nobody british empire the dark ages the islamic gold age happening at the same time kids on their last day of child labour [Music] emperor augustus when emperor septemberus walks in henry viii when he meets his new child did they send me daughters when i asked four sons americans have no history america existed before europeans discovered it dinosaurs get freaking wiped out small mammals well i guess i'm in charge now [Music] hannibal readying armament for the second punic war where's my elephant the us trying its best to stay out of world war ii japan let's go poke it with a stick arabs in 1948 come on israel you're outnumbered israel a seven nation army couldn't hold me back yugoslavia europe is imperialist soviet union the us is imperialist ussr is imperialist you can't just go around calling everybody imperialist although outnumbered the romans mustered 50 000 infantry with 10 000 cavalry on the wings the king launched his campaign with an army of approximately 46 men including 13 knights and his friend godfrey when you had an argument with your neighbor and he is irish [Music] 1908 oh wow there's a lot of oil in persia britain and france bringing romans forward in time expectation what the frick oh that that's just an attack helicopter nothing special pretty outdated by our standards reality you have 30 seconds to explain why germans still exist genghis khan on father's day hector realizing he didn't kill a killers but someone else instead history books basically world war one everything in between world war ii vikings were chads who didn't respect women and treated them as expendable how were viking culture women treated for this point in history however viking women enjoyed a high degree of social freedom they could own property ask for a divorce if not treated properly and they shared responsibility for running farms and homesteads with their men folk they were also protected by law from a range of unwanted male attention the pope you're excommunicated until you go on a crusade frederick ii so i talked with the sultan and he agreed to give us back jerusalem without a fight the pope what the f how dare you not fight the heathen and negotiate without the church's support frederick ii why are you booing me i retook the holy land lol napoleon was short while i understand why you may have labored under this misapprehension you are in fact incorrect true in fact he was of an above average height thank you i'm glad to be part of a community that values both historical accuracy and civil discourse prophets you shouldn't do that anointed kings does that profits achilles i'm invincible nothing can stop me five minutes later oh my ankle 1915 general watching 100 000 of their men get cut down in 0.02 seconds even the terrible when even the wonderful walks in the u.s defeats spain and claims cuba guam puto rico and the philippines as colonial holdings the united kingdom yeah i'm a descendant of genghis khan vampires in the media are weakened by christian relics like holy water the muslims who killed the real dracula vlad [Music] greek muslim being deported to turkey turkish christian being deported to greece you admit defeat in the american revolution because george washington will go mad with power become a dictator and then they'll beg to have you back george washington willingly gives up power japan when someone suggests it should apologize for atrocities in world war ii did the past really happen attractive girl turns 14 zeus [Music] americans wow i can't believe what the soviets did the errol see they are so dumb also americans when someone asks them what happened to the largest lake west of the mississippi senators be like the republic is weak and corrupt my brother in jupiter you accepted the bribes christians all throughout history when they see a non-religious person savages savages barely even human christians all throughout history when they see a person of a different religion savages savages barely even human christians all throughout history when they see another christian with an or 0.5 percent difference in belief savages savages barely even human imagine training your whole life as a warrior for an elite unit than dying from a slinged rock this post was made by the testudo gang when they insists on using bce and ce instead of bc and ad oh right the common era the era that is common the name chosen specially for the era that started around the up event italian troops in 1870 besieged the vatican pope whoever orders the assault will be excommunicated that one jewish soldier you have no power here ancient architects when they find the absolute worst freaking land available and decide it's perfect for building a city it ain't much but it's honest work wait the second oldest civilization in the world is in peru always has been you can't just control 25 percent of the earth observe canada protecting black people from slave catchers mexico encouraging slaves to run away and guaranteeing their freedom the south keeve and russ were russian kiev and russ were ukrainian even russ predate modern notions of nationality even russ were swedes wow how did you get like that every time the sun sets on the british empire i do one push up jesus christ i should infect an eight-year-old kid with cow pox to see if he can survive smallpox later [Music] we conquered central asia for the working class for allah you guys needed a reason britain we are exhausted from seven years war so we are going to raise your taxes temporarily so we can recover 13 colonies the frick you are americans in the 13 colonies after the declaration of an independent republic the french checking their treasury after massive funding towards defeating britain coupled with growing republican unrest [Music] germany domestically like go ahead tell me about the treaty of versailles i'm all ears are you two brothers jesus christ no hong kong yes copy paste some crab that already exists for the 47th time make up a new unique name settlers naming new u.s towns trade offer i get your land and natural resources you get aircraft named after your tribe brits normally on cinco de mayo brits when they realize cinco de mayo celebrates the french empire losing to some mexican farmers ashoka the cruel when ashoka the peaceful walks in i love honey but you know what i don't love the english since the pegasus is a bastard child of poseedon the disney movie hercules is about two cousins going on adventures the pegasus is also the uncle of the little mermaid until we meet again the sun never sets on the british empire because it never rises yeah we kicked you brits out of america planning to build the largest empire in the history of the world austria italy 1866 treaty of vienna france gets venice because if you lol athens tennessee world war ii veterans after the sheriff holds a fraudulent election so anyway i started blasting megalodon when the isthmus of panama formed they couldn't migrate between the atlantic and pacific any longer which they depended on for food guess i'll die british officer my old look a foreign army is joining the colonials british general do not be stupid gentlemen what silly nation would be ready to lose so much time and money just to threaten our inter france me napoleon wasn't even that short british people first off get out of here with your facts [Music] henry viii's wives if they'd never met him ancient civilizations whenever they get a natural disaster from the gods that one norwegian dude holding the bridge the saxon army trying to cross the stamford bridge every military commander in history watching castle defenders use flaming arrows in movies the renaissance 1300 to 1600 rich noble family the rival rich noble family renaissance artists homies talk mad crap till you start breaking them on the wheel cars invented in 1886 first airplane flight just 17 years later wright brothers man-made objects in space just 54 year later sputnik when the test shows you're 15 japanese but your family never left vietnam romans seeing another civil war after just a few years of peace soviet union slide to the left germany slide to the right grave robbers you aren't a doctor why do constantly ask us to get you dead bodies benjamin franklin i need you to not ask too many questions earth spinning at one revolution per day look what they need to mimic a fraction of our power why hasn't anyone ever successfully invaded russia mongol empire henry the impotent when henry the giant throbbing erects clan comes in when you've just overthrown the aztec empire with the spaniards but suddenly they start calling you subjects instead of allies babe it's time for your indemnity payments that you owe even though you won your freedom with blood we sherry when you have no male air so you decide to just pretend your 14 year old daughter is a dude medieval problems require medieval solutions modern democracy thank you for saving my life mana carter i literally don't care for anyone else other than rich landlords stalin goes seeing american college communists praising him despite having murdered millions of people when he was alive they love me you like spartans because they were strong and powerful i like spartans because they were completely crazy we are not the same thank you for watching this video tune in at 5 p.m british time for a video of changing topic and at 7 pm for daily juicy memes check out my discord server using the link in the description also be sure to leave a like if you enjoyed the video and subscribe if you didn't already