he asked if I was going to record it to which I said I can if he wants me to but I was also down to just talk so I thought maybe he wanted it as a recording to like explain to people like no he's not actually a pedophile defender or advocating for that kind of thing so I thought that is why he asked I didn't know it was because it was being streamed especially because one of his last DMS was about how he's doing an outside IRL stream and he would call me after to me that says when he's done streaming that's when we'll talk not as a part of his stream I didn't know this was a debate nor a stream until about an hour and 40 into it roughly somewhere in that ballpark I am not a debater I've never claimed to be one I never want to be a debater I've always said that I believe conversations are the most productive because debates always devolve into what side can score the most points by explaining their thought process even if the position is wrong whereas a conversation is a very different thing to me so I didn't even know that's what this was so obviously I was unprepared for a [ __ ] debate So I entered into the Thunderdome and we started talking I made it clear that I found his statements on the age of consent and children marrying adults being [ __ ] hideous absolutely revolting and then he started arguing about well what is a child we must Define a child you know it's not actually being under 18 it's that's all a bunch of hoie and I really think if you have to start arguing about well what technically is a child you're already way too far gone like that is so [ __ ] weird and in no uncertain term Ms multiple times throughout the debate sneo says that he is okay with people that are aged 12 13 14 15 16 marrying adults that are 18 or older aming globally let's just talk globally like do you think it is okay for I'm not talking about just you specifically anymore anyone do you think it's okay for anyone in their 20s an adult to marry a 15 or 16year old a 21-year-old if if there was a a marriage where the father consented and the daughter consented and it was both good on both families and they wanted to do it why am I going to get involved why should we get the government involved even get back a little bit do you think there's not a problem with a child being with an adult okay we haven't even agreed upon what the what a child and an adult is you keep saying you keep saying that it's 18 under 18 child and I'm telling you that's not even the definition of the word what is the number need to be a number or else you can do the same thing I just told you there's not a number do you but do you see why that's a problem no if there's no defined so why why can't a 12-year-old Mary an 18-year-old because most 12-year-olds haven't gone through puberty yet and most 12-year-olds what as you just said it changes what if a 12-year-old went through puberty early the parents consent the 18-year-old in the parents consent can they do it most likely that's not going to happen you know why cuz islamically if if we're not talking most likely just say it if the families have consented the kid is mature the kid is ready why should I stop it at 12 years old at 12 years old if the kid is is the kid is physically mature the parents consent both parties are happy 12-year-old being physically mature if it's that's the only that's the only line that actually makes sense again I don't think a 14-year-old can ever be physically mature mhm even though uh even though they literally can even even though even though puberty actually defines that it's fine um I don't nope I don't I don't believe so I was 14 once what I I actually had a mustache when I was 14 would you have looked at me and said I was physically mature enough to get married if you were if you were physically mature if you were mature yes I would okay really if if 14 yeah if you were 14 and you were ready to go and you met another 14-year-old yes I would no no no no no we're talking adults you keep going back that is adult physic I I I told you my definition not I told you the definition the definition if you were went through puberty you're an adult that's the definition of adult so yes if you're an adult and you had a mustache you're ready to get married fine okay un ironically saying a 14-year-old adult I think would make most sensible people want to puke there's so many instances of this and a lot of the conversation was spent with him talking about like overseas age of consent like talking about how Japan's age of consent was 13 for the longest time this and that but the whole thing was like pulling teeth and it was [ __ ] painful and I think it's extremely alarming perspective to have unironically calling a 14-year-old and 12-year-old mature enough for a marriage those are middle schoolers like holy [ __ ] I think that is extremely concerning to be advocating for something like that like would sneo be okay if his best friend ended up marrying a 14-year-old he certainly shouldn't be no one should be okay with something like that like that's [ __ ] terrible that is actually terrible but now since I wasn't like holding him to this topic or making sure it stayed on the topic I thought we were talking about it went all over the place with a ton of different things but the big one and this is what most people have focused on which was my response to his question about kids transitioning and the way he would pose that question would be by asking if I thought it was okay if kids who want to switch their gender go to the doctor and get their dick cut off is it okay if a 9-year-old goes to a doctor and gets their [ __ ] cut off right then and there and when posed with that question I replied with yes and I've talked about this on stream many many times now and I'll talk about it again here I thought he was talking in hyperboy I thought he was just exaggerating being over the toop talking about the entire subject of transitioning I had no idea that any living breathing human being actually thought that that's how transitioning Works where you just go into a doctor saying I feel like switching genders and they lay you down on the operating table and just snip your whole [ __ ] meat off I didn't know that that's what he actually believed I I didn't know he was speaking literally I thought he was just referring to the entire process of transitioning and just using this over-the-top statement to encapsulate all of it because you literally cannot get that surgery unless you are 18 like you actually have to go out of your way to be that stupid on the topic than you would just spinning a couple of seconds looking it up there are very rare cases where someone under 18 has had that surgery performed that's not common so I really didn't think that someone could be so dumb on the topic I thought he was just speaking in hyperbole which is my mistake I should have been more clear instead of making an assumption that he was talking about something nuanced in an over-the-top way I haven't hid this take and it's not a new take from me I've talked about this a couple times throughout the years on stream I have no complaints if a kid gets interested in transitioning and starts talking to their family about it so their parents start talking to doctors the kid starts talking to doctors and therapists and all of this because the process of transitioning is one that takes place over the course of many years it's not something that just happens like that and I'm also not afraid to admit that I am not the most educated when it comes to transitioning I am not someone that has a ton of knowledge about the subject to be speaking on it in a really in-depth manner but even I know these very surface level things that everyone has easy access to to understand it is a long process and I have no problems at all if a kid gets interested in that process and starts going through that process with proper care and then when they reach the age where they can consider that surgery and decide they want to do it then that's all power to them that's entirely up to them they have reached that age they can now do that surgery if they want to that is not a surgery that's being offered to like a 9-year-old who just says I feel like changing genders today it's just not how it works and I didn't think that that's what was actually being discussed because it's so [ __ ] silly now I'm sure there's some really Fringe cases you can point to where that kind of thing did happen but it's not common thus I didn't think that's what was being referred to in the conversation and it is again my mistake for not recognizing that at that moment it was being spoken about literally so all that [ __ ] that people keep dogpiling and spouting about me about how I want all kids to go out there and get their genitals chopped off is just [ __ ] up it's so it's so ridiculous I recognize I did a horrible job of arguing in this debate which isn't surprising considering I don't debate this is not something that's in my skill set which of course led to some embarrassingly dog [ __ ] argument like the one I've seen people reference a couple times is when I briefly mention Sports in this topic it was a stupid point to try and make I was getting hit by like some rebound psychic damage listening to some of the driil brain rot that sneo was spouting about the age of consent and I don't know why I thought this was like an argument to try and make but I brought up Sports in this subject and I was going to try and elaborate on it but didn't at all what I was going to try and say is that when a kid gets interested in a sport they'll talk to their parents about it they'll research the sport you know go through the process of learning about it and when it comes to transitioning it's still a process where you talk to your family about it you learn about it like it was a like it wasn't a point where I was trying to say well changing genders is a lot like picking between baseball and soccer like it's not what I was trying to get at but because I didn't elaborate on it and it really wasn't a good argument to try and make in the first place that's one people have harped on a lot and I get it like I said I am not a debater like I didn't go in here expecting a debate so I had nothing prepared here for this inundation of outrageous questions and tangents like there was a point where sneo was trying to get me to say white power like the whole thing was a [ __ ] mess it was without a doubt probably the worst debate that video has ever been cursed with and I really regret not doing a better job here it's not something I should have even done in the first place I just have a tendency to really hope for the best out of people and I was really hoping that I and most people were wrong about sneo perspective on the age of consent however unfortunately it doesn't appear to be the case he was very adamant about this position and I did a terrible job in arguing with him and I did a terrible job of articulating my beliefs I am supportive of the lgbtq plus and I have been and that's not something I've been shy about I just wish I did a better job of expressing that to be open and honest here and I've talked about this a lot I've always treated my channel kind of like a diary for myself which is why I just talk about so much different nonsense and so many things that I know a lot of people don't give a [ __ ] about but some of it's fun for me to talk about or some of it's just things I care about so being totally honest I used to treat the internet as an escape from my dog [ __ ] real life truly unhappy really hated most of everything about myself and the internet was my escape from it but now it's really become that real life is the escapism for me now like I love posting and creating things but I don't like interacting with the internet around me anymore and it's something that I started to realize a couple months ago and I've talked about it on stream a little bit how because I've covered so many like drama stories and everything it's pretty much all that I ever get told about when I'm streaming and it's become such a massive headache and it's just constant negativity that I'm fully flooded with like at all hours like I am in like this Human Centipede of eating someone's ass while having my ass eaten with even more things that I'm being demanded to like talk about where everything just feels like a lose lose and it has been for like the last 6 or eight months I feel where if I talk about something it's a problem even if something is cut and dry as like Cody Co having sex with a 17-year-old being bad I caught a lot of [ __ ] for that too I'm sure a lot of people probably didn't see that but man the amount of emails I got and a lot of the things I was seeing even something as cut and dry as that was an issue when I talked about it and then if I don't talk about something or if I don't talk about something fast enough in the time that some people think is appropriate I'm then accused of covering up for something for an ulterior evil motive so it just really feels like a rock in a hard place where regardless it's just going to be a massive flood of negativity and a huge critique of me that I've always seen is Charlie's a fence sitter he's just a [ __ ] fence sitting enlightened Centrist cuck this and that and I've always said for the entire time I've been on the internet I'm not special I'm literally just a normal guy who got very lucky I just sit here joke about [ __ ] talk about my opinion on things and nothing else I don't have a unique perspective on things I don't have deep insight into the vicissitudes of certain things I am literally just a guy who yaps has some fun talks about [ __ ] does some wacky stuff as well and that's it it's just not that deep but because everything is so inflammatory and charged online it's being perceived in the last I'd say like the last two years it's really popped off as me making deliberate attempts to appease both sides and play right down the middle to soak up as much as possible like it's it's all this like nefarious scheme where I'm doing this with my hands and I just don't understand how it's become so inccary where that's apparently like a really bad thing now my opinion is not special in my opinion isn't one that's pandering to any sides or catering to anything it's literally just whatever's up here I sit down for like 30 to 45 minutes on like a topic or like a video that I'm joking around about and I talk about it I am legitimately just an average well below average height guy who's about to turn 30 I'm not just spitting hot takes out the Wazoo here I'm just being myself that's all this channel ever has been and now it's become super controversial to do that if it's not like you know picking sides on everything it seems and it's very frustrating for the longest time it was just me having fun and for the most part it still is but I've started to recognize over the last few months that some of the things I do just really aren't fun for me to do and I've been doing them out of obligation mainly internet drama when I initially started covering drama so many years ago now it was fun cuz it wasn't as serious like the stories were a lot you know more quirky it was easy to get invested cuz it was kind of just like a soap opera like a really dumb soap opera but recently it's been much more serious and I feel the need to talk about these things because a lot of them are extremely serious with very important topics to discuss but it has become draining as much as I never wanted to admit it I've started to recognize that my mood is immediately impacted by whatever I read on Twitter in the morning if that's some horrible stuff about a Creator or what have you it immediately affects my entire day and my whole outlook on the day now I know W call the wambulance get some French cry is just [ __ ] whining about having to talk about drama what a what a stupid problem to be upset about but I'm just trying to explain that it hasn't been as fun recently it hasn't and the main thing if you've been around the channel for a while is I've always wanted this to be fun and never feel like a job and as hard as it is for me to admit this a lot of this kind of stuff it has just started to feel like less fun and more of well got to do this cuz I'm expected to like anytime I go live most of chat is just telling me about the latest in whatever's happening in the Creator space or some other like extremely negative thing going on and it's like okay well I'm going to have to learn all about that once I turn stream off so then I spend a few hours learning about these things and it's all just really upsetting stuff like it's not happy it's all very sad bad stuff and it's been making me not happy so I definitely think I'll be slowing down on covering internet related drama or like drama in general I'll still talk about like really wacky stories and [ __ ] like that but I I definitely think I'm going be pumping the breaks on like the kind of drama I have been covering recently and instead I'm going to go back to focusing on the content that I'm most happy with like if you ask me what content I'm most proud of throughout my entire time on this platform for the last like 17 18 years none of it would be drama coverage it'd be things like skynut it'd be things like shooting a potato at a tennis racket to see if you can make french fries in midair by frying them in hot oil it's it's [ __ ] like that and I think I'm going to go back to that kind of stuff as opposed to the direction that I have been going recently so yeah this was a lot to go over here but I hope this has cleared everything up and uh yeah that's really about it see you