yo what up Noel appreciate you for the super chat noel appreciate you for the super chat appreciate you for the super chat i'm about to give y'all the real on how this [ __ ] feel in 3 months i'm not just going to come with the pros the pros the pros the pros n I gotta keep it all the way 100 i gotta keep it all the way 100 i'm just gonna put it to you like this i'mma keep it all the way 100 one thing that I noticed bro it's like my patience went up but my patience got drastically low bro i got to really be careful but it should be making me want to crash out i got to keep it real with y'all bro but I be ready to smack the [ __ ] out of people bro i got to keep it 100 with y'all bro see they don't talk about the side effects for real all these dudes say the same [ __ ] no I'm going to be the one to be different keep it 100 bro i be having to really catch myself bro i be want to snap on my girl out of nowhere i be want to just cuss her the [ __ ] out i'm telling y'all bro i got to keep it real can we keep it real bro i be wanting to just cuss her the [ __ ] out for no [ __ ] bro i just be aggravated she been trying to throw the cat at me i be getting pissed off i just went a whole damn near two days without talking to her cuz she was just trying to get me to drain my energy she not understanding where I'm going with I'm like I need this energy to create so you don't understand about chakras and the alignment you don't really understand about this [ __ ] you don't really understand about chakras you don't understand about the alignment you don't really understand how you're supposed to use this [ __ ] to help you manifest to help you create you don't really understand it just sound like blah blah that's why I don't like explaining to her cuz it just sound like blah blah blah blah blah blah blah you don't know about the chakras you don't really know about energy manipulate energy manifestation you don't really know about how you use this [ __ ] to help you speak things into existence metaphysics you don't really know what I know when it comes to this [ __ ] you know cuz I did learn a lot of this [ __ ] being a Mason you don't really understand this [ __ ] she think I'm just saying some old hoopla hoopla some more crazy [ __ ] she be wondering why I be so like and yeah I'm going to be real with y'all speaking of that let me just be 100 with you i feel like it could cause problems in your relationship i feel like it could cause problems in your relationship cuz people still got needs people still got wants i feel like that's why majority of women probably do feel like that done dated me they need to step out or they probably done cheated and I ain't mad about it cuz sometimes in life you got to kind of be selfish sometimes in life you got to kind of be selfish sometimes you just got to not give a [ __ ] sometimes you got to put yourself first when you trying to master yourself and master these energies that's flowing through our body that billions of people see let me tell you something right you know why when you see a lot of these pictures of the devil he's red did you know that that that was a metaphor i'm going to say it again you ever notice like if you look at if you look at pictures of the devil on Google he's red right that's a metaphor if you ever looked at a picture of the chakras right your root chakra is red is speaking about you being indoors with your lust and how lust rule the world how lust is like a deity it's like a god but it's like a negative god that's draining your energy that what goes over a lot of people head is a metaphor he's not really red that's representing your root chakra and it's talking about the lust the psychological warfare and the temptation he get you through the temptation of the mind this is why you got to be careful what you look at he get you through the temptation of your mind it's all a metaphor you ever notice a picture of the devils is always red and then he got horns to represent you being horny and he's red it represents your root chakra the lowest chakra the lowest vibration that you could be in that's what it represent when you thinking with your dick that's what it's representing when you at your lowest vibration it's talking about the chakras it's talking about alignment it's talking about the chakras i know what she think sounds super super crazy whatever whatever whatever but I just don't do what everybody else is [ __ ] doing i know it sound crazy to her what the [ __ ] is he talking about chakras and energy and all this [ __ ] i get it but I feel like it could cause problems in your relationship cuz I feel like me and my girl be having more and more disagreements now cuz I ain't been [ __ ] her and she was just complaining to me about it last night on some real [ __ ] that's just me being 100 with you she was just complaining to me about it last night i'm being so serious bro she was literally just complaining to me about it like let me I ain't I ain't going to I ain't going to say exactly what she was saying but she was just complaining about it so anyways though I got to be 100 with y'all for some reason I just been feeling more irritable a little bit like I've been having to really real deal catch myself i'm I'mma talk about the pros but I got to talk about some of the cons that I don't feel like a lot of [ __ ] be speaking about i feel like I just be more frustrated i'm not going to lie to you and and let me keep it 100 with y'all i still to this day be battling the temptation i'm just learning to master it a lot of times when I come on here and have conversation with y'all it helped me cuz I woke up you got to understand but when you reach a certain level your sex drive gets super high and y'all got to understand I'm on testosterone this is why I'll be explaining to a lot of the young men that's watching if you can't even handle your own natural testosterone and being on C retention don't hop on test boosters you not ready for this [ __ ] this [ __ ] get dark i'm trying to tell y'all y'all don't get it listen if you can't handle your own natural testosterone bro you already can't handle no fat and C retention with your normal testosterone don't hop on no testosterone do not hop on no testosterone pills or testosterone injections i'm warning you it's going to [ __ ] your mind up you can get sick in the head i'm warning you you going to go on a binge it's going to [ __ ] your mind up master your normal testosterone first master controlling your normal sex drive first because if you don't you're going to have what's called an imbalance it's going to be a chemical imbalance so what's going to happen is you're going to go down a binge you're going to go down a binge let me block you cuz you a goofy you're going to go on a binge it's like if somebody go on an alcoholic binge what's an alcoholic binge if they probably didn't drink for a year or two months and as soon as they start drinking they just overindulor now they getting drunk as [ __ ] every single day you're going to go on a binge ask me how I know it happened to me when I was younger when I first got on it I wasn't used to my sex drive just being through the roof i feel like I have to [ __ ] my girl three four five times a day i started feeling like I was sick in the head i keep it 100 with you i started feeling like I was controlled i felt like I was a prisoner in my own body it started feeling very abnormal then when I when I wouldn't indulge in it I started feeling like I had [ __ ] anxiety [ __ ] i started literally feeling sick in the head bro i'm telling you like I start like my body started to feel sick like I was withdrawing all right bro i'm telling you bro i started feeling like I was getting sick like I was real deal withdrawing i started feeling like I would have all type anxiety and be super anxious but I started feeling off bro so I'm just warning you like if you can't handle your natural testosterone if you can't handle your natural sex drive your natural hormones without being enhanced I don't think you should hop on no type of no type of form of testosterone i don't even know if you should hop on creatin or some of the other supplements I told you about because that [ __ ] all increases testosterone and you'll start to feel crazy i'm warning you you'll start to feel crazy a lot of yall not going to listen to me you going to learn the hard way and wish you took my advice you're going to feel crazy promise you you going to notice you going to get on that [ __ ] and it's like your mind going to get sick you going to feel like a prisoner on your own [ __ ] body i been there done that you start feeling sick in the head so a lot of y'all don't be understanding like a lot of times why I would just get on live so long and just be on TikTok live so long or be on YouTube live so long because it would take my mind off that [ __ ] it would take my mind off of it because sometimes when you work out that only help for a couple hours especially if you work legs and then within a couple hours your your hormones be through the [ __ ] roof on God sometimes the work I only help a couple hours y'all be wondering why some nights I'm on here just kicking it with y'all to the point where I get tired might be 4 5 in the morning a lot of times you just keep my mind off of that [ __ ] communicating with the bros be helping me having these conversations be helping me and I've been practicing this [ __ ] for years but having these conversations real deal be helping me because a lot of these dudes be making it seem like it's super super just all the way super easy but sometimes I feel like from coming from an enhanced athlete coming from an enhanced athlete that's on testosterone it's a lot more difficult that's why I kind of don't be having no mercy on [ __ ] that be natural and [ __ ] and they can't handle their own testosterone i'm like "Bro come on bro you wouldn't want to walk in my shoes than being enhanced to be on no actual testosterone do you know how much more difficult it is to you can't handle it naturally do you You wouldn't want to handle having your testosterone enhanced make sure y'all double tap the screen make sure y'all like the live if you can't handle your natural testosterone don't you dare try to hop on no [ __ ] testosterone pills or because this [ __ ] is strong and it's powerful don't you dare try to hop on it i'm just being real with y'all bro if you can't handle it naturally don't hop on no testosterone bro people need to warn people about that [ __ ] this [ __ ] is not a game bro this [ __ ] is serious dead ass i feel like it can make you sick in the mind i'm dead ass cuz bro I started feeling sick in my early 20s like sick in the head like it made it worse for me like real deal i see my I felt like I couldn't be around no woman without objectifying her body like every woman I be around I just be wanting to [ __ ] like I'd be at the gymnas feeling thirsty as hell to the point I feel sick sometimes you have to catch yourself or you'll crash real bro real [ __ ] bro i start feeling sick a lot of [ __ ] don't keep it real like this and tell the truth when I first got on this [ __ ] when I was younger cuz the testosterone that I was taking was a lot stronger they made it a lot weaker they said it had the same ingredients as steroids so they made it a lot more weaker [ __ ] I felt sick in the mind bro like like real deal I felt sick in the mind bro i'm telling you I felt like every woman I seen I would just want to stare at their ass all day stare at their titties imagine me having sex with them i felt sick in the mind i'm telling y'all bro i felt sick in the [ __ ] mind hold on this is not normal though hold on hold on hold on i shouldn't be feeling this [ __ ] thirsty this is abnormal you got to catch yourself that's why like when I start having those weird emotion I'm need to just leave the gym or some [ __ ] i don't feel right in the mind bro this feels off this feels sick cuz I wasn't realizing that that [ __ ] was boosting my [ __ ] hormones through the [ __ ] roof it had my [ __ ] energy through the [ __ ] roof i felt thirsty as hell [ __ ] i started feeling like I was a real deal addict it had an opposite effect on me but then when I would come off the testosterone I would feel normal again when I would be on it [ __ ] I used to start feeling crazy in the mind i'm telling y'all bro real deal [ __ ] appreciate you Quincy appreciate you i'm telling y'all bro i'm just keeping it 100 with y'all that's pros and cons to it that's why I always try to tell a lot of the young men that might be "Oh I want to get on testosterone i want to use enhancements." Master your energy naturally first you don't want to just do that bro if you can't handle say your natural testosterone levels right now is a 400 and you hop on some testosterone and your levels jump to a a 800 900 do you know what you're really doing to yourself bro this is grown man business yeah I'm on that black coffee you know I can't be doing all this talking game without having some black coffee bro some real [ __ ] if your natural testosterone levels right now is a 300 and you can't even handle that you steady fapping you steady watching porn you steady lusting for some [ __ ] you bugged out could you imagine if your levels just jumped up to 900 a,000 and you got all that testosterone flowing through you all that energy and you can't even [ __ ] handle your levels at a 300 what the [ __ ] you going to do if your [ __ ] jump up to a 700 a 800 see it's levels to this [ __ ] bro most of the dudes that y'all watch that saw it they are natural everybody know I'm not natural they're natural so of course it's probably a lot easier for them i took a more difficult route being and I learned this [ __ ] from Dorian Yates it was a video from Dorian Yates a famous retired Hall of Famer bodybuilder i don't know if y'all know who Dorian Yates was when he was speaking about people trying to walk in the same like energy field that he walking in he was talking some real knowledgeable [ __ ] he was like "Could you imagine how I feel being on steroids not having sex and just working out every day for [ __ ] 90 days?" And he had this crazy look in his eye that's one of the videos that motivated me low key too this was a old video I seen i was watching this [ __ ] like 2017 16 when Dor Yanks was speaking about going 90 days being enhanced and just working out and no sex and being disciplined it's a lot easier when you natural being real with you way easier when you get enhanced [ __ ] but the the benefit of it though I'm going to be real with you if you learn to ma master your sex drive when you're enhanced and your levels is in the 700s 800s 900s once you come off the testosterone and you go back to your natural level it' be a piece of [ __ ] cake now it seemed easy because you used to having your testosterone in the 700s 800s 900s so when you drop back down to your natural levels your natural testosterone level might only be a 300 400 when you go back down to your natural levels it's going to feel super easy it's going to feel like nothing cuz you used to your sex drive being through the [ __ ] roof you used to being chemically enhanced and have your testosterone pop pumping on an abnormal superhuman level so when you come back down to your natural levels you like "Bitch this ain't nothing this ain't shit." That's how I That's how I got it that's how I ended up going on super long streaks because I was so used to being on so much testosterone and I had moments in my life when I was blasting which I do not suggest doing and it's dangerous you can die what do I mean by blasting i had moments where I was taking 40 50 60 testosterone boosters at once on top of my other supplements I was wowing that's called blasting it's very dangerous it's not recommended you can literally die doing that it's not recommended yeah I was blasting bro it's not recommended i'm telling you right now this is not recommended them when you taking them at them high doses bro it's literally like you on steroids it's I'm telling you right now it's not recommended i don't recommend that it's very dangerous take the recommended dose do not do what I was doing cuz it's like I was taking so much I felt like cuz I used to be super angry bro and to be honest with you I didn't give a [ __ ] if I lived or died i knew the risk that came with it and I was just super angry when I was younger i wasn't taking my health in account i didn't give a damn i didn't give a [ __ ] i was just super super angry when I was young don't know why i was just angry all the [ __ ] time so it's like it's kind of like I was like punishing myself for being angry by taking more and more and more and more and more it's weird i can't explain it it was [ __ ] with my mind i'm telling you that's why I realized like I wish I wouldn't have did that [ __ ] because I spent so much money on testosterone young because I just be blowing through jars y'all don't understand some of them jars come with 150 i use that [ __ ] in two or three days literally on God i'm just being real with y'all the recommended dosage only be saying like some of them say only take four only take six to it last you so you're not blowing your money make sure I double tap the screen I like the live if you do that you going to blow a lot of [ __ ] money bro that [ __ ] going to start burning through your pockets cuz I would just use a jar in like a day or two [ __ ] be gone then I got to go right back to GNC buy another one within a week [ __ ] I was easily running two four or five bottles easy you know how much money I was spending on that [ __ ] bro i was wowing i was bugging out low key even though I was strong as a ox I was mentally [ __ ] up lowkey off all that testosterone that's why I was so aggressive that's why I was so vicious i kept getting into [ __ ] ass fights see these the a lot of [ __ ] ain't going to talk to you about the cons let me tell you something about testosterone that these other [ __ ] ain't going to tell you about if you an [ __ ] and you got a [ __ ] up attitude if you're already a piece of [ __ ] is going to bring that [ __ ] to the surface even more that's what y'all don't realize you won't be able to hide it if you an [ __ ] and you got a [ __ ] up attitude and you be on [ __ ] I don't give a [ __ ] how much you try to mask it it's going to bring that [ __ ] to the [ __ ] surface that [ __ ] going to manifest if you an aggressive person a vicious person with a [ __ ] up attitude a [ __ ] up conscious a [ __ ] up way that you perceive life you be on straight dog [ __ ] it's going to bring it to the surface if you a cool [ __ ] and you a laidback [ __ ] it's going to bring that to the surface it enhances and amplifies who you already are so I was finding myself this is why I lost a lot of jobs low key i'm just being 100 with y'all bro i'm telling you to cause mine this [ __ ] because I was going without having sex and it's already something called sexual frustration and then I'm blasting testosterone i'm not even taking the recommended dosages like before I go to work I took like 50 of them on top of my other testo my other supplements and there was a point in time when I was running two different testosterones so I would take 30 of the P6 testosterone then I take 30 of the muscle text on top of my other supplements [ __ ] I was angry as [ __ ] all day and irritable i wasn't even realizing how much I was in a [ __ ] like a destructive mindset that's one of the reasons I ended up whooping That's one of the reasons I ended up whooping one of my boss's ass when I was doing the construction [ __ ] cuz I was irritable then when he pushed me y'all seen the video when he pushed me I just snapped cuz I was trying to deescalate the situation at first and I kept telling him like "Yo chill chill chill bro chill." And he pushed me like two times but the third time y'all know who Chel Sunn is that's in the UFC i thought about Chel Sunn when he made a video basically saying you could not let them get too close when he was getting into it with um what's his name vander what's his name vanderlay Silver or some [ __ ] and that's when they was doing a UFC Ultimate Fighter and Chel Sun was like "I can't let you get close i can't let you get close i can't let you break the the distance." I started thinking about what Chel Sunn said i went into it's either fight flight or freeze i went to fight flight or freeze after that second time he pushed me I'm like "Bro stop putting your hands in me." He's on video i kept telling him then he said he was going to physically remove me see so once he said he was going to physically remove me and he touched me again I'm like "Yo bro physically remove me then you want to keep on [ __ ] touching me physically remove me then [ __ ] physic just popped on them i didn't even mean to just popped him i didn't even mean to shout out to that [ __ ] that's the homie Cory shout out to him i didn't even mean to pop on you like that but [ __ ] I was on Mad Testosterone and I was on SRMS at the time [ __ ] i'm telling you I literally used to pop 30 P6s 30 of the Muscle Tech on top of my [ __ ] SRMS on top of the other supplements I was on [ __ ] i was lowkey out of my [ __ ] mind i'm being real with y'all i was not in my right mind i was not and I'm smoking weed on top of that i'm drinking beers at work cuz a lot of them construction [ __ ] got habits bro 30 Noel on my mama i'm taking a total of 60 so I wake up in the morning time right i have breakfast i take 30 muscle tests and then take another 30 other P6 so now I'm I'm mixing testosterone so now you mixing chemicals which you're not supposed to do this is why this [ __ ] is considered witchcraft and individuals don't understand this [ __ ] this is why it's considered witchcraft on top of that I would make me some coffee cuz I would wake up extra early so if I had to be to work at 6:00 I'd be up by 4:00 cuz I always knew I had to take it with some food on my stomach so I have a small breakfast i take my testosterone i wait till like 500 5:30 when I'm getting ready to leave then I would take my [ __ ] sirens and my other supplements and I'm out the door on my way to work so that day I was already blasting that's what it's called blasting and cruising so when broke kept touching me and pushing me telling me to get the [ __ ] off the work side I keep trying to talk about yo chill chill chill bro chill chill chill bro but when he put his hands on me that third time something snapped in my brain and he said I'm going to physically remove you if you don't leave i might physically remove me then [ __ ] you talking about i'm not going to keep playing this nice guy role but now that I think about it I should have just left that's very dangerous especially for people with bad temper exactly cuz my temper was already bad as hell now that I think about it as a grown man I should have just left cuz that all happened cuz I wanted my paycheck but he was telling me "I'm not giving you your paycheck you going to have to go to the main office to get your check." I should have just left i should have just left now that I look back at it I should just [ __ ] left went to the main building like he said and just got my check and avoided that whole situation i should have just left like "You know what you got it no problem." I should have just dipped i should just went took a walk took a breather whatever I needed to do to get my mind right should have just been a grown mature man and just walked away should just left but I was only like what 24 i was a lot more younger i was a lot more immature i thought [ __ ] was just about violence violence violence violence you got to prove yourself if I could go back in time at this mature age I You got it bro no problem bro whatever i'll go back to the main building you got it bro no problem bro i ain't Man you got it bro say less bet i'm out of here and he was mad he was upset because when I was roofing right early that morning the CNA job called me for the hospital this is when I started working at the hospital they called me for an interview at the hospital so I said "Bro I got to leave i'll be back." So I went to my interview for the CNA [ __ ] to work at ECMC which is a hospital in Buffalo New York so when I came back from the interview I guess they was getting off early that day we used to get off of work at like 10:00 11 at night and we used to start at like 6:00 7:00 in the morning so they was getting done early that day cuz they didn't have enough people so when I came back he was pissed off like "You left us we had all this work to do we already about to [ __ ] we already about to leave." That's why he was saying in the video like "We're already done you might as well just leave." Blah blah blah blah blah they was getting off early so I'm like "Yo bro let me get my check." He like "I'm not giving you your check you left us when we had mad work to do you got to go to the main building to get your check i should have just walked away but I'm steady having a back and forth with him and he just kept pushing me so after that third time he pushed me and he said "Oh I'm going to physically remove you if you don't leave." I just popped on him bing knocked them out see this [ __ ] 4x be talking about he knocking [ __ ] out but we don't see no proof that's just word of mouth we don't see no proof and y'all see I don't be all extra out like F extra talking this big hot boy [ __ ] i'll be cooling cuz I really get busy that's the difference the [ __ ] that really really get busy that really put hands on [ __ ] that really knock [ __ ] out they don't got to overdo it and be all extrased out cuz we ain't see no proof of that full extra [ __ ] fighting [ __ ] i seen them ducking King Pill and making up excuse why he didn't want to fight King Pill and then low key uh lowkey like ducking Aaron the plumber then he was supposed to fight the UFC fighter what happened to that that one UFC fighter he went to fight was lone savage that nigga's a street [ __ ] he just got booked for like a arm robb whatever the one UFC fighter [ __ ] got mad tattoos on his face so I don't got to be all extra like faux extra and be all extra gangster and aggressive online might be cooler most of the time having real [ __ ] conversation with people and be trying to tell a lot of the young men to live a little bit different and be more positive i don't got to be all extraed out cuz the [ __ ] that's really savages that really be on there they ain't got to do all that cuz your reputation speaks for itself [ __ ] done seen what's going on with me already we hear about you soal knocking [ __ ] out we ain't see it though [ __ ] see me push [ __ ] to sleep [ __ ] you acting like me and I'm the one that be knocking [ __ ] out i don't be going around really bragging about it talking about it i'm trying to tell y'all bro there's levels to this [ __ ] i'm not taking nothing from him maybe he did but it's just hard to uh all the way believe it cuz a lot of [ __ ] can't see it we're just going off your word of mouth [ __ ] has seen me one hand recording putting [ __ ] to sleep [ __ ] you talking about [ __ ] you acting like me and I don't be acting all extra out [ __ ] you talking about i'm just keeping it 100 with you bro nothing against him i just keep it a ban bro nothing against homie F extra shout out to him i'm just saying you be a little extra out [ __ ] ain't really seen you on that we just hear about it but when you got Faze lined up like with King Pill you got every excuse in the book to why you don't want to fight the [ __ ] you say he a junkie he a fake gang maker but you in a county fighting a bunch of [ __ ] for free but Adam is trying to pay you [ __ ] to fight you don't want to fight that makes no sense to me it's something off with you at this point i'm just being real if you claim you running all these fays for free in the county risking getting other charges and [ __ ] and more time in jail why wouldn't you take a fade where you be actually paid off of it a influence of fate is you crazy this don't make no sense it was making me second guess have you really been running phase like that like I heard that you done got into it don't get me wrong b Brazie was talking about how y'all fought whatever i don't know if you was just ask extra dollars you be making the scene i'm just being 100 nothing against the homie i'm just being 100 i'm just being 100 nothing against the homie i'll box for extra i'll put some gloves on and box that [ __ ] i personally don't think for extra could beat me but ain't nothing against the homie though i'll box that [ __ ] especially if Adam was trying to pay what let's put some eight o gloves on and get it popping [ __ ] you talking about i'll box that [ __ ] anyways though what I'm getting at though not to get off subject what I'm getting at is when I got into with my construction boss I was already off of mass sirens and testosterone my mind was not right i really didn't mean to do that [ __ ] for real for real if you want me to keep it all way real with y'all cuz me and him was cool we just had a misunderstanding but he just thought I was weak because I always in person talk real low and quiet i'm a real outgoing smiling crack jokes sometimes type of dude that's why I stopped doing that because people take it for weakness i always played that role like the nice laid-back cool cal collected dude joke smile whatever he took it for weakness cuz he was always yell and scream at me and I never say nothing i'm like "All right bet i got you whatever whatever whatever." So he thought I was weak that's why he kept putting his hands with me a lot of y'all would have popped on him the first time he pushed you a lot of y'all would have like "Nigga you just put your hands on me." I let the [ __ ] push me three times I felt like a [ __ ] then when he said he was going to fizz remove I'm like "Hold on I can't just let this [ __ ] [ __ ] me now." It's like I ain't got no choice i really didn't even want to get get on it with him like that but I ain't had no choice after a while that's why I said I I now that I look back I should have just left when he told me to leave the first time and none of that would have happened could have been avoided but it is what it is so being on all that testosterone [ __ ] and being on C retention I'm being honest with you had me like it could have got me killed because I I was wilding low key bro i was wild it could have got me killed bro cuz I was wilding low key and I felt like to be honest with you I feel like it [ __ ] a lot of relationships a lot of relationships up with for me i'mma get to that but I was wilding 2000 and [ __ ] um 21 i was working at TOPS [ __ ] i was working at TOPS that specific year i knocked out six [ __ ] bro i was whing bro the one time I was we was at work it's 2021 it's when I had the locks and [ __ ] blasting testosterone blasting Sarms and then I used to take the [ __ ] on break too i didn't even tell yall that so I was taking more i was there taking a 100 [ __ ] testosterone pills a day on God on God on top of my because when when it came to lunch I would boot up so I could have more energy at work so when lunchtime came I eat take some creatin take some more testosterone take some SARS go smoke real quick and come clock back in like nothing happened so the one time at work this one dude came to the carry out and he was arguing with the one older lady and he called her a [ __ ] and I just felt like being on some bully [ __ ] like I just had to do it i don't know what was wrong with me i just had to do it i'm bugged out y got to understand this is me like literally a demon i was demonic a lot of people don't understand when I say that this [ __ ] is witchcraft i'm telling you for a fact this [ __ ] is witchcraft because remember what I told you different drugs and [ __ ] are governed by different spirits weed is governed by a specific spirit meth is why a lot of people I know that took meth said they was seeing demons and entities crack cocaine these is all portals to access to allow different spirits to access your body it's witchcraft so when I be saying I was a demon this [ __ ] is real deal real life remember I told y'all weed is demonic i seen it with my third eye so I'm on all these I'm on testosterone right and if testosterone make you super super super super angry right anger comes from the devil y'all got to follow what the [ __ ] I'm saying i don't know if y'all really getting what I'm saying make sure y'all double tap the screen make sure y'all like the live i can't be I can't be doing all this talking without getting some coffee i need y'all to follow me this [ __ ] is witchcraft now that I'm older I know this it's witchcraft this [ __ ] is rich excuse me witchcraft on my mama it is this [ __ ] is witchcraft different drugs summon different spirits listen if you super super super super super angry and you in a rage and you in a wrath that come from the devil [ __ ] is witchcraft i don't think yall really understanding this [ __ ] weed summons spirits it summons gins it summons demons so I would be at work i eat lunch i take more testosterone more SARS hurry up and go to the back of the building smoke and go back to work so the one day I'm at work and this is before my break the one dude called the one woman I was lying to [ __ ] this one older black lady always came there right i just had to knock him out so he started woofing at me cuz I ain't going to lie I start fake having an attitude and when he was ordering his food I start acting weird with him i'm like why he cussing this old lady out like why why you cussing this this old lady out like [ __ ] is wrong with him cuz this like I'm looking at like what if this was my mom he was talking to so when I went on break right I seen him in the parking lot and I don't know what it is that he seen in me but when he made eye contact me the [ __ ] started running and I honked him down and called him come here get your ass over here wahi was on my dead grandma i sent Jamila the video i sent me a little video and she was like "Oh my god you need to chill babe you going to go to jail you are wild and blah blah blah blah blah go your ass with the word chill out." I honked him down and mind you the crazy part is the lady that he had called a [ __ ] was right there when it happened i honked him down it's like he was against like the gate it's hard to explain it's like a gate over there and I start talking to him i'm like "Yo why you call that older woman a [ __ ] bro why you start whiling out on her you're a [ __ ] that's my age." He like "Oh bro." I waited till you start talking on purpose that's how I used to get [ __ ] i would talk to [ __ ] and as soon as [ __ ] start talking sneak [ __ ] cuz remember I told you a lot of [ __ ] don't know that the knockout is based off the element of surprise you got to surprise the [ __ ] you don't prepare them for it it's about the element of surprise a lot of [ __ ] don't know that and you put your body into it you put your back into it your legs your shoulder it just don't come from the arms it come from the legs it's called torque t O R K ask any boxing coach karate coach Muay Thai coach MMA coach they'll tell you kickboxing coach a lot of the power come from the legs the hips the core it's called torque t O R K and you put your body through it like my coach taught me you supposed to imagine yourself like punching a wall and trying to punch through the wall not just hit the [ __ ] and hurry up and retracting your hand no you try to lead they head with your fist you lead yeah torque that's a fact i spelled them wrong torque that's a fact so you're supposed to try to lead with it a lot of [ __ ] don't understand that's what caused the knockout when you lead with it and the brain shift and the fluid in the brain hits the skull that's what causes the knockout when you hit them and you drive with the punch you make their neck snap this why [ __ ] could die when you understand how serious violence is you could kill [ __ ] when you train it's very dangerous so you when you hit them you drive with it you drive with it you force the head to snap you drive in with it you don't just No you drive in with it you direct the head so when it snap the brain shake and the fluid in the brain hits the skull that's what causes the knockout so when I when I started asking him a question he didn't understand and I was recording i had this [ __ ] on video i was recording i just never showed you this video i believe I had it in my old iPhone but that iPhone was so old that was like a iPhone 7 y'all think it was a seven eight you know after a couple years them iPhone start [ __ ] up but I asked my "Yo why you call old lady a [ __ ] bro why you whing out on her bro what's wrong with you bro you good what why you call her that?" And as soon as she start talking and I learned some of that too from watching Mike Tyson studying the great Mike Tyson I just cracked him the [ __ ] fell in a corner and was sitting there like "Yo chill chill chill." So I asked him again i just start talking about "Yo bro why you do that?" And as soon as she start talking I start stomping his face in he bite you he in the corner sitting down looking up at me against the gate and I start talking the old lady right there as soon as he started talking I just kicked the [ __ ] right in this [ __ ] mouth bam start just kicking him in the face to the point old lady like "All right all right chill chill chill chill chill." And she started talking to him like "See this is what my nephews will do to you bro when you come talking crazy in this hood." Cuz that's the hood over there that's one of my customers and went back to work like nothing happened went back to work like nothing happened so that was one That was on break at work that I went and clocked back in and went back to work then there was another time I told you about this it was time for me to go on break went on break i'm smoking my little bowl it's like where I'm smoking my bowl it's like a little divide behind this and I guess it was some lady that like work at a medical medical field on the other side of the building I'm at i didn't know she was over there some dude rolled past on the bike and seen me smoking and then stopped and told her like "Yo it's some dude behind you trying to kidnap you trying to rape you trying to do some weird putting weird [ __ ] on my name i'm thinking I'm tripping this is why I tell you in public you shouldn't have earbuds in." I'm sitting here smoking minding my business bro about to go back to work this [ __ ] rides past me on the bike i didn't even know it was somebody on the other side of like the It's It's so hard to spot i'll have to show you if you got to get it but it's somebody on the other side of like the little divide some some white little nurse girl she's smoking a cigarette he like "Yo somebody behind you trying to kidnap you he trying to do something to you he like he trying to rape you be careful." I come from behind the divide like "Yo you talking about me." He like "Yeah you [ __ ] yeah you i'm talking about you you on some weird [ __ ] [ __ ] you standing behind on the other side nigga." I just walked up i'm like "Are you talking about me?" [ __ ] said "Yeah bing." Knocked him out right off the bite kicked him in his face like two times walked away wah my dead grandma i didn't even record that and went back to work who the [ __ ] you talking you talking to me yeah i'm like he [ __ ] up by letting me walk towards him because I was possessed by the devil back then bro a lot of people don't understand I was still living my life for darkness like I used to feed off of violence cuz the demonic spirit in you I understand feeds off negativity i don't think yall really understanding what I'm saying the demonic spirit in you when you poss when you're literally possessed it's like it's feing like how you be feing to eat food is feing for negative energy it's feeding for demonic energy it's like a food source i don't think people understand like a lot of people that that that been possessed they don't be telling y'all how that [ __ ] really feel it's a overwhelming type feeling i can't believe I was lowkey even living like that for real for real it's a overwhelming feeling because this is why in Islam they call them flesh eating spirits cuz it eat away at your energy it eat away at your flesh that's why you ever see people that do voodoo and santia or juju magic whatever a lot of times they body be depleted they look real skinny they face be sunken in cuz they dealing with these flesh eating spirits i'm telling you they dealing with these flesh-eating spirits it depletes your energy so I would like the reason why I popped on him cuz he made it seem like I was trying to kidnap this woman like I was trying to rape this woman and the whole time [ __ ] you don't understand [ __ ] one of my younger sisters got raped [ __ ] I don't play no [ __ ] like that some things you can't allow to get put on your name as a man i'm like "Bro what you on bro you saying I'm trying to rape her i'm trying to kidnap what the [ __ ] is you talking about?" I'm like "You talking about me?" He like "Yeah." When he seen me walking up towards him mind you he on the bike he just standing there though talking he should have just rolled off or like jumped off the bike he let me walk up to him and as soon as I got close to him it was just a reaction i'm trying to rape somebody [ __ ] cuz if you was in jail if you was in a county or you was in prison and you was in the feds and [ __ ] put some allegation like that on your name or they call you a [ __ ] a [ __ ] a [ __ ] they say suck my dick whatever and you don't do nothing the whole jail going to bully you after that [ __ ] i'm warning you [ __ ] going to [ __ ] you it's going to be you going to have a hard time and they going to [ __ ] you some things you got to stand on business about that's why I told you never let a man a young person put the word [ __ ] in his mouth even if y'all playing or joking call you a [ __ ] call you a ho ass [ __ ] call you a [ __ ] none of that [ __ ] bro those is fighting words that's just how it is bro those are fighting words so I just knocked his ass off the bike went back to work i'm trying to explain to y'all how bugged out I was being on all this testosterone i'm not just going to tell you the pros like all these punk ass fake ass [ __ ] that y'all watch on YouTube and [ __ ] and think they being real with y'all i'm not going to sit here and regurgitate the same information that these [ __ ] ass [ __ ] telling y'all make sure y'all like the lie cuz I'm a realist i'm not just going to sit up here and tell y'all that it's just all peaches and cream and it was just super super funny and easy no cuz that [ __ ] had me more demonic i'mma tell you the real [ __ ] that should have me [ __ ] demonic and evil i'm pro I promise you're my mama and then when you understand the secrets behind tattoos and [ __ ] bro how tattoos are literally portals to allow different spirits to take over you this is why in Islam we don't believe in getting tattoos when you understand the secret behind it that's why I said a lot of y'all really don't know what's going on but only the conscious chosen ones really get what I'm saying tattoos are literal portals and depending on what tattoos you got going on it can manifest a spirit to take over your goddamn body [ __ ] don't understand this [ __ ] this [ __ ] is spiritual tattoos are portals they open certain [ __ ] realms certain gateways they portals on top of I'm allowing these spirits to have access to my body because I'm smoking weed i'm taking testosterone which I told you testosterone and starts increase your anger so what do you think that's connecting you with dark demonic evil entities the devil so the one time it's like 5 in the morning i'm on my way to work i never forget I got to be to work at like 7 i'm on my way to work i'm on a train so this the third victim i'm on a train this big ass [ __ ] sitting in front of me right and he just mean mugging me right i'm trying to be on some cruise [ __ ] i'm like maybe something wrong with this [ __ ] like there's a lot of mental health patience here it's a lot of crazy people here i'm just want to try i'm like maybe something wrong with this [ __ ] like whatever this [ __ ] on some goofy [ __ ] [ __ ] just mugging like maybe something just wrong with him this [ __ ] look crazy as hell i'm trying my best not to look at this [ __ ] but mind you I'm on the train we're the only one on the train bro i honestly feel like I was being gangstar but I don't know maybe it's just a random bugged out ass [ __ ] who the [ __ ] knows i'm sitting there i already don't feel like going to work he come and sit right in front of me and just mugging what the [ __ ] wrong with this [ __ ] bro what's wrong with this [ __ ] so I could keep him 100 with you i did some [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] you probably like some [ __ ] [ __ ] i did some [ __ ] [ __ ] as soon as the train got to my stop [ __ ] the door open i waited like one second i stood up and just cracked the [ __ ] bing [ __ ] tried to get up hit the [ __ ] like two more time beep beep [ __ ] dropping a herp and ran off the train and went to work [ __ ] was sitting there i heard him got off the train ran to [ __ ] work wah he [ __ ] my heart was [ __ ] beat i'm like [ __ ] [ __ ] cuz there's a [ __ ] police station right across the street where I did that [ __ ] at the police station is right there the fourth victim i was getting off of work right and I seen this one [ __ ] that tried to bully me in 2014 when I still was skinny as hell it was this one [ __ ] on the bus acting drunk as hell saying he just got out of prison he was already big as [ __ ] right i'm with my nephew i was already wearing man bags back then right so he got on the bus on some tough ass [ __ ] this light-skinned [ __ ] right and he come to sit by my nephew and he mean mugging me and my nephew he start talking crazy bro he start talking crazy as [ __ ] with Lahi on my diagram and start violating i'm talking about some old you a [ __ ] you got this little man bag and all this other [ __ ] that's some [ __ ] [ __ ] my generation ain't weird [ __ ] like that then he's standing up over me talking crazy me and my nephew looking like me and my nephew both got [ __ ] pocketk knives on us so I'm I'm having dialogue with him but I ain't really argu [ __ ] you like you in some weird [ __ ] homie mind you we're on our way to work i'm like "What's wrong with this [ __ ] he's violating on the bus violating." So I started standing on business i'm like "Yo [ __ ] [ __ ] that." My mom I'mma poke this [ __ ] this [ __ ] don't even know who he talking to [ __ ] i'mma stab the [ __ ] out you ain't no We don't play fair over here i'm like "All right bro." We start woofing at each other then he sit down he start like like like he was trying to psych do psychological warfare and like he talking all this [ __ ] then he sit down act like nothing just happened acting all calm this is 2004 so I'm trying to explain to her how I don't forget faces so mind 2015 16 17 18 19 20 21 seven years later I see this [ __ ] at the train station i don't forget faces he looking washed up now is you hearing me [ __ ] look washed up washed the [ __ ] up i'm in a train station i got a [ __ ] pocket knife pocket knife on me this dumb ass [ __ ] walks up to me mind you I'm already possessed by a demonic spirit i feel it cuz I know when that [ __ ] would take over my body cuz my heart to get the beat and my adrenaline get the shaking i know when that [ __ ] to take over me this [ __ ] walks up to me tomorrow do you got $5 before I could get on the bus this is This is after I'm already on YouTube i start whing on him mind you I'm big as hell now this ain't this I know who you are [ __ ] you tried me [ __ ] in 2014 when I was skinn as hell little as I told you the older [ __ ] back then used to be on some bully [ __ ] they didn't [ __ ] with the Yans like I do them [ __ ] was bullying the Yianns i was a Y at the time like 18 17 he already in his late 20s so when I seen him when I got older I never forgot how he violated me on the bus and was call trying to call me gay and call me a faggus had a man bag i never forgot that [ __ ] i'm like "Oh bet i'm a faggot." All right you going to eat them words [ __ ] bet we on this federal ass bus you trying to get [ __ ] booked to go to jail [ __ ] on some hot [ __ ] when his cameras on this bus the bus driver will call 12 in a heartbeat all right bet so I'm at the train station he come up to me yo you got $5 well I hear my dead grandma broad daylight it's like 2:00 in the afternoon 3:00 in the afternoon i just got off of work i backed out my pocketk knife right i'm like "Nigga who the [ __ ] is you talking to [ __ ] who the [ __ ] you And I swung it at him on purpose almost touched his neck on purpose i really could have I really could have sliced his neck open for real for real but I was on some studio [ __ ] and I purposely swung this [ __ ] towards his neck like get the [ __ ] away from me [ __ ] who the [ __ ] is you talking to [ __ ] you said what he confused and he started running out the trench he's like "Yo what you want bro what you want bro what you doing bro what you want yo some weird shit." So I ran outside the train station where he at i got the knife in my [ __ ] hand basically like this and I'm squaring up and I'm like "What's up [ __ ] what up?" And I ran up on him again and swung it again and the [ __ ] bounced back cuz a [ __ ] tried to violate me bro it's a long story call me some real disrespectful type name [ __ ] tried to violate me i'm I'm I'mma tell you about that that's why I tell you you shouldn't be a bully [ __ ] tried to violate me i'm telling y'all but I ended up getting a blade on the [ __ ] right the second time so some old I told some old ass [ __ ] right he start sitting there recording me right so now my attention is off the [ __ ] that tried to bully me this [ __ ] start trying to [ __ ] record me he keeps like in his 30s his 40s right so I'm like "Bro hold on." So I turn to the dude recording right and I'm walking up to him i'm like "Yo bro [Music] why soon start talking?" I lowkey felt bad but at the at the time it is what it is bro [ __ ] it it is what the [ __ ] it is crack this [ __ ] wahi wahi on my dead grandma wahi word wah the [ __ ] eyes started rolling smacked and hit the concrete and I took his phone and broke it then this old lady not really older but this lady that was in like her 30s or 40s she started screaming and acting weird to she going to call the police and I respect this one OG that was there he was like "Yo mind your business." Cuz you don't know what them young [ __ ] got going on it could be some street [ __ ] that [ __ ] he pulled the knife out on could have killed his brother his mama his his girl his kid these young [ __ ] got no [ __ ] going on in these streets mind your business don't call 12 you see what he just did to this [ __ ] recording mind your business i told you that [ __ ] so then as I started walking back up to the [ __ ] that tried to bully me in 2014 the big ass light-skinned [ __ ] he washed up now he like washed up out of shape look like a drunk now he want to start woofing why you knock him out why you do that to him do it to me do it to me knock me out now he got all this energy woofing i'm your brother i see you again [ __ ] i'mma kill your ass and I started running cuz then you could hear the police siren was coming way down the street and that's how I lost my friendship with my boy M shout out to my boy M cuz M i remember all this [ __ ] m but I was on the phone with him that was one of my day one he's like "Bro I can't [ __ ] with you no more you know you're always going to be my brother you know I always going to love you bro you know we've been through a lot of [ __ ] together but I can't [ __ ] with you no more bro i got two kids now you hot every time I turn around you getting into a fight and call me to come pick you up bro I can't [ __ ] with you no more after this and I respected at first when he was telling me I was a little upset i'm not going to lie i was a little upset i'm not going to lie but now that I look back at it M was already like 31 32 back then i was only like 24 25 he was obvious he was like "Bro you too hot bro your ass hot." Then I got to understand he had just got a job through the city driving like the little metro bus and [ __ ] he was doing his [ __ ] he was on some grown man [ __ ] make sure y'all double tap the screen but make sure I like the live i got to respect i'm trying to explain to how seed retention has a different effect on everybody it has a different effect on everybody i'm just keeping the throat i'm just keeping it 100 so my mom was like "Yo bro I can't [ __ ] with you no more bro you too hot bro you got too much [ __ ] going on so that's the fit he wasn't even supposed to get it he was just wrong place wrong [ __ ] time he was just wrong place wrong [ __ ] time so then at tops right that year I just kept running to [ __ ] i end up running to this one [ __ ] i didn't put hands on him though i was about to i end up running into this one [ __ ] that was trying to be on some weird flirtatious [ __ ] with my ex-girlfriend but me and her got broke up we stopped talking i seen him while I was at work i gave him a pass cuz I told him I was going to get on his ass cuz he was at this [ __ ] little get together with her family and [ __ ] this one [ __ ] was face trying to push up on my shorty while I was there then me and her just ended up dipping but I kept his face I kept his face in my They did some weird [ __ ] bro like they thought I was sleep on the couch and he was fake like trying to get at her and I woke up and I faked hopped on [ __ ] in here but I'm like we out i end up seeing him at Tops he was working for like a little vendors that bring like the Pepsi the Coca-Cola whatever and I seen him whatever he was about to be my fifth victim but then after that I end up seeing the [ __ ] that put his hands on my [ __ ] sister [ __ ] this [ __ ] ass [ __ ] that put his hands on my sister this [ __ ] was right in line buying something with his back turned he ain't lying buying something just standing there [ __ ] I'm on the phone with J i'm like "Yo I think this the [ __ ] that put his hands on my sister i think Hold on this is this nigga." I was on the phone with her while I fought the [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] wasn't lying [ __ ] i swear to God on my damn grandma the [ __ ] Men leak [ __ ] ass male leak you know what's going on he's a [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] i end up seeing Men leak he ain't [ __ ] lying mind you he [ __ ] my younger sister Ya permanently for life i end up seeing Men leak in line ran down that [ __ ] i hit this dumb ass [ __ ] when I hit him he like stumbled then I instantly put him in a rear naked choke and start rag dolling this [ __ ] raggalling this [ __ ] his man jumped in and hit me boom ate that [ __ ] hit me like two or three times boom i'm still choking this [ __ ] then mentally girlfriend at the time start hitting me boom she hit me i'm rad darling cuz my adrenaline is pumping so I don't even feel it literally the mentally girlfriend pull out mace and start macing me i just start closing my eyes and [ __ ] but I'm still rag dolling this [ __ ] so mad people at the store start trying to break it up i'm like "Yo bro come outside come check it out come outside bro come check it out you hit my sister right fight me [ __ ] come check it out pop out you You fought my sister right fight her brother come check it out [ __ ] come check it out fight her brother you fought my sister right you was man up to fight my sister be man up to fight her brother pop outside yo pop outside we outside here's my fifth he's standing there like this he just look defeated in the face he's just standing there like next to 12 cousin 12 coming i had to get up out of there left work didn't even get fired the boss asked me what happened i just kept it real with him i'm like "Shit that [ __ ] fought my sister bro." It was just a reaction [ __ ] fought my sister it was a reaction [ __ ] i don't know what you want me to tell you [ __ ] put his hands on my sister so when I seen him [ __ ] it was what it was homie it is what it is the [ __ ] [ __ ] my sister eye socket up my sister had to get surgery in her eye all that so [ __ ] when I seen him it was just a reaction i just kept it real i'm like "Y'all want to fire me fire me nigga." But at the end of the day it is what it is bro [ __ ] [ __ ] my sisters that's why I knew I couldn't keep working at that tops bro because I told y'all how some of them witches came up and told me like "Yo you got a spirit of death on you i don't think you should be working here." And then months later the store get shot up come on bro i can't make this [ __ ] up but what I'm getting at is the whole moral of the story is what I was telling you is if you on sea retention and then you on testosterone that [ __ ] will amplify who you is i was more of a younger man back then i was still learning to control that [ __ ] energy that [ __ ] can make you go crazy it can make or break you i didn't really have control over it for for I didn't have control over the rage now I start feeling angry i start feeling rage i start controlling it more cuz I know that's the ego it just took years of experience now I'll be on some more like whatever like if my girl in the m just going to text her back i just get off the phone i'm not about to get into the ego i'm telling you the cons of this [ __ ] i see some of these dudes videos i was just watching one of these dudes videos on TikTok this is why I say I can't really believe a lot of [ __ ] that these [ __ ] be saying i feel like it's just regurgitated information cuz you [ __ ] only want to talk about the pros i never hear you [ __ ] talk about the cons i hear you [ __ ] talk about the pros you feel me Noel i don't ever hear you [ __ ] talk about the cons though [ __ ] so I'm going to be real and tell you the cons that they have for me cuz I don't see nobody else doing that [ __ ] i'm just being real with you i hear everybody talking about the pros the pros oh the energy the woman attraction why don't tell [ __ ] the flip side why you don't tell [ __ ] the flip side i'm I'mma wait for a second my own tell the flip side y'all want to talk about all the pros why don't the flip side then remember I told you I personally feel like the [ __ ] made me lose a couple good relations that I had with some good women cuz my temper was so bad bro and now I look back in time and I realize that Allah had blessed me with a couple good women but I was out of my mind my temper was so [ __ ] bad that I pushed them away when they really could do nothing wrong these was genuine good real solid authentic women and I pushed a lot of them away by being super super negative i pushed a lot of them away and then in 2021 this time my ex Maya ended up coming to Buffalo i'm chilling with her right and I scared her by accident and she got mad at me and wasn't talking to me for two weeks while she was here because this this one [ __ ] she bought weed from he end up walking her he sold her some CBD the [ __ ] was fake so I told her I'm like "Yo take me to the nigga." She didn't even know what I was about to do so she took me to the [ __ ] right we inside his house he had mad money on him i just yoke the [ __ ] up i'm like "Yo give me that [ __ ] [ __ ] run your pockets right now let me get that [ __ ] what else what else you got in this house where we at [ __ ] give me that shit." I took everything from him then I did then Mah got mad at me and stopped talking for like two weeks she was like "Yo you told me that you changed and you was different from what you was back in the day i seen the old you coming up then you could have put me in danger doing that [ __ ] to that [ __ ] you don't know if that [ __ ] had a gun or anything he could have shot me and you could have killed you in front of me like you violent still cuz I was wondering why she wasn't texting back or answering the phone [ __ ] was lowkey pushing her away cuz she don't like that type [ __ ] but it was just her reaction but that's why I say you can't just be going off of reactions because now you're being more emotional i wasn't being logical i wasn't being rational i was going off anger like a [ __ ] woman i wasn't being rational all I know is that she told me some [ __ ] walked through so my mind went blank i'm like "Go call that [ __ ] for some weed right now where you at?" Went right over to his building i'm like "Yo what you got instantly grabbed that [ __ ] [ __ ] let me get that [ __ ] if I knock your ass out of here let me get that [ __ ] money." Okay what else you got where that weed at give me all this weed [ __ ] and I told my like "We out." And then she got mad at me like "Hell no bro you still in the same [ __ ] you was when you was younger i can't be around you bro you wowing still." And I thought about like "Damn you right." Cuz I can't be around no [ __ ] like that you still in the same type [ __ ] cuz Maya a couple years older than me so she looked at it different she a woman she like "Nigga you put my safety in jeopardy doing that [ __ ] i didn't feel comfortable being around you after you did that you whing i didn't know you was going to do all that i thought you was just going to check the [ __ ] i didn't think you was going to rob the [ __ ] you're winging out here and I was barefaced broad daylight but what I'm getting at is that being young and playing with this [ __ ] grown ass energy thinking this [ __ ] is a joke thinking this [ __ ] is a game [ __ ] I was fooling myself cuz I kept thinking "Oh I got control over it i got control over myself." And I really didn't that's what I'm getting at i was super young trying to take on this stupid grown ass role dealing with all this energy thinking I got so much control over it and I really didn't i really didn't i didn't have no control over that [ __ ] i I I thought I had control over it i thought I was doing right but when [ __ ] would happen I realized I didn't have control over it i started seeing I have as much control over it as I thought i was fooling myself i thought I had that [ __ ] down packed no I didn't it took some years and years and years of learning how to start realizing the more you try to control it that [ __ ] control you you got to learn to just live with it it's hard to explain the more you try your best to control it it will start to consume you you just got to I wouldn't even say you got to take it hour by hour you just got to take it minute by minute i was trying too hard to control it and wasn't realizing that it was controlling me real [ __ ] that [ __ ] was controlling me i wasn't controlling it this is a part of the reason I moved out of Buffalo 2022 a lot of people don't know it ain't really had nothing to do with like no women or nothing like that i started getting into it again with [ __ ] so in 2022 I was cooling at my uncle house and this one white boy was over there i thought he was a hood ass real ass [ __ ] and I remember I was live talking to y'all i was in one of the different rooms in the building used to build their cooling smoke my aunt cooling and he knocked on the door while I was live and a lot of yall like don't understand like it's some part of alter ego when I be live the spirit take over me I can have no energy then get on live and have energy some part of alter ego it's really not me it's really not me doing it it's the spirit so when he knocked on the [ __ ] door I was that and I'm on live i'mma knock this [ __ ] out i already knew it a week later my uncle man came to the building and recognized him mind you he just did like 30 years in jail for murder he recognized him and he pulled me outside he was like "Yo bro that [ __ ] was locked up with me." I'm like "What's good with him?" Like when we ran his paperwork he was locked up for sexually assaulted like a 12-year-old instead of like 13 and under so it it was it was she could have been 12 11 10 9 but he was in there on sex charges and but in so many words he told me handle that i said that so I was about to go to the gym one of the days i was leaving my uncle house it was early morning i'm going to come back later i'm about to go to the gym i'm like "All right bet so I'm leaving out my uncle house the gangster white boy he walking up the street towards my uncle i'm on FaceTime my ex Jamaa i'm like "Oh Jamea watch this." I flip the camera i walk to him i'm like "Yo bro what's good with it?" He tried to shake my hand like "What's good with it bro?" I'm like "Why you ain't telling me you had like sex charges against a kid?" He like "What you talking about?" I start tapping his shoulder while I'm talking to him that's where he [ __ ] up at and let me touch him i'm like "Why you ain't telling me you have rape charges?" Because mind you right where my uncle house was it was a school right up the street like right at the corner and he's technically not supposed to be over there because his kids over there and he got those charges on the sex offender list as soon as he started talking and spewing that [ __ ] to me just took off on him the [ __ ] dropped and got up and tried to run i told you this [ __ ] i'm on FaceTime then I ran down on him i was behind him and cracked him one more time the [ __ ] fell face forward and smacked his face on the [ __ ] concrete and started screaming to him help he another [ __ ] wahi when I hit the [ __ ] the first time I watched his eyes roll on the drop and then got up and just start trying to run start trying to run i ran right behind him come [Music] here fool drop face smack the cocker he leak into help the police right there i walked away like nothing happened cuz I'm like "Nigga you got sex offender charges." So then this is why my uncle wouldn't allow me to come over his house no more then around that time I was getting ready to move out of Buffalo i'm like damn this was the little chill spot me going to my uncle house damn so I go to my [ __ ] uncle house i left some food in the refrigerator his man is over there this [ __ ] like this tall big as hell i go in the refrigerator and my food my food gone all I did was politely ask his friend "Yo did you eat my food?" And he started whining you should have [ __ ] laughed in the refrigerator [ __ ] that's your [ __ ] fault [ __ ] instantly took off on him dropped his big ass called my cousin Wayne on FaceTime and showed him the [ __ ] laying on the [ __ ] floor the [ __ ] [ __ ] called the police on me then my uncle start "Yo don't put my nephew in jail bro." like don't put my nephew like you wild so when the police came they was asking did something happen we both at the door he like nah ain't [ __ ] happen i'm like nah ain't no fight happen like we good so I end up respecting him but I went to fight or flight cuz that big ass [ __ ] was in the kitchen and he started getting hyped up and came towards me and started screaming so in the middle of him screaming he was just reacting like "What the [ __ ] [ __ ] is you talking about?" Dropped his big ass then my uncle was on some [ __ ] like "Bro you can't be over here bro like you my nephew you know I [ __ ] with you bro you causing problems at my house bro you just fought my man bro i didn't even know you [ __ ] was in the kitchen fighting." I'm like "Bro I left my food in the refrigerator bro [ __ ] touch my food nigga." But you can't be doing that at my house bro you wilding bro you bringing heat to my house bro this [ __ ] ended up calling the police to my house over some [ __ ] you did so I'm like you know what bro bet i'm out of here say less oh I knew I had a sixth victim in 2021 before I get to that cuz that's that's technically the seventh one in 2021 I was on the block the one time live on YouTube freestyling rapping i knew I forgot somebody it was getting dark as hell it was like the end of 1 in the morning i had a yellow bike with my cousin Charlie one of the apes shout out to my cousin Charlie i'm with another one of the homies we freestyling we ra the block be cooling i'm like "Yo it's getting late i'm about to just take my bike hop on the train cuz the train run all through the city." Like I'm about to just hop on hop on the bike hop on the train real quick i'mma book it on the bike we go to the train station my cousin Charlie didn't tell me that this one [ __ ] at the train station was his op over a [ __ ] i had no idea so we standing in front of the train station door the train don't come to like another 10 15 minutes we smoking and [ __ ] come outside the train station and just stand there looking at my cousin like just looking at him him and my cousin start going back and forth right so my cousin going back and forth to the [ __ ] next my cousin just walked up to the [ __ ] and punched the [ __ ] and the [ __ ] fell into the door so he start screwing on my cousin my this is my blood cousin they like a year or two younger than me but this is blood this is family no this is the [ __ ] sixth victim i knew I forgot about the seventh one yeah this is all in 2021 so as he scramled on my cousin I got a police taser i had a police taser at the time that I paid like $6700 for a real good police taser i used to carry that [ __ ] with me everywhere I went like these [ __ ] ass [ __ ] just [ __ ] fighting and not calling my cousin a [ __ ] as a [ __ ] squinting up my cousin I just pulled the tas and walked up to the [Music] [ __ ] hit the [ __ ] with the taser he fell into the door you shaking this [ __ ] this is like the more you pull the trigger the more the [ __ ] is getting electrocuted then I took the cartridge out then my cousin hit the [ __ ] again then the [ __ ] he started saying some [ __ ] then he ended up running the train station i'm like "Yo bro I kept out of my I'm" I'm like "Bro I'm out this [ __ ] might have a gun or some shit." I hurried up and just left i got up out of there cuz me in the morning like "Bro did you shoot this nigga?" I'm like "No [ __ ] that was a taser." He was like "I was about to say." I'm like "This [ __ ] Jay's Wilding it's a police station right across the street." I'm like "Nah [ __ ] that was a taser nigga." So that was the sixth victim in 2021 i'm wilding the seventh one happened cuz the same cousin Charlie we was at work and this [ __ ] spit on him he was arguing with his one op at the store the [ __ ] spitting my cousin face so my manager Dave already was knowing that I was violent at the job remember I told you he knew I fought my sister boyfriend so Dave came to me in the carry he was like "Yo listen somebody just spitting your cousin i don't want you to react bro we just going to call the police whatever." I'm like "Oh tell C to come here." So my cousin came to the car i'm like "What happened?" He was like "Bro I was outside pushing the curse and [ __ ] bro collected the curse i get into a verbal war option they just spit on my face." And I'm like "You [ __ ] let him you just let him spit on you and walk away you let him all right bro." I'm like "What the [ __ ] was wearing?" But I manifested this [ __ ] when I got off of work right i hop on the bike to the train station cuz I know every all the little gangsters or whatever be at the train station i'm on one side of the tracks the [ __ ] that spit on my cousin I recognize him cuz my cousin told me exactly what he was wearing he's on the other train and he going towards downtown so I'm like "Oh." I goes to that other side and I'm waiting for the train i'm waiting for the train to take him back towards downtown so I got to wait like 10 15 minutes so the other train come i'm on a bike cruising downtown and I see the [ __ ] [ __ ] I called my cousin Charlie i mean where you at he like I'm at home i said [ __ ] get your ass [ __ ] downtown right now this a G-c [ __ ] on the hood get your ass downtown right now if you don't fight this [ __ ] [ __ ] your ass will be the DP i'mma tell all the apes all the homies at the blood all the bloods at the next pow that you let somebody do something because in when you blood it's mandatory that if somebody do something to you retaliate it's mandatory you have to I'm like "Yo get your ass downtown right now i don't give a [ __ ] if you at home [ __ ] if you don't get your ass downtown I literally told him I'm going to hop on [ __ ] with you [ __ ] and this is little cuz I'm like I'm going to hop on [ __ ] with you [ __ ] get the [ __ ] down right now i see the [ __ ] that split on you hurry the [ __ ] up [ __ ] he like better so tell me why the [ __ ] I'm following [ __ ] he don't even know that I'm on his ass he go to somebody like eye appointment somebody like eye doctor i'm sitting outside the building for like 30 45 minutes then he walk out he walk back towards the train as he's walking back towards the train my cousin is on the train that's coming towards downtown and the [ __ ] waiting for the other train to come back towards the university he's standing there and my cousin gets off the train i'm like "Ain't the [ __ ] you said spit on you?" He said "Yeah." I said "We going to jump this [ __ ] off this [ __ ] the [ __ ] is wrong with you nigga?" So I'm not going to lie my cousin did some gangster [ __ ] we walking towards the [ __ ] i'm on the left side he on the right side i got mad this day my [ __ ] cousin soon as he walked towards the [ __ ] he like "Yo you got a cigarette?" The [ __ ] stopped my cousin hit him fast the [ __ ] fell towards my way i tried to hit him and [ __ ] missed then the [ __ ] fell into me start acting like he trying to slam me or some [ __ ] i start hitting him [ __ ] fell on the ground he start stumping his ass [ __ ] ass [ __ ] on blood [ __ ] ass [ __ ] the [ __ ] wrong with you so some older dude some older dude start recording yeah this the seventh victim some older dude start recording we stumping this [ __ ] out this the seventh victim [ __ ] ass [ __ ] [ __ ] cuz I'm already mad that I missed my punch it's like I hit him but I kind of missed i didn't get the full like it was so perfect the way it's cuz my cous hit him he stumbled my way and then I like hit him but I missed kind of it's hard to explain i didn't get the full impact so I was already mad i was already pissed the [ __ ] off cuz I couldn't get the full impact on this [ __ ] so he on the ground we stunking this [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] [ __ ] wrong with you left the [ __ ] le weak so some black [ __ ] hey hey hey get off i'm going to call the police i walk right up to this older black [ __ ] i said "Mind your business put that phone away if I knock you the [ __ ] out next." [ __ ] put this phone away and walked away and me and C got on the train we got on the train we smoking on the like "See [ __ ] that's how we handle [ __ ] [ __ ] don't nobody spit on my blood [ __ ] don't nobody spit on my blood cuz the [ __ ] wrong with you [ __ ] he laughing like "Nigga your ass is brains." I'm like "Yeah don't nobody spit on my [ __ ] cousin [ __ ] wrong with you?" We end up getting out of there so when we end up going to the train station and they got hit with the taser I didn't know cuz was beefing with him over his [ __ ] his [ __ ] was cheating with this [ __ ] so 2022 2022 after I fought the [ __ ] at my uncle house my cousin called me and make it seem like he just want to get some weed right he lied to me i don't like a liar he made it seem like he just want to get some weed and I knew something was off cuz I'm like "Bro it's all these areas in the hood we can get weed from." Mine's about to call [ __ ] why do you want to go all the way in Riverside i'm not from over Riverside bro he want to go to verbside right he didn't tell me that his girl was on a bus with the same [ __ ] who just hit with the taser in 2021 the summertime this is summertime 2022 so his girl get off the bus with the [ __ ] so I see the plan my old cousin call me here to fight but wouldn't tell me this song so I'm mad at the [ __ ] so mind you this is victim number nine within a year i'm mad at C cuz though I'm like "Bro this [ __ ] didn't even tell me." But I waited till afterward so C start fighting the [ __ ] i jump in cuz we both blood i jump and start hitting the [ __ ] we jumping the [ __ ] off this dumb ass [ __ ] so the [ __ ] tries to like slam me almost and I'm backing up but I popped out my [ __ ] shoe and I end up [ __ ] up my left toe i popped out my [ __ ] shoe so as this [ __ ] trying to slam me cuz sitting there talking to his [ __ ] i'm like "Nigga help me what the [ __ ] is you doing [ __ ] [ __ ] wrong with you this is your beef at the minute [ __ ] help me." So then Cuz ran back over there he grabbed the [ __ ] throw him to the ground i heard him put my shoe back on i didn't realize I [ __ ] my toe cuz my adrenaline was pumping we sitting here stomping this [ __ ] ass [ __ ] [ __ ] wrong with you [ __ ] wrong with you [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] who the [ __ ] here broad daylight at the [ __ ] bus station in front of all these damn people the [ __ ] on the ground just landed with mad blood but he took it like a geo cuz he end up getting up not too long after that get up out of here the car is sitting there talking to his [ __ ] i ain't even mean to call her a [ __ ] but I wild out on her i'm like "Nigga you gota be fighting over this [ __ ] you got me fighting over this [ __ ] nigga." Cuz she talking to another [ __ ] you didn't even tell me [ __ ] and I hopped on [ __ ] because I caught myself i'm like "Nigga you tell me when the [ __ ] you going to do some [ __ ] [ __ ] you see I'm here for you you see I'm lying for you [ __ ] but you tell me [ __ ] you don't walk me into no [ __ ] blindsided my [ __ ] you don't do that [ __ ] bro you [ __ ] tell me what the [ __ ] is wrong with you and I'm like in his face but I'm older cuz I got a higher rank than him and he know I'm solid and I'm just keeping it 100 with him i'm like "Yo bro you don't [ __ ] bring me into no [ __ ] like this bro you [ __ ] tell me nigga." I'm like "What the [ __ ] [ __ ] i thought we was just coming to get some weed nigga." I'm like "Brother [ __ ] you tell me nigga." Like "What the [ __ ] appreciate you Peaceless." I'm like "What the fuck?" Cuz you tell me bro you don't [ __ ] lead me into no [ __ ] like that bro we supposed to be family bro you give me the heads up so I feel that my toe is [ __ ] i'm like "Nigga help me [ __ ] get up out of here nigga." So I put my arm around cuz we skipping up the [ __ ] street l like skip i'm like hell no 91 12 pull up like 10 cars pull up we way up the street i call the [ __ ] Uber then I start laughing with C cuz I'm like cuz my bad bro we smoking up for the Uber i'm like "Bro my bad." But you got to tell me bro you can't just lead me into [ __ ] blindsided [ __ ] i had no idea you was doing this [ __ ] bro and mind a lot of people understand why was you wilding like this cuz [ __ ] I was mad [ __ ] when I found out my mom got sick that's what [ __ ] don't understand i was super angry [ __ ] i just keep it real with y'all [ __ ] cuz I wasn't in my right mind at first cuz I knew something was going on in my mind but I didn't officially get told it until like 2022 towards August that's why I had cut my locks i knew something was going on with my mom health i knew it was deteriorating so I was like lowkey more pissed the [ __ ] off [ __ ] i'm be real with y'all i was lowkey more like I was just angry be real with y'all and I'm trying to tell you how that C retention increased that anger i was just like angry at life i was just super super angry like damn bro i was just pissed the [ __ ] off so that's what the eighth victim the ninth i lose track i can't keep up with all these [ __ ] be honest with you i was just angry bro be real with you [ __ ] was just angry as hell [ __ ] keep it all 100 with you [ __ ] was just angry that's just what it was i was angry as hell [ __ ] was just angry bro that's what it is bro [ __ ] was just mad as hell like real deal was just I was I wasn't in the right mind so then fast And fast forward I'll never forget this when I realized I had to start calming down this is November of 2022 i'm at the [ __ ] gym this one [ __ ] [ __ ] that claimed he was a boxer recognized me from YouTube i'm doing pull-ups i never forget i'm minding my business i got all black on got my blue knight bag with me got the blicky in the bag i'm minding my [ __ ] business this [ __ ] come over to the puller bar just memeing me i'm like "What's wrong with this nigga?" So I'm like "I'm about to just walk away." So I walked away the [ __ ] we stumped that was like the ninth that was like the ninth now this is the 10th i'm I'm about to just walk away i go towards the bench press the [ __ ] follows me to the bench press and say "What the [ __ ] you looking at?" No I'm tripping this the 11th i'm tripping i told you I be forgetting some of these [ __ ] ass [ __ ] let me rewind a little bit 2022 i'm on my way to the [ __ ] Catalyst gym i'm on a bus and and I don't even get on public transportation cuz it be crazy people on there since it's like 6:00 7 in the morning i'm thinking I'm good i'm like I'm about to hop on the [ __ ] bus this the 10th [ __ ] right here i'm about to just hop on the [ __ ] bus [ __ ] that i knew I I told you I'd be forgetting some of these [ __ ] this is after that top shoot happened i I'll never forget i'm like "Okay it's super dark i'm just going to hop in a bus real quick this saved me money from getting Uber it's just $2 [ __ ] that i'm about to hop in a bus real quick [ __ ] it this is what happen when you take shortcuts bro i should just got in a [ __ ] Uber bro then my 10th one i honestly should have just um got an Uber like I said bro i'm on a bus i'm on the phone my cousin Daddy Day from Central Park shout out to my cousin Daddy from Central Park and this light-skinned ass [ __ ] i'm on the bus it's nobody on the No I'm forgetting this the 11th one cuz I forgot this is why I don't get on the bus i told you I be forgetting [ __ ] now I got to rewind again i got to go to [ __ ] January and February 2022 i forgot i told you I be forgetting [ __ ] bro is this the 11th [ __ ] i be forgetting no the 11th one was what I'm about to explain this the 10th one on a [ __ ] bus it's only me and this whole ass [ __ ] on the bus this [ __ ] came this big ass black [ __ ] came and sat right next to me to the point where he could touch my leg it's a mad seats on the bus and he's just staring i'm like "Bro what what's wrong with you bro you good?" He start talking crazy took off on him just started beating him i had to hurt her to get off the [ __ ] bus you remember this one i told you about this one i had to [ __ ] run up the [ __ ] street to the cut call a [ __ ] no I had to text my ex Jama Uber cuz my adrenaline was pumping too much and she like "What the [ __ ] happened it's like 7 in the morning." I'm like "Yo just give me a whoop at this specific location i got to get up out of here i'm about to go to jail heard me give me an Uber got up out of there so I already knew better about getting on public transportation cuz it's weirdos in New York on these [ __ ] buses and trains so I don't [ __ ] with that [ __ ] that's why I rather just get a Uber that's like the what 10th [ __ ] i'm like I rather just get a Uber the [ __ ] [ __ ] godamn so fast forward cuz I had forgot about him i forgot all about that [ __ ] so this is summertime 20 what's the what's it 2022 I try to be slick and get on the bus again super super early I haven't been on the bus in like 8 9 months I'm like it was like 6 7 in the morning ain't going to be nobody on the bus it's only $2 to take me right in front of the gym I'm like [ __ ] [ __ ] it [ __ ] a Uber I'm going to save some money shouldn't have did that gets on the bus this white-skinn ass [ __ ] get on the come and sit right next to me right i'm just looking the opposite way whatever i'm on the phone my cousin D every time I'm turning to my right he just all up in my grill and [ __ ] acting weird as hell the [ __ ] is wrong with this goofy ass [ __ ] he all in my grill just staring like "Here we go again." He start woofing talking crazy cuz I'm looking back at him so he stood up like he towering over me and started talking crazy so I pulled out the pimp blade like "Yo what you trying to do?" He like "Put the knife down [ __ ] put the knife down." I'm going to phone my cousin baby on FaceTime i'm like "All right bet." I dropped the knife i put my [ __ ] phone down the way I am right now he's standing towards the front of the bus and I just ran towards him like "What's up?" I never forget this it's like it was moving slow motion i start doing a peekab-boo style like Mike Tyson as I'm going towards him right he at the front of the bus right where it's like a little a small little walkway i will never forget this [ __ ] i'm going towards this [ __ ] like this like when something I swear to God I'm my dead grandma the [ __ ] towards in front of us as I get close to him I'm like this this [ __ ] is looking at me like "Oh shit." I seen the look in his eye the [ __ ] swam and I dug under the [ __ ] and hit the [ __ ] and the [ __ ] fell it's like the bus driver opened the door [ __ ] fell off the [ __ ] bus i catch him i swear to God I was doing a peekab-boo Mike Tyson [ __ ] i'm just going towards him like "What's up what's up?" The [ __ ] looking at me on some crazy [ __ ] as I'm walking towards him but he don't know this is the Mike Tyson peekaboo style and most people only can practice the people who start they short that [ __ ] is for shorter fighters i'm taller i [ __ ] come under hit him [ __ ] fell back he jump off the [ __ ] bus i hop off the bus he rushed me tried to slam me i put him in a choke hole i th down to the [ __ ] floor started beating him they called the [ __ ] police i ran to the [ __ ] gym i had to get my [ __ ] phone off the bus ran to the [ __ ] gym that's what the 11th thing I forgot all about that [ __ ] and I was telling [ __ ] I'm like every time I was on high street retention I noticed I was getting into it with [ __ ] i had to run towards the [ __ ] gym [ __ ] literally ran to the gym then my ex-girlfriend end up calling me cuz Da is her [ __ ] like her [ __ ] brother she end up calling like what happened why is Da tell me he was on the bus getting in a fight long story fast forward i'm at the gym in 2000 [ __ ] 22 November this [ __ ] ass box [ __ ] it's like the 12th [ __ ] within a within a year he following me in the gym i better pull up bar minding my business i move on purpose let you get away from this bugged out ass [ __ ] he comes up to me like "What the [ __ ] you looking at?" I'm like "Nigga what?" Like I already know who you is you think everybody's scared of you and [ __ ] i seen you on YouTube you swear everybody scared of you [ __ ] you said that you a boxer i box [ __ ] i box [ __ ] who like what the [ __ ] you looking at i'm talking calm as hell i'm looking at you why are you staring at me i'm like cuz God gave me the eyes to look where I want to look i'm looking at you he keep woofing and like walking away i'm like you the one walking away [ __ ] i ain't walk away so when he came back up to me like "You think [ __ ] scared you?" I'm like "You scared of me look how you acting you wasn't scared of me look how hyped up you is stop talking so loud you trying to get some attention there's women in here this teenager in here working out like it's kids in here it's old people chill out you scared of me [ __ ] i'm standing right here [ __ ] if you want to do something do something just tell them I'm a boxer i'm from Sudan [ __ ] i got professional fights we can fight i'm like "But you want to go outside?" Like "Yeah let's go outside." I'm like "All right bet let's go." So we walking up with each other like we friends i'm like "But don't cause no scene don't do all that extra [ __ ] cuz I'm not lie around this time this is why I started getting lowkey tired of fighting [ __ ] cuz I already been through enough fights i can't even keep up with them i have been in over 20 30 [ __ ] street fights i'm getting jumped to jumping [ __ ] [ __ ] I'm reaching OG status i'm tired of fighting with [ __ ] the [ __ ] getting annoying now i'm I'm getting into it every time I turn around i'm getting tired of it now so as we walking outside he opens the door he opened the door first the gym main entrance i'm behind him a little bit this goofy ass [ __ ] wasn't paying attention i goes in my bag and grab my pistol and put it in my [ __ ] pocket so he heard my zipper unzip was like "Oh don't be going for no weapons don't be grabbing no weapons." I'm not i'm like "I'm not bro." But he's dumb though bro i'm like I'm not bro he like don't be don't be reaching for nothing i'm like bro I'm not [ __ ] the [ __ ] you talking about i'm not [ __ ] i'm lying to that [ __ ] no I'm not you good i'm not and as soon as we went outside [ __ ] we went kind of towards the side of the gym got his back out on him i'm like "Yo bro who the [ __ ] is you playing with?" Like I'll blow your [ __ ] head off right here [ __ ] don't you ever approach me in no gym trying to fight [ __ ] talking about you a boxer why I [ __ ] kill you [ __ ] you think I'm [ __ ] playing with you at first she started yelling and [ __ ] i'm like "No I don't yell now [ __ ] i already have called my Uber ride wait till my Uber is in front of the gym." And I warned them never underestimate nobody bro never judge a book by its cover cuz you never know who you talking to and what somebody got on then I walked away hopped in the Uber i called my ex and started playing like "Oh my cousin at the gym acting crazy he got an attitude we was hiring him but we're lifting weights whatever." So as me and the Uber driver right he's walking up towards the Uber with his phone i don't know if he recorded i don't know if he found the police i don't know and he like talking [ __ ] and the Uber driver sitting there stupid ass should have got started real [ __ ] trying to fight with me in the gym i'm minding my business like "Bro if you on some demonic [ __ ] leave me alone bro." Cuz I wasn't even on nothing that day i was just trying to just work out and go home bro that's all I was trying to do it was night time i was not in the mood to be bothered with you interrupting my workout you goofy ass [ __ ] the Uber driver sitting there just staring at I'm like "Nigga [ __ ] drive nigga." I'm telling Uber I'm like "Bro that shit's my cousin bro he want some [ __ ] he want to iron you over lift the waist dumb shit." He's sitting like "Oh y'all good?" I'm like "Nigga drive [ __ ] the [ __ ] you talking about on the phone with my ex I'm like "Yeah my cousin at the gym acting crazy about you ain't got no [ __ ] cousin working out with you don't work out with people." So he end up filing with police report but I got away so with within that week I say like two weeks later I go to the [ __ ] gym i was live on on Instagram i'm working on the gym this big ass steroid white boy i don't know what's wrong with this [ __ ] okay he follow me in the gym acting weird so I'm telling my [ __ ] Instagram chat i'm like "Yo I'm about to go in this one like back room at the gym where they be like posing in the mirror whatever if this [ __ ] come back here on some weird [ __ ] I'm telling my mom I'm about to hop on some dog [ __ ] i'm just thinking I don't know what this [ __ ] on cuz every time I look up he follow me and circle me around the gym he on some weird ass [ __ ] i go to this back room this goofy ass [ __ ] come back there with me and me so I'm on Instagram they just can't see i backed out i'm like "Yo bro stop playing with me in this gym bro i'll [ __ ] clap you [ __ ] the [ __ ] wrong with you?" He hers ups and goes up front and tells them to call the police so as I'm leaving cuz my heart beat and I heard call me like "Let me get up out of here." As I'm walking out the police is walking in deep as hell it's like 10 big ass white boys minus 2022 they got mask on big ass white police walking in they looking at me i'm walking out the [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] that worked up front at the gym told the police "Oh it's him it's him it's him." So as I'm in the Uber they heard run outside and jump in front of the Uber like "We got to talk to him we got to talk to him." Left my bag in the car i'm like "What's going on?" Like somebody said that you threaten him with a weapon blah blah blah i'm like "Threat him with a weapon i ain't threatening nobody with no weapon what y'all talking about?" Like what's your name like y'all can run my name i don't got no warrants no none of that i'm like "Nigga I was talking about the UFC fight y'all tripping it was the night I believe Israel out of side was about to fight Alex Carrera it was something like that i'm like "Bro I'm talking about the UFC fight y'all [ __ ] is wild i don't know what y'all talking about what I like [ __ ] i'm" and I showed them the chat i'm like "Nigga I'm on live that's [ __ ] they head up cuz they start reading the chat and everybody in the chat like "No we talking about the UFC fight what they on bro they harassing you they they on some bullshit." So they looking at the chat this what my Instagram was busting way more i'm like "Bro you can ask the chat what the [ __ ] bro it's real life demons and spiritual warfare i'm telling you." I'm like "Bro I'm talking about the UFC fight you can read my chat bro they'll tell you we talking about the UFC fight just scroll up and look at the comments everybody in the chat that's why I [ __ ] with my chat they all vouch for me." Like "Bro all we was doing was talking about the UFC bro we talking about the fights tonight they whing they on some harassment [ __ ] they on some racist shit." So I start asking like is that racist or some [ __ ] bro it's cuz I'm black and at this [ __ ] gym so I'll never forget the cops got me surrounded i'm in the middle my eyes is bulging on my head i'm on mad pre-work on the testosterone the cop literally asked me like "Are you on steroids or something?" Cuz I never forget as I'm talking I'm like getting close to him he like "Don't get that close to me." I'm like "How the [ __ ] is you scared of me and it's 10 of y'all with guns i'm by myself with no weapon on me how the [ __ ] you acting scared of me?" I'm like "Nigga it's 10 of y'all big ass [ __ ] and it was a single female officer there." And she flashing the light near the Uber she talking "Oh he got a bag in the car." I'm like "Don't touch my bag i don't consent the searches." Matter of fact what's your name and badge number she ain't give it to me i'm like "Oh so y'all got tyrants on your team you know you're supposed to identify right it's policy when you're on the clock and you're in uniform you supposed to identify who you are i said "Name and badge number so I can know who trying to violate my rights." She just looking at me she mad so she get away from the car like why you getting so defensive like you don't want me to search like you want me to search your bag i'm like cuz I got a right to consent to searches and seizures i ain't breaking no law [ __ ] you talking about yeah i'm standing on my I'm standing on my rights i I don't consent to search and seizure you supposed to identify yourself when you on the plot i ask your name with Bash number [ __ ] this is New York you're supposed to identify yourself by law and I'm like and your body cam not on what's that about she click the button you're a [ __ ] tyrant stop playing in my face yo got tyrants y squad that come and violate [ __ ] rights got tyrants cuz as I'm talking to the cop I'm like "Bro if you going to be scared of me and I don't got no weapon and it's 10 of y'all you in the wrong [ __ ] field [ __ ] it's 10 of y'all boys that nigga's all got guns [ __ ] you scared of me for." And he thought about it he was like "Yo bro." And he taught me something about body language he said "Are you on steroids?" I'm like "No." Like I'm not going to lie it can be intimidating you tall as hell you big as [ __ ] you got all this energy you animated he said "Let me tell you something i learned something from this officer." He kept it real with me he said "I'm a bigger guy too so when I come across people I have to tone my energy down and my body language." He said "Cuz us bigger guys are always going to be looked at some type of way like we're violent and we on some bullshit." He said "So you just got to be mindful." And but in so many words he also was basically saying "You colored." He was like "You see the neighborhood you in you're a bigger dude utah got some weight on you you got all this energy you got to understand something it can be intimidating to people that's probably why they called the police on you you got to tone that energy down you got to talk more calmer more slower cuz it's going to come off as aggression so when he end up running my name and [ __ ] he was like he caught it over the radio they're like "What's his name?" He told him my name and [ __ ] he was like "Oh he ain't got no warrants." Blah blah blah blah blah blah he good and then the one officer recognized me the one officer with the mask was like he said my full name i said "Yes." And he's like "I know who you." And he pulled me to the side was like "Yo what's going on?" I was like "Bro I don't know what's going on i don't know if they on some racist [ __ ] cuz I'm black i'm at the gym [ __ ] i'm just working out." He already knew who I was he was like "But you do know we got a call about you like a week ago bro and I know who you was i seen your YouTube channel." This was the [ __ ] Kenmore police look I already know who you was this wasn't the BPD this is all white boys bpd is gangsters these is all white boys big ass white boys like we already got a call about you about a week ago bro i'm just being real with you i'm not saying you did it but you got to chill we already got a call about you so I felt like cuz he lowkey knew who I was it was more on some lean [ __ ] but the one officer explained to me was like "Yo bro you know you a bigger dude you tall you got some weight you got some muscle you are in hyped up that [ __ ] can't come off as intimidating that [ __ ] can't come off as aggression so I'm just being real with you you got to tone that energy down when you speak to people he said "It's the same way when I talk to my superiors at my job i can't be super hyped up with them and animated and I'm a bigger dude it's going to come off as threatening it's going to come off as intimidating." And he told that before they let me go then I got up out of there but I realized the moral of the story while I'm telling you all this [ __ ] being on sea retention matched with a bunch of anger because I'm mad about what happened to my mom and all this [ __ ] i'm telling y'all the cons behind it that's why I went through this whole rant [ __ ] that [ __ ] was [ __ ] with my mind for some years bro honestly to keep all the way 100 with y'all I didn't start chilling this is why I say it's a blessing and a curse until I got on probation and start really analyzing myself and analyzing my life and realizing I'm getting too old for this [ __ ] i'm getting too old for this [ __ ] i realized that if I keep on having this victim mentality oh why me why me why this happened to my mom and mixing anger and depression with testosterone and sarms and weed and [ __ ] and drinking but that [ __ ] was setting me on a downhill spiral bro yes it was woman attraction yes I had more energy i was able to put on more muscle but for me personally that [ __ ] had me more violent that [ __ ] had me more in a rage that [ __ ] had me upset at life [ __ ] i was in like a victim mentality bro i'm telling you [ __ ] i wasn't realizing I was wilding that's when he said "I'm getting too old for this shit." Bro I'm telling you bro i start feel like I'm getting too old for this [ __ ] [ __ ] i'm not a Y no more like at the time I'm like what 26 27 [ __ ] i start feeling like I'm too old for this [ __ ] bro i'm not going to lie to you when I got out of jail last year [ __ ] I started analyzing myself i was like "Bro I can't keep doing this [ __ ] bro this [ __ ] got me bugging out low key that's why I don't even try to go in the hood no more i try to stay away from gang bangers and [ __ ] cuz like I'm battling the dark side of me that was out i know that version of me that get me put in jail i know that version of me don't [ __ ] with me i don't want to be my dark side bro cuz that [ __ ] had it felt like it was a dark cloud over me every single day i feel like I was more paranoid i had more anxiety social anxiety i feel like I was more irritable i know that version of me i don't trust that version of me bro i I try to stay away from that version of me that's why if somebody even try to invoke that side of me I try to stay the [ __ ] away from them i know that version of me i know what that [ __ ] had me on bro that [ __ ] had me in jail or dead you have to know yourself as a man i We all got a dark side see the secret is you got to like learn and control your demon this what I'm trying to explain to y'all bro cuz that demon is just there to destroy you [ __ ] that demon don't give a [ __ ] about you you got to learn this [ __ ] that [ __ ] there to destroy you my [ __ ] that's what I'm trying to get you to understand bro you have under control that dark side bro cuz I was indulging cuz see you got understand at the time I was more against God low key cuz I was mad about my mom and [ __ ] yeah you got to battle that [ __ ] for life i was more like I knew a higher power existed but I told you I was in a victim mindset why this happened to my mom why my mom got to be sick why I got to be going through this [ __ ] blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah i was more like a angry consciousness bro i was like more angry i was more having a victim mindset real talk bro i kept making up excuses to why I was so [ __ ] angry and trying to justify it in my mind to why what I was doing was right i'm talking I had to do a lot of self-reflection excuse me i have to That's why people wasn't even realizing I was on a downhill spiral y'all see me up in Blickies on my I was wild i was not in my right mind y thought I was i wasn't that [ __ ] had my mind [ __ ] up i had to stop making excuse for myself and accept reality for what it is my mom older now [ __ ] i can't just be sitting here and whing out cuz I'm mad about it she older now i can't be sitting here wilding out about it cuz I'm upset about it [ __ ] what can I do i can't be sitting here raging and throwing temper [Music] tantrums like that ain't going to [ __ ] help it my [ __ ] i'm trying to explain to you that when you raising your testosterone [ __ ] it's not all peaches and cream like these [ __ ] make it seem [ __ ] it's not all peaches and cream if you don't really like have a moment with thyself and work on you this [ __ ] can destroy you bro that's what I'm trying to explain to people that [ __ ] brings a rage out of you that I don't hear these other dudes talk about or maybe it just wasn't like that for them i don't know i only can speak for me so that's why I said I'm just being like I was thinking I can control it i can control it i wouldn't even necessarily say you learn to control this i feel like the more you fight against it the worse it get you got to learn to just live with it and not let it psychologically like taint your mind cuz everybody's different me personally being on taking breaks from sex and blasting testosterone and smoking and all this [ __ ] me personally had me it was amplifying that and I look back at it like bro I could have lost my life bro the [ __ ] was wrong with me bro and then why am I doing all this when God already blessed me cuz bro going viral is either luck or God blessing you that's as simple as that i already got lucky and the most high blessed me with a whole platform with people that [ __ ] with me what am I doing i have to really start analyzing that I'm [ __ ] taking my blessings for granted i wasn't realizing it i wasn't in my right mind i'm just going to speak for me cuz like I said I'm not going to like the other channels that only tell you "Oh seed retention was so so good for me it was only good coming out." I'm just telling y'all the cons for me if you are already an aggressive violent person with a [ __ ] up attitude is going to amplify that [ __ ] now I'm a lot more chill cuz I'm older now now I know how to let [ __ ] slide off my shoulders like I be feeling like I'm [ __ ] now cuz I let so much [ __ ] go now but it's growth like when my cousins wanted me to fight like what was it like two weeks ago 3 weeks ago and I was like nah they was surprised like what the [ __ ] they called me like yo we need you we need you we need you and I was like nah man I can't I can't I can't pop out like no I'm good i went to the MMA gym and they were so surprised because it's like I'm lowkey trying to slow down i'm 29 years old what the [ __ ] you talking about you're supposed to evolve you're supposed to change i can't keep doing the same [ __ ] I was doing at 16 17 18 19 20 like I'm disrespecting my blessings what the [ __ ] [ __ ] i already [ __ ] up a lot of my blessings by not taking the YouTube [ __ ] super serious like I was supposed to when I was extra viral the [ __ ] you mean [ __ ] like I can't keep disrespecting my blessings i'm getting older now what the [ __ ] [ __ ] y'all calling me for a reason no see once again I forgot i forgot about the 12 victim i got to rewind this is like the 12th one the 13th one i forgot about it when I was at my friend I forgot all about it i told you I be forgetting a lot of these [ __ ] ass [ __ ] I violated and I'm not going for it i'm tell the pros and cons of this [ __ ] and how that [ __ ] got me psychologically [ __ ] up in the mind bro cuz it was a dark cloud over me i'm telling you every day I woke up with a dark [ __ ] cloud over me i feel a lot more better nowadays cuz I finally like that persona I was in bro that was the matrix program i'm supposed to just be a gangster and be violent [ __ ] i'm a lot more conscious i knew that was the ego that was the matrix program like on some real G [ __ ] that's not the real me that was Matrix programming from the simulation the Matrix told me to be bad [ __ ] cuz the Matrix ran like evil i don't think y'all really hear what I'm saying that was the Matrix [ __ ] that was the Matrix programming that's not the real me now I try to help people fight their demons and like slay their demon but not really fight it but try to learn the best that they can control that [ __ ] cuz it will consume you and destroy your life i forgot all about this [ __ ] i told you I'd be forgetting this what the 12th [ __ ] within the year this was 2022 March i'm at my friend Sale house i told you about this [ __ ] i'm in the room talking to her cuz she going through some [ __ ] with her baby father and he trying to get custody of her child she was stressed out i'm in the room talking to her she crying about her baby father trying to take her son my cousin in the other room and text me and said "Yo her cousin came over here with some strange ass nigga." So I came out the [ __ ] room i see some strange ass [ __ ] i told him we got to go he started woofing and talking [ __ ] i'm like "Bro you better get the [ __ ] up out of here." So he woofing basically saying he ain't going nowhere i backed out the knife on him i'm like "If you don't get up out of here [ __ ] I'mma poke you." So he left he left with Safe Cousins say the one I used to be cooking her and all this other [ __ ] i was just around her a couple weeks ago she didn't find out until like two years later that I was the one that ended up doing this to her cousin cuz that was her blood i'm like "Yo I need you to get up out of here." He left with her cousin right her cousin left his iPad at the building his iPad is connected to his iCloud so when he ended up dropping the [ __ ] off and was on his way back to say house he's texting the [ __ ] that I made leave and the [ __ ] that I made leave is asking him "Who is that [ __ ] where is he from how old is that [ __ ] he telling him "Oh his name JRo he like 26 27 i went to school with him his real name is such and such his name on Facebook is this." And the [ __ ] like "That I got [ __ ] that's really on that i'mma have him slide and hit that house up." So my cousin is using a iPad cuz her cousin say cousin let my cousin use his iPad so he like "Yo bro look at this [ __ ] i think they talking about you." I'm like "What the [ __ ] they spelled it J R O L L like roll like a roller like a like a like you rolling they spell J O J R O L L." That's why my cousin like "Yo look at this [ __ ] bro why is her cousin giving this [ __ ] the okay to come shoot this house up and this is his cousin house at that say it's his cousin what type this [ __ ] on some back door [ __ ] I'm like sh bet so the [ __ ] ended up coming to the building it's like we wait till it get night time like 12 1 in the morning say go in her room she go to I go I go in the bathroom i turn the shower on i turn the faucet on i go in the kitchen i turn the faucet on we start blasting a little dirt so we start asking her cousin like "Yo was you trying to like be on some setup back door shit?" He starts saying no so my cousin showed him the tab was like "So what is this?" And he reading he started lying pop on him pop on him then my cousin popped on him we just want him to be honest with us cuz we was cool with him but he lying in our face and we got the messages right on the iPad cuz your dumb ass forgot that you let my cousin use the iPad it's connected to your iCloud so all the text messages being sent to your iPad [ __ ] you a dummy so he like "Ain't this you texting your friend?" And he looking like "Oh I don't remember saying that." Blah blah blah blah pop on him i literally remember he was sitting down and I hit the [ __ ] the [ __ ] went out and I grabbed him by his shirt i'm like "No no no no no." And I keep it real i felt bad for him but I couldn't feel bad in the heat of moment bro in the heat of battle cuz he trying to get me shot [ __ ] emotions right now i felt bad for a little bit but at the end of the day [ __ ] you trying to get me killed [ __ ] [ __ ] emotions right now [ __ ] oh well i'm like no no no no no stay with me i'm grabbing my shirt here on And I told him I'm like see this is how you little [ __ ] come to jail and get beat to death see y'all not used to really fight me y used to doing the little [ __ ] fight and one day I hit the ground it's over with this is how I get beat to death and don't realize this [ __ ] [ __ ] this is how you little [ __ ] get hurt playing up here i'm like "No no no no no stay with me [ __ ] stay with me." I'm asking about it he still keep on lying i'm feeling like he ain't taking me serious so I'm like "Nigga stand up bro." Little [ __ ] stood up stand up little [ __ ] stood up i grabbed the [ __ ] by his neck and started choking the dog [ __ ] out of him choking the dog [ __ ] out of him to the point where a [ __ ] I literally took him off his feet while I dare grandma took him off his [ __ ] feet let him sit back down i'm like just be honest with me bro like what's going on like it's just about honesty for real for real it's about being honest and have integrity that's what I'm trying to explain to him but you can't explain [ __ ] to these [ __ ] i'm like bro it's just about honesty bro just tell me what happened bro like just tell me what's going on just be real with me so he studied lying now my cousin is randomly popping on him just popping on the [ __ ] just punching the [ __ ] so as he's sitting there he won't be honest with me so I pulled out the pimp blade i'm like "Yo you think I'm playing with you?" I grabbed the [ __ ] by his face and cut the [ __ ] from here and here then I cut the [ __ ] on his other side of his face from here to here well you my dead grandma cuz you trying to get me killed you trying to back door me and you lying to me we wouldn't even went on him the way we went if he would have just been honest as a man we wouldn't have been did half what we did to him he's lying about it since he lying you about to walk away damaged the rest of your life so I took out a knife and cut the [ __ ] from here and cut the [ __ ] on this side then my cousin had to tell me to chill cuz I ended up stabbing the [ __ ] in the neck but I didn't mean to cuz I put the knife to his neck i didn't realize I was pushing it into his [ __ ] neck my cousin like "Yo you you out doing too much now chill out bro you out." [ __ ] bleeding out a hole in his neck and [ __ ] so then I told y this [ __ ] i made the [ __ ] lay on the floor i said "Nigga put your face up look up." The [ __ ] look up and I stood on his [ __ ] Adams app i'm just start putting my weight in choking with my foot i'm like "Nigga I'll [ __ ] kill you you trying to get me shot [ __ ] boy I'll [ __ ] kill you what the [ __ ] is wrong with you bro you trying to get me shot you trying to get me back door cuz mind you me and him went to school together and that same month I had took like we had went to the little bar or some [ __ ] and I was teaching him how to basically like bag women cuz he didn't really have that confidence and we went to school with each other for years that was my little man's he was only like a year younger than me that was my little man's so I felt weird what the [ __ ] so I felt weird with him cuz we was cool i felt weird with him bro it's 3:47 a real bad this is like a war a horror story i felt weird with him so I told him like "Lay on the floor look up look up towards the sibling." That [ __ ] looked up i put my whole foot in his neck i'm like "Nigga I will [ __ ] kill you." You like my cousin grab like chill chill chill my cousin tried to tell me like we could rob him up but you kind of like chill and mind you this is my cousin that I told y'all in 2021 when [ __ ] tried to rob the spot that we was trapping out of and I wanted him to go slide we end up about to get ready about to fight because I was kind of overstepping my boundaries cuz he is like two or three years older than me and he lowkey a G and I was like overly aggressive with him he like "No [ __ ] that bro we got to shake we got to shake." So I feel like I have something to prove because I didn't fight him cuz that's my blood cousin i don't believe in fighting family but we was about to fight outside but I was talking about like "Yo bro chill bro i'm like you my cousin i don't want to fight you but chill bro we should be taking this anger with the [ __ ] that tried to rob the spot we shouldn't be beefing with each other we should be going and slide on the [ __ ] that [ __ ] tried to [ __ ] blow your head off when they try to come rob the building what the [ __ ] we going at each other for let's take this angle and go pop up on them [ __ ] so I feel like I lowkey has something to prove i feel like I have something to prove your goofy ass these young [ __ ] don't know what reality be to look at violence crazy they only stand aggression big facts so this is cuz I already feel like I have something to prove i feel like he you know I feel like he kind of had one up on me cuz he older cuz I ain't going to fight you but you cuz you know how my body work but you family bro we blood instead of us arguing and fight with each other we should be going to slide on other [ __ ] cuz he got mad at me cuz I told him we was in the house if you don't [ __ ] slide on these [ __ ] bro you going to look like a poop pup bro you look like a [ __ ] in the hood bro i'mma tell [ __ ] you ain't standing on business and I end up calling my cousin Charlie my cousin Charlie I told you had me fighting that one [ __ ] over his little [ __ ] and I end up hitting the [ __ ] with the taser over him cuz he was fighting that one [ __ ] [ __ ] then the one [ __ ] spitt on him at the job and I made him come jumping i call him cuz we are cousins i'm like yo c acting soft as hell so I'm saying trigger words that I know I should have been saying but I was just mad cuz we was drinking that day cuz was drinking with me he was sniffing coke so he was already overaggressive and he was just analyzing everything so when I kept saying "Bro you going to look be looked at as a [ __ ] in the hood." He like "Bro we got to shake." I'm like "Nigga we can get on with him." But I shouldn't have did that cuz that is still family that's my blood family he already had enough going on in his mind cuz the [ __ ] just backed out on him so I lowkey feel like I have something to prove cuz I ain't going to lie to people i I look here have to feel like I have something to prove to you because like you got me [ __ ] up because just cuz I ain't [ __ ] do nothing to you i'mma show you what I do to [ __ ] i'mma show you that I was letting you slide cuz you my older [ __ ] cousin you my blood but you got me [ __ ] up cuz you made me kitty i feel like I look like a goofy cuz it was a female there and I ain't fighting because it's his family so they the female they go "Oh he saw he bitch." [ __ ] this my older cousin mind your business [ __ ] you talking about so yeah me and cousin cousin showing me like "Yo look at this [ __ ] bro." Cuz you know cousins sometimes we got like brothers y fight like brothers whatever so we asked him about this the tab and [ __ ] he lying about it popped on him cousin punched him cousin said he beating him i'm only hitting him one time and I keep talking to him but he keep lying so I remember I asked him about it he's sitting on the couch i hit the [ __ ] that [ __ ] ass [ __ ] was I'm like "No no no no no no no no sit your ass up [ __ ] nah nah no no no this is a real fight [ __ ] this is how you little [ __ ] get beat to death y'all come to jail sit your ass up." So cousin white right there this is my older cousin you see me pull out the knife i'm like "Oh for real [ __ ] you nigga." Uh uh put the knife to his neck i'm like "Do you think I'm [ __ ] playing with you you think I'm playing with you?" Accidentally stabbed him in his neck not too crazy though but it did pierce him a little bit he bleed like "Oh shit." Ah my [ __ ] get the [ __ ] on the ground [ __ ] looked up stood on his [ __ ] neck and cousin kicked him in the head [ __ ] ass [ __ ] so I remember like before that like I said I ended up choking this [ __ ] ass [ __ ] and had him in the [ __ ] ear choking this dumb ass [ __ ] that's when I made him lay down so as he sit on the couch he talking cous shut your [ __ ] ass up smack him then I just hit him again we all my dead we was beating this [ __ ] for over an hour for over an hour so I told the [ __ ] I can't really dulge too much what I told him but I'm basically talking like your life is in danger right now if you going to try to back door me I'mma back door you you got me [ __ ] up right now so me and cousin like stomping this [ __ ] ass punching his ass keep making him sit down so cousin pulling me to the side like "Yo bro chill." But the [ __ ] keeps standing up like he about to try to run out the door i'm like cuz cuz he's standing out too far i'm like make that [ __ ] sitting down he on some weird [ __ ] he end up sitting down and [ __ ] we just keep jumping the [ __ ] out this dumb ass [ __ ] for like an hour straight beating this [ __ ] [ __ ] got knots on his head eye black nose [ __ ] up lips is busted [ __ ] sitting there bleeding i I'm not going to lie to you i low key started feeling bad for the [ __ ] but I couldn't feel bad bro if that makes sense i low key was feeling bad for him cuz we was cool but now it's like my name and reputation line cuz I feel like was already thinking I was [ __ ] cuz I ain't fighting him cuz he my blood this [ __ ] tried to back door me this had to happen it's like the 13th one i told you I be forgetting [ __ ] this had to happen and the reason why I respected him cuz he didn't rap he didn't snitch cuz it's his same cousin cuz not only do I got the shower running I got the bath running in the bathroom i got the [ __ ] faucet running the kitchen sink running i'm blasting the music so she can't hear [ __ ] in the room this had to happen bro i didn't want it to happen but [ __ ] it had to [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] it had to it is what it is i couldn't feel bad in the heat of the moment you couldn't like at the end of the day I couldn't feel bad eating the moment cuz he was already on some back door like the one [ __ ] I used to work with she looked smoked out [ __ ] it had to happen yeah we right next to Philly we right next to Philly philly not far from me philly only a couple hours away from me philadelphia close as hell but this [ __ ] had to happen though so the next day he was supposed to be bringing say to work and [ __ ] and I just told him i'm like do not tell her what happened whatever so the next day he was driving say to work and she car was like "Yo did you see C's face?" I'm like "What's wrong with him?" Like his face all lumped up his face bleeding he said he was at the bar and he was drunk and he was on pills and he was talking crazy and some [ __ ] jumped him i respected him after that cuz then he came back to the building he apologized like "Bro I totally understand why you did that [ __ ] to me." Cuz then he finally admitted it and was like "I was wrong for being on some back door [ __ ] bro i shouldn't have did that [ __ ] bro we equal my bad bro i apologize i shouldn't have did that [ __ ] bro i understand where you coming from that was wrong this steal my cousin house i should have been giving out your information and letting my own friend said he going to shoot my cousin house up i'm like bro that's all I was trying to tell you bro i was just on some real [ __ ] like you can't be on no back door [ __ ] that's all I was trying to tell you bro but he ended up apologizing and keeping it 100 so I respected him and he didn't tell her what happened i ended up telling her like two years later like in 2024 I'm like I have beat the [ __ ] out of him i just didn't want to tell you cuz that's your cousin and she was like "Why?" I was like "Remember that [ __ ] I made leave he was trying to back door me." And my cousin was giving him all my information and telling him what my nickname is and what school I used to go [Music] to and all this other like back like back door [ __ ] she respected it though no problem bro that was her cousin like that was my boy like he went to school you know what I'm saying like that's c like he didn't like cuz that's her cousin but I respect him cuz he kept it gangster he never snitched or ratted on me and never said "Oh Jada went that beat me up blah blah blah blah." Cuz she called me like "Yo he got knots on his head his eyes [ __ ] black his nose [ __ ] up his lip [ __ ] up he got cuts on his face look like somebody [ __ ] cut him look like he got stabbed by I don't know what happened to this [ __ ] he told me about to go to the hospital i'm like damn that [ __ ] crazy when she called me but I respected it cuz he didn't say [ __ ] then he came back to the building i'm not going to lie i made his ass [ __ ] sit on the couch and go to sleep then he told me like "Yeah I'm just going to chop it up as a loss bro." And he ended up giving me like this was he he ended up giving me like $2,000 and I split it with my cousin i took a,000 i gave it to my cousin i gave my cousin the other thousand he was like "Here bro my bad bro cuz what I did was wrong but I apologize." So I'm not going to lie i ended up recording apologize i'm like "Yo bro you apologize for the part that you played right?" He said "Yeah." And I was "Okay I apologize for getting into it with you we equal i'm going leave this [ __ ] alone you apologize i apologize it was a misunderstanding this [ __ ] shouldn't happen about 3 months later I ran into his mans that was acting like he was going to have somebody shoot the building up right i ran into him i was in traffic because right he at the [ __ ] bus stop i had the [ __ ] recorded too i hopped on recording right and I walked into I'm like "Yo what's up with that shit?" He already knew what happened to his man i'm like "What's up with you saying you was going to get the house shut up let's shoot the fade right now." He like "Nah bro i got a son i don't know that street [ __ ] no more bro i got a job now i'm going to college bro i'm not even on that bro i don't want to fight you bro i'm good one thing I told y'all about me bro i'm just not no bully ass [ __ ] if a [ __ ] turns some [ __ ] down I honestly don't need to be looking at him like "Oh you suck." I respect it cool it is what it is we going to call it the truth we going to leave that [ __ ] alone my older brother would have [ __ ] you up i'm a lot different than my older brother my older brother's a lot worse my older brother wouldn't wouldn't hear none of that [ __ ] if I would have been my older brother you'd have heard that fool that [ __ ] crazy my brother Allan wouldn't want to hear none of that [ __ ] my brother Allan wouldn't want to hear none of that [ __ ] he was like "Nigga [ __ ] that." But I made him apologize on camera i put the camera to his face i was like "Nigga apologize then." He end up apologizing i'm like "All right bet we going to leave it alone." All right bet then I came to his job after that with Cuz I know exactly what McDonald's he worked at i'm like "Oh let's go here." We walked in there ordered some [ __ ] he was looking at us kind of crazy looking kind of scared and we end up dpping but it was just the principle of don't be on some back door [ __ ] bro only reason I told you to leave cuz I didn't know you you start getting hella gangster don't be on no back door [ __ ] like do not be on no back door [ __ ] bro like you on some like sneaky weird [ __ ] like that back door [ __ ] don't play that don't Don't play around bro [ __ ] happened to you like chill out but yeah say cousin ended up having to go to the hospital he was [ __ ] up but he kept it gangster though he ain't say nothing he ain't snitch so I got a lot of respect for him i actually respect him a lot more after that we end up letting [ __ ] go but yeah that's why I said I couldn't even I I done forgot about a lot of [ __ ] that I was doing so I erased it on my mind i don't be keeping up with these [ __ ] ass [ __ ] i erase a lot of that [ __ ] on my brain for real a lot of that [ __ ] I honestly forgot about for real for real keep it 100 with you a lot of that [ __ ] I just started forgetting about yeah before I whooped his ass how I took like what 30 testosterone boosters and nine creatine oh I'm about to beat his ass he got me [ __ ] up in here [ __ ] you got me [ __ ] up i'm about to get booted up real quick the [ __ ] wrong with you boy you got me [ __ ] up i'm about to [ __ ] beat your ass [ __ ] [ __ ] you got me [ __ ] up in this [ __ ] boy i'm about to beat your ass the [ __ ] wrong with you oh y'all popped like 30 testosterone boosters took mad creating his ass me and my cousin boy you got me [ __ ] up did you get me shot all right bet so when he when I recorded the video after we whipped his ass and he was apologizing I end up blinking on my girl J at the time and showed her the video like look at this [ __ ] like what happened i had to beat the dog this [ __ ] me and my cousin [ __ ] tried to set me up trying to get me shot we have to put hands on this [ __ ] [ __ ] like the [ __ ] trying to back door me get me shot i left to put hands on this [ __ ] [ __ ] then I keep I told you I be forgetting [ __ ] but I done forgot so much [ __ ] bro i told her I be forgetting [ __ ] say ended up call me when I be cooking and said "Where you at i need you right now." I might watch like this [ __ ] at my mom house just called me a hoe oh say less amanda came to get me the [ __ ] was outside they was having like a little bonfire he didn't even know that I was popping up we acting cool and [ __ ] we sitting down i'm just eyeing him so when he walked in the house I never forget Amanda was right there say was right there they start telling me to chill i'm like "Yo you call say a hoe call her a hole in front of my face." Some big ass Spanish i'm like "You call her a hoe right call her a hole in front of my face." He like "No it wasn't like that bro i apologize it wasn't like that was not i'm like "No no no call her home in front of my face i want to see you say it in front of me call her a hoe i dare you." Yeah the cooking chick he end up calling her a hoe and she called like "Where you at?" That's why I told you Seline was really the homie hold on shout out to whoever just sent me that [ __ ] PayPal shout out to whoever that was shout out to whoever just sent me that [ __ ] PayPal i'm about to go to the [ __ ] gym y'all got me too [ __ ] turn i need to exert this energy shout out to me that [ __ ] PayPal i see you i love you i see you slap and we protect the women bro we protect the women bro stop playing with me bro shut up just s [ __ ] P i see you stop playing with me stop playing with me i love my supporters it don't always got to be a lot on here but I got real supporters that [ __ ] with me shout out to the real cuz the streets know I be keeping the B i never take nothing from nobody so this big ass Spanish [ __ ] call say we ain't a ho so we was in the kitchen i think his name Alex shout out to Alex you [ __ ] ass [ __ ] you a [ __ ] suck a dick [ __ ] and say it about [ __ ] she was right there i'm like "Yo call her a hole again call her a hoe." Like "I'mma beat your ass i'm about to beat you the [ __ ] up call her a hoe again i want to see you do it you gangster with a female right call my sister a hoe again." None of us saying like "All right J chill chill chill let him slide let him slide." I'm like "All right bet got up out of here stop playing me with your [ __ ] ass you a [ __ ] stop playing with me [ __ ] don't do that [ __ ] you a [ __ ] don't do that [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] you talking about don't do that [ __ ] [ __ ] don't call my sister no [ __ ] ho." The [ __ ] you thought this was and I was wilding that day this was summer time 2022 once again y'all already know I used to be blasting testosterone a lot in my younger years i just didn't want to tell y'all cuz I didn't want y'all doing that [ __ ] but I did it on camera a couple times it is what it is i just didn't want the [ __ ] that was watching me to think that they should do it cuz it's dangerous i end up taking like 40 50 testosterone boosters i took some creatine HCL and it was off the [ __ ] tequila i was off some [ __ ] tequila so when I walked up in there I'm possessed cuz I told you I used to open my vessel up to allow these gems to take over that's why people think that it was me doing that that [ __ ] really wasn't me people be thinking I'm crazy oh he's schizophrenic or some type of psychosis no I'm not i know that in real life I'm really a peaceful person i just know how to tap into a violent side of me that's not really me i'm meant to help people help people better themselves i'm just keeping them 100 with y'all i'm really a cool person in real life i don't be on that [ __ ] for real no more i be feeling like I got soft i be feeling like I got [ __ ] now cuz I left so much [ __ ] though now i be really feel like I got soft now i ain't going to lie to you i be feeling like damn but I get [ __ ] but I get soft am I a [ __ ] now i be feeling like that now i ain't gonna lie to you i be real deal feeling like that now i be feel like I got soft now but it's just growth though bro cuz I be real dealing like damn did I get soft like did I get [ __ ] the [ __ ] is wrong with me like am I losing myself nah I start letting [ __ ] go for real oh [ __ ] when I went to New York City y'all remember I had the [ __ ] recorded when I went to New York City and this one [ __ ] [ __ ] was Max i had a red flag out and he was in a train station talking crazy and I walked into him like "Bro why the [ __ ] why the [ __ ] you talking like you like that bro?" Y'all remember that [ __ ] i had to catch myself my uncle start cussing me out like "Bro you're not even funny you're violent [ __ ] you not even supposed to be at the [ __ ] Amtrak station what are you doing [ __ ] like what is wrong with you now you not solved you walking away out of fear of yourself not any facts when you know what you can do and ain't no point that's a fact i do be feeling I did have moments now when I be feeling sorry because I had a I'mma tell y'all some [ __ ] and I was telling my woman about this i'm going to tell you about this [ __ ] i end up getting into the one [ __ ] at the New York train station when I went out of town for that one YouTuber that was woofing know what the [ __ ] was wrong with him doing all that woofing on the internet like stop [ __ ] playing with [ __ ] i popped up in the city quick and you think I used to be in the city more than you [ __ ] [ __ ] wrong with you you crazy then before that I ran into this one [ __ ] from LA this grape street [ __ ] it was some crips out there he was talking crazy this fat ass [ __ ] with locks i was with one of my other mans I ended up seeing one of the blood [ __ ] I knew from New York City i'm chopping it up with him the one [ __ ] grapes [ __ ] i ain't going to lie he wasn't no [ __ ] ass [ __ ] but he respected me while I remember I told you it's not about being tough or big or bad it's about having balls he impressed us cuz we had red flags up he was do like [ __ ] I'm from LA [ __ ] i'm grape street [ __ ] where I'm from we don't play that i'm like I'm not gonna lie i'm kind of confused like [ __ ] what are you talking about i see you [ __ ] flagged up red flags on this [ __ ] i'm from Grape Street [ __ ] we could get it [ __ ] we can get it i'm like what what the hell mind you I got my pocket knife on me cuz all bloods carry weapons my other blood man's got a knife on us but we like talking to [ __ ] like "What is you talking about?" So like he looking at my man like "Oh shit." He literally said like "Oh y'all going to jump me y'all going to jump me?" I'm like "Nigga ain't nobody about to jump you." I could have hopped on some Wild Boy [ __ ] it's me and my other band he big as hell i'm like "Nigga this ain't LA though [ __ ] you're in New York City this [ __ ] is blood turf [ __ ] what you talking about [ __ ] i don't know what y'all do out in LA i'm not from out there i don't know if y'all color bang and all that [ __ ] in LA i'm not from out there [ __ ] you in New York what the [ __ ] is you talking about [ __ ] or y'all going to jump me y'all [ __ ] going to jump me y'all could jump me then like [ __ ] ain't nobody going to jump you [ __ ] the [ __ ] you talking about like was my just got into with the other [ __ ] [ __ ] i didn't know that was his man's so when I was off camera he walked into me like "Nigga I'm grape street [ __ ] we can get it [ __ ] i'm from LA [ __ ] i'm from where this [ __ ] originated from i'm from LA nigga." And I kept it real i'm like you do know you in the dirt like what y'all doing in LA this is not your turf you way across the [ __ ] states right now like this is not the West Coast bro like y'all don't have no jurisdiction over here whether you know it or not this is New York City [ __ ] i get what you saying you from the motherland cool you in New York cuz I'm old but y'all about to drop me or some [ __ ] i said we could get it [ __ ] that [ __ ] could jump me like [ __ ] ain't nobody trying to jump you but I'm not going to lie I did pull out the knife when he kept yapping at first i backed out the blade on i'm like "Nigga what you trying to do?" And he look "Oh see y'all going to jump me hey y'all got knives on y'all." I'm like "Bro you talking crazy bro you keep talking about you from LA you grape street." Shout out to the homie though cuz he ain't turned it down but he didn't know that was a death mission when a person pull out a knife [ __ ] a knife sometimes be more dangerous than a gun you could rush your [ __ ] with a gun if you know what you're doing when a person pull out a knife [ __ ] you honestly should get the [ __ ] away from I'm just being real with you knives is more dangerous [ __ ] pull out a knife bro you should not be trying to fight that [ __ ] you must got some type of mental illness so I end up putting a knife away and I'm just talking to my bro mind you the New York police they walk all around that [ __ ] they don't even give a [ __ ] i'm like "Yo bro." Like "Ain't nobody trying to do nothing to you bro i get it you grape street you standing on business you represent your hood but I didn't know that was your man I just got into it with but ain't nobody trying to jump you [ __ ] you bothering." He ended up giving me like three or four apes allowed three or four apes his whole energy changed he ended up giving like three or four apes allowed and he basically was talking about I respect that you [ __ ] ain't try to jump y'all could have jumped me up by myself bro i was just pressing y'all because this was my friend this was my man's but I see that y'all some thoroughb bread young [ __ ] he was older older dark skin black ass [ __ ] big as hell fat as hell with dreads with a purple flag walked up to us and I knew he was from LA or the way he was dressed he had the blue chucks on he had the purple flag it's just the way he was dressed and the way he was talking i'm saying y'all trying to mark my mans like you mark [ __ ] on the hood [ __ ] on grape street [ __ ] I'm from great street [ __ ] I'm from LA [ __ ] blah blah blah but when we didn't jump him he end up just giving me some free gas was like here I respect y [ __ ] bro I'm like oh all right bet [ __ ] all right bet that was 2022 I'm like oh [ __ ] all right bet cool I ain't [ __ ] I guess so [ __ ] it cool so a couple weeks ago remember I told you I was feeling like I was getting soft but I [ __ ] with the young [ __ ] and this young [ __ ] end up respecting me my younger cousin was upstairs you know they be [ __ ] with little [ __ ] whatever i'm downstairs i'm about to go live on TikTok she come downstairs like cousin can you come upstairs this [ __ ] upstairs talking crazy and I told him "I got [ __ ] that'll do that to him can you come upstairs like he talking crazy?" I told him "I got [ __ ] that are spent for me." I put my shoes on i go upstairs it's the [ __ ] Porky in the room these little [ __ ] I've been on since they was young though young young they know I be on some older bro [ __ ] that's be on some cool [ __ ] as long as you notify me that you want to come over I get it i just be young want to chill with girls and [ __ ] but I get it just let me know you in the building cuz I always let them know I can be [ __ ] in here but I can chill with them smoke whatever i don't give a [ __ ] so my little cousin N like "Yo I need you to come upstairs and keep talking crazy he calling out my name come upstairs." And I walked in that [ __ ] room i look there some little light-kinned [ __ ] a little light-kinned [ __ ] i'm like "Oh now you scared now now you scared now." Here go my cousin now you scared now i'm like "Na it's a little boy i'm grown as hell." He look old enough to be my son i ain't going to touch this little ass boy but I asked him like "How old is you?" Like "I'm 14 bro i'm 14." And I respected that he had heart so now my cousin she woofing now talking crazy like yeah now my cousin in here you scared as hell he like this [ __ ] big as hell this [ __ ] big as hell i got brothers that get wild i got brothers that get wild i flat out told him like I don't give a damn about your brothers i'm not going to do nothing to you though bro you're 14 years old bro are you serious you're a kid like I got to son these little [ __ ] you're a kid bro you a teenager like what the [ __ ] is we talking about i'm looking at my little sister like I'm not going to get into it no 14-year-old girl what's wrong with you i'm like listen if y'all can't chill with each other and just smoke and vibe y'all going to have to just leave somebody got to remove yourself that's just what it is if y'all can't chill just have a good time y'all just going to have to go so he waking his man like "Shit [ __ ] it we about to just leave about to just leave so he keep telling my cousin like "Ain't nobody going to put my hands on me." She like "You only saying that cuz my cousin really said he ain't going to fight you you a kid so if you was older and you was grown you the winning your shit." She said "Ain't nobody going to touch me." She like said to his face so I'm standing right here he like not too far from me and he stood up he was like looking down i said "Ain't nobody going to touch me ain't nobody going to put their hands on me i mean little bird I'm not about to fight you bro you 14 years old bro and you good i get it you got hurt i respect it but understand I'm a grown man bro you a teenager bro you 14 years old chill out bro like you good bro you can't y'all can't just get along just see I'm not like the [ __ ] that was my age bracket back in the day that used to be trying to fight teenagers and [ __ ] i don't believe in doing that sucker [ __ ] cuz sometimes these little [ __ ] just you giving them some guidance and talking to them like they a [ __ ] dog and keeping that thorough with them they don't forget you like that so I'm going tell you what end up happening the next morning I was walking to the store and I had to run into Satan and he was deep as hell a lot of his homies and he seen me and ran up to like "What's good big bro?" and slap my hand up like "Yo what's good with you bro i [ __ ] with you." Was like "Yo this nigga's a real [ __ ] bro." N had the game to try to come fight me or some [ __ ] and he came and holl at me on some grown man i respect this [ __ ] and all his little homies what's good big bro they was deep as hell they could have [ __ ] jumped me it's like 12 13 of them standing right at the corner cuz when I'm on the east side that [ __ ] is game land i'm like "Yo bro you're a little homie bro i [ __ ] with the Yans." [ __ ] I used to be a Y you crazy but the difference is in my generation bro when I was your age the older [ __ ] used to be on some [ __ ] bro i've been your age i get it but the older [ __ ] when I was coming used to be on some [ __ ] i [ __ ] with the Yans [ __ ] i'm not trying to fight y'all little [ __ ] like I literally told him like "Bro you 14 i'm 30 i understand that you was born in like 2013 14 i've been was outside bro i've been in your age bracket before [ __ ] but I just kept it 100 with him i said I'mma keep it real with you this is why you little [ __ ] just got to be mindful when y'all be in the streets and y'all be going to these females houses bro cuz some of them got brothers and cousins that be on some straight [ __ ] i [ __ ] with the young [ __ ] though some [ __ ] don't be on some player [ __ ] bro oh yes I remember remember I told you he was like 14 i respected him though cuz he got hurt cuz he don't even know that he talking to a young G but he got hurt he got hurt that's why I respected him i seen me in him cuz I was him getting to where [ __ ] that's grown as hell that I know can beat the [ __ ] out of me i know like "Oh [ __ ] this [ __ ] gonna whoop my ass." That's how I used to be feeling sometimes but he had a heart and he was brave and courageous to be that age cuz he stood up he wasn't too fired for me he was looking to his like be cuz my sister was like "Oh say to his face say to his face since you so tough." And he stood up he was too fire but I'm just looking at him like "Bro I said ain't nobody going to touch me ain't nobody going to put their hands on me like I said nobody going to touch me." I'm like "Bro I ain't about to fight you you 14 years old bro you understand that bro you what you I'm How old is you 14?" I'm 30 you do the math you're literally old enough to be my son bro what are we talking about you born like 2K 13 12 whatever [ __ ] you're old enough to be my son but you was born in 2012 what the hell [ __ ] you are a kid bro i'm not about to do nothing to you relax calm down you good bro like relax bro but I respected him you know why cuz remember I told you it's not about being tough it's not about being gangster it's about having balls he displayed that he had balls so then afterwards you know they kid him and my little cousin was getting along he came over the next day deep as hell with a bunch of his homies it was cool as hell i'm like "Yeah young [ __ ] what the fuck?" Came in the room like "Oh what's good big bro?" All his men slept in like "What up what's good with y'all niggas?" The cho was about to go fight young [ __ ] [ __ ] i was like "I was keeping it with y [ __ ] we used to fight in my generation if y'all going to [ __ ] fight [ __ ] y'all better go [ __ ] make sure y'all win don't touch that ground [ __ ] i'm like should I bend your age bracket [ __ ] we about to go fight these one [ __ ] i'm like [ __ ] go ahead on your business these are these are kids [ __ ] on your business but I just kept it real with them if I was y'all to go fight but y'all go fight cuz in y'all generation y'all just shoot shoot i mean but in my generation we fought i mean if y'all gonna fight go fight i'm just keeping it real with y'all just be mindful be careful cuz you saying that these [ __ ] keep trying to lead y'all to their hood they keep making the location closer and closer to their block sound like a setup to me y'all [ __ ] around and pop up there and y'all outnumbered these [ __ ] got guns and they blitz y why that [ __ ] screaming yeah bro they little [ __ ] bro like you don't get points for doing [ __ ] like that you lose points you don't get respect like that bro yeah i don't know why this [ __ ] is screaming i was like you heard that [ __ ] yeah you don't really get points doing [ __ ] like that bro and then in 2023 I never forget I was going into the Bailey and Minnesota store bro got 30 on me this little [ __ ] I'm crossing the street he cross the street coming towards me [ __ ] said "What you looking at?" I was telling about that [ __ ] i just looked at him like he was crazy i'm like "Yo these white ends is crazy these little [ __ ] is wild i'm like "These little Ys is crazy." [ __ ] said "What you looking at?" I didn't say nothing to them i just kept it pushing i'm like "Yo these little Ys be wilding bro." To me that's crazy to me to be honest with you cuz they just be talking to anybody don't know who the [ __ ] they really even talking to i got a whole Glock on me brand new for 030 what the [ __ ] are you talking about bro come on bro y'all y'all [ __ ] got understand like y'all parents need to be [ __ ] teaching y'all children a lot better bro as another [ __ ] would have left his ass another shooter would just left his ass like y'all parents need to be teaching y'all children a lot better bro i lowkey blame the parents half the time for real for real i be feeling bad for a lot of these Yans i be blaming the parents want me to keep it to being with you i blame the parents bro why aren't you teaching your child better than this somebody else would have left his ass your parents got to do better bro like these little [ __ ] don't have no home training he look like you in like 14 15 little [ __ ] what you looking at i'm like "What the hell?" Uh okay y'all parents got to do better bro raising y'all kids bro like on some real [ __ ] these little [ __ ] just be out here wild as hell y'all lowkey be feeling bad for a lot of them cuz maybe some of them don't got parents maybe some of them don't got brothers or grandparents or uncles or aunties that's really giving them gang and [ __ ] i lowkey be feeling bad for the Lions going to be all the real with you cuz I was you before i was you don't really know what you doing cuz you're a kid like that's why I just be on some more chill [ __ ] because when I became an adult and I realized the spiritual [ __ ] behind this [ __ ] how dangerous this [ __ ] really get how vicious humans can be when I actually seen real deal violence and seeing the level this [ __ ] get took to be a lot more mindful who the [ __ ] I just talked to that's why I stay away from people in public i try not to make eye contact i know how dangerous this [ __ ] can get bro i know that it's killers and [ __ ] will kill you out here this [ __ ] ain't no game bro [ __ ] will hawk your ass down and splat your [ __ ] real talk this [ __ ] real out here [ __ ] you can die this [ __ ] is [ __ ] you can die that [ __ ] is not no video game but it's a video game it's a simulation but you can die out here [ __ ] your character could get deleted [ __ ] like these little [ __ ] be so crazy to me cuz they'll just say something to anybody don't even be knowing who they can be speaking to what a [ __ ] got on them but a lot of times it's not even their fault though because some of some of them don't got parents or family and the right upbringing to really kick gain and knowledge to them that's why anytime I come across my ends and I'm in the trenches or some [ __ ] I just try to kick it with them and get a real game instead of trying to take advantage of them i'm like "Come on bro you a little [ __ ] the [ __ ] wrong with you bro you a little [ __ ] bro chill out bro." Like I get it though i've been your age but like chill out though bro you a little [ __ ] bro like chill out bro hey bro just go about your day bro i could have took advantage of you when you turned your back back down and ran up to you and put it to the back of your [ __ ] skull like who the [ __ ] you talking to little [ __ ] get the [ __ ] over here [ __ ] is wrong with you get on the [ __ ] ground face forward [ __ ] face flat get on the ground face first who the [ __ ] you you a little [ __ ] i know you don't really know what you saying bro i was ignorant and dumb like you little [ __ ] said "Who you looking what you looking at?" I'm like "What the hell?" He don't even know he talking to a young OG what the [ __ ] is you you got it Lord you young [ __ ] be bugged out i don't know you might got switch on you but I don't know you might be ready to blame some [ __ ] i have no idea what you got going on but it's spiritual worth it too people be battling the demons [ __ ] people be battling the demons there spiritual warfare low key they could be battling the demons out here and them demons could jump on you through trial going through a lot of trauma a lot of abuse whether it's physical verbal them demons jump on you when you a kid a lot of people don't know that they be jumping on these [ __ ] when they kids bro so they don't really really like technically know what they're doing they got a demon on them gang they don't really know what they're doing they don't so if you older and you understand how the spiritual realm work you at fault this could be a little [ __ ] that got a demon on him and he just don't even know it he got a whole spirit on him so can you really even blame him for acting the way he acting for moving the way he moving can you really blame him no bro you got a demon on him bro you got to understand that bro on some real G [ __ ] bro [ __ ] be battling spirits and [ __ ] it don't really be them for real for real like that's why I look at it different that I'm more wise and I destroyed the ego cuz the ego made me want to say something to him but I understand on a psychological spiritual level that is spiritual warfare a lot of people think it was me doing a lot of that violent stuff that was a demon feeding off that negativity that was never really me it sounds crazy if you're not chosen you don't have a higher intellect a higher level of intelligence it sounds crazy what do you mean that was you that was a demon that was a spirit that was a gin that was never really me about this [ __ ] that I was doing a lot of people don't know Little Jeff y'all think that was him catching hats that was a demon and the demon led him to death cuz they want to kill you [ __ ] y'all think Van was catching them hats that was a demon van used to tell you "I'm a demon." And you look at old pictures of King Vine [ __ ] pictures could catch this [ __ ] on you [ __ ] that's why a lot of pictures of him when he used to be with a lot of his homies his eyes was pure white when a person got a demon on them their eyes reflect light i'm not talking about when they eyes look red i'm talking pure white that's a spirit [ __ ] b was telling I'm a demon he lost his soul young [ __ ] selling your soul in the industry when you doing severe violence to people and hurting people and killing people that connects you directly to the devil to negative energy vine demon let him to death rest in peace little Jeff recipes that came by that didn't learn to control their demon them demons want to set you up to die bro i'm trying to explain this to [ __ ] them demons want to kill you bro they don't give a [ __ ] about you that's why I say you got to like try to learn to live with it it's like the movie Venom cuz if you don't it will destroy you that wasn't Jeff catching all them hats [ __ ] that was the demonic force that was operating using his vessel to destroy people to mislead people so it really was not Jeff doing it you got to understand it from a different spiritual psychological level it wasn't Von doing all that [ __ ] it was a negative spirit that took over his body he was gone already von been dead since he was a kid but you technically dead [ __ ] don't even be realizing it you just see the vessel still alive but the original habit of that body is already gone this [ __ ] is deep bro is lowkey sad the original inhabitance of that body is already gone they're already dead it's like their real soul is in a sunken place they're gone already they've been possessed and took over already that's not the original habit of that body you just see the vessel they're gone i used to be a demon so I could recognize it and I still got that type of spirit but I try to keep it locked up i only use it to help me get stronger in a gym or when I'm doing MMA i don't try to use it to go commit violence on people cuz I understand it should be more spiritual until we get older and more wise and get more wisdom behind this [ __ ] these people be played by demons or sometimes they got multiple demons in them it's called legion sometimes they got multiple demons controlling them sometimes I got seven eight different demons that's seven eight different people living in you cuz all demons and some of these spirits are worth if it's principalities it's nothing but people without bodies it's disembodied spirits when I was on some [ __ ] in 2021 I told you this [ __ ] i went to church something was telling me to go to church i kept feeling like I need to just like go to a godly type of setting and it was a pastor from Africa i'll never forget he kept having his eyes on me after the ceremony right we at church I'm leaving he like I need to talk to you straight African [ __ ] put his hand on my head and he started praying over me he said Lord he don't know that he got principalities powerful [ __ ] spirits that's governing over his body that's trying to destroy him and he started praying to try to get the principalities out of my body that [ __ ] was in tune because he didn't even know that I was wilding in 2021 and this pastor started praying on me it was some African pastor I never seen at the church who straight from Africa and he started saying he kept saying like "I see four principalities connected to him following him i pray they [ __ ] get these principalities." He was doing some like long ass prayer after church was over i was about to leave he just ran like "Yo come here you right there come here you got some principalities attached to you they going to try to destroy you you have some powerful principalities higher than demons and gins and just regular spirits that's why they call principalities they're like princes that dwell in the heavens they move all principles that's why they call principalities there's different principalities that govern certain regions principalities control demons so you got one principality that's running a region of your neighborhood of violence a death he controlling the spirits of premature death which is the spirits that kill people early the principality is the one sending them on missions he has ranking he's like a duke he has ranking it's a ranking system that's why I try to help a lot of the y'all [ __ ] understand that the whole time you think it's you doing a lot of that [ __ ] you might be being plagued by demons more than likely it's not really you you think it's you doing all that [ __ ] it's not so that's why I say you can't really blame a lot of these y bro and I felt like to be honest with you what help manifest the negative energies is not having a healthy balance on top of I was real big back then on third eye doing the kundalini hold my energy taking these supplements I didn't realize it was witchcraft what I was doing that's why I was so [ __ ] angry I'm feeding these demonic spirits these [ __ ] drugs that I'm pumping through my body that's why I feel like bodybuilding is demonic and so many people die bro i'd be sitting here getting scared thinking about all that [ __ ] that I was pumping in my [ __ ] system [ __ ] I was not that was not me bro like I be thinking about that [ __ ] bro just watching bodybuilders [ __ ] died bro that's why I'm cool with sliming down cuz I know when you put up drugs and that [ __ ] is witchcraft you changing your body right before your very eyes you see the [ __ ] flowing through your body when you don't matter that [ __ ] you can see it flowing through your veins you can see it [ __ ] that's magic that's witchcraft bro you You real deal doing witchcraft don't realize it so that's why I tell you it's is pros and cons well this live was not to tell you about all the pros i was speaking about some of the cons that you can deal with if you don't know what you're doing this [ __ ] could lead you down the path of anger and wrath and a rage and have you on some pure [ __ ] out here and you be thinking "Oh I'm normal i got under control." And the whole time you don't the [ __ ] could lead you down a dark ass path oh I'm going to be on seed retention know what come with it the [ __ ] can lead you to demonic forces if you don't have a healthy balance with it you don't really know what you're doing i didn't really know what the [ __ ] I was really doing as a young man i didn't all the way know what the [ __ ] I was doing all I know is I was angry and these negative energies feed off anger depression sadness misery wrath rage they feed off the sins people don't understand a lot of these entities are energy inner like inside you and it will manifest within you the more you indulge in the anger the wrath and you act on it the more you give them access and gateway to your vessel so that's why I said this there pros and cons to this [ __ ] i don't want to hear the surface level information these [ __ ] say i got on TikTok was watching this one [ __ ] live about seed retention oh I've been at the gym and so many girls been on me in front like you saying surface level [ __ ] we don't know that [ __ ] for years [ __ ] y'all [ __ ] saying the surface level [ __ ] y'all don't talk about the dangerous side of this [ __ ] though like how when you holding your sexual energy for a long time it can make you feel very lustful you can feel like your actual sex addiction got worse you feel like your porn addiction is getting worse see they don't tell you that part that's why I know a lot of them is just saying the same regurgitated information so [ __ ] I feel like my [ __ ] sex drive got so [ __ ] high i started feeling crazy inside my body look real deal i started just feeling like I had to get a nut off in some [ __ ] form or fashion i was do porn i was do [ __ ] a [ __ ] i felt crazy i did not feel normal telling you and I did not feel normal at all then I noticed the longer and longer I go now I feel more hitting the three mark three month marking period I feel a lot more chilled than what I did when I was younger cuz it's like I'm a lot more used to it i know what to expect now when I was in my early 20s when I first started doing this [ __ ] I didn't really know all the side effects that come with it like the rage that I was maybe some people different i was feeling a lot of rage a lot of anger a lot of sexual frustration and I knew I wasn't tripping cuz my cousin was telling me when he got out of jail he's like "You ever notice when you go like 2 3 weeks without having sex you just feel more aggressive more that feeling?" I was like "Yeah I never even talked to him about that type of information." He like "That's why I like when I have sex i feel more aggressive i feel more angry bro i feel more tension within me i'm like damn bro day 88 that's good i only hit the three month mark this ain't really like it ain't really [ __ ] i went longer than 3 months but right now me on my third month not going to lie to y'all i did notice my deadlift went up like crazy not going to lie to y'all i did notice I could bench press 315 again for reps like it's nothing i did notice that now I'm back warming up with 275 like it ain't nothing i was just in the gym what did I squat it was only like 515 but I squatted more than that in November 2024 i squatted like 535 with no [ __ ] problem i did notice my strength definitely went up i'm not going to lie to y'all i'm about to go to the gym today and deadlift that's what I'm But I ain't going to deadlift nothing crazy though cuz I plan on having a heavy deadlift this week probably like Wednesday or Thursday so I'm going to save some energy cuz I need to make sure I'm dieting correctly before I just go hop into that heavy weight that's important and make sure that I'm hydrated enough throughout the week so I can be able to perform and lift the weight that I need to i definitely did notice like now I put that energy into honestly getting stronger cuz it's an addiction now to get stronger it's an addiction now but when I was younger on C retention and blast and testosterone [ __ ] that [ __ ] brought me down the dark dark downhill spiral oh god that [ __ ] brought me down a dark dark downhill spiral that [ __ ] brought me down a dark dark downhill spiral and then it used to have me like I swear to God I used to just be arguing with my girl for no [ __ ] reason but I was lowkey bugging out bro and I didn't listen to the one bodybuilder when he warned me that when you take testosterone it enhance who you really are and you tried to warm like if you a [ __ ] that [ __ ] going to amplify it it's going to bring it to the surface [ __ ] that [ __ ] had amplified i promise you that [ __ ] had amplified bro a lot now i feel more chill i feel more calm cuz now me been practicing it for a couple years i'm 29 now i feel more calm and now like that's why I told you I'd be on here chatting with y'all for a while kicking it with y'all cuz it lowkey helped me stay focused and motivated and keep my mind off it and now I'm like [ __ ] it i'm going just go to the gym and go live deadlift come home get on TikTok live i keep myself distracted now and keep putting that life force into the energy to create [ __ ] instead of just using that [ __ ] to just be angry and want to fight and want to be violent n because when you keep on fighting and being violent for no reason you are more of like a animalistic type of mentality you thinking all animal instinct you're not thinking rational because if you going to go down this [ __ ] path [ __ ] you need to be a man and be able to accept what come with it you can't be I was violent just cuz I was on C retention you chose to get on this [ __ ] on top of using testosterone you can't blame nobody but you it's your fault it ain't nobody [ __ ] fault but yours you can't be making no excuses and blaming nobody oh it's cuz I'm on C retention so what you decided to get on it so yeah for me personally blasting SRMS and being on testosterone and not having sex it had me a lot more angry i was not being myself it was an uncontrollable rage I would feel uncontrollable now when I feel that [ __ ] I take it a lot more serious i know it could get dangerous for me now when I feel like my sex drive is super high and I feel like my anger is amplified and I go lift some heavy ass weight now I go hop in the sauna vocing listening to different binaural beasts hop in the hot tub matter fact if the hot tub open today I'm going go hop in the hot tub go hop in the [ __ ] hot tub cool off in the cold water go live on Tik Tok and try to create content Yeah I take that [ __ ] more serious now cuz [ __ ] I know that that [ __ ] can lead me down a dark ass [ __ ] path that I'm scared to go back down i'm lowkey scared of that version because I can't trust that version of me i can't and I honestly feel like the weed was making it worse i'm telling you I honestly feel like the weed was making it worse real deal bro i feel like the weed was making it worse i was talking to my nephew about it and my nephew working in medical field he's like "Well you know you taking all these sirens cuz I was abusing the sirens back then." Like you taking all these sirens top of this testosterone then you smoking is having a chemical reaction in your body bro cuz when I used to smoke on top of taking all the signs testosterone I would feel it in my body instantly now I don't feel it as much so I feel like I be more chill [ __ ] when I was smoking I be off the testosterone i felt it way more the anger literally felt demonic it was not a regular anger felt it way more i'm telling you on my mind way more then on top of this thing I feel like I had roid rage i feel like I was experiencing roid rage like how the trend twins be wilding they young men though they going to go through it if they want to get it under control that's why when I see them doing that I understand from a older from a older young men's point of view i understand why they be so aggressive and wilding out and arguing each other i get it they on testosterone and they on trend like I feel like I experienced royal rage i promise you that anger from hell no it is cuz it come from a demon anger is a demon literally murder come from a different demon depression is a demon these is all names of spirits you learn that [ __ ] in Islam those are spirits them [ __ ] is spirits bro so now I I I take it more serious and not let them spirits control me and manipulate me and have me with a real jaded point of view them [ __ ] is spirits [ __ ] them [ __ ] is spirits and I don't really think a lot of people understand that them shits are spirits bro real [ __ ] i'm telling from a person that lived it you can tell the difference between normal anger and when that [ __ ] is amplified [ __ ] it was real deal Roy rage cuz I would literally take like 60 testosterone boosters i was abusing the [ __ ] out the sirens on top of them on creatine and other supplements and pre-workout [ __ ] y'all don't even understand all that [ __ ] that I was on i could have had a heart attack and died [ __ ] I honestly lowkey feel like and I never take nothing away from it I feel like the weed lowkey kept me alive and I'm saying that to say because when I did research it said that if you got weed moving around your red blood cells and your white blood cells if anything come in your vessel like a potential sickness it attaches to the blood cells in your body but if the weed is already moving around your blood cells it moves the sickness out your body this is why people that SW cancer when they smoke they're able to eat they're able to be more conscious more competent they're able to be more mobile they got more of a [ __ ] diet cuz before I would take all that [ __ ] I would smoke then afterwards I would smoke that's the reason why I personally feel like it potentially didn't like gave me a heart attack or I didn't die or some [ __ ] cuz I'm telling you bro on top of me taking all of that [ __ ] on top of me taking all that [ __ ] I also felt like how can I explain it i was taking a bunch of creatine and different supplements i feel like that [ __ ] could have killed me thank you oh no problem let's start open [Music] yeah that's why I just be trying to just work out now bro just be more of some chill [ __ ] i don't be trying to just like sit there with all that anger and rage everybody just go work out go to It look like it's about to rain that's probably why I might not but it might rain but [ __ ] if it don't I'm just going to go to the gym cuz the gym be like spiritual for real for real you go to that gym it just be like spiritual that's why I probably just about to just go work out type [ __ ] i start feeling better when I work out that's some real [ __ ] cuz [ __ ] that I'm telling you I was experiencing real life roid rage cuz I was abusing SERMS i was abusing testosterone [ __ ] then I'm on sea retention that [ __ ] was evil a real deal experienced real life Roy rage [ __ ] i used to just feel angry all day abnormal angry it was crazy bro it was some psychopath [ __ ] bro i don't I'm telling you that was a dark path I was down that [ __ ] was a dark path I went down that [ __ ] I was experiencing real deal rage i'm telling you I know the difference cuz I don't be feeling like that now bro i was experiencing roy rage [ __ ] i was a [ __ ] i could not make this [ __ ] up [ __ ] i was angry as a [ __ ] abnormally angry that's why I understand why they tell you to take the recommended dosage [ __ ] I was beyond angry and I felt miserable low key i'm be honest with y'all bro i didn't always feel super good i felt miserable a lot of days [ __ ] that [ __ ] start being counterproductive i start feeling down about myself i start feeling like a piece of [ __ ] some days i start literally feeling horrible like when I think back at that that consciousness I was in bro I never want to go back to that cuz I was abusing the testosterone on top of oh let me increase my regular testosterone [ __ ] that [ __ ] felt demonic bro i'm telling you bro even just thinking about it [ __ ] with my mind even just thinking about it to [ __ ] with my mind it had me feeling crazy and on some real [ __ ] bro that [ __ ] did not feel good bro i'm telling you there's levels to this [ __ ] i think I was on the dark side of sea retention be real with y'all i feel like I was on the dark side of it bro i did not feel like a good person like I felt evil like I felt horrible i felt absolutely horrible i did not feel like a good person [ __ ] like [ __ ] I'm I did not feel like a good person [ __ ] like imagine taking all that [ __ ] and then smoking and instantly just feeling evil as hell that's what that [ __ ] used to do yeah I feel like a sociopath when I first did a bro i'm telling you bro on my mama bro that [ __ ] felt evil [ __ ] i never lied to y'all bro that's why I said I switch it up with this video instead of making it like everybody talking about "Oh the pros the pros oh women attraction oh I had more energy man shut your [ __ ] ass up y'all [ __ ] saying the same regurgitated information." I'm warning [ __ ] that if you don't have a healthy balance and get your chakras in line and really be taking that meditation [ __ ] serious and really be realizing that you need to combat that spirit that's within you [ __ ] if you don't learn to control that energy bro the energy will control you bro and you never know it might make your ass a creep it might make your ass a creep i'm telling you this [ __ ] might make your ass a creep that [ __ ] might [ __ ] with your mind if you don't got no self-control [ __ ] and no self-awareness that [ __ ] could [ __ ] with your mind [ __ ] that's why I feel like this [ __ ] is for mature adults only you got to know yourself cuz I'm telling you it had me feeling like I was just objectifying every single woman i would just look at them as an object i would just look at them as an object it's like I didn't even really see the real them all I thought about was "Oh I should [ __ ] her i should sleep with her." I wasn't thinking normal [ __ ] i feel like just over the years of doing it I feel like just over the years of doing it I got better with it but at first [ __ ] first couple years [ __ ] felt like hell that's why I be telling [ __ ] like whatever whoever you are is going to amplify whoever you really are is going to amplify it's going to amplify it you just got to be aware of that that [ __ ] could increase your [ __ ] temper [ __ ] make your temper a lot worse now you good bro i know what you was trying to say [ __ ] that should [ __ ] you be sitting there just mad as hell all damn day ain't nobody did [ __ ] to you you just sitting there mad as sexual object is thoughts about women i'm like bro this [ __ ] is abnormal i'm like [ __ ] I had some days where that [ __ ] was start feeling crazy boy i keep it 100 with you only thing I did notice when I used to go to sleep and wake up I feel real like recharged and feel better but I had a lot of moments where I felt crazy [ __ ] and I remember I was talking about it to this one older [ __ ] that did mad time in jail he was like "Bro just go to sleep like go to sleep you'll wake up feeling better you'll feel different." Cuz I was telling this one older dude I'm like "Bro I feel like I'm experiencing real roy rage bro i feel like this [ __ ] [ __ ] with my mind bro like this [ __ ] frying my brain i feel abnormal and he made it just sound so simple like bro go to sleep when you feeling like that take a nap you'll wake up feeling a lot different you'll wake up feeling better about yourself just go to sleep i'm like damn he's saying it like it's that simple but he was right that's what low-key helped me cuz I go to sleep and the next day I wake up feeling a lot different like that [ __ ] calmed down and I'm be honest with you that [ __ ] be sitting your core bro that's why it's important to be working your abs and [ __ ] real [ __ ] jay you remember the rage when you come out SR intestine arms facts i was just talking about that the whole live remember I was talking to y'all about that in the past the whole live I was just talking about that i was like bro when I was combining that [ __ ] with the testosterone and the signs and then smoking is when you smoke on top of that [ __ ] is literally a chemical reaction you tap into it a lot more i can feel that [ __ ] instantly in my body [ __ ] i felt crazy as hell [ __ ] i'll never lie to you i feel overly aggressive uncontrollable type of rage i did not feel normal [ __ ] that's why I was breaking [ __ ] [ __ ] face like that that's why I was stumping [ __ ] out like that i was putting hands on feeding a lot of [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] that's how I was earning a lot of respect but I don't care about that street respect and all that [ __ ] no more [ __ ] i'm an athlete i don't care about that [ __ ] no more bro that [ __ ] means zero i give a [ __ ] about a blood [ __ ] GD i don't give a [ __ ] about none of that [ __ ] i could give a [ __ ] about the streets and how the streets feel about a [ __ ] i don't give a [ __ ] [ __ ] you [ __ ] this [ __ ] I was real deal on that [ __ ] i don't give a [ __ ] about that street [ __ ] no more [ __ ] as I got older that [ __ ] is not important to me that [ __ ] is honestly a waste of [ __ ] time [ __ ] [ __ ] that street [ __ ] [ __ ] out of here i wasted a lot of years on that [ __ ] [ __ ] oh to have Oh a respectable reputation man i don't give a [ __ ] about that [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] means zero to me now that [ __ ] don't don't mean [ __ ] to me i could care less oh I'm in the streets i'm Man who gives a [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] [ __ ] that's how I feel i don't care about that street [ __ ] i'm over doing all that [ __ ] to have a Yeah like a lot of [ __ ] was respecting me and [ __ ] but [ __ ] that [ __ ] don't mean nothing bro i told you I just ran into my boy Stinky yesterday he was like "Bro you was really me and Stinky used to be together a lot." Like "Bro you was really known for fighting everybody knew." I'm like "Yeah but that [ __ ] don't matter bro this [ __ ] is about family now when you get older bro is about getting you a woman having some children getting some money getting a bag have some success [ __ ] to leave for your [ __ ] children who gives a [ __ ] about oh I'm tough I'm tough and you broke and you regular and you normal and your family still struggling you doing all this for your gang but your real team is your family like how you watch an NFL [ __ ] football [ __ ] team and a [ __ ] basketball [ __ ] team but your real team and which is your family is like broke and [ __ ] up who care about that [ __ ] bro when a real team [ __ ] up and as you get older your priorities change i was telling my I don't care about street [ __ ] no more i don't care about that reputation [ __ ] no more i give a [ __ ] nowadays if a [ __ ] a snitch a rat a [ __ ] a hitter a killer a slider I don't give a damn cuz I don't give a [ __ ] about streets no more it's not normal at all average people that earn a something should not be boosting testosterone in my opin exactly life is about relationship with family and people bro that's facts i don't care about that [ __ ] no more bro that [ __ ] is unimportant to me now i don't give a damn [ __ ] i'm an athlete now i could give a [ __ ] less oh this nigga's a rat this [ __ ] I don't give a [ __ ] [ __ ] i'm not in the streets no more [ __ ] i could give a [ __ ] i don't give a [ __ ] i'm out the streets now i don't give a [ __ ] about no rat no snitch give a [ __ ] about no tough guy no slider no hitter that [ __ ] don't mean nothing bro life is about getting some money leaving a legacy getting some success i done left a lot of [ __ ] like this i left a a lot of [ __ ] like this in the street and I done told y'all [ __ ] that happened to me i done got jumped i done had times that I turned down some phase and I ain't fight some [ __ ] [ __ ] i had some times where I done turned some [ __ ] down i got junk i had [ __ ] that have made me lowkey feel intimidated i'm just not scared to say it i don't felt fear i feel like I was scared majority of the time that's why I was so violent cuz I was scary i keep it a 100 with you i don't had [ __ ] crying like this you know I don't had [ __ ] crying you know I had that [ __ ] crying having a mental breakdown i don't have [ __ ] ass [ __ ] crying already i don't had [ __ ] ass [ __ ] crying you know i done had ho ass [ __ ] crying and [ __ ] you know I done made [ __ ] [ __ ] cry out here in these streets facts you know you know I don't had [ __ ] having mental breakdowns they think we forgot yeah they think we forgot yeah I had [ __ ] ass [ __ ] crying at home ass [ __ ] you thought we forgot how is this crying like that yeah yeah i don't been jumped got jumped by the police got jumped by the Hopkin [ __ ] got jumped by my nephew uncles i got jumped and I got my [ __ ] split open somebody hit me with a [ __ ] weapon right my mother [ __ ] face and snuffed they snuck me all I seen white flash from my face split my whole [ __ ] nose open hell yeah i done got clapped at [ __ ] letting off [ __ ] yeah i had [ __ ] try to clap at me [ __ ] yeah oh yeah so I was just making somebody everything was all good [ __ ] hell no i ain't going to see her cap in my rap now i [ __ ] had [ __ ] ass [ __ ] try to take a [ __ ] the [ __ ] up behind the [ __ ] they was doing that's the part these [ __ ] be scared to tell you about i had [ __ ] blow at me that [ __ ] ain't no fun [ __ ] try to say "Oh you scared getting shot at and you really ain't this you really ain't that." [ __ ] I don't care what no [ __ ] say getting shot at is scary these [ __ ] be living in a delusional land [Music] i don't give a damn what these [ __ ] talking about bro [ __ ] make that [ __ ] not scary [ __ ] i done been clap at that [ __ ] scary i don't care what [ __ ] tell you these [ __ ] act like this [ __ ] real deal like video game even though it kind of is we simulation but that [ __ ] scary i don't care what you [ __ ] tell me that [ __ ] get scary [ __ ] i'm just keeping it 100 with y that [ __ ] get scary [ __ ] i'm not going to say a lie there like a dumb [ __ ] that [ __ ] definitely get scary bro i'm just keeping it 100 with y'all bro that [ __ ] get scary that [ __ ] definitely get scary bro be honest with you that [ __ ] is scary [ __ ] you can damn know [ __ ] say I had three shooters let up three switches in front of me last year trying to [ __ ] take a [ __ ] but they wasn't aiming at me they was really trying to get my cousins [ __ ] that [ __ ] get real [ __ ] i don't give a damn what no [ __ ] tell you that [ __ ] get real [ __ ] these [ __ ] tell you some fairy tale [ __ ] only want to tell you the good that happened to you nah [ __ ] [ __ ] snuff me tried to get down on me [ __ ] [ __ ] you talking about i was talking about some of that [ __ ] last night i got [ __ ] jumped a couple goddamn times [ __ ] the [ __ ] you mean [ __ ] that [ __ ] get [Music] scary what the [ __ ] this [ __ ] drunk as hell that early yeah they got that like so I was just talking about [ __ ] good [ __ ] and I got [ __ ] somebody [ __ ] I never forget somebody that [ __ ] I don't know how I'm alive somebody [ __ ] stabbed me in my temple before everything just went black i was woke up in the hospital i don't even remember that [ __ ] i don't even remember that [ __ ] to be honest with you be honest keep it all in thousands with you i don't remember it so I can't say that it hurt it know none of that all I know is I just woke up in the hospital don't know I'm alive all right [ __ ] real deal try to [ __ ] killed me i got set up by a woman one time and I was at her [ __ ] house she bust my head open facts facts bust my [ __ ] wide open [ __ ] had me [ __ ] leaking i ran out the [ __ ] house i was at a shorty house before and she lowkey was a op and I didn't know that it was a setup and I was in her [ __ ] house the [ __ ] [ __ ] picked up a [ __ ] pen or some [ __ ] and smacked me in the face out of nowhere me and my nephews over there i ran out her [ __ ] house oh yeah hell yeah [ __ ] i was at a [ __ ] house when I was about 15 14 i was like 15 out of nowhere her [ __ ] mom and her mom boyfriend came over her mom boyfriend start trying to fight me had to back out the pimp blade on him run down on that [ __ ] yeah I done been in some very compromising situation where the shoe wasn't always on my [ __ ] foot [ __ ] i got robbed by two [ __ ] I thought was cool i asked some [ __ ] that I was from the hood send me some fake work before i had a lot of [ __ ] [ __ ] try me too like that's what come with it when you want to be [ __ ] tough you got to understand [ __ ] you going to deal with your karma [ __ ] i don't think a lot of these [ __ ] understand that cuz that's the energy you putting out there [ __ ] it's a boomerang and the crazy thing is when them [ __ ] robbed me like a year and a half two years before that I just robbed these other [ __ ] out some weed then I get robbed out some weed [ __ ] hell yeah then I got robbed out some [ __ ] weed [ __ ] what the [ __ ] i thought I was the [ __ ] [ __ ] then this [ __ ] happened to me i was pissed as hell [ __ ] [ __ ] happened to me i ain't like it when I was doing it it was cool [ __ ] happen to me [ __ ] i ain't [ __ ] like it [ __ ] so yeah yeah it's pros and cons with that [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] it wasn't always peaches and [ __ ] cream [ __ ] i have [ __ ] back door me trying to get a [ __ ] [ __ ] set up oh so yeah bro hell yeah there pros and cons with that [ __ ] [ __ ] lifestyle [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] that street [ __ ] don't matter to me no more that gang making [ __ ] has hold zero weights i don't give a [ __ ] if it didn't give it to me i'm the biggest blood i'm the biggest [ __ ] i'm the biggest Latin king bro i don't care bro that [ __ ] don't matter to me bro that's why I went to jail last year and all these bloods was trying to talk all this blood [ __ ] to like but I don't care about that [ __ ] bro i don't care about being on [ __ ] blood no more bro the [ __ ] you talking about i'm about to be 30 years old i don't give a [ __ ] about that [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] sound ridiculous to me to be honest with you i don't give a [ __ ] i honestly let a lot of [ __ ] go to a lot of [ __ ] I have beef with i let a lot of [ __ ] go for real for real to be honest with you [ __ ] i was catching ops this year last year i ain't say nothing to them [ __ ] i caught a in the gym last year around this time last year around this time i ain't seen him at the gym since could have beat the dog [ __ ] out of him could have beat the dog [ __ ] out of him cuz I caught him by himself cuz they was getting into my cousins and I came on a block and he was acting like he was clutching and I had it on me and he was acting like he was clutching while he was talking to me that was a form of disrespect to me so I caught him in the gym last summer i kept working out right by him just staring at him i'm not going to lie i was thinking like should I pop on this [ __ ] but then I'm like I'm on probation [ __ ] godamn whatever oh I forgot about a [ __ ] victim i forgot about another victim what's this like 17 my ex-girlfriend uncle but we ain't going to get into that you know what happened [ __ ] was talking crazy cuz I got into an argument with her at her grandma house and her grandma ended up calling him i forgot all about this [ __ ] and like a couple weeks later I came back in December 2021 caught him standing in front of their house when I was riding by and I hopped out the [ __ ] V i told you I be forgetting [ __ ] while out here it is what it is bro [ __ ] [ __ ] it is what it [Music] is [ __ ] it is what it is ended up chasing him down he tried to shut the door on me and I end up punching through the [ __ ] door and [ __ ] my hand up this is a long story it is what it is though [ __ ] [ __ ] it [ __ ] [ __ ] happens it is what it is [ __ ] i forgot all about that [ __ ] [ __ ] i hopped off the beat [ __ ] seen me he start woofing i start running towards [ __ ] ran to the house that [ __ ] tried to shut the [ __ ] door and I just punched through that [ __ ] it [ __ ] my hand up [ __ ] my [ __ ] hand up [ __ ] forgot all about that [ __ ] [ __ ] my goddamn hand up and my [ __ ] hand split wide open [ __ ] i didn't even mean to do that [ __ ] and I was leaking mad [ __ ] blood [ __ ] mad [ __ ] blood that [ __ ] was dumb though why would that [ __ ] burn anyone be all the way real with you 98% of the [ __ ] that I did I wish I did not do it to keep it 100 with you cuz I was still programmed by the matrix that I had to be bad i was a demon i used to embrace oh I'm a demon or I'm evil i knew what I was doing was demonic i knew what I was doing i be possessed by the devil i just think it was cool like what type of dumb ass want to wake up and be with the devil how stupid are you who just wakes up and just choose evil want to dwell in darkness you [ __ ] dweller who just wakes up and want to be on the dark side bro that's literally [ __ ] when you think about it it's really [ __ ] when you really think about it who just wakes up and want to be on the dark side like it don't even make sense bro when you think about it who just wakes up and want to be in the dark side bro I'm about to get up bro i need to go to the gym i just want to tell yall some of the cons to that [ __ ] bro don't be misled by that [ __ ] bro just pros and cons that come with that [ __ ] just be careful [ __ ] i'm about to go to gym real quick i might go live while I'm there i got to hurry up because it is Sunday i'm [ __ ] be closing early about to fake just hurry up type [ __ ] cuz today is Sunday [ __ ] i do need to get a workout in i stayed on here a lot longer than I was supposed to i was supposed to then go to the gym i gotta go put this energy to lifting