Overview
The discussion explores common mistakes men make when flirting, techniques for effective flirting, psychological differences in dating preferences, and advice on becoming more attractive to women.
Common Flirting Mistakes
- Many men treat dates like business meetings, focusing on intellectual rather than emotional or sexual connections.
- Men often fail to flirt altogether, leading to being seen as only "nice guys."
- Poor body language, such as closed posture and lack of eye contact, hinders effective flirting.
Effective Flirting Techniques
- Adopt open body language: maintain good posture, shoulders back, and direct eye contact.
- Speak clearly and confidently; how you communicate often matters more than what you say.
- Aim for about three genuine compliments during a one-to-two-hour first date, spaced naturally.
- Compliments should not be solely about appearance and should avoid being manipulative or insincere.
Approach to Compliments and Emotional Connection
- Avoid backhanded compliments or "negging," as they can be manipulative and make women feel bad.
- Flirting should create emotional engagement without resorting to negative tactics.
- Women often sense insincerity or ulterior motives in compliments.
Male and Female Dating Psychology Differences
- Men tend to overestimate how much women care about their looks; women prioritize other factors.
- Women’s attraction is rarely based solely on a man’s appearance, in contrast to typical male preferences.
Being a "High Value" Man
- High status is attractive, which means having ambition, goals, and interests beyond work or fitness.
- Women look for men with a trajectory, interests, and future plans, not just financial success.
Self-Improvement and Attractiveness
- Men can improve their "score" by building a life they're proud of, developing interests, and maintaining self-care.
- First impressions matter: being well-groomed and in reasonable shape is important, even if six-pack abs are not required.
Perceptions on Physical Attractiveness
- "Dad bods" do not necessarily receive more attention, but extreme fitness does not guarantee outsized results.
- Some speculate women prefer partners who are less competitive in the dating market, though this is not widely discussed among women.
- Both partners may feel more comfortable maintaining reasonable fitness within a relationship.
Recommendations / Advice
- Focus on creating both emotional and intellectual connections on dates.
- Use confident body language and sincere compliments.
- Develop personal interests and long-term goals to appear high-status and attractive.
- Maintain good grooming and reasonable fitness for positive first impressions.