hey danad let's play headbands no Jeffy I'm not going to put a headband on I'm not in a gang no danad it's a game I hold a word above my head and you give me hints until I guess your word right that could be fun let's try it all right go ooh ooh you have one of these in your nose right now boogers no it's yellow my shirt what no you can draw with it poop what no it has a pink tip my pee PE what no you can break it my PE PE what no Jeffy you can use it in school AR-15 extended mag no it's a pencil Jeffy oh why didn't you just say that who's at the door hold on Jeffy stay here hello hey Marvin Goodman what are you doing here well I came by to tell you that I did one of those 23 in me DNA tests and come to find out I have a 99% chance of getting out of a speeding ticket and a 1% chance of them randomly searching my car you're 1% black that's right n you can't say that word yes I can I have the pass I've been saying it all day I can't stop saying it I was singing Nas and Paris in the car on the way over here I think you have to be a certain per block to say that word Goodman wow Marvin after all my people have been through we can't say one word I guess I'll just take my reparations in the form of your house payment I don't have my house payment Goodman wow the white man trying to bring a brother down speaking of brother the DNA test also said that I have a brother from another mother you have a brother I sure do and I invited him over to your house why my house well because I'm rich and I want to meet him and I don't want to invite him to my house because then he's going to see how Filthy Rich I am and then he's going to try to mooch off me okay so why would you invite him here I mean he's eventually going to find out you're rich anyway I know but I want him to think I'm as normal as possible so what I want you to do is is to create a nice steak dinner tonight what normal people don't eat steak dinners every night well I'm not talking about filet minan Marvin I'm talking about an Applebee sirloin okay I'll ask Chef Pee if he can make just regular steaks all right thanks Marvin I'm coming in God damn girl yeah throw it back like that I like that Chef peee oh hey Marvin you want to know what a good pasta sound like yeah nice and wet but it's super tight you know what I'm talking about what are you even cooking oh I'm chicken Alfred don't you know the Pentagon is the most secure building in the United States with cameras all around it but only C four blurry frames of the plane crashing with no impact to the wings on 911 yeah I know it's a super long name but damn it's going to be delicious well I was wondering if you can make us you know like a fancy steak dinner tonight come on you know who you talking to it's your penis of course I can make a fancy dinner you know what fancy is I'm a fancy Chef I am fancy okay well can you just make a steak dinner not too fancy but just two steaks please well I can do it I can do it go ahead leave it up pee PE baby I got you okay oo Bon peties the big fake ones man I really add did myself this time this steak dinner looks delicious where was the shrimp caught oh the freezer section of Walmart duh and where was the broccoli caught also the freezer section of Walmart did you whack off in my Caesar salad no that's the ranch you silly Billy you didn't even use the right dressing on my Caesar look this is a chef PP certified meal definitely going to give you diarrhea at the end of it ask Marvin ain't that right Marvin oh that must be my brother at the door Marvin I I'll answer no no no no no you can't answer the door too fast poor people answer the door fast because they have nothing better to do and they don't have a job like you rich people don't answer the door at all because they have their Butler do it because they're too busy working so we can't answer the door too fast and we can't answer the door too slow we don't want to seem too rich or too poor so we'll make him wait he just rang the doorbell again make him wait he's knocking make him wait really hard make him wait okay now hello hello you must be my brother Mr Goodman I'm Mr hoodman Excuse me for one second Marvin I didn't know he was black you just found out today you were 1% black well then he must be the other 99% hello my name is Mr Goodman I Am Lower middle class what do you do for work oh I build Section 8 houses and sell it to the government for a huge profit oh my portfolio is worth like 4 billion Marvin he's Rich As [ __ ] I I was just kidding about being lower middle class I'm totally a billionaire too are you sure why would you invite me here well because I wanted to show you that I too help out the poor this place reeks of poverty I know it's Marvin's house I don't live here I don't live on this Farm thank God I didn't want my brother to be poor yeah and you should see the dinner he provided for us it's Walmart shrimp ew poor and wild grown Walmart broccoli e poor laughs and high credit score come on indubitably oh I'm sorry Mr hoodman Please Don't Judge Me on this poor meal I wouldn't even feed this to the homeless me either chives dinner time woof woof here you go boy dinner time sir I must say that I hate that you have me crawl around and act like a dog this is an English short hair he's like 900 years old in dog years I think he's also a little bit [ __ ] wow what a nice Mone can I pet him no he bites but when he shits on the floor I rub his nose in it that's because you don't give me a bathroom well you had a litter box but you [ __ ] that up didn't you bud well you didn't give me a scoop to clean it out with you made me use my hands and now where do you [ __ ] my hands good boy now eat your Walmart shrimp and broccoli oh it's going to give me the runs I feel bad for your hands sir is there anything else I can help you with yeah you can get this shitty food out of my [ __ ] face and bring me and my brother something more appetizing your brother yes that's my brother so take the food and bring us something yummy oh very well sir all right here you are sir fried chicken from Kentucky and grape Kool-Aid Jammers for your brother chares you racist [ __ ] but but sir this is what you usually tell me to get when we have hush very well sir I'm so sorry Mr hoodman chives was born in Alabama during those times times I was born in London spanking very well sir may I do the honors oh please yeah go ahead you Prejudice bastard how dare you bring me KMC even though it's a delicious meal now ches you go [ __ ] in your hand and think about what you did but sir I don't have to go mirx now the whole bottle yes and I want you to cup in your hand and bring it to me and show me what you did very well sir I'm so sorry Mr hoodman you need to teach your butler better manners see my butler El Salvador would never disrespect me El Salvador yeah El Salvador would you like to meet him sure oh El Salvador bring your Mexican ass in here right now fomos the the Explorer you call for me Mr hubman smart you hired your Gardener to also be your butler so you didn't have to pay two people I like it exactly I either pay them in pesos or queso nine times out of 10 is queso I like it the queso and Che and you know I have the female model of this and she rides around in my Lamborghini and gives me Road thanks oh I need the female model speaking of the Lamborghini I was thinking about buying me one can I test drive yours sure anything for my rich billionaire brother here you go a thanks brother may I Converse in Mexican with your help oh definitely oh Salvador my brother wants you to speak your native tongue orada okay so what you want to talk about de dond El Salvador no I from me a inota but I was born in Arizona right so how long have you been working for Mr hoodman Mr hoodman picked me up from Home Depot today and gave me like $100 to pretend to be his Gardener wait so you don't really work for Mr hoodman no we over here and on the way he say something about him stealing your car and sing it for scrap metal what the [ __ ] hey are you going to finish this chicken d d is Sous so does that mean like no or no K El poo I don't know your thing I don't no run hos Marvin Marvin I've been robbed help me who robbed you my brother Mr hoodman what' he steal he stole my Lamborghini and I should have known he was going to steal my Lamborghini by the color of his suit because he had the exact same suit as me and I know that the guy who made my suit told me that he was only going to sell those suits to me so that means he stole the suit too and I also should have known that he was going to steal the Lamborghini because he asked to borrow the Lamborghini ew borrowing everyone who's rich knows that the first thing you do when you get money is buy a Lamborghini okay well how do you know he stole it because he hired some guy from Home Depot and that guy told me everything okay well so if you really think he stole it you need to call the cops I'm going to call the cops Marvin next time someone says don't judge a book by their cover I'm going to tell them they're full of [ __ ] because the cover of the book tells you what the whole [ __ ] book's about the title and everything hey there did somebody call the police I did I'd like to report a theft okay what was stolen my Lamborghini oh nice car nice car can you give me a description of the suspect yeah well he's black oh yeah it's all coming together wait did he have both his arms yes dispatch we got a suspect armed and dangerous black don't worry sir we're going to get your car back but it may smell like marijuana well just please give me my car back please we'll do sir there's someone at the door I'll get it uh Goodman it was your brother oh him him that's the guy all right you're under arrest for what for stealing this man's Lamborgini and making it smell like marijuana I would never he let me borrow his car is this true well yeah but El Salvador said that he was going to steal my Lamborghini and sell it for parts damn it that racist Mexican he always tells jokes and makes me look like I'm a bad guy where ice I'm going to get his ass deported wait he's an illegal get your ass over here nothing no get your ass back over that wall yeah no wow Mr Goodman I can't believe you actually would believe that I I was steal your car well it's not my fault rice and beans told me you were going to steal my Lamborghini and sell it for parts damn I can't believe you would think that low of me I guess I'll see you in a couple of years when you actually mature no Mr hoodman no Marvin hat help all right sir I have shut in my hand good boy why would he [ __ ] in his hand cuz he doesn't have a litter box [Music]