Lecture on Voice Tones in Negotiation

Key Concepts and Voice Tones

Three Default Voice Tones

1. Assertive (Fight Type) Voice: Direct and Honest

   • Natural-born tone of the speaker (e.g., Donald Trump)
   • Exercise example: "I need a car in 60 seconds or she dies."
   • Causes problems, often perceived as combative.

2. Accommodator’s Voice: Relationship-Oriented

   • Naturally smiley and positive.
   • Increases intelligence by 31% when in a positive frame of mind.
   • Engages mirror neurons, causing involuntary mimicry and chemical changes in the brain.

3. Late-Night FM DJ Voice: Calm and Slowing

   • Used by hostage negotiators; drilled extensively.
   • Slows down the listener’s brain, making immovable terms feel less combative.
   • Example: "We don’t do work for hire."

Additional Topics

Mirroring in Negotiation

• Mirroring is the act of imitating the other person to create a sense of empathy and connection.
• Important for making the other party feel understood and in sync.

Indicators and Red Flags

• Win-Win Statements: When someone brings up a win-win deal early, it could be an indicator they might be aiming to get the upper hand.
• Important distinctions between genuine and manipulative win-win approaches.

Proof of Life in Deals

• Assessing whether a potential deal is genuine early on to avoid time-wasters.
• If a potential client fails the 'Proof of Life' test, it’s better to walk away early.

Context and Emotional Intelligence

• Essential for understanding negotiation dynamics. Contextual and emotional intelligence involve assessing both verbal and non-verbal cues for better outcomes.
• Being willing to occasionally get taken advantage of can be part of a strategic long game.

Rituals and Daily Practices

• Successful negotiators and business leaders often have daily rituals to enhance their effectiveness.
• Examples include morning routines, focusing on physical rituals to trigger mental states, and practices involving gratitude to shift emotional states.

Proper Use of Persuasion

• Ethical Considerations: Persuasion should be used ethically to build trust and ensure long-term success.
• Organizational Impact: Unethical use of persuasion often leads to internal conflict and attracts dishonest individuals, which can harm the organization in the long run.

Advice for Entrepreneurs

• Focus attention on the message and the most persuasive elements before delivering a negotiation point.
• Establish common ground (e.g., relationships) to make others more amenable to requests.
• Small changes in language, such as asking for advice instead of opinions, can foster a collaborative atmosphere.