hi this is Joe aaro and welcome back to people watching today I'm going to be talking about sitting behaviors now that may sound boring to you but I can tell you this sitting behaviors matter and that's something that you have to tell yourself that anytime we're in public whether it's a social event or a business event uh how we sit will be either appreciated or it may become something that people talk about if you go to Asia there are many rules as to for instance who sits first where do you sit and how you sit so be aware that where you are in the world sitting behaviors matter and this also applies to the Middle East and other parts of the world at a minimum we have to abide by social convention right so we're not going to be doing things that are distracting we're not going to be doing things that are rude we're going to do things that are polite when you sit down you can only claim as much territory where you're sitting as you are entitled to there's nothing more annoying than you sit down at a table and someone comes and spreads all their things out and now they're encroaching on you so how we use the territory putting our elbows on the table in many cultures is uh forbidden and stretching out on a table with elbows on the table is uh is also frowned upon the one thing you don't ever want to do at the table is become a distraction either by tapping on things playing with things jostling papers around constantly or vocally uh being a distraction I can tell you having been in federal court many times where a federal judge has looked at a council at table and said uh Mr so and so you're distracting the jury please stop shuffling those papers around now that's both embarrassing and it puts you on notice and obviously it scores negative points so it's not something that is often talked about but sitting behaviors do matter you don't want to do anything that's disquieting you don't want to do anything that is perceived as fidgeting whether it's with the hands or the fingers or a pencil you don't want to be too casual and you don't want to be leaning in so far that you're intimidating to others nor do you want to be leaning so far back that you are too casual and as we break these things down then you begin to see oh my this is a little bit more complicated than we thought best to mirror the behaviors of other people so something quick to to think about it's not often talked about but sitting behaviors do matter and it's your responsibility to abide by uh social convention so I hope you enjoyed this please come back [Music]