Conference on Conjugal Chastity

Introduction

• Opening Prayer: Hail Mary.
• Topic: Conjugal chastity.
  • A challenging but necessary topic, significant for those living according to traditional Church demands.
  • Addressing limits within the context of the conjugal act.
  • Advised that the conference not be discussed in mixed company.
  • Fathers take primary responsibility for instilling chastity and modesty in the family.

Definition of Chastity

• Chastity: Moderation of venereal pleasure.
• Continence: Willpower to remain steadfast despite tumultuous desires.
• Chaste vs. Continent: Chaste inclines appropriately without tumult, continent deals with tumult but remains controlled.

Types of Chastity

1. Religious (vows and promises): Requires absolute chastity.
2. Single Individuals: Chastity is required but can look forward to legitimate marriage where conjugal acts are acceptable.
3. Married: Chastity in marriage includes exclusivity, proper engagement in conjugal acts, and modesty.
   • Fidelity: Exclusive enjoyment within marriage.
   • Proper Mode of Conjugal Relations: Specific ways to engage in conjugal acts that are considered proper.
   • Mutual Acts (Foreplay): Certain foreplay is permissible within marriage.

Conjugical Acts and Terms

• Mutual Acts (Foreplay): Can be permissible or not; judged by specific principles.
• Pollution: Voluntary effusion of semen outside coition, like masturbation.
  • Applies to both men and women.

Grave Sin and Morality

• Grave Sin for Unmarried: Passionate kissing and foreplay are mortally sinful when unmarried.
• Proper Acts During Coition: Acts aiding coition like kissing, embracing are lawful if they help the process.
• Danger of Pollution: Acts leading to pollution are immoral outside of conjugal union.
• Three Types of Mutual Acts:
  1. No Danger of Pollution: Permissible for just reasons.
  2. Danger of Pollution but No Intention: Can be justifiable for grave reasons.
  3. Danger of Pollution with Intention: Always considered immoral.
• Specific Acts: Oral and anal acts (as described by St. Thomas and St. Alphonsus Liguori) are considered contrary to nature and hence immoral.

Marital Modesty

• Modesty Within Marriage: Important for maintaining proper conduct and preventing children from being exposed too early.
• Viewing Pornography: Forbidden as it causes senses to fall into undue matters.
• Family Planning and NFP: Permitted only for grave reasons like serious health concerns.
  • Should not be taught in a way that stimulates illicit desires.

Abstinence and Virtue

• Periodic Abstinence: Recommended for building virtue and moderation.
  • Encouraging detachment from created goods.
• Permanent Abstinence: Greater virtue but should be done by mutual agreement and often recommended after childbearing age.

Addressing Lust and Observation

• Looking at Beauty: Appreciating beauty intellectually is not sinful but it is a spiritual imperfection for married men.
  • Detachment from appreciating beauty in others is recommended for maintaining focus on one's spouse.

Practical Advice

• Communication: Discuss with spouses to reach mutual understanding and adherence to the guidelines.
• Education for Children: Parents should carefully manage the timing and content of sex education.
  • Better from parents following proper guidelines rather than from external sources.
• Homeschooling: To better control children’s exposure to immodest content.

Conclusion

• Final Remarks: Encourage clear communication, adherence to Church teachings, and seeking grace in conjugal union.
• Importance of Morality: Adherence to these moral guidelines contributes to spiritual well-being and family harmony.