How to Pleasure a Woman with Your Hands - Lecture by Lindsay Darger

Introduction

• Presenter: Lindsay Darger, Certified Sex Educator and Relationship Coach
• Topic: Techniques to pleasure a woman in the bedroom using your hands.
• Importance: Builds confidence, helps to please vulva owners (girlfriend, wife, etc.)

Basic Principles

Hygiene

• Importance: Prevents infections (e.g., UTIs, yeast infections)
• Step 1: Always wash hands before starting

Lubrication

• Necessity: Avoid using dry fingers or toys
• Natural lubrication: Arousal fluids or use additional lubricants
• Difference: Arousal fluid vs. discharge
  • Discharge: Varies with menstrual cycle, not an indicator of arousal
  • Arousal fluid: Produced during sexual arousal

Female Menstrual Cycle

Phases

• Menstruation: Winter - dry phase (bleeding)
• Follicular Phase: Spring - transition from dry to wet
• Ovulation: Summer - wet phase
• Luteal Phase: Fall - transition back to dry

Female Anatomy

Vulva Anatomy

• Mons Pubis: Fatty tissue for protection
• Outer Labia (Labia Majora): Hair-covered, outer lips
• Inner Labia (Labia Minora): Sensitive inner lips
• Clitoris: Extremely sensitive with 8,000-12,000 nerve endings
  • Clitoral Hood: Covers the clitoral head
• Urethra: Opening for urination
• Vaginal Opening: Leads to vaginal canal

Internal Structures

• Clitoris: Complex structure with head, shaft, legs, and vestibular bulbs
• G-Spot: Located on anterior wall of the vagina, spongy and ridged
• Urethral Sponge: Swells during arousal, associated with female ejaculation (squirting)

Techniques for Effective Fingering

Preparation

• Arousal Time: Takes about 15 minutes for clitoris to become erect, indicating readiness
• Foreplay: Kissing, massaging, stimulating other sensitive areas

Execution

• Insertion: Softly insert one or two fingers
• Motion: "Come here" motion towards the belly button to stimulate the G-Spot
• G-Spot Stimulation: Massage the spongy area on the anterior wall of the vagina
• Rhythm: Start slow and steady, gradually increase speed/pressure; listen for cues like "don’t stop," "harder," or "faster"
• Ejaculation Technique: Fast, hard, consistent pressure on the G-Spot

Additional Tips

• Communication: Essential for understanding what your partner likes
• Variations: Different women prefer different kinds of stimulation
• Tools: Invest in squirt blankets for easy clean-up

Conclusion

• Focus on Feedback: Enhances learning and growth in sexual techniques
• Enjoyment: Sex should be playful, enjoyable, and stress-free
• Respect: Always respect and listen to your partner’s needs and feedback