do you find yourself absolutely confused on what men really want are you frustrated after years of trying your hardest to get men to finally chase after you only to have him pay all of his attention on some other girl who isn't even paying him any mind on today's show we'll discuss five real things you can actually do that will have the men going crazy for you and for once have them chasing after you like a hungry hyena very first one I want you to ignore him like dead Sears I know you're going to say ignore him okay this sounds like really toxic information are you trying to teach us to be tox just wait a second I'll explain what I mean because you can do two things at once you can ignore him while also not being a toxic person I'm referring to ignoring his calls his texts his uh DMS he sending you uh Tik Tok uh videos he sending you Instagram rails him sending you Snapchat cats no no no no you ignore all of that why because none of that benefits you men are going to be the most attracted to the girls who are not speaking to them what I mean by that is the more you are speaking to the man the less attractive you become because the more attainable you become and I know you finally want to be the one getting treated like the dream girl but the reality of it is the dream girl is a dream girl because there she's unattainable because we love as men doing all the work of trying to convince her to want to be with us want to speak to us want to be around us want to be our girl and while guys might say I don't I don't like girls that play hard to get that's uh that's stupid that's uh that's toxic I don't have time for that I want you to just tell me exactly how you feel and just blurt it all out and just lay it right on there on the table see see see that's the trick when they don't want to have to do the deciphering because they know it can be a very addictive process trying to figure out does she like me does she want me how does you feel about me right and men don't want to fall into that trap with you they actually want you to make it easy for him and easy for him to not be so attached and invested in you and if you lay all your cards out on the table tell him exactly how you feel it will make it very easy for him to not be confused and not have to uh feel so invested in you and trying to figure you out but the thing about it is even though he might say he wants that the sad part for you is you become the most uninteresting girl to him and then he ends up chasing after the girl who embodies everything that he told you he didn't want you're going to squeeze the life out of any form of communication he has with you that is not taking you out on a date and seeing you in real life why because that is the hardest thing to do okay for the guys and because it requires in being intentional it requires scheduling it's going to be very painful for him but the process of it being very painful for him is what's going to make him go crazy for you notice that this is titled how to make him go crazy for you not how to ease his anxiety and make him feel really good and never think about you and just call you like super chill and super fun now that we've established that you're going to ignore him number one I want to hop right into number two because it perfectly coincides with number one that's going to give give him a lot of anxiety but here's the thing that's good here's the thing when you really like a guy and when you're really interested in a guy you're going to be naturally invested in the success of that relationship there's nothing wrong with that however in the process of you being invested in a guy and wanting this relationship to work what's going to happen is the times in which he feels some anxiety towards you or the relationship maybe he feels like you don't like him or you're uninterested in him or maybe you're just too busy for him when he voic is that and you're also invested in him what's going to happen is you're going to really want to jump out and be like no but I really like you no but I'm really interested in you no but I want you so badly no but I oh is it that you think I'm not texting you because I don't like you no I'm going to text you now a million times so that you know how much I do like you right and you actually kind of become a little bit anxious that him expressing his anxiety is a communication that if you don't change or fix that thing then he'll become uninterested in you what he he's actually describing to you is the discomfort that he feels of being increasingly emotionally invested in you to the point where now he can't stop thinking about you now he can't like actually turn his brain off as it relates to the relationship and you and what you want all he's thinking about is your needs what you want what he's doing right and he just keeps replaying you over and over in his mind that becomes agitating and frustrating to the men so they express to you that anxiety hoping that you will ease that anxiety that's where the mistake comes in a man will never be able to go crazy for you if you're constantly easing his anxiety I know it sounds super toxic I know it sounds super wrong but I need you to understand the process of really loving someone being obsessed with them going crazy for them is going to consist of some of what we can describe as a negative emotions as well and it's okay for him to have a little bit of or a lot of bit of anxiety as it relates to you all that means is his investment emotionally in you is continuing to increase and that's a good thing because when his investment in you emotionally is very low I guarantee you he won't be acting right he won't be treating you the right way he won't be treating you with respect he won't be talking to you uh with respect and his mind and his focus and energy will be on every other thing except for you but I guarantee you when his anxiety is high as it relates to you in the relationship and whether you want him and want to be with him you'll get a response that is very different he'll be paying a lot of attention to you paying a lot of attention to your needs paying a lot of attention to your wants and desires and how he can serve you the best okay what I actually want you to do if you want the man to go crazy for you what I want you to do instead is I want you to acknowledge the fact that you don't have time for him to be texting and all this good stuff I want you to let him know the reasons for that but then I want you to continue doing it yeah you're on a villain Arc number three this is going to sound very strange but I want you to be vague in the way that you talk about yourself and your desires you don't want to be trauma dumping on these men all your insecurities because it's going to make you very mundane very regular very uninteresting when you point out all of your insecurities in yourself in your life and all that good stuff because all that's going to do is help him realize the things about you that are not as good not as desirable not as amazing now I know you're probably saying to yourself but I just got to be true to myself I I got to be honest about who I am and what I feel and what I think what's wrong with me sharing my answer if he can't accept me for my insecurities then that man's not even for me in the first place okay take a chill pill understand why why you're here you're not here to be in a relationship with every man you're here to be in a relationship with the right man that also means you can't trust every every man with all these intricate uh deep dark secrets and details about yourself and how you feel about yourself there's nothing wrong with sharing your insecurities to with your boyfriend or your husband but it's very different uh from sharing your insecurities with a stranger or a guy you're still getting to know and you don't know yet the example I want to give you is let's say me and you are best friends we're besties we actually are besties so let's imagine we went out for dinner um as besties and we're eating um spaghetti bologan and I'm sitting there and I'm like oh my gosh you will not believe this I've been trying for the past 5 days to pop this ginormous pimple on my forehead can you see how big this pimple is like is it that bad or like it's it's I feel like it's so disgusting and and nasty and you're eating your your spaghetti and you're sitting there thinking to yourself I honestly didn't even notice that pimple until you pointed it out but now that you pointed it out it is kind of a big pimple and now as I'm talking the rest of the time we're hanging out you're actually noticing the pimple not because you really noticed it the first time or when we sat down but more because I pointed it out and now that I pointed it out as an insecurity it became more clear to you and it entered your radar and now you can't unsee it it's kind of the same idea as when you trauma dump on people and tell them all about your insecurities and the and the and the ways that your life is not good and all that good stuff you kind of stop being like this Cinderella dream likee figure that he can chase after and fall in love with breathe in your fart air and all that good stuff and you just kind of become a regular person with regular everyday problems and a regular everyday look and you're just normal you're just chill and I know you're thinking well but that's actually me I don't want him to fall in love with his idea of me that's I want I want him to fall in love with the actual me yes that that sounds great but if you want the guys to to chase after you and pursue you and go crazy for you they have to be able to project onto you for yourself when you were dating guys the guys you like the most do you think you projected on them the most and do you think you projecting onto them made you be more interested in them number four this is hyper important I need you to pay attention look in my eyes look in my soul okay I'm looking in your soul look directly in my soul okay Soul's connected I want you to never ever ever ever validate that man there's still ways plenty of ways to validate men though one of those ways is by giving him Squirtle that's that giving him access to your Squirtle is the number one way to validate him because after you give him access to your Squirtle what can you really say you're an a-hole okay I got access to your Squirtle what does it matter you're you're you're uh so uh rude okay I got access to your Squirtle oh you you mistreat me and you disrespect me okay I got access to your Squirtle right and everything to him is like it doesn't matter what you say doesn't matter what you think doesn't matter what your opinion is because I know in the end I got access to your Squirtle so if your opinion of me was really that low I would have never got that deep of access to you that is validation it's the ultimate version of validation for the guys now the reason I say that is not just to tell you oh don't give him access to your Squirtle that's pretty straightforward what I'm also trying to tell you is even in smaller ways don't validate him do not ease his anxiety okay I told you guys this before don't validate him either don't tell him how much you like him and want to spend time with him and want to be with him and and you just can't stop thinking about spending every waking moment of your entire life with him and you can't wait to wake up next to him and you want to sleep over for three months straight and you want to live at his house and you want to brush your teeth with his toothbrush because you want his his uh his bacteria to be in your mouth too because what that will tell him subconsciously is I'm in a position of power because she likes me so much he's going to know if I were to walk away from this relationship if I were to not want to be with her she's going to be in a lot of pain because she likes me a lot she wants me a lot she wants to be with me a lot and if she's in a lot of pain then I if I were to walk away from the situation then I know I kind of have some leeway to act how I want to act I kind of have some leeway to do what I want to do I kind of have some leeway that if I make a mistake and I just apologize for her she'll probably forgive me because you know she wants to be with me that badly is having high standards if you're thinking about what the dream girl is embodying what her mindset will be how she'll act how she'll carry herself she is going to have very high standards why because she's the dream girl if she's the dream girl there's a lot of men that want her there's a lot of men that want to chase after her there's a lot of men that want to sniff her butthole and be around her and so if that's the case she's going to have very high standards as it relates to the people she'll even accept into her life now you're probably thinking to yourself well don't the men go crazy for the girls with low standards too the men give those girls attention it's very different types of attention but when you have high standards it actually puts you in a position where you once again embody someone who is very unattainable and unavailable and if you're unattainable and unavailable then you're a lot like a dream girl if you're available and you're attainable then you're nothing like the dream girl and the dream girl is the type of girl he's going to be going crazy for the dream girl is the type of girl he's going to be chasing after after like a hungry hyena very important to show him also that you have high standards not enough for him to just see it and hope that he believes it because you tell him that you're challenging him to actually have to put his best foot forward in order to get access to you and when a man is really interested in you that challenge if he's really interested in you will actually force him to put his best foot forward and that challenge will feel a lot like for him like he's on the hunt for you like he really wants to be with you and if he wants to be with you he's going to have to work for you men go crazy the for women that they have to work for that's where the high standards come into play men don't go crazy for girls they don't have to work for Unfortunately they might give them some of their time just to take advantage of them and utilize them for their own pleasure but they're not going crazy for those girls why would they what's there to grow crazy about your standards are low you'll accept anyone into your life you don't care what I do you don't care how I do it you don't care if I apologize or I don't I can say whatever I want however I want I can talk to you how I want I can treat you how I want nothing matters