Hi guys! Welcome back to my channel and if you're new, welcome to my channel. My name is Stephanie Yates, Anya Buile, Steph Anya for short and I'm a licensed associate marriage and family therapist.
Today's video is for my fellow therapists and those who are thinking of becoming therapists because we'll be going through a very popular model, narrative therapy. If you want a refresher on narrative therapy or find out more about what that is, please stay tuned. okay so I want to start the video with a couple of shout outs first shout out to my subscriber who requested specifically a tutorial on narrative therapy after seeing my structural therapy video I love doing these so if you have any other specific requests please let me know and also a shout out to my best friend Rachel she got me a shirt that says what's on your mind I don't know how well you guys can see that but how cute with the logo and everything. She is the best, so had to wear it. Okay, so let's jump into narrative therapy.
Narrative therapy, I think a couple of years ago, it was really, really popular. As popular as right now CBT is, I feel like we, just like with anything else, the faves and fashions and trends of models and right now CBT is what everybody's asking about. Do you practice CBT which is cognitive behavioral therapy? I have a video where I touch on the basics of CBT and some of the most common cognitive distortions so if you're interested in that I do have a video on it. But narrative therapy when I was in graduate school this was a very popular model.
And by the time I was getting into my internship, Solution Focus became, I would say, the most popular model. So if you're curious about that as well, let me know and I'd be happy to do a video. So narrative therapy, it was developed by Michael White and David Epstein, one of those models that is postmodern.
If you watched my structural therapy video, that video talks about how structural therapy is a classical model. And our classical models are the models that were developed really in like the 60s and 70s, those earliest marriage and family therapy models. The postmodern models, most of them came from like the mid 80s onward. And it's really this idea of getting rid of the idea of the therapist as an expert, recognizing how our social world informs the way we view the world, behave in the world.
It's called social constructionism. So how we view, for example, what's considered healthy and so we back away from that now you know if you're working with someone from a different cultural background you might not be best equipped to tell them what healthy looks like in a family and a fun fact my model choice collaborative therapy is actually considered to be a branch of narrative therapy so even though this is not the model that i practice most predominantly i have a lot of respect for it um and i think that this is a wonderful for working with families, individuals, and couples. If you're looking for one line that summarizes narrative therapy, this quote is the best and it's one of the closest outlined in my AATBS materials. I talked about how I used AATBS to pass my National Marriage and Family Therapy exam if you're curious about what AATBS is, but I do reference AATBS a lot. when I do my model reviews, diagnosis reviews, it helps me have like a little bit of an anchor for what to focus on in the video.
So here's the quote that they have, Our sense of reality is organized and maintained through the stories by which we circulate knowledge about ourselves and the world that we inhabit. And I think that pretty much summarizes narrative therapies that our lives when you really think about it the way we view things it's through the lens of stories a lot of times the way we even think about our childhood especially like infanthood it's through the stories that other people tell us how did our parents get together were we a a child that was created on purpose were we an accident were we the result of trauma all those things even before we are in existence matter those stories shape the way we view ourselves and our importance in the world and narrative therapy focuses on that and helping people to construct a story about themselves where they're not the victim. So the idea is that our personal experiences are for the most part very ambiguous and so we tell ourselves stories to make sense of our experiences.
So for example, if you have somebody that's getting married, if you've only seen marriage through the lens of everybody you've ever seen get married ends up divorced you're gonna be very skeptical at that wedding you're gonna be looking at that marriage as a scam it's something that you don't necessarily have high confidence in because you see it where it wasn't the happily ever after. Whereas if you're the kind of person who has really indulged in let's say romantic novels or maybe your parents are still together or maybe you've experienced a beautiful love story, that wedding experience is going to be completely different for you. So because you both were at the same event and witnessing the same thing doesn't mean you walk away with the same take on it. So our internal stories, the way that we make sense of our experiences is very... critical to I would say our overall happiness and our optimism and hope and like I was saying with the wedding example our perceptions are completely constructed by our social world if you came in a world where everybody looks down on marriage for example you're not going to value marriage as this amazing thing more than likely unless you're rebelling against what you were brought up with whereas if everybody you know is pushing for marriage then you're gonna look at it as milestone and it goes beyond just our family experiences right culturally you know what are we seeing in the media like I mentioned seeing those movies what is being preached in our churches what about our communities do we know a lot of married people what is pushed in society so in the US for example you know you're going to see a lot of depictions of monogamous relationships where there are two people committed to one another whereas in other cultures polygamy might be more of a social norm So the way we view things and the stories that we create are highly affected by our social world and that's what I mean when I say social constructionism is a major part of narrative therapy.
Now here is a very important aspect of narrative therapy, something that I definitely do use in my practice and that is this view of the problem as separate from the people. I was just talking to a client about this recently. When you are in a position where you view a person as a problem or view yourself as a problem, that's very hard to overcome because in your mind you're going to already feel pre-defeated like I can't change this person or I can't change myself. But if we separate that problem from the person. Let's say you have a person who has cheated in a relationship, right?
Now, if you choose to stay with that person, then trust becomes the problem. A lack of trust is the problem. Not that person per se, but a lack of trust. And you partner with that person in building the trust in the relationship. So communicate with each other.
Say, we have this threat, this challenge of trust not existing in the relationship. how can we partner together to eradicate that problem or lessen it so you could talk about will it be helpful for me to be able to see your location for example or it would be helpful for me to know everyone that you're talking to on the phone i would like to be introduced i would like to feel that i'm a part of your world establishing what youtube will team up to do together against that problem narrative therapy is huge on externalizing the problem from the people And I think that's very key to getting out of a blaming cycle and dynamic within relationships. The therapy goal is to make your life stories more satisfying, to make them less problem infused. You know, we want to see more victories. We want to see you as the victor, not the villain or the victim in your story.
We want to see how can you overcome that challenge instead of sitting in the problem. Maybe we can create a plan and talk about your progress and how in the past you struggled with that and now look at you. So creating a story that's not so saturated by problems and negativity.
So now let's jump into the process and techniques of narrative therapy. So the first step is to describe the problem and the way I would do that is what brings you into therapy? What made you feel that you needed to come to therapy? And this is where we can start introducing that concept of externalizing the problem.
They say you know he's always yelling at me and they say okay so you all are having a problem with yelling so instead of he's always yelling just saying yelling has become a problem and then exploring that further why is yelling such a problem because for some other people it wouldn't be so understanding where those triggers come from so you know maybe being triggered about childhood experiences is a problem in the relationship so being able to externalize those problems that's the first thing we're going to describe the problem and externalize it then we map the effects of that problem let's understand how that problem affects individuals how does this problem affect the family as a whole and then let's flip it how do these family members or individuals affect the problem right so if If you have a problem with anxiety, for example, anxiety is a problem in this relationship. Now, how do certain family members contribute to you feeling anxious or contribute to the family feeling anxious? What do you do that exacerbates that?
It could be something as simple as drinking coffee in the morning exacerbates your anxiety. So, how can we replace that need for coffee? and substitute it with something else okay so it's a lot about understanding the problem not only how the problem affects everybody but how does everybody contribute to that problem too so that's what mapping the problem looks like and you also especially with mapping out the problem you need to understand how that problem looks different in different contexts you could have those different family members who you know if you guys are at church everything's cool you seem like you get along great everybody idolizes your family or your relationship but then at home maybe it's a completely different story so you know understanding the public versus private sector you know are there certain environments that are making the problem be bigger than what it has to be so understanding how it differs in different contexts as well and I also as part of this like to understand how things are different when you take different people out of the equation or add different people into the equation So maybe brother and sister only fight when grandma's around. Why is that?
You know, understanding what are the different situations where this problem is seeming a lot bigger and also when does it seem lessened. That's a huge part of mapping out the problem as well. So then after you map out the problem, you want to evaluate that problem and understand, maybe justify how that problem is a positive thing for some and maybe a negative thing for others.
Let's use... alcoholism as an example okay alcoholism is the problem for the person who's drinking they're relaxing their nerves they're trying to address the stress of their day but for the people experiencing them once they're drunk perhaps this is actually challenging their relationship so understanding how does it affect your goals how does it affect your productivity how does it affect your peace of mind so evaluating the negative and positive effects of those problems. Then another concept that's popularized through narrative therapy is identifying unique outcomes.
So I like to think of this sometimes even exceptions to the problem. I know you guys have this big story about dad being an alcoholic and that causing a lot of issues. When is it not an issue or when are you able to ignore it or when does it actually make you guys you know have more fun? Not lessening or invalidating the experience but what we're trying to do is bring even those little things to the forefront so the exceptions to when you guys are having those issues and this way we can understand you know the full spectrum and the opportunities for reframing that story because if the story has always been dad's an alcoholic so our family is terrible and then we start exploring a little bit more about when that's not the case That can give us more insight into the opportunity to reframe that story.
And that takes us to the next part, which is re-storying. So re-storying is really about infusing more optimism and hope and confidence sometimes into that family dominant story. You work with the family to help them create an alternative storyline.
So instead of focusing on how your life was so negatively impacted by your father's drinking, Maybe you talk about your ability to overcome that and how you were still able to graduate from high school. You still were able to develop good relationships. You've had your own stable relationship. You use that as a way of not even drinking so that you don't become dependent on alcohol. So using these unique outcomes, giving them meaning, helping your story be more positive and more hopeful is really the ultimate goal of narrative therapy.
So that restoring... process is one of the things that will come towards the end of therapy once you've really ascertained everything about that problem and understand about opportunities to view it in a different way. The therapist is viewed as a co-author of the client's story and you want to avoid thinking for the client, right?
So I'm not going to suggest, oh look at it this way. A therapist's main tool in narrative therapy is by asking questions. And again, this really emphasizes that the therapist is not necessarily an expert.
You're just kind of more of a guide. So you're asking questions that lead the process, but the clients are the ones who are providing the answers and content for the session. There are a lot of different types of questions that you can ask in narrative therapy. One of my favorite types of questions is deconstruction questions, which is really understanding Why you had a certain feeling about this problem for example so if you're dealing with resentment you know what experiences in the past informed you on what resentment looks like what resentment is have you ever seen someone else be resentful have you ever felt that someone was resentful towards you those different things that help us understand why you view a situation the way that you view it another thing I love about narrative therapy that I honestly haven't used is therapeutic letters where a therapist will basically write a letter to the client kind of covering everything they've been doing in therapy.
So you're even creating a narrative about the therapy process itself, which is teaching them how to do that. I do that with my clients more verbally. I don't write out letters.
We'll just kind of talk about, well, remember when you were doing XYZ and just kind of covering the progress that they've made because it can be so hard to see progress when you're living it. But my job as a therapist is to pay attention to that for you. And some therapists in narrative therapy get as creative as creating certificates and awards for different milestones in therapy. You can basically really start showing those victorious moments.
You know, wow, looks like you were able to really establish a boundary here, for example. Or you really found an effective solution to the problem you came. in the first place with and giving out certificates that the it feels tangible this victory and the client can feel success and progress and start building on their hope and optimism so it's all about understanding the stories or narratives that a family or a couple or an individual brings into the session understanding the problem narrative understanding how that problem has impacted their life how they learned how to view that problem, how they've navigated that problem, exceptions to the problem, and ultimately creating a story that doesn't have as many problems in it. And helping them see themselves through a new lens by paying attention to their resilience, their creativity, their ability to overcome the problems that seem to have plagued them in the way they view themselves or their family.
So narrative therapy is a very, very inspiring approach. to therapy I love it I love to see it in action a good tool to have in your toolbox that's my assessment of narrative therapy I hope that you found this useful I'll be found the examples useful I said you like this video subscribe to my channel click the bell notification so you know every time I upload and be sure to share this video with a friend that you think could find it useful so that way they can let me know the videos that they would find helpful as well I appreciate you for watching until the end of the video. That really, really helps me. Thank you.