Key Lessons from "Getting to Yes" by William Ury and Roger Fisher

Introduction

• Founders of the Harvard Negotiation Project.
• Book: "Getting to Yes" focuses on effective negotiation strategies.

Key Concepts

• Negotiation is not about winning or losing.
  • If you're asking who is winning, you've already lost.
• Negotiation is not about splitting things 50/50 or insisting on one's way.

Examples of Effective Negotiation

1. Library Window Scenario:

   • Two men argue over whether a window should be open or closed.
   • Solution: Librarian opens a window in another room, satisfying both parties.

2. Cake Division:

   • Two people can't agree on how to divide a cake.
   • Solution: One cuts the cake, the other chooses the first piece, ensuring fairness.

3. Orange Division:

   • Two kids want an orange; one wants the fruit, the other wants the peel.
   • Solution: If asked why, each child could have received 100% of what they wanted.

Four-Step Framework for Effective Negotiation

1. Focus on Interests, Not Positions

   • Positions are clear but may hide real interests.
   • Discover underlying interests by asking why and understanding the other perspective.

2. Use Fair Standards

   • Utilize objective criteria like market prices, legal requirements, expert opinions.
   • Fair standards shift focus from personal demands to neutral rules.

3. Invent Options for Mutual Gain

   • Brainstorm with no judgment to find creative solutions.
   • Differences can lead to innovative solutions, not problems.

4. Separate the People from the Problem

   • Be soft on the person but hard on the problem.
   • Building relationships can prevent people problems.
   • Engage in informal interactions to strengthen future negotiations.

Handling Difficult Situations

• Dirty Tactics:
  • Recognize and neutralize by mentioning them directly.
• Power Imbalance:
  • Develop a BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement) to increase negotiation power.
• Personal Attacks:
  • Use negotiation jujitsu by sidestepping attacks, understanding positions, and inviting feedback.

Conclusion

• Negotiation is about collaboration, not competition.
  • Example: Frisbee story in 1964 illustrates the futility of asking "who's winning" in negotiation.
  • The goal is to work together and find mutually satisfying solutions.

Closing

• Understanding and applying these strategies leads to better negotiation outcomes.
• The focus should always be on satisfying both parties' interests.