1950s Dating Culture

Jul 27, 2024

1950s Dating Culture

Introduction

  • Focusing on 1950s American dating culture.
  • Misconception that 1950s dating was more serious and clear-cut compared to today.
  • Many aspects of 1950s dating are similar to modern dating.

Dating as a Pastime

  • In the 1950s, dating was often a casual, social activity.
  • Young people dated multiple partners and could date their friends' partners.
    • "Your Dating Days" (1954) describes modern casual dating as recreation.
  • Importance of knowing many people to better understand one's ideal partner.

Teen Dating Culture

  • Most advice and material from the 1950s focuses on teens and young adults.
  • Casual dating was highly common among high school and college students.
  • Going steady meant exclusivity but wasn’t always permanent.
  • Exchange of rings and pins signified going steady.
  • Ending a steady relationship was common and informal.

Dating Advice and Social Expectations

  • Parents often encouraged teens to date many people before settling down.
  • Dating advice columns like those from "Boy Loves Girl" provided guidance.
  • Communication norms and gender expectations: boys asked girls out, but girls could ask boys to dances and would have to pay.
  • Importance of being clean, tidy, and socially skilled.

Social Activities and Physical Affection

  • Dates often included activities like bowling, skating, and diner outings.
  • Terms for physical activities:
    • Kissing: regular and more casual.
    • Necking: more passionate kissing, possibly leading to hickeys.
    • Petting: could range from cuddling to more intimate actions.
    • Parking: private time in cars, usually involving some form of physical affection.
    • Getting fresh: a boy being too forward, often blamed on the girl.

Modern and Historical Similarities

  • Modern issues like ghosting and casual attitudes towards relationships existed in the 1950s.
  • Many 1950s dating tips remain relevant today: be yourself, be confident, and have interests.

Race and Societal Norms

  • Interracial and interfaith relationships were discouraged due to societal challenges.

Engagements and Marriage

  • Engagements typically lasted 6 months to a year, with around one-third ending before marriage.
  • Breaking off engagements was advised over entering a bad marriage.
  • Rebounds were common but generally not advised for successful marriages.
  • Ideal marriage ages: men 25, women 21, usually followed by a one-year engagement.

Financial Management in Marriages

  • Wives often controlled household finances, even if legally the money was the husband's property.

Conclusion

  • Some aspects of 1950s dating (like casual dating) might be beneficial today.
  • However, normalized infidelity and unclear relationship statuses were problematic.
  • Similarities between 1950s and modern dating highlight unchanging human social behaviors.