Emotion Coaching Parenting vs Emotion Dismissing Parenting

Emotion Dismissing Parenting

• Negative side, relates to authoritarian role.
• Role of Parents: Deny, ignore, or change negative emotions.
  • Example: When a child feels sad or angry, parents try to distract them, deny it, or change the emotion.
• Motivation:
  • Discomfort with negative emotions (parents get freaked out).
  • Authoritarian discomfort with child's negative emotions.
  • Overprotective parents not wanting their child to experience negativity.
• Consequences:
  • Children never learn to identify, process, cope with emotions healthily.
  • Potential adults might numb out or avoid negative emotions.
  • Reference to Brene Brown's talks on numbing emotions: You numb one, you numb all.

Emotion Coaching Parenting

• Approach:
  • Monitor their children’s emotions.
  • View emotions as opportunities for teaching.
  • Assist children in identifying and labeling emotions.
  • Teach children to process and cope with emotions healthily.
• Outcomes:
  • Children gain high emotional intelligence.
  • Leads to higher overall well-being compared to academic or career success.
• Parental Actions:
  • React in a less rejecting manner.
  • Engage in dialogues about the child’s emotions.
  • Use scaffolding (Vygotsky's theory) and praise to encourage proper behavior.
• Benefits to Children:
  • Better at self-soothing when upset.
  • Better emotional regulation.
  • Focus better and have fewer behavioral problems.

Nature and Emotional Development

• Personal Experience and Nature:
  • Nature teaches limits and adaptability.
• Example from TED Talk:
  • Girl exploring with her dad, learns self-reliance when he doesn't immediately help her after falling.
• Link to Parenting:
  • Overly nurturing parents might stifle emotional development.
  • Cuddling parents might dismiss negative emotions by fixing every problem.

Evolutionary Perspective on Emotions

• Hot Emotions: Instant, powerful (e.g., anger, fear).
  • Physical reactions for survival (e.g., fight or flight).
  • Examples: Anger can inspire action, fear triggers survival mechanisms.
• Cool Emotions: Slower to be felt, less intense (e.g., love, joy).
  • Longevity and sustainable feeling.
  • Examples: Love and joy take longer to build but last longer.
• Modern Context:
  • Outdated evolutionary