hey everyone so a few months ago I was laid off by Google finally on Valentine's Day this year I wasn't ready to share back then because to be honest I was feeling quite devastated by the way that I had to leave my dream job at Google so now that some time has passed I'm ready to share with you five harsh lessons that I've learned throughout this layoff experience so that you can mentally prepare yourself if you're going through something similar the first lesson that I've learned is that it is really not your fault so when I was was being laid off everyone around me was telling me not to take it personally that it was just a company decision but I couldn't help myself thinking if only I've did this or if only I prevented that which is why the first few nights I really couldn't sleep it was only after a friend in HR explained to me that the objective of a layoff is to save cost and it's just unfortunate that my job was part of the cost that they wanted to save so if you're going through a layoff right now I want to assure you that it is really not your fault and it had nothing to do with your performance also speaking as a people manager who has hired and fired people before if you were indeed performing poorly the company would have just fired you because it would have been cheaper and less impact to the overall company morale the second lesson is that the layoff process was never going to be fair because a layoff has nothing to do with a poor performance the opposite could happen as well and that is you're being laid off even though you're a good performer and a lawyer employee and that feeling of unfairness it will start to grow and eat you inside when you start to notice the less experienced employees or less essential teams were less impacted and you start thinking hey I contributed more to this company in my case I worked in Google for the last 8 years in a sales team covering Singapore we had a lot of talented people from all over the world working in that team so I had to climb the ranks and I'm proud to say that eventually I was promoted as the only Singaporean man manager in that team in some sense you could say that I was feeling entitled because every other leader in my team was not originally from Singapore and I had the most local knowledge that's why I was so shocked to find out that I was also laid off now don't get me wrong Google treated me in the most professional way I'm just saying that the layoff can you feel illogical and your loyalty and your years of experience does not entitle you to feeling fair throughout this whole process after a layoff is it's also common for you to see CEOs get paid millions in bonuses because they have helped the company save so much money the managers that laid you off they may also subsequently get promoted because they displayed strong leadership during a tough layoff period so all of this can feel really unfair and I really struggled to accept it it was only after a career Mentor reminded me that just like in life there are different rules for different people and the layoff is no different some of us are lucky some of us are not so it's best just to not take it personally and move on lesson number three is to be kind to yourself and others because layoffs are ultimately out of your control the only thing that's within our control is to be kind be kind to yourself and know that you did your best and give yourself the time to grief and recover in my case I pride myself as a go-getter so the moment I was laid off I jump straight into problem solving mode applications interviews I was just diving straight into it and looking back that wasn't really very healthy a job is a big deal because it's a big part of your identity and when that identity that you hold so dearly gets ripped away from you there's always going to be trauma I also want to encourage you to be kind to others especially your managers or the HR team that was task to lay you off they were really just doing their job in my case a senior director in Google who I consider a friend and a gentleman was tasked to bring this bad news to me and I could tell that he felt really bad still he treated me with respect back and he still did his job so being angry and bitter doesn't help you get your job back so try to be kind to others because no one really wants to do this lesson number four and this is the harshest is that your work friends will stop contacting you so this was a big shock to me after getting laid off because I thought I had close friendships with these people after years of working together and eventually I found out three reasons why your work friends won't really be there for you first is that they just don't know how to approach you some colleagues may feel that you need something time to yourself while others feel powerless because they can't really offer you a job or any solution so they don't really know where to start the second reason is that they are just as worried about layoffs okay so anyone who survived a layoff knows that there will always be more layoffs coming their way because the company is always Under Pressure to save more costs so your work friends are just dealing with their own work security they're trying to take care of their family so they may not have time or the HTE space to reach out to you third reason is that you simply no longer work there when I was a people manager in Google I will be hiring people and I will be deciding who to promote so naturally a lot of people will reach out to me to collaborate because that could help Advance their career now they are no longer there they move on to speak with the next person who can make such career decisions I'm just sharing this with you so that when you get laid off expect your circle of friends to really string that's why it's really important for you to have friends outside of work because you're going to need their support in this difficult time because if you don't have your friends support you might still have that self-doubt or low in confidence in yourself and this is setting yourself out for failure because if you were to go to interview for your next job the next employer they might sense that insecurity or vulnerability in you and they might take advantage and lowball you and give you a shitty job so remember let your friends and loved one remind you how awesome you are so that you can rebuild your confidence before you take your next step and speaking of your next step lesson number five is that finding your next job is going to Su so after taking some time to accept being laid off your next immediate priority is to find a new job and that's going to suck because jobs openings are few because the times are tough right now in my case I saw myself Panic reacting and just applying for any and every job out there I didn't even consider if those jobs were suitable for me and I ended up wasting a lot of energy throughout that process if I were to redo it again I will follow this 30 60 90-day framework so just ask yourself if you were laid off today how long would it take for you to find another job if it's going to take you 90 days that means that you have the right skills you just need to spend some time searching for opportunities if you're only going to take 60 days that means that you not only have the right skills but you also know where the job openings are that means that you have a strong Network and you are well connected but if you only need 30 days or less then congratulations you not only have the right skills and the right Network you have a great reputation that means that people cannot believe that you were laid off and the moment they find out they are offering you a job to join their team so think in this framework to know where to spend your time if you need to improve your skills your network or your reputation so those are the five Reflections and advice that I'll give anyone facing a layoff right now and it's the same advice I'm giving myself as I prepare for my next steps too I never had the courage to really do YouTube but this laid off give me the permission and no more excuses so the last bonus lesson that I want to share with you is that sometimes in life we don't jump we get pushed and as long as you're hardworking and you remain kind beautiful things will always find your way thank you for watching and please subscribe to see more of my videos take care