[Music] the lover energy is utterly opposed at least at first glance to the other energies of the mature masculine his interests are the opposite of the Warriors The Magicians and the King's concerns for boundaries containment order and discipline began to look closer at the comparative mythological studies of Campbell and others and began to notice the uh predominance in all of these uh these uh images and cross-cultural traditions of AOS the lover archetype which is always present always problematic in all these in all these stories and so began to to uh to realize that that had to be included and began to study that as a good typical male uh the lover archetype is not one of the easiest ones for men to understand very well unless they're Border Lines if they're borderline male they tend to know a lot about the lover archetype or an addictive male I try not to be perfectionistic with people about this I try to say look if you're really in touch with this energy that's a plus you know so uh so for example if you're an alcoholic and you're flooded with lover energy at least you got the lover energy and um one of the things that's bad about the way we do diagnostics in Clinical Psychology today is that we tend to really pathologize people who you know a lot a lot of great number of Border lines are in here and if you're a borderline personality and you know enough to know about in borderline you really feel bad about yourself oh God you know I'm really an unstable personality and I've got you know all these problems and you know and I'm I'm I'm not very high on the developmental Continuum you know well you know that you can argue that sort of thing and you have to use all sorts of of uh I think you have to use all sorts of primate uh evidence and all sorts of other things to look at that but the way I prefer to think about that is to think in terms of what the lover part of the psyche in a man or a woman is capable of and what it's not capable of and in my view the archetype of lover in male and female is totally promiscuous it has no Fidelity in it it is polymorphous erotic it it loves everything it is it is uh the in a man it's the it's the male uh version of Aphrodite and I like to say to people you know people like to say no that's you know that's not real love and I I think that that they just don't understand the erotic because the uh I was just you know if you listen to poets talk you know you get to listen to poets talk about what's important what's valuable you know I was just listening to One young poet talking and he was singing out of the lover archetype you know you just hear hear that lover song well all these people trying to tell you what to do about Duty and responsibility and everything and the only thing that's important is you know it's kind of like follow your bliss you know well where does the Bliss of the lover go does it go to just one person nope the Bliss of the lover goes to all people it's not even consistently heterosexual it's B sexual it's not even bisexual it's polysexual it's it's Freud's polymorphous perverse except I choose not to say poly why I call that perverse that's just Freud's problem it's polymorphous erotic he laes men women animals trees you know you know a lot of these new age types crystals you know God I just love my Crystal you know you know in fact the way you understand you know a lot of people get real moralistic about Christmas time when everybody's into their present buying well that's just the lover coming out the lover loves things everything and you know the theologians talk about sacramental Consciousness well that's what this is this lover energy coming out and it loves everything it doesn't love just one folk one person so where does Fidelity come from you tell me look at this thing and tell me where you get Fidelity doesn't come out of the king and queen at all if you'll notice kings and queens tend to have a lot of consorts bring on S Francis Drake you know boy he's a handsome young man bring him into my court says the queen you know if you study the king stuff when a man's in this King archetype and you know in ancient world I mean they were not humans in having an ego self access with this archetype they were the archetype and they had Herms you know a sulan with a Harum well you see I don't think that's male see some people like say well I just a male women are naturally you know monogamous I think yeah that's women are nationally monogamous until they get in touch with their lover they're inexhaustable and that's right then they're then they're inexhaustible and they can stand a lot more lovers than the men so uh here's where Fidelity comes from and only here there is no other place in the psyche that Fidelity comes from isn't that interesting think about that it is a warrior and uh and if if you're going to have a committed relationship that's monogamous it will be because of the development of your Warrior side not because of the development of your lover I have all these men come in I don't know what's wrong with me said I really do love such and such but you know I met so and so the other day and my God I had an erection immediately what's wrong with me said well you're a good healthy ape what's wrong what do you mean what's wrong with you you're a good healthy ape your lover side's intact it always will be I don't care how much you love and or committed to this person when that when that uh animal self in you is around another animal self than the foms or right or whatever you call those little things uh you'll be attracted and you will never be faithful because you feel like it that is to say if you're in touch with your lover energy now if you're a good compulsive and split off from your lover energy you'll will be real faithful probably and you'll think you're so Superior and really it would simply be because you're split off from the lover energy and your sister or your brother or somebody else is carrying the lover for you and the projection but then you have a midlife crisis and you get in touch with the lover and all of a sudden you're uh promiscuous is can be see so